Authors note‼️‼️
- I changed the cover of my story and if your wondering who make it, credits go to Vickyy_321 you should definitely follow her and read her story!! It's so good!! Now let's get into the story!
Aera POV:
After the Hyung line finally let me out of the tight hug, we started to know each other better. After what seemed like a few minutes Mr.Bang came back to the studio. He explained how instead of me moving into the dorms tomorrow morning, I should move into the dorms today. It was only about 11am when me and the boys started moving my things. Once all of my belongings were in the dorm I started getting settled into my shared room with jungkook.
Once I finally finished getting settled I heard seokjin scream "DINNER IS READY!" I made my way into the kitchen and sat down next to jimin and Taehyung. You would expect a dorm filled with 8 people would be loud and noisy but no, we all ate in silence. All of a sudden the sound of a phone ringing filled the silent room. Everyone looked at each other and that's when I noticed it was my phone. "Pardon me..." I said to the others, while walking out of the room to answer my phone. When I looked at the caller ID I noticed it was my older brother Kai calling me.
-ON THE PHONE-
"Hi Kai"
"Hey little sister! Bang Pd told me about the news!! You must be excited!"
"Yeah! I am! They all seem like sweet and caring guys"
"Well that's good! I just wanted to congratulate you, I should get going. Stay healthy little sister!"
"Bye kai love you"
"Love you too"
END OF CALL
I put my phone down and start walking to the kitchen when all of a sudden I hear a males voice saying "honestly we were perfect with 7 members. All that girl is gonna do is create problems. She's not even that talented. We're called bullet proof BOY scouts for a reason." Once the male stopped talking I remember who's voice it belonged to. Yoongi. I knew he didn't like me, but talk about me behind my back?
A few tears called down my face without me noticing. I calm myself down and I walk back to the dinning table, take my plate, scrape all the food into the garbage, and walk back to my room all without saying a word to either of them. I crawled into my bed and silently sob. I started thinking to myself...
"Am I really not talented?"
"Should I make everyone's life better and just leave?" With me thinking all these things i got up and went to the bathroom.
TRIGGER WARNING‼️ IF YOU GET TRIGGERED BY SELF HARM PLEASE SKIP OVER THIS UPCOMING PART!!
I looked at myself in the mirror. I'm pathetic. Talentless. A piece of garbage. While thinking these things I take my razor blade and roll up my sleeve. I make three cuts into my arm, I sob while doing so. I guess I sobbed too loudly that I heard someone knock on the door.
"Aera? Are you okay? Are you crying?" I heard the sounds of a worried yoongi.
"Why would you care? Leave me alone." I said back.
"Open the door right now!"
I make two more cuts deeper cuts into my arm. Before I can make another one, I felt strong arms around me. I look up with tears in my eyes, to my surprise I see yoongi. I try pushing him away but he's too strong.
"Aera...why are you doing this to yourself?"
"YOU THINK I DIDNT HEAR WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT ME TO THE OTHERS!?!?" I yelled in between my sobs.
"Aera I'm sorry, I didn't mean any of it. It's just hard for me to trust new people-"
I cut him off before he could continue...
"And you think it isn't hard for me!? It's hard for me to trust people in general! Especially men! But look where I am, I'm surrounded by a group of 7 men! And did you see me talking bad about any of you!?"
"I know...and I'm sorry for treating you badly, for talking behind your back. Can we start over please..? I promise I wouldn't treat you badly again" He said while a tear rolled down his cheek.
I wipe his tear away and smile "I would love that"
He helped me clean my cuts and once we were finished he lead me to the others. Once we reached the others they all pulled me into a hug. After a few minutes they finally let go of me. But before anyone could scold me I heard someone call my name.
"Aera..." jungkook spoke up.
"Yes kookie?"
"What did you mean when you said it's "hard for you to trust people. Especially men."?
I stared at the floor, thinking if I should tell them about my abusive childhood. I took a deep breath...
"I have a hard time trusting men that aren't my brothers because of something's that my father did."
They looked at me confused.
"What did he do?" Namjoon asked
"When I was about 5 years old my father became a heavy drinker. Due to all the drinking he developed a lot of anger. He took all his anger out on me. Beating me. Yelling at me. Calling me names. Downgrading me. Telling me I was worthless. The abuse continued for years after. My mother was in the hospital fighting for her life, my brothers tried to help me but I wouldn't let them. I was scared that my father would start abusing my brothers. After my moms death, I finally had enough for the abuse so I decided to run away. To start making an image for myself I started performing on the streets. That's when a bighit employee found me and I auditioned. And here I am now. And thats why I have trouble trusting men." I said while hugging my knees close to my chest sobbing.
I stayed like that for a few minutes until I felt yet again another pair of strong arms wrap around me. But this time the arms pulled me into a tight hug. It was yoongi. He hugged me for a while and he whispered sweet things in my ear to help me calm down. I ended up falling asleep in the hug.
(How you and yoongi looked)