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that weekend was overall tense. even though kihyun had pushed away the topic of her overstaying at work, he still was quiet most of the weekend.
they had dinner with his parents on saturday and he chose to not talk a lot, instead he went out to the balcony with his dad and drank soju there while his mother and sister stayed with soon inside, drinking tea.
sunday had been practically the same. he spent the whole day reading and resting while soon decided to bake some cookies and watch a movie that she invited him to watch as well but he refused, excusing himself and going to sleep early.
it seemed like he was upset about the previous subject even if he said he didn't want to talk about it anymore.
for soon's fortune, monday was there already and she felt slightly relieved since she was going back to work again.
she thought that maybe after those first days, she could manage to get back on tracks in terms of her relationship with her fiancé.
maybe he'd change his mind and maybe she'd comply and she'd start leaving a reasonable hour, just to avoid any weird situation with him.
that morning she decided to take some cookies with her to give some to kyunji and to the patients that day.
kyunji seemed overly excited about tasting them and once she did it, she complimented them greatly. "they taste slightly similar to my grandma's cookies... must be a similar recipe." she said with a wide smile on her face.
it made soon happy to see others happy. it didn't matter if it was over a cookie or over a treatment or a progress in a therapy session. she just loved helping people, as much as she could.
"your first patient is here." kyunji said.
soon nodded. "send him in." kyunji left the room and a few seconds later, hoseok walked in, followed by the patient.
"good morning dr. park." he said taking the patient to the couch.
"good morning boys." she said smiling. hoseok nodded and left the room, closing the door behind him, as usual.
"minhyuk-ssi... how are you this morning?"
minhyuk glanced at her with bored eyes. "i am not sure." he said shrugging, his eyes fixed at a lost point towards the window.
"why is that?"
"i feel weird lately..." he admitted, still not looking at soon.
she fixed her eyes on him, examining all of his body language. he seemed weirdly relaxed. not like previous sessions. he was always hyper, somehow moving his legs non-stop and his eyes were always looking at random spots inside the room.
his behavior had always been extreme, he was a hard patient that several times had to be sedated but that morning he was acting extremely strange.
"did the nurses give you some medication this morning?" she asked but it didn't seem like he understood the question. his visible frown was a clear sign of confusion.
she chose to ask that to hoseok later and changed the subject instead. "do you want to try my cookies?" she asked.
his eyes widened for a second as he slowly turned his head to look at her. she pointed at the jar of cookies right on top of the coffee table that was between them.
he swallowed hard and sat straight. "are those chocolate chip cookies?"
soon nodded. "made by you dr. park?" she nodded again.
suddenly his strange or maybe his usual behavior returned. he started sweating and his fingers trembled slightly. "are you okay? do you want to try one?"
she knew minhyuk had trouble eating sweets of any kind. soon thought it was probably a childhood trauma that he always refused to talk about.
of course, she would have made much more progress if she knew what happened exactly but he always either passes out or goes crazy whenever she tries to get that info from him.
"aren't those your favorites? or at least that's what i remember you told me years ago."
he swallowed hard again, glancing nervously at the cookies. "i can't remember the taste of them if i am honest dr. park."
she tilted her head. "well... you can try them again."
he looked at her, his eyes wide opened, like a child's eyes, unsure and innocent. "i promise they're good. i baked them myself." she said leaning over and opening the jar of cookies.
the sweet smell of the vanilla, mixed with the butter and chocolate impregnated the room.
he closed his eyes as he inhaled the sweet aroma. he then opened his eyes and looked straight to the jar. "maybe.... just one." he said nodding.
soon nodded as well as she grabbed the jar and pushed it slowly towards him.
minhyuk hesitantly took a hand towards the jar, in slow motion, taking his time and doubting on the way.
soon noticed even if he was open to try sweets now and then, he still had some doubts and this was an indicator that he still had trouble with it.
"i can't." he said withdrawing his hand, taking it to his chest and hugging himself.
soon stared at him with confusion as he started sort-of-crying. he shook his head as he lifted his feet to the couch, hugging his knees. "i can't., i am sorry dr. park." he said repeatedly.
soon quickly closed the jar and put it away. "it's okay... maybe you can try other day, does that sound good?"
he looked at her with big glassy eyes and nodded. "alright. i'll bake next month, we can try then."
"thank you." he said. soon just smiled.
"may i ask though... why can't you try them? is it because you don't trust my baking skills?"
she thought for a moment he'd laugh but the laugh never came. instead she noticed a single tear running down his cheeks.
when he realized he was crying, he quickly dried his tears with the sleeves of his white sweater.
"my mom wouldn't approve."
soon's eyes widened unconsciously when she heard those words.
it was the first time that minhyuk talked about something other than he couldn't eat because of the voices.
he had admitted that his mother wouldn't approve of him eating sweets. this supposed to be a big progress at least for minhyuk's medical records. "you mom? why is that?" she asked casually, trying not to overreact since she needed to get more information from him.
minhyuk just shrugged. "she doesn't like it... - he grimaced – you know... when i eat sweets."
soon frowned. "is it because some of them aren't healthy?"
he stared at her for a few seconds but then shook his head. "no..." he said between a sigh.
"then... why?" she asked curiously.
minhyuk looked down and shrugged. "she... she considers them not worthy."
"worthy of what?"
"to be eaten... by us?" he said as if it was obvious, but every word that minhyuk said made less and less sense to soon.
"how is that?"
minhyuk on his side, didn't seem to understand how dr. park couldn't see it. "sweets are for sinners dr. park... we're not sinners so we're not supposed to eat them."
soon's eyes widened as she heard this revelation for the first time ever. since minhyuk was admitted into this clinic, she remembered how he was brought there by his uncles, sent by minhyuk's parents, and after he was admitted, those first weeks seemed to be unbearable for him and for the staff.
he'd pass out several times a week, whenever he smelled something sweet. he couldn't be in a room if someone was eating something sweet and often he refused to talk about his parents or family in general.
he also seemed to love spending time on the clinic's chapel and asked to be taken there plenty times during his free afternoons.
soon didn't have enough information but given his attitude towards something so trivial such as sweets and given the fact that he, for the first time today, revealed such thing, she thought she had at least some clues. clues that'd help her come up with a better scenario for him.
she just needed to know the whole thing, so she could help him. and this new revelation might the light that was missing in the dark path they were walking.
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after she examined three more patients, she took her free hour to lunch. still with minhyuk's revelation on her mind. she couldn't stop thinking about it.
he made her clear that he wouldn't eat sweets because of his mother wouldn't approve. for the first time, he didn't talk about the voices.
that's why when soon saw hoseok on the distance, as she returned from her lunch, she called his name.
"ah yes, dr. park? how can i help you?" he asked removing his black gloves. he, as usual, had a bright smile.
"it's nothing... really... i was just wondering – she said taking a loose strand of hair behind her ear – did you give patient lee something this morning?"
hoseok frowned as he didn't understand the question. "something as?"
"as... drugs? any kind? or maybe medications?"
hoseok frowned again but finally shook his head. "only his daily vitamins, nothing else, why? did he cause trouble again?"
soon's eyes widened. "no. no, of course not... it's just... he made some revelations today and he was slightly calmed or maybe not... but definitely not as aggressive as the other times."
hoseok narrowed his eyes. "what did he say?"
"he – she stared but soon shut her mouth – hoseok-ssi... you know that's confidential, i am sorry."
he pressed his lips together in a thin line and chuckled. "arasseo dr. park... just tell me if he starts behaving weird again, i'll put him in line. " he said walking towards the elevator. she just nodded.
knowing he hadn't been given any pills nor medication of any kind, only vitamins, meant that he was more docile and seemed more recovered. this could mean something positive and soon didn't want to celebrate but she had to, since he was not only behaving better but he was also opening about his past.
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soft knocks were heard inside soon's office. kyunji walked inside with a wide smile. "dr. park, patient chae is here."
soon stopped reading and glanced at her through her glasses. "it's not 4:00 p.m. yet." she said after realizing the time on the clock. kyunji nodded.
"i know... something about a group activity at 4:30... hyunwoo-ssi brought him earlier, can he come in?"
soon hesitated since she usually had this hour previous to his, to check on some stuff but since he was there already she couldn't reject him. "of course, send him in." she said closing the book and walking towards the chair.
as usual hyunwoo walked inside first and greeted her, he explained why hyungwon had to come earlier and there was no trouble from soon's side to see him at that hour.
"i'll be right behind the door." he said closing the door behind him.
soon glanced at hyungwon, who was looking at her intensely. "so how are you today hyungwon-ssi?" she asked getting her notebook ready for his notes.
he tilted his head and sighed. "a little bored dr. park."
soon frowned. "why is that?"
he shrugged. "day passed slow for me... i was particularly expecting this time of the day to come, but you know what they say when you expect something too much, the time passes slowly."
soon tilted her head. "you were expecting our therapy session?"
he just nodded. "may i ask why?"
"of course you may... the answer is... - he tilted his head, a smirk drawing on his full lips – i bet you expected me to say something like... "because of the smell of your hair." he said with a sarcastic tone.
soon realized this wasn't hyungwon again, but the new identity. "ah... you know about it too hyungwon-ssi... who told you that?"
his eyes widened slightly as he stared at her with intensity. "hyungwon's not here dr. park... not currently at least." he said glancing at the cookie jar.
"made by you, i assume." he added.
soon followed his eyes and nodded. "may i?" he asked pointing at the cookies.
"please." soon said pushing the jar towards him. he leaned down and grabbed a cookie, slowly taking it to his lips.
soon didn't understand why he'd eat a cookie in such a way. anyone could come to the conclusion that he was practically eating seductively in front of her. but she didn't want to believe such thing.
after he took a bite, he chew slowly and swallowed with gracefulness. "i didn't know you had a talent for baking dr. park."
"do you find them delicious?"
he nodded. "surprisingly, yes i do... - he ate the rest of the cookie and cleaned his lips, licking softly – i wonder what other talents do you posses under that façade of psychiatrist." he said smiling sarcastically to her.
soon removed on her chair as she held onto the pen. "are you interested in something in particular?"
he narrowed his eyes. "may i assume?"
"please, go ahead."
it seemed like he was hesitating but finally crossed his leg on top of the other and sighed. "i think... you're probably good at reading long texts... and genuinely interested in fictional books."
soon narrowed her eyes as she internally admitted those facts were true. "something else?" she asked.
"hmm... - he said, eyes narrowed – i think... that you are not good at sports."
again, another fact that was true. "well... i am surprised by you capacity of assuming things about people."
but he laughed, out loud. soon stopped talking and looked at him with curious eyes. "oh but i don't do these assumptions about people in general... i only do it with you dr. park."
she stared at him with cautious eyes and remained silent for a few seconds, trying to understand why he'd say such thing. "why?" she finally asked.
"well... you see... i don't find interesting the rest of the people in here... but, i do find you interesting." he freely admitted.
"why is that?" she asked tilting her head.
but he shrugged. "i don't think i have a specific reason for that dr. park... i just do." he said smiling.
she felt her temples throbbing at the creepy revelation. she didn't want to believe it was something weird.
a lot of patients could develop a bond with their assigned psychiatrists and some of them showed similar conducts. maybe hyungwon was one of them.
soon decided to push away the eerie feeling and continued the conversation. "do you have more assumptions that you'd like to share?"
he narrowed his eyes again, this time taking his hand under his chin, as if he was trying hard to see through her.
the intensity of his dark-almost black eyes, piercing through her soul was almost unbereable. "i think i see something else." he tilted his head.
"what is it?"
he smirked, glancing at the silver ring on her finger. "i think... you're not happy about your engagement dr. park."
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