Dedication to northbynorth
This one shot, in a way, is a continuation in the lives of the characters of SE (how I picture it in my head at least). The one shot doesn't completely focus on ElliotxElliot, but sort of shows everyone's life a couple of years in the future.
Enjoy!
Ps, there is quite a few puns/references to parts from the real book (go ahead and try to spot them if you like :))
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Saving Elliot
O N E S H O T | AMERICAN DREAM
It's been awhile.
It's been a long, long irreplaceable while but I suppose a part of me had just shut off to how long time had turned into since I spent the majority of this time given stressing about exams, about coursework, about projects and about internships... mainly just stressing, I suppose.
I loved being here. I loved waking up in this brand new place and having these new opportunities just handed right over to me - I loved university, it was like a given long list of experiences to meet people, to learn, to break and rebuild - but aside from all great stuff - it was also fucking difficult.
And it impacted my life majorly. Hell, it's taken over my life. There was always this part of me that wanted to save lives - I just didn't know that would mean giving up my own.
"You should get out of the house," Tam says as she eyes my beat figure sprawled over the bed. "Take some time off, stop wearing those . . . glasses," she adds uncomfortably.
I shoot her a look and I groan, rolling over slightly to find a spine of a thick textbook pressing into me. It hurts a lot more than it should, and I consider the fact that by keeping my mind so busy these days, my body has just given up on me.
"I can't."
"It's today, you know," her eyes narrow at my clear displeasure. "Arthur and Mac's birthday bash - no, don't look at me like that, Elliot! You should go with all of us, they're your brothers . . . and I promised everyone!"
My hands immediately reach for my hair, burying my fingers into the tangled mess. "I honestly can't Tam," I protest. Although I loved what I was doing and getting to where I've always dreamed of being - it was suffocating. There were days I woke up with blurry visions and forgetting what people looked like when all I was surrounded with were books. "I have a lot of bloody coursework to get through before Tuesday and I'm so fucking behind- it's already second year!"
A flash of pity goes through her eyes before she shrugs it off and simply says, "You're going, Elliot."
"You can't bloody make me!" I scoff. "My work isn't going to do itself."
She looks at me menacingly before charging towards me. "You know, I somewhat get it - you're trapped under so much work but Elliot, you've cut out everything for this," she says. "Do you even remember what your family looks like? When was the last time you spoke to them properly?"
I flinch uncomfortably at her words - had I really not seen my family for so long? Losing in touch with everyone else was bound to happen, that was life - but how much university work had I really stumbled into to let myself lose all social skills (if I really did have any before) and family?
"Fuck," I mutter as it dawns upon me, like a painful bucket of cold ice. I look up at Tamara, "I don't even think I remember what anyone back home looks like."
She exhales, now flinching at my own confession.
"Get changed," she says, turning the doorknob of my room. "You're in to see a lot of old faces," she adds hazily before leaving.
I frown at her words. "Tamara," I call out. "Tam- Tamara!"
She leaves.
* * *
"What's he doing here?" I shoot a look at Tamara as she sheepishly bites her lips.
"Good to see you too Jensen, baby doll," West cheekily grins as Tamara walks to his side lovingly.
"Piss off," I snap, though it was evident that I wasn't entirely annoyed by him with the humoured smile on my face. "I almost forgot how unpleasant how your voice was."
"Ah," he says. "I heard from Tamara, about how you're losing human contact in the process of becoming a doctor... kind of ironic, isn't it?" he grins playfully as I roll my eyes.
"Shut up."
"Well, at least you didn't lose your sense your sense of humorous profanity," he beams. "By the way, thank you to your brothers for inviting me to this birthday party... but- how the hell did they get so bloody rich?"
I frown, my eyes widening at what seemed like complete bullshit coming from West's mouth. "The twins - rich?!"
"She didn't see the invitation," Tamara whispers to West.
"Wha- what are you on about?" I frown, almost chortling at the fact that Arthur and Mac were capable of doing any job that would make them rich. "Seriously guys - what the fuck's going on?!"
"Get in the car, Jensen," West grins. "You're about to find out exactly what."
* * *
How the hell did the twins get so bloody rich?
West was right. That was about the only thought crossing my mind as I stepped inside the complete French décor mansion that apparently belonged to my brothers.
The twins- billionaires- what the fuck?
"Holy shit," West swore, his eyes popping at possibly every piece of Versace furniture. "Is this for real?"
"I'm so fucking lost," I cried out. "Are we at the right house?!"
There was no way we actually fucking were. The floor was decorated stylishly, with evident expensive furniture and decorations everywhere - clearly the work of a hired luxurious interior designer - and the house overall was just so . . . rich. Had the twins rented it?
"Sure are Jensen," O'Connor's faintly-familiar voice cheerfully butted in. "Fuck, it's been so long!" he complained, instantly engulfing me into a hug.
"O'Connor -" I beamed.
He stepped out of the hug as he looked towards me. "How are . . . things?"
"Busy," I exhaled with a slight chuckle. "All I do . . . is study. Medicine degrees are fucking hard y'know, and I haven't even reached Med School yet."
"No footy, I guess?" he wistfully smiled. I shook my head.
"Yourself?"
"Fuck yeah," he said. "Hopefully professionally one day- I play for my uni's local club-team but all in time," he grinned. "I'm thrilled to see you Jensen," he grinned while he dragged me into the (still luxurious) house.
"It's good to see you too, O'Connor," I feebly smiled as I realized entirely how much I had let go of everything.
* * *
"This is really good, Finley."
"I was surprised to hear that you can even cook," West chortled as Finley chuckled. There was a part of me that agreed with West, To be honest, I had no idea Finley could even cook this heavenly.
"I've been picking up things, while growing up," Finley modestly beamed, giving me a sly wink. "By the way, Elliot, the cake is something exceptional... a surprise for your family and yourself," he smiled mischievously. I anxiously flushed at my old friend.
"Where are the bloody twins?" O'Connor muttered as he looked at the clock again.
It shouldn't have been anything surprising to be honest - this was Arthur and Mac.
"Your whole family is here," Tamara nudged as I smiled adoringly at my parents and brothers coming down the stairs. My parents, in fact, had certainly aged the slightest bit in my year away from them (although Dad was still handsome as always, as Mum was still beautiful) where as my brothers looked just about the same and it was hard to not notice the bump in Charlotte's stomach who looked like she was expecting.
"Elliot," Mum cried out and soon enough, there were a bundle of hugs onto me. "I haven't seen you in . . . a while."
"Hey Mum," I smiled tightly at her. "And Dad. And all you brothers. You too, Corrine and Charlotte," I nodded my head towards the rest of them. They smiled.
"Uh . . . how are you?" most of them said.
"We missed you," Dad immediately added.
"Missed you too," I uneasily said. Meeting my family had suddenly become a lot more awkward and difficult than before, probably because of the huge time we spent apart and grown apart. We were all leading our own lives now.
"Cake's here!" Finley exclaimed after a while as he moved the wheels of a moving table with possibly, the most massive cake I'd yet seen. Mentally, I thanked him for butting in to what seemed like an interrogation of my university life from my family.
The cake, however, was about the size of me. In fact, even bigger.
"Holy fuck," a few of my brothers along with O'Connor and West cursed out loud. My parents didn't comment - all our attention was on the alien like cake.
"What is that?" Tam cried out in dismay. "Finley, how?!"
Finley cheekily grinned. "I had a blast making it, I can tell you that . . . the twins requested something special. So I reckon this qualifies?" he beamed as he looked at his cake like a masterpiece.
"I don't know what to say," Mum said.
"Don't think any of us do," I agreed. "That is one fucking large cake."
"Okay, let me light the candles - hold on," Finley said after a while.
I tore my attention away from the cake, back to my parents and family as we continued to talk rather nostalgically. It was surprising to see how much a year away could change.
Tamara suddenly shrieked. "Is the cake... moving, Finley?!" she squealed and as I turned my head in haste to tell 'of course not', I realized that in fact - it fucking was.
The cake was fucking moving. It was wiggling around, as if a couple of rats had gotten inside it and running around (the thought of that makes me want to throw up), but it was still fucking moving.
Finley's eyes widened. "Uh..." he nervously smiled and I shot him a look of horror. But then he leaned in closer to the cake and whispered (quite loudly in fact), "Uhm... Guys? Arthur? Mac?"
"What . . . what are you doing?!" a few of us shrieked at him (as it looked completely insane for a grown boy to be talking to cake).
"We're stuck!" the twins' familiar voices shrieked and my eyes widened at the fact that their voices were coming from inside the cake.
My brothers were inside the cake. The twins were inside the fucking birthday cake.
"Finley . . . uhm, why are my brothers inside a cake?" I voiced out, noticing the loss of words from anyone else. Finley looked at me anxiously.
"How did you even fit two grown men inside a bloody birthday cake?" Nick asked.
"Uh... you're better off not knowing," Finley gave a nervous smile and I scoffed in both amusement and fear at the turn of events.
"It's... getting hard to breathe!" Mac's voice squealed and West immediately chortled in amusement.
"Hold on," O'Connor's cool voice said to them as Finley and him began to get knives and make small cuts into the cake, as if cutting regular slices.
"Oh God," Mum groaned, her palms shooting her face as she looked completely unimpressed. I watched my Dad fight a smile as he comforted her.
Finally, O'Connor and Finley stepped away. "Uhm... Surprise!" Arthur and Mac gave anxious smiles after they shot out of the cake, cream completely covering their cheeks and arms.
"Anyone want a hug from a birthday boy?" Arthur said as he winked at no one in particular. "Elliot?" he said in surprise as he noticed me.
"Arthur," I nodded. "You guys look like shite," I commented at the two idiots covered in icy birthday cake cream, which suddenly did not look so appealingly delicious anymore. crossing my arms. They shrugged.
"This tastes great," Mac (disgustingly) licked the cream off his arm. "Good job, Finley!" he added as he grinned with cake all over his mouth and teeth.
Finley beamed. "Anyone else want some cake?"
* * *
"So how'd you get so rich?" was the first thing asked on the table.
"Secrets, my friend," Mac replied to West as there was an echo of chuckles and groans on our table.
"Oh just tell him, Mac," Mum scoffed as she served the plates onto the table.
"Fine," Mac sighed. "Basically, Arthur and I went to South Korea for a little trip last year, we discovered this thing called SMTown there and they decided to hire us... and voila, we're rich!"
"I want to ask what SMTown actually is," West said as he grimaced. "But I think it's best if I don't." I nodded in agreement.
"They make music," Mac rolled his eyes. "We make music," he smirked.
"Wait . . . you guys make Korean music?!" Tamara chortled.
"It's called k-pop," Arthur beamed.
"You became a fucking Korean pop star?" I said appalled as everyone unaware of this around me choked.
He gave a cheeky grin as Mac high fived him. "They love us!"
"What?" Mac protested as he watched me look at him in horror.
"You can't sing for shit, Arthur!" I reminded and there was an echo of agreement. "Oh, nor can you Mac, stop smiling!"
"Nothing some little production effects can't solve," Mac winked. "You jealous, Elliot?"
"Oh piss off, T-Pain," I scoffed. "This is bloody ridiculous," I decided.
One year apart from everyone, and this was what they fucking gotten up to?
I clearly had missed a lot more than I'd like to think.
The rest of the dinner went by a little similarly, bit by bit, I caught up with each and everyone's life. When the turn came to me to tell what had been happening in mine- the only thing I could plainly and truthfully say was studying.
But no one said a word about how things were going for me or bring up old memories from high school, and I didn't dare say a word about it either.
"It's really good weather right now," O'Connor said after a while. "Let's go outside," he nudged as everyone instantly got up with a somewhat sly smile playing on their lips.
"Yes, let's," Tam smiled with a glint as she grabbed on to my hand, walking outside to the balcony of the twin's mansion. The cold breeze of England immediately hit my arms and I groaned, realizing my lack of appropriate clothing for the weather.
"It's fucking cold, you idiots," I protested. "What are we doing here?"
A giggle escaped some of their lips and I glared at them. "What?"
O'Connor smirked knowingly as he grabbed ahold of my arm, turning my entire body around to face the edge of the balcony and immediately; I inhaled sharply.
Like one would feel the familiar feeling of nostalgia as they re-watched an old favorite Disney movie or looked at childhood pictures, I felt something like that; my head turning slightly light headed and my knees losing control as I tried to even comprehend anything surrounding me.
But it was impossible.
Because with the all too familiar cocky smirk and lazy posture against the balcony railing, Elliot Fintry was stood there, in front of me, standing underneath the moonlight.
* * *
"Jensen," he said after a minute of silence.
And just like that, my heart began pounding again.
I didn't say anything back as I continued to lean across the railing, unable to think with him so close to me. Fuck, why had everyone decided to leave the two us alone together?!
"Jensen," he repeated slightly louder this time and I pursed my lips as tight as I could, not daring to look at him or twitch a muscle.
There was no denying that in the year I successfully avoided mentioning him or having to be in presence, he'd gotten a lot more attractive. It wasn't like before, where his hair would always be windswept and messy as he wore the most rebellious outfits to school. He now was looking a lot more cleaned up, young but professional as if he'd matured quite a bit in his own time but even without the messy hair and teenage boyish clothes, he still managed to make me feel completely head over heels in love with him.
"It's been awhile," he said, finally turning away from me as he stood closely beside me, leaning against the silver, cold railing just as I was.
"Yeah," I finally said. "It has," I quietly said. I felt his stare come back to me, looking at me closely, examining me just as I subtly did him as if he was mentally noting down everything that had changed.
Paler, exhausted, large dark circles from pulling all nighters studying, weight lost but most of all, the thing I assumed which bothered him the most as he frowned with most displeasure at, was my hair. The same hair that once couldn't be tamed to sit down for 5 proper minutes was now losing its volume slowly and slowly, sitting itself down, unraveling the frizzy curls.
In other words - I looked like a misery. A completely tired and fed up down student, trying to live with her sacrifices of love and family to get through university so then she could live through some more years of studying until she could finally become a doctor.
"How is it?" he pursed his lips. "Studying to become a doctor."
I exhaled through my nose, chuckling without a sound. "Really fucking hard," my voice croaked. He looked at me some more, for a shorter while this time and I didn't even dare try to imagine the thoughts he had as he looked at the girl I'd become.
I was not embarrassed to be who I was now, I could easily and confidently meet people, telling them my ambitions and future and they would respect that and I would love that.
But with Elliot Fintry constantly comparing the girl I was now to the one who would plan ways to get revenge on him and stubbornly piss him off - it made me feel uncomfortable.
I was no longer the girl who fell in love with him and he was no longer the boy I fell in love with.
He was mature, even speaking to him for such a brief time could tell me that. He'd grown up, he wasn't trying to play any games no more, he was genuine - he was like how I imagined him in my dreams.
Perfect.
"But you're happy?" he softly asked.
I didn't reply instantly then, slightly taken aback by his question. "Yes," I finally said. "Yeah, I really want to do this. Whatever it takes," I admitted, insinuating giving up everything between the two of us.
"Okay," he quietly said, possibly feeling the slightest bit hurt. "I'm doing Philosophy as my degree," he added.
"Wow... that's... really interesting."
He beamed. "It is. There's so much to learn, and think about, it really changes the way you look at a lot of stuff," he said, passionately talking all about his course and university. He was happy. He really was - it was like when he talked about Nova or his family, he would subconsciously smile and be happy for a moment - something he never fully was with me.
"That's great," I uncomfortably smiled as he nodded. "I'm happy for you."
"Thanks," he said.
There was a pause. The silence between us was uncomfortable, it was dreading but neither of us dared to break it. What was there to say? What was there to even do?
We weren't the kids we once were; we were just the pathetic shells of those, ghosts. The people we once were - they were a dream away.
"I miss you Ellie," he admitted, speaking in a tone so audible that I might have not caught on to what he had said if I wasn't paying the right amount of attention.
" . . . Yeah, I miss high school," I evaded horribly, feeling the twist in my stomach as I realized how much I must've put him through. Falling in love with him, getting him to fall in love with me, then escaping off to university and never getting back to him. Letting him go, even when he finally didn't want to leave.
"What a love story," he chuckled, shaking his head. "Mine and yours. I'll tell it to my kids one day."
I frowned, a flutter in my heart from the fact that he had just talked about his (currently non existent, I hope) kids and how he was going to talk about him and me in front of them. "It's not a love story," I declared rather quietly. "It's a story about love."
He looked at me in the second as if I was insane, which in fact I sure was in his presence, before he said, "Do you think we could ever work out again?"
I paused. "Maybe we couldn't then... Maybe in a few years, when we're older and not as hateful to each other," I smiled as he chuckled, possibly recalling the day he cut my hair, or dyed my hair, or did in fact anything to my hair.
"Those years a long while away," he commented with a sad smile. "Becoming a doctor ... those are some sacrifices you made."
"I did," I despondently smiled. "But I don't regret them."
I didn't. There were times, that I hated my fucking lectures and I hated the bloody workload and most of all - I hated the unnecessary stress - but I was determined to do this. I needed to prove this to myself that I could. And I was going to.
Even if it somehow meant giving up the dream of Elliot and I.
"I'm happy then," he said in a tone that made it clear that he wished we somehow could be happy together instead of apart. "I'm happy you're happy. I'm happy that we got the time we did together, even if we did hate each other," he continued, chuckling deeply. "This is reality, isn't it?" he boldly added.
Reality... that was what this was.
Surely there would be times where I would sob and groan and complain, about losing in touch with my friends, about not seeing my family as often, about parting away from Elliot.
But there were some things that I was apparently unsafe to escaping, like stress, love and the reality.
"It is. But I don't have any regrets."
He turned to me. "Good. Neither do I."
And it seemed like the story of us, Elliot Jensen and Elliot Fintry, didn't seem to end well either.
Perhaps, there will come a rather shitty day after my exam or lecture and think how I hate becoming a doctor, and then I'll remember the rough beginning of Elliot and I, followed the memorable journey after like a bitter reverie. And perhaps, I'll then mourn about everything that happened. And that unlike other boring and bland love stories, our story never ended well.
But then I'll remember the best ones never do, and I'll be okay again.
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N O T E
(American Dream is the alt. title of Lana DR's song, Damn You which I found more fitting so hence the title)
I really hope you enjoyed this, even though it didn't end with elliotxelliot together, but i mean- becoming any sort of doctor is hard. i wanted this to be realistic, and in the real world, you have to give up something you like to get something you love - you win some, you lose some. so yeah to me, elliot j. is head-strong, i pictured her very studies/career orientated which obviously ended in her choosing (her path to) career above all, which although may sound depressing to someone else - she's happy with her choices, and i think that's the most imp. thing.
if you enjoyed this please do leave a vote/comment so i can know what you think! feel free to check out my other works, like games we play :)
- reyna
ps - im so sorry if this screwed up the characters or if was boring