A/N: Lol once again it's a Quinx!reader bc I love the Quinx squad so much sorry
MAJOR TOKYO GHOUL:RE SPOILERS I SUGGEST YOU DON'T READ IT IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED THE MANGA
"What would you do if I died?" You wondered out loud as your boyfriend, Kuki, finished his paperwork.
His writing stopped and he lifted his head up to gain eye contact. "Don't even think about it." He warned. His voice didn't sound any different, but you were observant and learned how to read him like a book. He looked scared at the mere thought of your death.
You rose your hands in defence. "Woah, calm down, I'm just wondering, since we do already have our wills filled out and all."
He sighed and leaned his head on his hand. "I just don't want to think about it."
"Yeah, I can see that. Jeez." You huffed, trying your best to contain a smile.
Your best wasn't enough.
Urie gave you a questioning glance, and you chuckled. "Hey, I'm not as dumb as you think! I learned to read you like a book, Urie Kuki!"
He let out a huff of air and went back to finishing the last of his paperwork. Your gaze didn't leave his form for a minute, thoroughly enjoying watching him write. You loved how when he was this engulfed in his work, his facial expressions became more apparent and his eyes let through a new set of emotions.
You sighed. "How are you such a masterpiece?" You asked, your voice overflowing with affection.
For the second time tonight, Kuki gave you a surprised glance. "Where's your filter?" He asked.
"I never had one to begin with." You answered smugly. "But really. I can't believe I get to be with someone like you. It's crazy. My parents would've been proud." Your smug smirk turned into a sad smile at the thought of your late parents, who had perished at the hands of a ghoul during combat (one of the many things you had in common with Urie).
"Stop it. You're making me blush." He said sarcastically and pushed the small mountain of papers away from him.
"You done?" You asked. Way to go, (Y/N), stating the obvious.
"No, I'm just procrastinating."
"Haha, very funny." You got up from the table you were sitting on and headed towards the kitchen. "You hungry? I could fix something up before we head to bed." You proposed, eyes searching through the fridge for good food.
Urie politely declined your offer stating that he would rather immediately go up to his room instead. You nodded as he placed a kiss on your forehead and left. Even if the gesture was small, it meant so much more when it came from Urie Kuki himself.
As soon as Urie was out of (Quinx) earshot, you sighed. "That boy is gonna be the death of me..."
••••
"(Y/N)?" A voice asked.
"Ah!" You jumped up at the sudden noise, all thoughts of entering the Chateau stealthily gone out the window. "Who's there?!" You asked, on edge.
"It's Kuki." The now recognizable voice calmly said. You heard the sound of pressure being taken off the couch cushion and footsteps coming your way. "Where were you all night long? You should have told someone of your whereabouts! Going on solo hunts is really risky." His hands landed on your shoulders and a warm smile made its way onto your face. You loved seeing this hidden side of him.
"Sorry, I was with a friend." You cringed at how suspicious that could sound if he knew what you knew. "I didn't go after ghouls- and you're the one to talk! Mister 'I'll have my credits on my own don't bother me'!" You put your hands on your hip in a scolding manner.
"I don't care if I sound hypocritical. I had no idea where you went. It-"
"Scared you?" You answered. "I was fine, Kuki. I'm not like that. If I were to go after a ghoul, I would have dragged you along as back up- or more like to be your back up. What ever. You know what I mean."
You rose your hand and blindly tried to cup his cheek. After accidentally stroking his hair and cupping his ear, your hand finally landed on his cheek. "I won't leave you."
Your insides twisted at the soon-to-be lie.
"I love you." Kuki bluntly said.
Your breath hitched. In over seven months of being together, it was the first time he'd ever said it. Those three words that made your insides melt and your heart infinitely expand. You never knew he had it in him.
Stroking his cheekbone with your hand, you leaned in to where you calculated was his lips.
"I love you too, Kuki."
"A bit lower. That's my nose."
"O-oh! Sorry, I can't see shi-"
"Just let me do it." With that, he successfully managed to connect his lips to yours, skillfully brushing them together as your arms wrapped around his neck to pull him closer to you.
The closer the two of you became, the more passionate the kiss was. Once your body fully moulded to his, his hands were firmly pressed on your back, attempting to draw you in even more as yours tugged at his hair.
Before the two of you got carried away even more, you pulled away, heavily panting. The feel and taste of him didn't leave your lips and mouth.
"I really want to keep going, I do, but..." I've got huge plans to think of, "I really need to sleep."
"Okay." Urie answered, his own panting sending shivers down your spine.
Letting go of him, you stepped back and felt his hands squeezing your back once more before fully releasing you. "Sorry." You said, and smirked. "I probably got you all worked up, right?"
"(Y/N)..." He warned.
"Hope you can take care of it on your own!" You called out before quickly heading upstairs to your bedroom. "Love you!"
••••
"Is everyone okay?" Sasaki asked, looking over his squad, checking the Quinx off his list.
Shirazu, check.
Yonebayashi, check.
Mutsuki, check.
Urie, check.
(L/N), ch-
"Where's (L/N)?" Haise asked worriedly, looking around the perimeter. It's not like he could easily spot you. You has decided to wear the same white coat as all the other investigators in the small-scale operation.
"Dunno, I haven't seen her in a while. Maybe she's just with Akira-san or something." Shirazu proposed, also looking for your head of (H/C) hair. "Urie, where is she?"
Panic seemed to fill him from bottom to top. He hadn't seen you since you left his side to go help out Saiko, from what you said.
The male took a subtle deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart down. You're too good to die in something like this. Too skilled, too. You'd tackle him to the ground in a matter of seconds like you always did, right?
Yet, he couldn't shake off the unsettling thoughts in his head...
No. You said you wouldn't leave him, and he took the promise to heart. You'd be fine.
"Sasaki! Have you seen (Y/N)?" Akira approached the worried group, all eyes on her. Seeing as you were no where near her, Urie's panic increased tenfold.
"We- we thought she was with you!" Haise said truthfully, still looking around. "They haven't seen her since-"
"Rank 1 Sasaki!" An investigator approached the Quinx Squad, clutching a ripped and bloodied white jacket in his hand. "We linked this to be Rank 2 (L/N) (Y/N)'s coat. We couldn't find anything else, but if she doesn't show up within 72 hours..."
Haise nodded and took the bloodied cloth from the investigator's hand, and dismissed him.
Urie's gaze seemed to be dead set on his lover's belonging, tightly clutched in his mentor's hands. His breath became unsteady as the dreadful truth settled down on him.
If you didn't show up in the next three days, chances are you were dead, kidnapped and eaten by a ghoul.
••••
The clock on the wall struck 1:37 AM, meaning it had been exactly 72 hours since that investigator handed Sasaki your CCG coat. Urie sat still on the couch, his unfaltering stare on the door. You'd come back. You had to. You'll just open the door, tip toeing inside and apologizing for being so late since you were with that friend of yours again.
None of that happened.
He didn't get to watch you jump as he called out your name in the darkness.
He didn't get to scold you about your safety and how you scared him.
He didn't get to remind you once again about how much he loves you.
He didn't get to kiss you and show you how far his love for you went.
Before he knew it, his eyes were brimming with tears, and he frantically tried to wipe them off. If-
No.
When you came home, you couldn't see how much this has affected him. He didn't want you to feel bad for him.
"Urie?" Sasaki's voice made him freeze. "How long has it been since you last slept?" His concerned tone annoyed the boy. If only it were you worrying about him...
After three minutes of unbearable silence, Kuki finally answered. "96 hours and-" he glanced at the clock. "Five minutes."
Sasaki sighed. "I'm really sorry, Urie. We're all sad, but by now... She won't come back all on her own..."
His heart broke just a little more. Remaining still on the sofa, he refused to get up or even look at his superior.
"She'll come back. (Y/N) wouldn't leave like this without a good reason. Nothing could stop her from coming back if she set her mind and heart on it." His voice was cold and threatening, efficiently discouraging his mentor.
Without another peep, Haise returned to his room, leaving the heartbroken Urie with his antics. He'll sleep at some point.
••••
Life on the ghoul's side was... Actually rather peaceful?
Since a ghoul named Touka Kirishima 'accidentally' showed you the struggle most pacifist ghouls went through, you couldn't bear seeing them like that. So, in an attempt to help, you faked your death and vowed to protect all innocent ghouls out there.
It hurt to leave behind your friends, and even now, your heart still ached for Urie, who you just left in the dust with no explication. He would be so pissed if he knew what was up...
Yet, throughout your journey, you met a lot of ghouls who you now considered your friends. As much as your heart hurt, as much as you thought of backtracking, you didn't regret your choice. You knew that soon, peace would be fulfilled in Tokyo, for both humans and ghouls alike.
"You think this is really gonna work?" You hesitantly asked Touka as she watched Marude give orders to everyone willing to help Haise- Kaneki? What ever his name was, now.
"It's the only plan we got, and it's working." She answered.
"Yeah, but what about after this whole mess? Won't they just slaughter us all?" You anxiously glanced around, praying no one would recognize you. Being in a CCG building again was very uncomfortable.
"I'm still working on that part of the plan." She admitted.
You sighed. "Well, as Shuu said... As long as we get to see Kaneki happy, it'll be worth it."
You still couldn't believe that out of everyone, the one guy who said out loud that he wanted to see his friend happy was Tsukiyama Shuu, aka the ghoul who's been trying to eat him for ever, from what you heard. Nonetheless you were happy to see that he cared deeply for the boy.
••••
To avoid any familiar faces, you spent most of the operation with Nishino Kimi, trying to break down the logic behind this whole disaster. Sure, it seemed pretty cowardly from you, but you didn't want anyone not being at their 100% during the dangerous operation because you just came back from the dead.
Sure, Amon did it and everything was fine, but you still had your doubts.
Once it had been confirmed that the Oviduct producing the ROS inducing bastards was down, you decided to celebrate your victory with your friends, completely forgetting about the risks of showing your face.
"There's the brain behind the operation!" Tsukiyama smirked, opening his arms. You smiled and leapt into them.
"We're that much closer to finishing this!" You said, pressing your face against his chest. "How's Kaneki?"
"He should be fine," Nishiki said. "He's knocked out, but he'll pull through."
You nodded. "Thank god. I don't know what the world would be like right now without him. I think he just started a new peaceful era between ghouls and humans."
"Hm, a little miracle, isn't he?" Tsukiyama agreed, burying his face into your hair. You were used to his creepy antics by now.
"Are... Are you two a thing?" Nishiki asked, obviously disgusted.
"No, he probably just really likes how I smell." You answered as Shuu gave you a hum confirming your theory was right. "I thought you were smart enough to kno-"
"(Y/N)?" Your heart skipped a beat. "Is that you?"
You tensed up in Shuu's embrace, and the ghoul definitely felt it.
He hesitantly let you go, allowing you to turn towards the all too familiar voice.
"What... How..." Urie seemed mortified.
You nervously chuckled, your eyes never leaving his. "Hi, Kuki..."
"I'll just... Leave." Nishiki started walking away, and when he noticed a certain gourmet wasn't quite getting his hints, he loudly clear his throat. "We'll just leave."
"Ah, right, right." With that, the two ghouls left you alone with your... Could you still call him your boyfriend? After all this time..?
"I'm so-"
"Don't even finish that. You left me. Sorry's not gonna cut it." For the first time in forever, you couldn't see the emotions behind his cold eyes. Whatever happiness you had while hugging Shuu was completely gone.
"I..."
"Do you know how worried I was? Did you even care? What, you left me to join ghouls? Really (Y/N)?"
"Kuki, they were miserable, I had to do something!"
"So you left me thinking you were dead?! I mourned you! We all did! I finally thought I was able to let go, and you suddenly pop back up like none of that mattered?!"
"Urie, I had to go. I wanted to help them! Some of them are better than most of us humans! I had to make one hell of a choice, Kuki. Leaving the Quinx was the toughest decision in my life..." You attempted to approach him but stopped once you felt his cold glare. "There's not a day that I didn't think about backtracking, but... I was too scared..."
The two of you remained silent. You stared into his eyes, tears threatening to spill as he glared back, back straight and shoulders squared. He looked so composed, and you wondered if it really was the case inside, too...
"We searched for your body for months." He stated. "Shirazu and I went all around Tokyo trying to just find the smallest clue. Your departure broke me, (Y/N), and after..." He trailed off, glancing at the ground.
"After what, Urie?" You asked.
He took a deep breath. "After Shirazu died, I..."
You felt your stomach drop. "What..?"
He looked back at you, grief obvious in his eyes. "Shirazu... He got killed during the Rose Operation..."
The Rose Operation...
It was familiar. That was where Shuu had nearly died, wasn't it? That was when you, Yomo, Touka, Hori and Mr. Tsukiyama had saved him.
If it weren't for his servant, Kanae...
You really owed her everything...
"You can't be serious..." You breathed. "Shirazu can't die... He's... He's... He just can't die!"
Urie said nothing, while your brain started to overthink.
"If I didn't leave, maybe he'd still be..." You let out a sob. "Oh, God..!" Covering your mouth, you began crying, the unbearable pain and grief you had given to your friends began to dawn upon you. "I can't believe I... I'm so sorry! I could have done something..!"
Seeing you like this shredded his heart into even tinier pieces.
Urie hesitantly stepped towards you, wondering if he should really forgive you this quickly. After all, what you did was truly a horrible thing, but... If the boy had one weakness, it was watching the people he loved hurt so much.
You felt a pair of arms wrap around you and sobbed louder at the familiarity of the hug, leaning into Kuki's chest, clutching his shirt and muttering countless apologies when you weren't wailing and sobbing too loudly.
••••
Urie's hand clutched to the back of your shirt as your sobs turned into whimpers. Once you had calmed down, he spoke up.
"I'm sorry for making you feel like this..."
You chuckled and wiped the tears from your face. "I deserve it for all the awful stuff I did."
"Bullshit. You were just trying to do the right thing."
You leaned away from his chest, a questioning look in your (e/c) orbs. "Where did the Kuki from seven minutes ago run off to?"
"I... I wasn't thinking right."
"I'm still glad you vented a bit. Knowing you, you probably kept those emotions pent up... That's not good for you, Kuki." Your worried tone made the smallest smile appear on his face.
"I missed you so much." He whispered as he cradled your head to his chest, placing a soft kiss on the top of your head. "Don't leave me. I'm serious this time."
"I promise. You can even cuff me to you if you want."
Kuki chuckled.
"I didn't mean something like that!" You yelled, lightly hitting his chest.