The darkness seemed to stretch on forever until I turned my head slightly and I saw the early morning orange glow slipping in through the crack in my curtains and I smiled.
I dropped the smile almost immediately as my face began to ache and I tried to ignore the cause as the memory rose to the surface of my mind.
If it was summer my entire bedroom would be illuminated with the orange glow that I loved so much and I wished that it was summer already just so I could sleep with my curtains open but alas winter was just starting and it was bloody freezing over night.
I sighed just as a knock on my bedroom door made me jump and I coughed before calling out, "Yeah?" I slid down into my quilt in an attempt to hide my face as I watched the door open to reveal Mum dressed for work.
"Heading out now, I'll see you tonight?" Mum asked with a smile on her face and I nodded.
"Sure will. Have a good day."
"I'll try, you too sweetheart."
I waved quickly before stuffing my hand back under the covers as the cool air bit at my skin and even though I'd slept with the radiator on my room was still too cold for my liking.
Listening out for closing of the front door, I finally built up the courage to leave my incredibly warm bed and brave the bathroom which I knew would not only be freezing but it would also serve a harsher reality reminder than the ache in my face gave me.
+
I kept my head down as I made my way from the tube station towards work and I knew that my make up was good but the paranoid part of my mind was convinced that people knew about the ugly blue and purple marking around my eye.
"You're late."
I flinched as I stepped into the café expecting to be chastised from the original statement but instead I was greeted by my mangers grinning face. I glanced up at the clock above the microwave and narrowed my eyes at Sarah.
"I like keeping you on your toes." Sarah grinned and I rolled my eyes in good nature as I relished in the warmth. The sound of the coffee machine already gurgling was somewhat surprising but I couldn't deny it was a welcome sound as I dumped my belongings in the office.
"Thank you." I nodded towards the coffee machine and water tank smiling the best I could without hurting my face too much.
"Not a problem, I know you life your morning coffee." Sarah told me with a genuine smile on her face.
I busied myself with the morning duties as I prepared for the day, my nerves spiking as Sarah stayed behind the till with me, tapping away on the screen every so often. I knew I was doing everything right and everything that I'd been taught but I was still nervous.
"So, what are you doing here?" I asked, trying to make it seem like a casual question as I made my way to the coffee machine and started to filter enough caffeine for both Sarah and I.
"Adding an extra option to the waste mode." Sarah responded easily enough and I looked over the till she was working on with furrowed eyebrows. Spotting my confusion Sarah motioned for me to join her silently.
"So you're in waste mode and you've put in everything you're doing and then when you press enter instead of using promotion we now have the option of family." Sarah explained and I nodded as I listened. "For when Darren or my girls come in and when your boyfriend comes in you know?"
I nodded again as Sarah finished explaining, "I could just make him pay for it." I suggested referring to Tommy even though I knew it wouldn't go down well with him and I'd just end up paying for it, in more ways than one.
"Don't be silly." Sarah shut down the idea immediately as I watched her log off the till.
"Coffee?" I asked, moving the conversation away from a topic that was bringing me more pain than joy this morning.
Sarah's grateful smile was all I could see as I finished making her steaming black coffee with the added four packs of sugar. "I'm going to be in the office for the morning but I'm hoping to be gone by lunch time."
I nodded as she raised her mug in a silent thanking motion before she left me alone in the empty café.
However I could only wish that my mind was as empty as the cafe but I had what felt like several hundred topics and conversations buzzing about in it as I waited for my first customer of the day.
+
I raised my eyes automatically as I heard the bell above the door to the café ring out and I felt my heart stutter as I watched Tommy follow a brunette man I didn't know past the counter and towards the back of the café without so much as glance towards me.
Chewing my lip I couldn't help but be disappointed at his dismal, I had thought after last night he'd be full of apologies like he usually was but the radio silence was deafening this time around and I knew I'd been foolish to think that he'd apologise.
I just couldn't figure out why he was so irritable and distance lately.
"May?"
I jumped a the sound of my name and focused my eyes back on the till in front of me, glad that Sarah had gone home at half twelve considering work performance was lacking. I smiled sheepishly as I met a set of semi familiar blue eyes.
"Sorry Niall." I apologised making both Niall and his friend laugh and I couldn't help the worried tug at my heart as I glanced in my boyfriends direction.
"It's fine buddy, how ya been?" Niall asked in good nature and I couldn't help but admit that Niall was easily the best one of Tommy's friends, he was nice and I liked nice. I just worried that he pushed the boundaries sometimes.
Although that was in no way Niall's fault considering he had no idea Tommy took it out on me.
"So so, how about you?" I asked as my eyes drifted to Niall's friend who smiled at me the moment I met his gaze. "I'm Louis." He grinned and I couldn't fight off his infectious smile as my lips twitched up.
"May." I introduced myself watching as he nodded.
"Been busy with work, sorry for hogging your boyfriend so much." Niall rubbed his neck as he spoke and I shrugged knowing it wasn't his fault and instead of replying I gestured to the till.
"Oh yeh, my bad. One espresso, a tea and I think 'Arry wanted a coffee." Niall nodded as he spoke and I tapped in part of the order.
"Mug or pot of tea?" I asked as I flicked the coffee machine on to filter.
"Mug please love but can you leave the milk on the side?" Louis asked and I nodded once more as I added that to the till.
"And what kind of coffee?" I asked looking pointedly at Niall who just shrugged.
"I don't fucking know, a black one." Niall groaned and I stifled a chuckle as I bit my lip, knowing I'd be annoyed too if my friend told me to get them a coffee without specifying it.
"Six thirty please." I told him as I pushed the transaction through to the card machine.
"Cheers buddy!" Niall grinned as he took the tray off the counter, the two of them leaving me in silence once more as I quickly added Tommy's favourite drink to the new waste mode option before beginning to make it.
The man Tommy had followed in looked up immediately as I put the mug down carefully and I was painfully aware of the silence that had fallen over the group the moment I had appeared and I couldn't stop myself from pulling my lip into my mouth as time seemed to stretch as Tommy ignored me.
"Thanks sweet cheeks."
I let out a breath I didn't realise I was even holding as he finally spoke to me and turned to face me with the extremely familiar blue eyes.
"We were just talking about you." Tommy smirked and I shifted on my feet.
"Only good things I hope." I smiled slightly, the ache reappearing. A harsh snort from the man with green eyes made me cringe as I glanced at him just as Tommy sent him a hard glare.
"Can only say good things about you buddy." Niall butted in and I sent a small smile his way before I excused myself.
I busied myself around the cafe once more, Monday, as usual was slow and boring and I couldn't help but wish Sarah had actually stuck around so I had at least someone to talk to. Even though the brief interruption of Tommy and his friends had been welcome, it wasn't enough.
"Well you better fucking go then."
I looked up as the voice sounded through the empty cafe and I quickly realised that it was the man I didn't know speaking, and I couldn't help the shiver that shot down my spine at how deep his voice was and how cruel it sounded.
Both Niall and Louis gave me a wave as they passed and I sent them both small smiles back as Tommy brought up the rear with a face like thunder which make me swallow apprehensively.
"See you later sweetcheeks."
Tommy's face didn't lighten as he spoke and I didn't get a chance to respond before they were out the door with just a half hearted wave from me.
I resumed my task of doing nothing except waiting for five thirty to arrive, only to jump as a figure appeared in my peripheral vision. Glancing up, my heart jumped once more as I looked up at another one of Tommy's friends.
"Here yeh' go." He gestured to the tray with their empty mugs on the tray as he spoke and I sent him a small wary smile.
"Oh you didn't have to bring it over." I told him, shifting on my feet somewhat awkwardly.
"Costs nothing to be nice."
I swallowed as I watched him smile and my heart beat increased for a reason I couldn't pinpoint and I glanced towards the front door wondering if Tommy was lurking just outside in the early evening gloom waiting for me to do something wrong.
I couldn't help but wonder if this was a test and Tommy wanted to see if I was indeed a slut like he'd called me last night.
"Thank you." I spoke quietly and left it at that as I instead busied myself unloading the try and loading the dishwasher.
I only let out the breath I was holding when I heard the bell above the door ring out and I snuck a quick glance over my shoulder to see the man stepping out. My eyes met his for another brief moment as he looked over his shoulder at the same time and I felt my cheeks heat as he smiled at me one last time before disappearing.
I couldn't help shaking my head as I was left alone in the empty café for what felt like the hundredth time today and for some unknown reason I felt warm inside for the rest of the evening, even with the radio silence from Tommy.