this fiction is literally a !! whole-ass joke !! please don't kill me if you ever read this cameron shdudhsoehjw i love you so much <3
also sorry i disrespected you too yoongi but i made you look cool so .. thank me maybe 👁👅👁
reuploaded to wattpad because i'm exposing myself to actual people
18+ ....nsfw but like highkey cringe because i really sat here and TRIEDB to write this as a PROPER ONE-SHOT like that's my life right now this was like 4.5k words and i'll never be able to get that time back so please pray for me so that i spend my time more wisely in the future
mark is our boy mark from nct ;)
i write actual, good bts content over on ao3 xoxo
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In the point of view of Cameron oppar. uwu
/
Everyday seemed to end the same.
I live my life as somebody who constantly yearns for something new. I never seem to be happy with what's in front of me. Perhaps that's the problem with living this way, that's why I can't stick to a single thing. I don't mean to be rude or to ignore the good but it's useless. It's easier just to live in the moment.
I've never really been interested in dating since i'd broken up with Mark. After all, it felt easier not knowing I had someone to think about. I'd always been the one making decisions in our relationship as if raising a lost puppy who couldn't do anything for himself. Obviously it got tiring. Who can blame me? There just wasn't that 'spark' we had once shared and when something dies out, it can't be stopped.
Being with him just became.. unsatisfying.
I felt bad though, clearly it was only me who had felt the dip in the bond we shared because when I told him those words 'I have to work on myself' his tears were already falling.
But it's whatever. Now I don't have to deal with him.
Do I sound like a bad person? Listen. It's almost painstaking, having to come up with everything yourself. Especially for two people, if you can understand that. I'd always had this issue with my previous relationships. I always had to let them down gently, make them feel less bad about themselves.
Anyway, as I had mentioned, it had been a good while since I last saw his face. 8 whole months to be exact. To this day I wasn't really interested in a repeat of that long term experience, but it had gotten kind of boring sleeping alone. So I made the decision one night to go out once again and find somebody.
They didn't have to last forever. Just a single night would do.
All I wanted was a cute face to mess around with, I didn't care about much else. Hell, their name didn't even matter to me. They'd probably get attached if they learnt too much about me, beg to be babied or taken out for a date and i'd have to repeat the same stupid cycle.
The best place to find somebody i'd actually be interested in would be the club. I wouldn't care to admit it, but I only really attend the clubs for willing guys. Fresh faces come around every night, I wasn't exactly a regular, but I knew a few people who worked there.
It was the perfect time. Friday evening, going onto a deeper, more unknown night. Christmas had just rolled around and the 'warm family spirit' had eventually turned into younger people excessively partying and drinking their body weight city-wide. New Years was coming up so it wasn't surprising. I'd eventually entered the opening of the club which was pulsating with youthful life.
There were guys everywhere, drinking, dancing, touching.
I made my way to the bar and found myself surprised that there was space to sit down. The bartender had been busy making other drinks, so it gave me time to look around and see who exactly I was dealing with.
The club itself was kind of small. Not incredibly, but enough to see all four walls. But the lights were too dim and constantly flashing everywhere, so it was hard to see faces clearly. After a minute of scanning for a single person, I gave up. It would take more than just observing to find what, or who, I was looking for. Time passed slowly and nobody took my interest at all. The occasional guy would approach me, some going through with it, others too nervous and just walking past, eyeing me up and down.
I didn't think I was intimidating, but how seriously I was taking finding someone said otherwise. It almost felt like I was trying too hard. The men who struck up conversation were all odd. I didn't like them for one reason or another. The way that they looked at me drunkenly or gripped my arm, bought me cheap drinks, it didn't give me any attractive signs.
So they'd give me a number or something on paper but the second they'd leave, I would crumple it up and toss it to the floor.
After what felt like forever, it seemed like it might not get to happen.
Before entering I had sworn to myself that anybody would do but I found myself rejecting absolutely everyone who even came near me.
Maybe I was secretly looking for a specific kind of person. I didn't know what exactly.
"He's here. Fix up his regular drink."
The bartender who had been calmly leaning just feet away from me had received a message through some kind of portable radio. He rushed to pick it up and reply.
Who was here? The owner of this place?
I watched the poor guy, forced to ignore the protests of his other customers to focus on this one drink. Curiosity brewed inside of me as to why his hands were shaking as he made it. Every other second he would ask the guy on the other end where 'he' was.
The car. The parking lot. The entrance.
The double doors of the place had opened to reveal a shadow. Multiple, actually. It had felt like a whole parade of people had just entered the already busy club. They made their way through the crowd, getting smaller and smaller until just one silhouette emerged, stalking up to where I sat. They ignored me completely though, sitting next to me confidently and turning to the bartender who was now frozen. Of course it was a guy, but he was strange. His dark hair matched his eyes well which glared in front of him, it made his soft features feel threatening. A black blazer slung across his shoulder lazily over a crisp white button up which clung to his torso nicely. He was dressed for an occasion but it certainly wasn't for a club. Rings adorned his slender fingers as he took the glass from the bartender wordlessly. He downed it all in one.
I wasn't in awe exactly. That wouldn't have been the right word. I was more.. fascinated by him. Why was a man of his class in here? It was clear that most people around us were shocked too, stealing glances of him as they talked. It was almost unnerving, sitting right next to him. His presence was overbearing and felt like I could feel his every move. He didn't look that interested in anything, just throwing back drinks, focused only ahead of him.
As time passed, he didn't do much else. So my attention eventually turned away from him. I didn't move though. I sat there staring into my drink, swirling it a bit. Beside me, I felt a heavy pressure of a hand gripping onto my shirt. This random guy had sat down to my left, clearly not sober in the slightest. In one hand, splashing a drink everywhere, the other still firmly on me. He was smiling weirdly, staring at me as I just looked back in horror.
"He-ey." The guy began, slurring his words. "You, wanna dance?" He pointed dramatically to the floor across from us which was packed with sweaty, moist bodies. None of that felt appealing in the slightest, so I shook my head.
"Sorry. Dancing isn't for me." I shut him down politely, silently begging him to leave me alone. But of course he didn't. He shook his head, pushing into me more.
"C'mon! Just one dance. A handsome guy like you deserves it. Maybe then I can take you home and we can-" He laughed. But it wasn't a genuine one. I lowered my vision, making my voice more definitive.
"No. Really. It's okay." I turn away from him.
"I didn't want to do this." The guy joked, starting to take the fabric of my clothes and dragging me. I forcefully pushed his hand away in disgust, spilling his drink completely and standing up.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? Get off of me!" The yell was louder than I had expected, surprising even myself. The guy loosened his grip, looking at me as if I had just insulted him, yet still he wouldn't let go.
As the man opened his mouth to reply, I felt another firm, cold hand on my shoulder from behind me.
"This gentlemen is with me." A deep voice uttered.
I looked over to see the strange man from before. Still sitting there, now he had been glaring at the drunk guy. They shared a moment of uncertain silence before the drunk man let go of me completely. He had been watching the entire time. The guy apologised multiple times profusely and disappeared quick, leaving just me and the alluring businessman.
"Are you okay?" The man asked, looking at me with his head tilted. I couldn't quite look him in the eye.
"Uh. Yeah. I'm good. Thanks."
"Good. Well, I suppose I should introduce myself. My name is Yoongi. Min Yoongi. I'm a regular here."
So he didn't own the place. Really, he just came a lot. That was interesting. But just 'a regular' wouldn't get special treatment like he did. I was more drawn to him because of it.
"My name is Cameron." I rushed, unsure of what else to say. The nervous feeling had returned in my stomach. I couldn't quite figure it out.
"Cameron." He repeated. "It's nice to meet you. I don't think i've ever seen you here before."
The way he talked was sincere. Though his voice was raspy, he spoke clearly and confidently. I debated whether to tell him why.
"I haven't been here in a while. I was in a relationship, so I guess I didn't need to."
He nodded his head understandingly, still watching me closely.
"And you're.. no longer?"
"Yes."
"Ah."
He smirked slightly, moving his gaze to somewhere beyond my eyes. He thought for a moment.
"Well. Let me buy you a drink."
That seemed like a polite thing to do. Although it should have been me buying him a drink to thank him for helping me. However, half of the reason I came here was to get a free drink or two. So I didn't turn down his offer.
"Thanks." I replied.
He nodded before turning back to the bar.
"You. Give me the most expensive drink you have and double the price on it."
The bartender stopped again, looking back at Yoongi alarmed.
The most expensive? In a club in the city? Why was he doubling the price?
"Sorry?" The bartender asked, he hadn't quite believed what he had heard either.
"Your most expensive. If there isn't one. Make it yourself. I'll give you a tip if it tastes good."
He shot him a flirtatious smile and took out his wallet, placing down a matte black credit card. The bartender nodded once again, taking assortments of alcohol off his clean shelves. I still stared at Yoongi, dumbfounded.
He was clearly showing off his money to me.
Silly.
The money wasn't why I was interested.
I received the drink shortly and it turned out to be worth the money. The bartender got that tip and Yoongi's attention was back on me. After a while of talking, the alcohol had hit me pretty hard. I was relaxed now, but the thick air of the club was getting pretty hard to breathe. It was probably enough for one night. I needed to get home.
"It was to nice talking to you." I piped up, taking him off guard. "But I think I should go now." I smiled once more before going to stand up, before I could do much else, I felt him touch my leg slightly, causing me to stop in my tracks.
"Before you go," he breathed. "Tell me. Why did you come here?"
"If i'm going to be honest, I came here to spend a night with someone. Nothing serious, now i'm alone."
He watched me again, smiling slightly and running his tongue over his teeth. I couldn't tell what he was thinking but his smile was enough to make me want to right sit back down again.
Man. The alcohol was really taking over.
"I like that you're honest, Cameron." He mused before downing the rest of his drink quickly. He'd had what, five, six? How was he still functioning?
With that, he stood up too, his hand had gone from my leg gently to my wrist.
"Why don't you come with me?"
It wasn't even a question.
His eyes were dark once again all over me. He wasn't looking to talk more. In fact, I think by this time i'd figured why he was a regular at this club. Business man? Not a lot a time? It made sense what he did.
Or rather, who he did.
But in the end, I know I was there for the same reason.
Fuck it.
'Yeah, okay."
We exited the place shortly, walking together in silence. This time, the added pressure of his strong hand around my wrist was intense but welcoming. The parking lot had a nice, black car which I didn't doubt was his. I didn't know exactly where we were going but I could feel the anticipation bubbling inside of me as I thought of what was to come.
This was who I was looking for.
We got out of the car to be met with a large building in front of us. The car ride wasn't long but I was buzzing slightly, Yoongi wouldn't take his hands off of me the entire trip there.
The car ride had consisted of his hands wondering over my thighs and arms and me not protesting a single bit.
I wondered why he felt to possessive after just meeting me. Actually, my mind wondered a lot throughout that trip. Not exactly, clean.. thoughts if you know what i'm saying.
Really the question was: what was he?
Whatever he was, the thought of making this intense man my plaything seemed more appealing than ever. I felt my blood rush through me.
He did have a cute, innocent face. One that was willing to serve. After all, a businessman couldn't always want to be in charge.
Entering the basic building, Yoongi practically pulled me over to the reception. Quickly, he scribbled his name down and payed upfront in a wad of cash without a word. He didn't look very patient, not even glancing around him or the receptionist. Before I could speak up, he shushed me, smirking again as he looked ahead to the lift.
We made our way to the end of a long corridor before he used the keys open up a smooth wooden door. The room itself wasn't too expensive.
Clearly Yoongi didn't need to impress me anymore now that he knew he was getting what he wanted.
Upon entering, he had loosened his black tie and brushed the sweat off of his forehead. He didn't even have to wait before he had taken my waist and brought me in for a first kiss.
It wasn't forceful or anything like that. More, sweet. Endearing. As if to try me out.
Although he was quite a bit shorter than me, he didn't have any problem pulling me around and humming in delight at the kiss. The way that he sounded made my heart melt a little.
It had been too long since I had felt this sensation.
I reciprocated eagerly, feeling myself fight him for dominance. By this point, I was sure that he was like the others, dying to be told what to do. I waited for him to submit but instead of that, he pushed me forcefully against the hollow hotel wall. His unexpected strength made me yell out in shock. Yoongi grabbed onto the collar of my shirt, seductively pulling his lips to my ear and letting out a low:
"Did you think I was easy, Cameron?"
He laughed. But this laugh was cold, almost evil. Once again his lips met the skin on my collar and he chuckled again.
This sudden change in atmosphere and his cynical personality had made me nervous, my heart started hammering at this new feeling. I was burning up and he could feel it on every inch of my skin he touched.
I had come that night to be in control of the situation, to have my way with whoever the fuck I wanted and leave never looking back.
This wasn't what I had pictured, not at all.
What.. was this?
"Yoongi-" I began, breathlessly. But he stopped me, placing a pretty finger to my lips.
"You suddenly want to talk, Cameron." He mumbled, still kissing my neck hungrily. "It seems like you don't know how to listen when I tell you to be quiet."
Why was I surprised?
He was serious from the start, forward, glitzy, seductive. I was foolish to think he'd have been anything less than domineering. So, I know to shut up, holding my breath as he leaves marks on me.
"That's what I thought, good kitten."
He continued after my brief silence. His hands were still all over me. I found mine gripping onto his shirt. He held them briefly, before fumbling at his leather belt and pushing away to the bed that lay opposite us. It was happening extremely quickly and the blood in my veins was crashing through my ears. I'd really never felt this way before.
Who was Mark?
He motioned me to sit down before pulling out his belt completely. I sat, awed just watching him as he concentrated.
"Do you want this?" He asked. I nodded almost right away.
"Just do it already." I replied in a voice just as dark. "I'm waiting."
Yoongi smirked devilishly as he unbuttoned my shirt in urgency. The coldness of the bedroom air met me like ice. Afterwards, he slid his slender fingers down my chest, examining my skin. The contact made it hard to focus on anything else but him. After what felt like a lifetime of torturous teasing, his wondrous hands were finally placed on my jeans.
That was what he had come for.
That's what all that club talking and careless money spending had lead to.
Another forceful pull of them left him hovering above me, looking down, amused. He enjoyed every moment of this, his tongue poked out playfully like a cat as he continued to fumble around. The heaving of my chest was more than visible. Eight months had been a long, long time to endure. Would it have been cruel to say that 'making love' hadn't been this exciting even before that?
I was so dizzy, the air smelt like him and only him.
I didn't mean to feel this way at all.
He wrapped one hand around the nape of my neck playfully. The other palming my crotch.
"It's going to hurt." His husky voice broke the sounds of grunting and breathing. I paused for a moment, did he think I was unexperienced?
"I'm not a virgin," I began, my brows furrowed at his funny remark. It had never hurt before. But then again. I'd never been.. underneath. He shook his head playfully still amused.
What I had said was funny to him.
"Of course. Then you'll be good at this."
With that, he placed more pressure onto my crotch, causing me to groan in response. He wasn't going to be as careful and gentle as I thought but by then I was pleased to receive whatever he'd give me.
We were sweaty and I was getting more sensitive, harder with each passing second. It was something about him.
He was skilful, he'd done this many times before, knew exactly where to touch to make me feel good. My boxers weren't concealing what effect Yoongi had on me. The fact he could see it so easily made me red with embarrassment. Each glide of pressure caused me to let out small noises of pleasure.
He snapped at the elastic of my boxers, voicing his distain. And to be honest, in that moment I hated them too. I wanted to feel him around me right then and there. The last item of clothing had been carelessly discarded on the floor and he had much to do with me.
"Don't make too much noise, okay?"
This one night stand had become so much more tense than I had ever could have imagined. I was with a man i'd never met, but i'd given him trust no other lover had ever gained. Everything about him was so beautiful. I couldn't even remember who anybody else was. All that mattered to me was Min Yoongi.
All that mattered to Yoongi was my body.
"You ever taken it before?"
I shook my head. I'd always been top.
"Then tonight is a night you make some history."
He took a finger of his own into his mouth, swirling his tongue, letting the spit drip. I needed to start from somewhere, this was as small as it could get. A vicious bite of my earlobe and a light hushing noise made me warm. I let myself relax once again before feeling him circle me.
"Be a good boy for me."
He plunged into me and I gagged out in pain, my hips bucking. With his other hand, he held me down, stroking the side of my waist. His weight was on me so I couldn't squirm away but I was thankful for it. He kept a steady pace, allowing me to adjust to the new sensation. It was painful, but I wanted to feel good. With time, the pain subsided and morphed into a feeling of pleasure. I nodded eagerly in response to it, letting out noises and gripping onto his loose tie. He bent lower, face still slick with sweat. Without much warning, he allowed a second finger. Next, a third. I was opening up to him in unspeakable ways. This was all so new to me and it already brought me close to the edge.
I wanted to feel his skin more than anything. I was silently begging for him to take his shirt off. It felt weird having him fully clothed. But I couldn't protest after all he had done for me. My panting grew louder and louder until I was moaning for something. Nothing in particular, just for him. I was so close. I just needed-
Yoongi stopped abruptly, adjusting himself. So that his weight was off of my hips. I let out a groan of frustration. Why would he stop now?! He hushed me once again.
"Yoongi." I started, feeling empty. "I need it, continue."
He nodded as if he were listening, but proceeded to just sit there, breathing heavily and grabbing a towel on the side to wipe his slick fingers. Even then he was still classy in his demeanour. He motioned for me to wait and I twitched in annoyance. I had just gotten into it.
Throwing the used towel aside, he turned back to me. His fingers went to his black pants, gracefully undoing the top button. It didn't take long for him to ready himself. He enjoyed using his fingers, but it didn't do him any good. At least with time, he had become just as hard as I was. Nothing about him so far had let me down.
Especially what he had under that fabric.
The nerves had returned to me but the desire to be filled again was intoxicating. His weight dipped under the bed as he slid his hands down my thighs, raising goosebumps.
"You ready?"
I took a long, deep breath before I nodded weakly. I was more than ready for him.
Jesus Christ, just do it already.
Yoongi tapped my leg lightly before leaning over me once again. He had never been this warm since we had met and I could feel his shaken breath on my neck. He allowed himself a moment before pushing into me gently.
From the back of my throat, I let out a bubbly moan. The intense pain had returned once again, electrifying my abdomen as he pushed deeper. I allowed myself to dig into his arms, causing him to curse aloud. His eyes were screwed shut, focusing on the feeling of getting what he wanted. I couldn't even speak. All I wanted was to say his name.
He exhaled sharply, our eyes met and his tongue rolled out, his body twitching in bursts of pleasure. He gave me little time to get used to the feeling before he began to move, letting out strings of short words and growls as he did so. Once again, my hips moved simultaneously with him. I wanted to do my best for him.
It was so strange to feel like this for someone.
It continued just like that, being Min Yoongi's for a night. He treated me as well as I could have expected, lightly slapping my ass as he sped up and slowed down. I loved the sounds he made and how pretty he was when he groaned, even in the darkness of the hotel room.
This was a one night stand, but it was kind of a lot more.
Somehow he made such careless intimacy seem beautiful. I liked that a lot.
"Yoongi-" I uttered. "I..I'm gonna-"
He interrupted me with a passionate kiss, he let me know he already knew. His movements were sluggish, vicious but slowing. The energy was draining but the heat was still there. I had been dragged far past any kind of edge. He continued, still content in pleasing himself. With another jolt, I let out a helpless mewl as I came, his hands had been gliding softly against my dick, causing it to spurt out weakly. It felt so good, I couldn't even think. My vision was blurry and my heart had reached its climax too.
"Ah!"
But Yoongi didn't stop. He sped up because he hadn't finished himself yet.
He mumbled out my name again and again, carrying himself to his finish. By now it was hurting again, but I couldn't help but get lost in the need to please him. I bit down on my lip, letting small whimpers escape with each thrust.
"C-Cameron. You're so tight, fuck."
I let him fill me over and over until he let out his own feral whine, slick adorning our legs as he shuddered. We were both left panting, my head burnt. Tears had mixed with the sweat on my face and down my neck. Yoongi had fallen to his knees, head thrown back as he caught his breath. I sat up carefully, crawling to him. My hands made contact with his cheeks as I brushed his hair out of his eyes. The darkness within them had been replaced with a beautiful set of fiery colours, he looked back at me and chuckled once again.
He had controlled the situation just how he wanted. Just how I had originally wanted to do.
But rather, I knew I had become someone a little different after that encounter. I wanted to see Min Yoongi again. I wanted to see him everyday.
Before I could open my mouth, Yoongi had grasped me, pushing me onto my back and kissing me lightly once more, sitting on top of me playfully.
I had to ask him. Otherwise i'd regret it for the rest of my life.
"Yoongi."
"Hm?"
"Would you ever want to see me again?"
He looked at me, strangely.
"See you?"
"Be something together."
His eyes lowered at the statement. As if he'd heard that statement a million times before. Doubt had quickly flooded me, wondering if it was wrong to ask. He sighed, pushing his hair back.
"Uh. Listen. You're nice. But, i'm just not looking for a relationship right now."
He rolled next to me without much else to say, before sitting up to pick up the white shirt and redress himself.
My heart felt heavy then, a while after and has every single time I remember that night.
That's it. That was the time I, the one who notoriously rejects, was rejected by mysterious club-goer Mr. Min Yoongi and I haven't been able to forget him since. I wonder if
it's wrong to think about him when he's probably forgotten all about me.
But it's hard not to, since after him, now i'm always bottom.