"She wears her painful present like wings- she has been going through hell and yet no one knows because she hides too well"
-Atticus (modified)
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I JUST WANT TO LEAVE. Run away even.
Click.
Anywhere but home at night. Anywhere but with my dad.
Click.
Why did I choose to sit in the back today?
Click.
Right on the day, the football captain decided to show up for class.
"Can you please stop tapping your pen on the table?" I turn around just to meet Brett Michelson's typical egocentric smirk. His plain light brown eyes flicker with delight at my annoyance.
In a million years, I never thought I would have the courage to complain about something to anyone.
Good girl. It's what they say about me. But I'm tired of it.
"What? Goody two-shoes is finally annoyed?" His voice is low, mocking me. This guy.
He has been bothering me since the junior year when I decided to try out for cheerleading. Let's just say it didn't go so well and now he bothers me with every chance he has. If I had written down the people I hate the most, he would be the first one.
Brett is also the one who makes fun of Eric. He is the bully that hurts my best friend when he has nothing to do.
All I do is roll my eyes and breathe in and out while laughter fills the air of the classroom.
The jock and his friends take the lead and everyone just rolls with it, but there is someone who doesn't laugh at all.
Kayla Stone. I always forget she is in my class.
She watches me carefully before she rolls her eyes, disagreeing with Brett. And he totally deserves it. I mentally thank her for that if she could only hear it.
Mrs. Easton doesn't lecture the jock or anything. She just shushes everyone and goes back to teaching Algebra 2. What a great teacher.
This is a class I like despite everyone complaining about how boring it is. But today I don't want to learn anything new about inequations or meet my dad's expectations of high grades.
I was almost late for today's second class. But my father would really hit me if I did.
After Eric's breakdown in the boy's bathroom, Bella took him to his class while I ran for life so I didn't get detention. And thank god no one noticed or walked in while my best friend and I were there or we would have gotten in a lot of trouble.
I managed to be on time for English Literature, but not before I received the whole speech of how brilliant I was and why there shouldn't be a second chance for lateness from Ms. Potter.
Now I'm here, in the last class of the day, wishing that I could get out. To just disappear in thin air.
My mind is filled with ideas on how to save my brother. It's something I have been thinking about for quite some time but just now I have this urge to take him out of our once happy house.
I look at the clock, completely ignoring what Mrs. Easton is saying.
Two minutes and then I'm out.
Deep breaths, Lina.
Only one now.
"That's it for now, guys. See you Monday for the test about the inequations we saw today," my teacher says, managing to make everyone groan.
What a great weekend. Spend it studying when I could be playing with Sammy.
The bell rings and in a matter of seconds, I grab my backpack and head to the door, taking my cell phone out of my jeans pocket to tell my friends that I can't see them after class today.
I text them on our Snapchat group chat called The Powerpuff Girls, managing not to bump into anyone on my way to the parking lot. Can't wait for you two today, sorry. But I need to go somewhere.
Eric is the one who chose the name in my defense.
Ella quickly replies back. Alright, see you at the party then. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow morning. It sucks, I know.
I sigh at her message. She wants me to go to this party so badly when I don't really know if I should. Rolling my eyes is getting very frequent now.
Eric, the bestie: It's fine. I need to talk to my mom about my grades anyway. Busy afternoon.
I can't help but giggle at what he chose for his contact name. Good luck with that. I quickly texted before putting away my cell phone since I'm already next to my car.
The present I got from my parents on my sixteenth birthday. They said it would help me deal with more responsibilities. Now, if I had to depend on Tom to get around, I would probably stay home all the time.
My dad told me he would pick up Sammy after school, so I didn't have to worry but my heart still twisted when he said that. What if he ran away with my brother?
All I can trust is that he is calmer during the day, so he probably won't do anything crazy that could put Samuel's life in danger. Or let's just hope.
With so much worry and stress in my daily life, I go to the one and only place I feel at peace and maybe it can help me find a reasonable solution to my brother and I's situation.
My mom's grave.
Just when I enter Miss Daisy's Flower Shop, I'm greeted with the typical bell on the door and the smell of recently picked flowers. The ones I'm here for.
"Hi dear, how are you?" Miss Daisy asks me, her caring voice welcoming me to the place I've visited the most this past year. I just smile because I know if I talk about the slightest part of my feelings, I will break.
She gives me a sad and understanding smile back from the balcony before heading inside to grab my mom's favorite bouquet.
In the meantime, I keep looking around at the flower shop. It is so welcoming with flower vases on the floor and some hanging from the ceiling, stopping almost at my height.
I remember her telling me she created this flower shop when her husband passed away five years ago and how much he loved flowers. He was botanical and he always had the dream of opening a place where people could literally buy happiness. She told me they were a happy couple.
Miss Daisy comes back with a dozen jasmines, wrapped in a dark red bow.
"Is your father alright, honey? He hasn't come here for quite a while now," she asks me while typing on the register. A wave of flashbacks come, causing me to remember what my dad has been doing. I need something else to think of.
In the beginning, Tom used to come here every day and leave flowers on my mom's grave, crying when he got there. And sometimes, I came with him. We both used to pray and leave the flowers we got for her.
The only one who never got the chance to go to the cemetery was Samuel. We thought it would be better if he kept the good memories of his mom and not the sad ones that came from going to the cemetery.
My dad stopped coming after he started to drink and got aggressive with Sammy and I, but even on the hardest days, I come.
"He has been working a lot these past months," I lie flawlessly. That's something I know how to do now. It's bitter against my teeth but I'm used to it now. It's a flavor I've been feeling for over a year now.
My life is made of lies. I can't simply escape it.
"Alright then, sweetie," she says, her typical smile taking over her face and her warm chestnut eyes lighting up, showing how much she cares about me.
Miss Daisy doesn't need to know it's been days since my dad last went to work in the hospital.
I quickly give her ten dollars for the flowers, her movements with the register slow and calm.
When I first met Miss Daisy, I knew she would become almost like a mom to me. We sometimes talk for a few hours before I need to go home, but today is not the case.
I need to talk to her.
"See you soon?" She asks, taking my hand and putting her own on top. The warmth of it caressing my skin.
"I guess. Bye Miss Daisy." I whisper before heading towards the door, but not without looking back one more time and seeing her wave.
With a wave back and a sad smile on my lips, I leave and cross the street to the cemetery.
I walk slowly between the graves, the bright green grass appearing trampled along the way and the smell of recent roses on someone's grave reminding me of how fragile life is.
One second and you can lose everything.
"Hey Mommy," I say as I stand in front of her grave, her old flowers withering next to it. It's been a while since I have been here.
Most of the time, I don't cry because I know there is nothing I can do. I pretend to accept the fact that my mom is dead. But today, I don't try to hide my tears nor my sadness over what happened.
Just like a storm, I break, my tears floating down my face like rain and my knees collapsing on the ground like lightning bolts as I stare at where my mom is now laying.
Adriana Baker
Beloved mom and wife
A ray of sunshine took too soon
that will be forever missed.
1972-2017
I leave the new bouquet I got next to her grave, resting my back on the stone so I can talk to her and pretend she can answer.
My dark red sweater is already wet from the salty, fast tears that leave my eyes but I couldn't care less. I stay with my eyes closed for a while, just breathing deeply so I stop crying.
The slight wind hits my hair and I untie my messy bun, letting my wavy dark brown hair fall to my waist in cascades.
"I just want to be free. I want to take Samuel with me and never go back to that house. It is just a source of pain." I mumble, the inevitable pain on my chest. I don't have the guts to say out loud what my dad has been doing to us.
The cemetery feels strangely peaceful. Many people believe it's a creepy and scary place but I like being here, I like connecting with her somehow.
"What do I do, mommy? Please, give me a sign." I beg, hoping for some answers while tracing the letters carved on her gravestone.
The last tears vibrate across my cheek as I leave a kiss on my mom's grave, almost like a tradition now. I stand up and look down at it one more time before heading home.
"Bye, mom," I mumble, cleaning the remaining tears on my cheeks.
Just when I'm about to leave, I see a boy from afar nearly passing through the big black gate at the entrance.
He's walking with his head down in the direction to the south exit, his all-black outfit sending chills through my body.
I slowly walk closer to him, still keeping a safe distance. My heart is beating fast against my chest and I have no idea why. Practically, everyone is dead around here.
I try my best not to make any sound while stepping in the grass, following him to wherever he is going to. The boy tries to vanish into thin air like I've wanted to do many times by taking a different sidewalk, but before he manages to disappear, I get to see a glance at his face.
The air catches in the back of my throat for the millionth time this week.
It's Damien Stone.
Destiny or coincidence, call it what you want, but it had to be a sign. Just after I asked my mom for someone, the bad boy decides to show up.
Yet, even if he's my solution, the atmosphere that circles him is dense and dark. By looking at him, you can feel he's dead inside.
Like a ghost, Damien disappears and is nowhere to be seen, leaving me to wonder how will he help me and what was he doing here.
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{A/N: Hey Guys! How are you enjoying the story so far? Next chapter, you will get to see the party going on!! Excited?
Remember, feedback is always appreciated! Don't be scared to leave your thoughts because I LOVEEE to read them!!
If you enjoyed it, please fulfill the orange star below so you can help this book grow!
Love you all so much, Ally}