Hey guys, sorry for the long wait. I admit I was procrastinating and also in writer's block. Please enjoy the chapter and tell me what you think. This chapter is dedicated to MoonstoneCrystals for her awesomeness and crazy comments!
The sound of the utensils being placed on the table was rough and harsh as it came to my hearing sense. Impression by early morning hit me as I hear the sound of a whistling kettle. Colour me impressed; when there's a kettle, his bestfriend named coffee is present. The strong aroma of dark coffee intoxicates me and made my eyes open. Not a morning person but I'd love the concept of a nice breakfast.
Slowly opening my eyes, I noticed how different the bed I am lying is on now. Okay, I mean, it's a sofa. As I rose up, I felt a little bit dizzy and my eyes were heavy. Scanning my surroundings, I recalled I slept on the Neuton's house again.
"You're learning to feel at home, yes?" I was startled when I heard someone speak behind me.
Turning around, I caught sight of Chuck. He's wearing his black pants, his white plain shirt hanging on his left arm. A cup of hot coffee was displayed on his other arm while his bare feet stood up on the cold floor.
"You're not gonna fool around walking in your house shirtless early this morning. You're not muscular, get over it, Chuck." I rolled my eyes at him and stood up from the sofa.
He scoffs and at the same time smirked at my remark. Placing the cup of coffee on the near table, he finally put his shirt on. He kneels down under the cabinet to find something he is in searched for.
"Are you guys dating or something?" He asks, sounding like a mad man.
Shaking my head, I stare at him, overly surprised at his sudden question.
"I swear, I'm gonna put myself under sedation because I hate seeing lovebirds on my screen," he commented, still looking for whatever thing it is.
"Do you need help?" I offered, couldn't survive watching him fretting at this hour.
"Looking for slippers. Go volunteer," he commanded, wiping the trickling sweat from his temple on the upper sleeves of his shirt.
"So... how's the project going on?" I said out of nowhere.
"Halfway from the road end," he sighs.
With continued search of his slippers, my hands finally caught it under the sofa.
"Is this it?" I asked, raising the slippers and showing it to him.
He let out a sigh of relief, "Damn, he couldn't afford watching you suffer while he hides. Throw it!"
He signals me to throw the slippers to him while he catches it.
"Wow, you have some special bond with your slippers. He's a 'he', does it have a name?" I joked, seems fun to treat his slippers like human.
"Baptize him," he implored, putting it under his feet.
"Give it a go, I'm not gifted with giving names," I smiled, lifting up my hair into a messy bun.
He gazed at me for a while, maybe studying me, and later on his lips formed into a smile.
"His name is Bun," he tells me, walking to the table and lifting the cup of coffee in his hands.
"Wow. That was... genius?" I laughed softly.
"Don't question my idea. Now, let me ask you, what's with the swollen eyes?" His tone became serious, hardness comes with it.
On their backyard stood a huge shade of tree which illuminates his dark and gloomy ambience. Beads of sweat covered his temples like he had just came from a heavy morning routine. He bits his lower lip, trying to wait for my response which never came easy.
"As the saying goes, let bygones be bygones. Don't let me remember all the bad times, Chuck. Just..." I trailed, running a hands on my hair, "drop it."
With his monstrous footsteps, only taking less than a second, it made my heart breathless. I was afraid. Last night would be the last time I'd open up all the ripped pieces within me. With Chuck, I'm afraid he'd probe me questions I never think I'm confident telling him.
"I've been broken, Lauren. I wanted to meet people with similar situation," he steps closer and I looked away. He seemed like he wanted to comfort me in the best way he can.
"I don't wanna talk about it," I speak, my fist forming into a ball, eyes aching slowly.
He sighs, his morning breath which had an aftertaste of coffee brushed instantly on my face. Turning around, I see him crooked his neck over his chest, feeling disappointed I never told him.
"Sure you discussed this with Cain. I wish someday, you will have the freedom talking to me without hesitation." He held me in his gaze and I gave him a nod.
We could hear Cain's footsteps coming on our way as it gets louder. He steps backward, trying to get away from me.
"Hey guys, breakfast..." he stops as he saw us fighting in silence.
"I...um, sorry. Just get there when you're both ready."
He glanced at us, trying to figure out why the room was filled with awkward silence. To escape from it, I immediately walked out of the room to follow Cain.
• • •
Cain argued in taking me for a ride to my class today but I said no to him. He's given me so much of his time even if it meant sacrificing his sleep just to comfort me. On the other hand, I was worried sick Chuck's mad at me for not telling him my problems. He never sat down with us for breakfast. His room was locked and the music were blasting too loud.
Classes was kind of dull today, just answer sheets and dismissed as early as possible. I sat on my usual spot, near the exit door while the others gather up their things to leave the class. Letting the time pass, I just sat there, my eyes studying the people passing by and wondering what kind of stories they might have. Or were they broken or not?
Mrs. Lopez, our teacher, stands up from her desk and clears up the board from the messy scribbles during lectures. As she finished the board, she went to arrange the books scattered on her desk and pile it neatly. Soon after that, her fingers picked up her foggy glasses and throwing her hands on the air, she yawns. As she caught me watching her, her face heated in embarrassment.
"Hey, Mrs. Lopez!" I waved at her.
She strides toward me, half-smiling while fixing her dress that's been pulling up whenever she moves.
Sitting up next to me, she states, "Ahh, it's been a pretty hectic day for us all."
Nodding, I say, "Yeah, if lectures are burden to us, it would be the same for teachers like you."
"Seems to me you're experiencing some burden down there," she whispers, pointing right through my chest.
Giving her a small smile, I shook my head as if it would easily convince her I was telling the truth.
"Miss Grace-" She was about to say something when I stopped her.
"Just call me Lauren, Mrs. Lopez," I beamed.
"Sure, Lauren. I've taught students for so many years and some of them came to me for a pep talk. Broken, happily ever after, roller coaster journeys, and even those being called in heaven." She summarizes all the people she'd talked to in her past times. She's in her mid-40's and I am quite sure she came across different stories from her students.
"I guess I'm categorized in the first one," I sucked in breath, laughing nervously.
"I've been in love. But I never married someone I love. I married another man," she states, staring at newly manicured nails.
"How so, Mrs. Lopez?" I inquired, leaning closer.
Lifting up her head, she stares at the white board stood before us, "The guy's named Luke while I am Helena. Completely living in the opposite worlds. Family feuds, fighting over legacies to take over, even choosing who to marry. Luke soon gave up in his family's decision and left me."
Her eyes glimmered with liquids but it never came out. She bit her lip, trying to show courage in front me.
"I'm so sorry, Mrs. Lopez. That must have been terrible." My voice cracked, terrified I must have triggered some immediate flashbacks to her.
She lets out a weighty sigh and gave me a rueful smile, "You don't have to, I've talked about it to my students for the past years. I learned talking about it without bursting out in tears."
My eyes were frozen, as I stared at her, wondering how she survived from the brokenness.
"Surviving brokenness is like trekking the stairs of the Great Wall Of China," she stretched out her hands as if measuring its length.
"... it starts like you're feet have walked the grounds of hell but when you reached the top, you'll be completely amazed by its breathtaking scenery and how far you've gone just to see that. Like a shattered heart, people never stop wasting tears for days, weeks, months or even years. But if they continued fighting, they'll be amazed by how far they've come."
My mouth parted yet no words came out of it. Seems like Mrs. Lopez had been engulfed in too much brokenness several years ago but she completely moved on from it.
"Wow," I gasped in awe.
She chortled softly, completely wondering what to say next after I wowed at her story.
"I should've been listening to your burdens right now instead of making an autobiography, haha." A pink glow coruscated her face as she laughed nervously.
"That's fine. I mean, it's delightful and an honor to hear such story from you." I gave her a genuine smile.
"We would need a cup of coffee to keep us awake at this hour. I've written all my feelings in a journal while I was with Luke." She warns me, wondering if I have the time to stay and listen to their story.
"That's a dedication, keeping track of your emotion doing at that time. Luke sure would feel much better if he scans it and remember every words in it."
She shook her head, "I gave it to him when he tells me he'll marry another girl. I didn't know what he felt upon reading it, never heard of him ever since."
"That's... tragic," I commented, totally out of words right now. It was too much for her to handle but she was too strong to conquer it.
"I know," she replied.
"That's hard to survive, Mrs. Lopez. What did you do to... like... level up? I mean... to forget. And move on." I messed up a lot. Little did I know, my fingers trembled because of anxiousness.
With her eyes darted to me, a genuine smile was plastered on her faćade. She places her palms on top of my shaking hands, "Oh dear, you seem like you were having difficulty."
"I'm stuck, Mrs. Lopez. But I am trying, so much, to get out of it."
"Well, there's no specific ways to follow. It depends upon your relationship with that person. In my case, mostly, we squandered too much time talking about foolish and nonsense things. Basically, conversation was what kept us going," she paused, tucking the tiny strands of her hair at back of her ear.
"If the conversations becomes insipid, stop. It's never gonna work if only one reach out to the other. It's ought to be the two of you, working it together," she added.
Approaching my teacher for an unexpected moment was quite embarrassing. But this time, it's a blessing in disguise. She gets to tell me her own story and suddenly, she became my inspiration.
"The memories, it will forever stay. You will never forget and that hurts. Fight and move, there's a lot in store for you out here." She looks at me, giving me encouragement to go, walk, step up from being stuck in this feeling.
"You are so inspiring, Mrs. Lopez," I breathed out, completely wondering what to say next. Mrs. Lopez's words dumbfounding because it was so damn true.
"Real soon, you're gonna tell that to yourself. I believe you will," she pats my shoulder and smiles at me.
• • •
Walking the streets in New York has never been a huge burden to me these days. In fact, it's becoming a favorite. Though walking may be a bit tiresome but it gives me a chance to browse the beauty of the place. At day, none of the sound of car honking at traffics, New Yorkers chatter, and exasperating sound of backhoes and bulldozer in an unfinished road were my preference. It's the light rays of sun reflecting to anyone's face, freckled or not. It's the weird affection for sun rising and sun setting. At nights, the lights overlooking the city, the feeling of joy that it's the end of my shift, and the feeling that I get to go home and talk to my loved ones.
I've felt all of it here, which was intense. It's different out here in this place. The only thing that's not good is missing the home I used to grow up.
As I fished my keys from my pocket, my phone rang. Cain is calling.
"Hey," I say.
"Hey," he breathed.
I was about to open the door to my apartment but instead, I locked the keys to my sweaty palm. Leaning my back on the door, I waited for his next words.
"Um, sorry, I just called to check on you. How are you?" He sounded nervous.
"It's not more than twenty-fours yet since I last step out of your home, chill. Haha," I laughed at how cute he acts.
"I'm just making sure, you know. Sorry, I was such a nuisance."
I rolled my eyes and bit my lip. Saying sorry all the time makes my ears itch.
"I'm fine, Cain. You don't have to worry."
"Thank God," he sighs in relief.
"Anyways, I had some pep talk with my teacher earlier."
"How'd it go?"
"It was weird crazy. She was broken, like I do. She tells me her story and how she moved on and that I needed to move on because there's a lot in store for me," I told him excitedly.
"Great. How did you feel after hearing about it?"
"Cain, stop sounding so therapeutic, haha. Of course, she's inspiring and I wanted to be like her."
"I believe you will. I believe you can, Lauren."
My lips curved into a smile, that's exactly the last words Mrs. Lopez told me.
"Reason number six, your teacher's famous words."
"Cain, gosh, how long are you gonna continue enumerating? I was kidding when I told you I needed ten reasons so I could move on. Forget it already, haha," I cackled but he was silent at the other line.
His reply seriously confused me and gave me rapid pulsation again, "Let's stop kidding, let's make it real from now on."