Remy's POV
Watching Aria all day, the worry I have for my girlfriend only grows more and more.
She struggled to get out of bed today, so tired that her body struggled to wake up fully. I tried to help her in some way by at least having her coffee ready for when she was dressed. She seemed a bit more her self after a coffee and breakfast, but you could see how exhausted she way.
The dark bags starting to form under her eyes, her skin starting to lose the healthy glow she'd gotten since living in this place, not to mention the amount of times she has fallen asleep on the couch were all signs of how much she was stretching herself.
I care about her so much, and it is killing me that all I can do is help her with little things. Making her a coffee or making sure she eats and is in her bed at night isn't enough though.
Seeing the person you love draining herself...
Love?
How can I love her already? I can't, can I?
Shit, I think I do. She always makes me happy, even if we're just on the couch enjoying a movie. I feel like I can tell her anything, and I have with some of our deeper conversations. Don't even start with how much I'm physically attracted to her, though I know that side of things will be slower between us.
I think the one way I know it's love is because just being around her sends my heart racing, making a happy, giddy feeling flow through my being.
I certainly don't take just anyone to the sights of Melbourne, it was always just so I could see her smile.
Now we're getting to the end of our work day, which thankfully hasn't been too busy. Chris has already told me that he doesn't need me to stay back tonight, knowing that I've been eyeing Aria most of the day. We've spoken about the fact that I'm dating her, promising that it won't affect work. But even he can see how she is looking so exhausted, telling me to look after her at home.
"You ready?" She pops up in front of my face.
Realising I've been staring at her now empty chair, I give her a sheepish smile.
"Yeah, let's go home." I smile down at her, wrapping my arm around her waist as we bid goodbye to Chris for the night.
The walk in the frosty air is in comfortable silence, the two of us clinging as close to each other as possible so we enjoy the warmth emitting from one another. Stopping by Nando's on the way back, I try thinking about how I can go about talking to her. I don't want her to think I'm being a control freak, I just want to be able to help her so she's okay juggling everything.
After dinner, we end up cuddled on the couch as we binge watch Brooklyn Nine Nine. It took a fair amount of convincing to have her take a night off her TAFE work to wind down, though I think I made things worse. I was hoping a night off here and there would help her recover, but she just seems annoyed with me instead.
I really don't know what I'm doing here.
"Ari, if you really want to do TAFE stuff then go ahead. I wasn't trying to force you if you are that against it." I sigh, feeling like an asshole holding her hostage.
"Okay." She simply says, getting up to go grab the books she uses at the computer.
"I'm worried about you." I say, hoping she can at least see how much she's driving herself into the ground.
"You don't need to be, Remy. I told you that TAFE and work comes first, you said you understood." She huffs, feeling a shot at my heart with her throwing my words back at me.
"I do, but it doesn't mean I can't worry about my girlfriend. You just took on even more things to do after your chat with Marcus, but if you can't find a balance you're going to snap." I say, pleading for her to understand.
"You had no problem with it yesterday! Why are you suddenly so worried? I know I don't feel like watching TV with you tonight, but surely that isn't such a big deal that you need to start all this nonsense!" She says, with her voice raising as she continues.
This wasn't supposed to happen.
Has it really been so long since I dated that I don't know what's my business and what's not?
"I'm not being like this because of TV time, Ari. I'm worried that your going to crash sooner or later. You work, do your TAFE work as late as you can before dragging yourself to bed. Now you have to write a speech for Saturday along with everything else. I want to help, but making sure you eat and have a coffee isn't enough."
"So, what do you suggest I do then? Since you have a solution to it all." She snaps, making me flinch.
I want to just take it all back and walk away, but if I do she'll keep going how she has been and her health will suffer for it.
"I just want you to think about how much time you dedicate to everything. You must be weeks ahead in your course, and Chris said he didn't mind it taking the two years it's supposed to take. You once said your course had an outline to help with time frames for work, why not start using it so you can have days off too?" I say, hope flowing through my system as I watch her thinking.
Even looking drained and tired, she's so beautiful. I don't mind that we don't spend a lot of time together, but I can't let the woman I love slowly kill herself either.
"Well, maybe that's the answer to my problems. Perhaps I need to stop dedicating time to you, since apparently I don't have the time." She fumes after her thoughts seem to come to a horrible conclusion.
"Wh-What?" I breathe out, stunned by her words.
Too late, I hear the front door slam shut with force enough to vibrate through the apartment.
Feeling like my heart just got thrown against the wall, I trudge to my room feeling defeated. I decide to leave it for tonight, having done enough damage.
I'm pretty sure I might have lost my girlfriend though.
What the hell did I just do?