I woke up Saturday morning still completely wiped from the rehearsal the night before. When I check my phone, I see a missed call from Hayes time-stamped at twelve forty-two am, and my mind's gears are immediately asking why the hell did Hayes call me after midnight?
I press the call back button, but instead of him picking up, his voicemail does. "Hey, you've reached Hayes Benson, leave a message after the beep, or just text me like a normal person."
When I don't hear from him for another thirty minutes, I can't stop thinking about the worst-case scenario. When Ethan called, and I didn't answer- I- No. Hayes isn't Ethan. But I can't shrug the feeling that something is wrong.
I'd only been to Hayes house a few times, but I'm good enough with directions that I could get back; however, I didn't think about getting past the security gate.
"Please, I need to make sure he's okay."
The guard looks at me sympathetically, "Look, hun, I believe you when you say that you know him, but you wouldn't be the first one trying to get past to see him."
That goddamn asshole with morals. I grab my phone and pull up the missed calls, "Look, he called me at midnight, and I just want to see if he's alright. Please."
He adjusts his hat and stares at me carefully as if trying to see if I'm a trustworthy person, "I'll let you in, but next time you had better be on the list. What's the name?"
"Sephine Montgomery."
He shuts the window, and I breathe a sigh of relief as the gate opens. I pull my car forward into the neighborhood full of houses three times the size of mine. Jesus Christ, these are huge.
Getting past the next gate should be easier because the lady there should recognize me, considering I was here earlier in the week. Lucky for me, she does, but I don't recognize the BMW sitting in front of the steps?
I park behind it, and I have to admit that it's a gorgeous car, but I prefer Hayes's Audi over the BMW. Only a moment or two has passed before a maid opens the door and smiles warmly at me, "Hi, how can I help you?"
"I'm looking for Hayes? Is he here?"
She shifts her feet, "Well, yes, but-"
I'm sure I look insane, but if this is even remotely close to last time, I'm not sure I could go through it again. "I need to see him, it's important."
She purses her lips, "Do you know how to get to his room?"
I nod, and she opens the door to let me in, "Go on up then."
I smile gratefully at her, "Thank you so much."
The only reason I knew which room was Hayes's is because I made a comment last time I was here on the painting that hung by his door. It was an abstract one that looked somewhat familiar, and I asked Hayes about it. He looked at it and shrugged, "It's a Picasso but not one of his well-known ones." Pretty safe to say that my jaw was on the floor by that point.
I knock tentatively on the door, and Hayes opens it a second later. It's hard to put into words the amount of relief I felt at this point, and I instantly wrap my arms around him.
"Seph, what are you doing here?" He asks, closing his arms around me. I don't say anything because I just need to give myself a second to breathe after allowing my brain to go to the worst-case scenario.
However, instead of telling Hayes what I'm doing there, I pull him down to meet my lips. He complies immediately and cups my face gently. I don't want to talk. I'm just glad that he's okay. My hand rests on his bare chest, and he groans into the kiss.
I take my head out of reach to catch a breath before it's stolen back by Hayes in a swift movement. His hand cups my cheek and I smile into the kiss. I've wanted to do this since New Years, and maybe it's not a good time now, but when do good things ever come at the right time?
"I'm going to get going if you're okay with... that?" I jump back from Hayes like his touch has burned me while staring at Tessa, who has just come out of the bathroom.
My jaw has dropped while I try to wrap my mind around this. Then I take into account that Hayes is shirtless, Tessa's hair is wet, and she's wearing one of his shirts. "It's not what you think, I swear." Hayes tries to explain, except when I look at Tessa, she's smiling and continuing to towel dry her ebony hair.
I can't think of anything to say because there's nothing I could come up with that could explain this, so I walk away. "Sephine wait-" He calls after me, but I'm trying to keep myself together. "Could you just let me explain? Please."
It's the desperation in his voice that makes me stop, "I could believe you were doing this if it was another girl, but with Tessa of all people?"
"Do you even hear how crazy that sounds? Me being with Tessa or even another girl?"
It does sound crazy because of the way he was kissing me moments ago, but I refuse to accept that it could ever be that simple. Nothing is ever that simple. "It doesn't sound crazy because she is in your room, wearing your shirt, getting out of the shower, and you're shirtless!" With each point I make, my voice gets louder.
Hayes doesn't even flinch, "She was in my room because after picking me up last night from a party. She fell asleep while I was in the shower washing my puke off, and I didn't kick her out because I'm an asshole with morals."
It takes everything in me to keep myself from smiling at the asshole with morals comments, but I maintain my straight face. "Why were you at a party?"
"Because my best friend cheated with my ex-girlfriend, and I wanted a night where I could just feel like shit without worrying you. This girl took my phone and called someone to pick me up. I got a little carried away with how much I drank. That person just happened to be Tessa considering I refused to give her a name from what I can remember. She didn't even sleep in the bed, she fell asleep in a chair, and all I did was cover her with a blanket."
My anger is slowly slipping away as I start to see the reason in his explanation, but I can't get my hands to stop shaking. "That chair has my neck hurting like a bitch. I almost would have preferred that you kick me out so I could have gotten a good night's sleep. But it does make someone wonder why he didn't tell Mia to call his girlfriend to come pick him up? Don't feel the need to walk me out. I'm leaving." Tessa volunteers her opinion as she walks past us and out of sight, and I want to hit her, but she has a valid point. But then again she doesn't know that we're not actually dating so why would he call me? Can I even say that we aren't really dating anymore?
Hayes steps closer to me, "No, Seph, seriously, don't let her get in your head. You had dance, and you have enough of your own problems, and I swear I'm fine now. I just had to get it out of my system."
I don't know what to do. Ten minutes ago, I was hellbent on getting in here to make sure he was okay, but now I wish I hadn't come. I would have been better off without picturing the two of them together.
"Do you believe me?" He asks, looking at me carefully, and I find myself nodding.
"I think so," and that's all I have to say before he's kissing me again. It's sweet and slow, and entirely unlike every other kiss we've had, but it's still enough to make me weak in the knees. "Hayes, don't," I say after breaking it by turning away.
"Do you ever stop thinking?" There's amusement in his tone as he asks the question.
"Well, one of us has to! I mean jeez Hayes, your ex spent the night, and we just argued."
He gives me a lazy grin, "Well, it is said there's nothing better than makeup sex, right? Look, nothing happened between Tess and me."
I rest my head on his chest while his arm sneaks around to hold me, "Maybe this is the universe telling us that 'hey, you two are just meant to be friends,' but we ignore the universe, and then aliens come." Hayes bursts into laughter, and I hit his chest, "I'm serious, Benson. What if we are better off as friends."
"We might be better off staying friends, but since when do we ever do what's best for us? I mean, this whole situation is because we did the exact opposite Montgomery," Hayes speaks truthfully, and I can't help but smile.
"This is going to blow up in our faces," I try to reason, but he just rests his chin on top of my head.
"You don't know that."
I do, but it's nice to be held like this. It kind of reminds me of how Ethan and I used to be, but it wasn't ever this complicated.
"Seph just say yes, that's all you have to do." He presses a chaste kiss to my forehead, and I feel myself relax.
I can't let what happened with Ethan hold onto me forever, and at least with Hayes, there is familiarity considering we've been 'dating' for three months.
I wrap my arms around his torso and look up at him, "Okay." I agree, and Hayes smiles, and I mean, really smiles.
"Hi, girlfriend," He teases, and I feel the guilt slowly letting go. Ethan might have hated me when he died, but if he knew the truth, he would have just wanted me to be happy.
"Hey, boyfriend."
Hayes leans down and presses his lips gently against mine. I can't help but smile, and it only grows wider as he smiles after pulling back. "I think I like the sound of that better than my last name."
"Too bad, besides how hungover are you right now?"
He shrugs, "Extremely, but I could care less."
I narrow my eyes while trying not to lean into his touch because if there's one thing I can't resist, it's when people play with my hair. "How did you know there was a party?"
"Are you kidding? There's always a party."
I shake my head, laughing at him, "I guess I should have known."
"Do you not go to them?" He asks, cocking his head to the side, and I bite my lip.
"No, because I try to make it a habit of not getting in trouble."
Hayes smirks wickedly, "Then what are you doing with me?" The hand that isn't running through my hair has started tracing patterns on my lower back.
I loop my thumbs around the waistband of his sweatpants, "Breaking one of my habits."
Although it had been a swirl of emotions in the past twenty minutes with the confusion of Tessa being in his room and finally letting Ethan go, it was nice just to let myself be happy.
But you know what they say, secrets secrets are no fun unless they are for everyone.