Spencer is two and a half months pregnant
Spencer's POV
"Morning," I heard a familiar voice.
I opened my eyes slowly. Toby's face was just inches from mine, smiling. "Morning," I mumbled. "What time is it?"
"Ten," he laid a hand over my stomach.
"What?" My eyes widened. "Where's Hayden?"
"Relax," he chuckled. "Emily picked her up this morning. She will be back later."
I relaxed my head back into the pillow. "I can't believe I slept in that long. This baby makes me so tired." I laid my hand over his. "I hope that means he or she will sleep through the night."
"Doubt it," he shook his head. "Hayden was the worst. She was up two three times a night. And when I was alone..."
I couldn't help the pain that flashed across my face.
"I'm sorry," he apologized.
"Don't be," I laid my hand on his cheek. "I know it was hard when I was away. I just hate hearing that pain in your voice. I never want you to feel that again."
He took my hand and kissed it. "As long as you are alive, I won't."
"Just promise me... If anything happens to me. You'll take care of Hayden and this baby."
"Of course," he looked at me. "I did it before."
"I know. But you were also miserable. You need to learn to let go and move on if that happens again."
"Why are we talking about this?" He glared at me. "I just got you back."
"It's just... I saw how you were when we were broken up and I can't imagine what you were like when... Just promise me you'll find happiness."
"Stop," he leaned in and kissed me. "Don't talk like that. You are going to be here forever. Even if that means keeping you cooped up in this house forever."
I laughed, "I think I'd go crazy."
"I can live with that," he smiled. He kissed me again, longer this time. "I love you," he whispered. He said it all the time now. I think he was afraid. Afraid that everyday I walked out the door for work or to go to the grocery store that I wouldn't return. I hated seeing that fear in his eyes.
"I love you too."
"Can we watch some video's today?" I asked as I cooked scrabbled eggs.
"What video's?" He said looking through the newspaper.
"The one's of us. One's where I'm pregnant with Hayden. I want to see everything. Since I can't remember every detail, I want to be prepared for when I get closer to the end of this pregnancy." I grabbed two plates and served our breakfast.
"Sure. I'll go grab my laptop," he got up setting the paper back down.
I set our plates down at the coffee table in the living room, and grabbed a blanket off the couch. Toby came back with his laptop, plugging it in the TV. He came back to the couch putting his arm around me so I could cuddle into his side. He sorted through his files until we got to where Hayden entered our lives.
"You look so young," I whispered to him.
"I was young," he smiled. "We were young parents."
"You can't even tell I'm pregnant here. How far along was I?" I asked him.
"I believe you were like two maybe three months along. You didn't show until you were like five months. It made me very nervous," his eyes were glued to the screen.
"Why?" I looked at him.
"I thought our baby was going to come out skin and bones, because of how tiny you were. But once you hit five months you blew up like a balloon." His eyes were still glued to the screen.
I watched the way he watched me... The old me. "You're still in love with her aren't you?"
"Hmm?" He still looked at the screen.
"Her," I tilted my head to the screen.
"You?" He finally looked at me.
"No. Her," I pointed to the screen.
"They're the same person," he looked back to the screen.
"No they aren't. You can't take your eye's off of her. She's not me. I'm not her. And I never will be, no matter how hard I try." I looked at the screen with jealousy. She would always have his heart.
"Spencer." He looked at me. He didn't know what to say, because he knows I'm right.
The tears welled in my eyes. Even watching these videos I could tell a difference between us. The girl in the video was fearless.
"Hey," he wiped the tears from my cheeks. "That's not true."
"She's amazing," I whispered. "She knows who she is. Look at how she-"
"I'm looking at you and I see the same person," he looked into my eyes.
"But we're not."
"You are," he corrected me. "I think you've just been through so much in the last few years. And I think that would change anybody. I'm not the same person either. Look at me," he turned back to the screen.
He was right. There was something about him in the video that was different. All the worry in his face was gone. He looked so much happier. "You look happy," I gulped. "That's because she makes you happy."
"You make me happy," he turned my head towards him. "I just worry about you."
"Toby what if-"
"Shh," he pressed his lips to mine. "This baby is making your hormones go crazy," he laughed lightly. "The accident was the worst thing that ever happened to me. But I wouldn't change a thing now. Because we wouldn't be having this baby," he touched my stomach. "And I wouldn't get to know this Spencer. You are different. But everything that I loved about you before, is still the same."
I relaxed into his shoulder. "Did you video Hayden's birth?"
"Of course," he said against my hair.
"Can we watch it?" I asked.
"Oh boy," he sighed.
"What?" I turned my head to look at him.
"I'm just going to warn you... You were in a lot of pain. You nearly ripped my head off."
I laughed at the look in his eyes as they went back in time. "I want to see the birth of our child."
"Ok," he flipped open the file.
As we watched the beginnings of the long delivery process he told me stories of when I was pregnant. "You want to know how we got her going?"
I just nodded smiling.
"Well you were nine day's overdue and the doctors offered to induce you, but you insisted it happen naturally. Anyways... We were in the grocery store. You were complaining about how much your back and feet hurt. The whole way through the grocery store you whined and whined. I couldn't wait for you to go into labor because I was beginning to go crazy. We walked by the family bathrooms and shoved me in there with you. You forced me to have sex with you until you went into labor."
"Forced?" I raised my eyebrows at him.
"Yes," he smiled.
"I doubt you complained," I rolled my eyes.
"I normally wouldn't. But it was really hard with how big you were, I was afraid. And it was a public bathroom. I was afraid someone would hear us," he defended himself.
"Did it work?" I asked.
"Not at first. Later when we went home, and we had that picnic outside. It must have triggered something." He smiled at me. "I'm very talented."
"Oh whatever," I smacked his chest. "I was nine days overdue."
"Fine, don't come complaining to me when you want Toby Jr. out," he glared at me.
"Toby Jr.?" I snorted. "There is no way I'm naming my son Toby Jr."
"I like it," he leaned down to my stomach. "Toby Jr." he whispered before kissing my stomach.
"He will not be named Toby Jr.," I shook my head. "What if it's a girl?"
"Spencer Jr.?" He looked at me.
"No," I shook my head. "Thank goodness I was conscious when Hayden was born."
"Actually I was the one who found the name," he looked at me.
"Really?" I raised my eyebrow. "Impressive, Mr. Cavanaugh."
"Speaking of," his lips inches from mine. "When are you going to change your last name back to Cavanaugh."
"As soon as I can. I don't want to be associated with the Hastings name anymore," I smiled at him. "Cavanaugh is much better."