Fear of Being Forgotten, Ignored or Forgetting.
Stan's pov
I sat alone in my father's office staring at the horrifying painting, why was I so afraid of her? it's just a stupid painting! nothing else.. I sighed and stood up brushing my curls to the side, I walked towards the exit door and took one last glance at the painting and shut the door. I honestly hated being alone, it's been a week since we beat pennywise's pale ass and i'm not doing so good..
-timeskip-
I held the stuffed bird in my arms rocking back and forth gently on the long swing attatched to the tall tree, I didn't bother going back home yet. Besides, There isn't any family to greet me when I do anyways. The only real family I had were my friends but of course, they weren't there all the time..they weren't there when my father beat me or when my mother burnt me..
I honestly hated being alone, It made me feel like I was in danger. Not from something physical, something else even worse. I sighed as I felt my eyes sting and soon enough warm tears made them down my face, I was never enough for my parents. I was never enough for my friends!..
I turned the stuffed bird over revealing a small baby blue zipper on it's stomach. I've been ignoring that zipper for 18 years of my life, I opened it and took out a small bottle of Eddie's pills. I had stole them as a joke but forgot to return them, it was still filled to the brim. I knew they were placebos, or 'gazebos' as Eddie called them. I chuckled to myself, it was funny how he mistaken the word for a structure instead of a pill. I wiped the tears of my face and placed the bottle of pills back inside the stuffed bird, zipped the zipper close and stood up. Taking in the fresh air around me, I walked back home.
Your pov
I skipped down the stairs and placed one my white converse, I didn't bother eating breakfast. My friends were waiting for me out on my porch, I smiled as I closed the door.
"Where are we heading too?" Richie spoke up adjusting his glasses, "To Pop's, I heard they serve great burgers and fries.." Bill answered. Over the years the boys grew taller and cuter, Bill out grew his stutter and can speak properly. Ben and Beverly where nowhere to be found in this shithole, Mike was a succesful part time librarian, Richie? He spends his time in the bars doing stand up comedy whilst Eddie helped him in his show. And Stan? Oh boy, Puberty hit him like that bus did to Regina George. If he wasn't so secretive I'd probably fuck him then and there! I stood on my bike and rode to the new restaurant 'Pop's' with my gang...
Stan was always the good kid, did all his homework, always stayed out of trouble, never walked into fights, straight A's. He was perfect, He always stayed at the front of te class and always payed great attention to the teacher. As we entered a little bell rand ontop of the door, We walked up to a booth. I noticed a boy maybe in his teens in a gray beenie focused on his laptop typing like he's running out of time, Must be a due project..
We picked out a neat booth amd ordered our food and drinks, We shared laughs and gossips while waiting..
Your order:
I silently ate my cheezy fries while Richie went on saying how he wanted to get laid and how he was going to get laid, it was honestly hilarious. My eyes went on Stan though, he didn't look as happy as usual. He looked like every smile he mad was fake, something wasn't right..I know it seems cliché and all but how else am I gonna keep the plot going? Ahem..I frowned at his fake smile, it wasn't MY Stan's smile..It was just some poser's. After our meals we all said our goodbyes and went home, I couldn't sleep after thinking about Stan..the sun was already setting but I had to see him. I quickly got dressed and rode out on the empty streets on my bike, the wind hitting my face as I raced to see Stanley.
As I rode by the houses I noticed Stanley's window was open and the lights inside his room where off meaning he wasn't inside, I began to panic. Where could he be? Then it hit me-
FLASSHBACKKKK
[i know it isnt the right time to do this but all the eddheads now whats up 🤣🤣]
Your pov
I held Stanley's hand as he led me throught the forest and infront of a stone wall with vines, his face shown with a bright smile as he let go off my hand and climbed the wall once he reached the top he motioned for me to follow, I held up hand up and grabbed onto a hole in the wall doing the same with my foot, I repeated this until I could almost reach the top. I accidentally grabbed onto a vine and it snapped due to the weight of my body, luckily Stan caught my arm in time and I regained my balance and continued to climb and reached the top.
We both sat ontop of the wall on time and I noticed a scratch on my arm I winced at the sight, Stanley must've noticed because he took out his hankerchief and wrapped it around my wound. My face warmed up and I smiled at him, He gladly smiled back. He easily climbed back down on the other side of the wall, he must've been here numerous of other times. As I climbed down he held my waist so I wouldn't hurt myself again, infront of us was a plant and vine covered house. I stared in amazement, how did Stan even manage to find this place? I felt him grab a hold of my hand and drag me along the back of the house.
We were met faced to face with a large garden maze with a flower covered arch opening. He led me through it without a mistake and hesitation, he definitely has been here before. Before I could say anything My eyes caught a tall tree and a high swing hanging from two of its branches, The whole enviroment's aesthetic was beautifuly vintage and neat. Filled with flowers, fountains, lakes and trees. Along with some animals too, I sat on the wooden swing and held onto both of it's ropes taking in the sweet moment of this place.
I then felt a small push on my back, I looked behind me as Stanley gently pushed my seat causing me to swing softly. He continued doing this until I reached a tolerable amount of height, he then helped me slow down and out of the swing. I remember the warmth of his body as I hugged him, I remember the secrets we shared in the heat of the afternoon sitting on the flowery feilds in eachother's arms. Climbing up the tree house on one of the many trees in the field and sharing our first kisses there-
REEALITYYYYY
Your pov
At this point I was racing across the woods, my bike occasionaly jumping slightly due to the small rocks and branches I ran over.
I felt as if something bad was going to happen, something very bad. My anxiety was building up, rain started to pour down on me. When I finally made it on the stone wall, it was old and broken.
Covered in moss and vines, I reached up and climbed just like we used to. But my foot stepped on a piece of moss and I slipped falling to the foot of the 8 foot tall wall, I groaned as I stood up fighting the urge to wipe my soaked face. I continued to climb, I felt as if a life was at risk if I didn't hurry. I leaped onto the top grabbing onto the ledge of the mossy wall, earning a rather large scratch on my arm an amount of blood seeping through it.
Though my adrenaline was still rising so I didn't feel it at first, I climbed down the wall. Halfway of climbing I decided to jump down instead, bad idea. One of my feet landed sideways, and damn did it hurt like a mother fucker. I kept rushing though but once i've entered the garden maze..
"Shit.. I-I'm lost.." I choked out a sob, I looked around helplessly for a way out and in to the field. Nothing. I fell to my knees, I couldn't do this anymore. I can't make it to Stanley-
ANOTHERR FLAAASHBACKKK
Your pov
"Stanley, how are you so sure this is the way? Don't you get lost here..?" I held his hand tightly afraid to lose the track, "of course I get lost but I have a remembrance" he pointed at a small porcelain humming bird stuck on the hedge, I smiled and touched it gently. Stanley then continued to lead me out of the maze, after swinging and sharing secrets. He led me to an old vintage tree house, we climbed up and entered. I gently closed the door and hugged Stan, "thank you for showing me this place Stanley" I looked up at him and smiled.
"Its really no big deal" He sheepishly looked away, He looked back and leant closer, and closer..until I felt his soft lips on mine and his hand reached back to grab the back of my neck pulling me closer as I loosely tangled my fingers in his curly locks, we pulled away panting. We smiled and laughed like two dorks, I hugged him.
"Haha..I love you Stan.."-
REEALLITYYYY
Your pov
I took sharp turns and finally wiping my rain soaked face, I finally found it. A moss covered, breaking small porcelain humming bird. Cracks visible in each of the small crevases of the bird, the poor thing. Raindrops dripping on it's body, vines wrapped tightly around it. I stopped observing the porcelain toy and continued to run out of the maze and finally, into the field.
The tall mossy and viney, rain soaked tree caught my eye like it used to. Along with the long, viney, wooden swing attatched to two of it's branches. With a familiar boy sitting on the swing gently rocking back and forth, holding a small stuffed bird in his hands.
Author's pov
He was hurt and broken, he had thought that y/n had forgotten they're shared kiss, had ignored the fact he loved her, had left the memories of this place. His sanctuary.
Along with the stress of his abusive parents made his depression worse, he recieved mixed messages from them and his friends.
His shaking hand reached for the small baby blue zipper and opened it, reaching in for the stolen pills. He dropped the toy and attempted to open the bottle, "s-suh-stupid c-chuh-child proof c-caps.." a sob escaped from his lips as he attempted to open it again, only to succeed.
He dropped the cover and raised the open bottle to his lips, as he was about to leave the horrid planet he called a home, a shaking hand slapped the bottle put of his hand. The contents spilling on the wet soil, He looked up seeing the love of his risked life staring at him with fear and sadness. Tears falling down her fragile face in rhythym, her hair stringy and wet from the rain. He shakily stood up and hugged her for dear life, she hugged back faster than you could imagine.
She gripped him tightly, she was scared. Her gut was right, she imagined the scenarios that could've happened if she slowed down on her movement and didn't make it in time, what would've happened to Stan? It would be all her fault.
These thoughts made her sob uncontrollably, causing Stan to do the same. The boy couldn't believe he almost took his own life and risked never seeing his y/n again, it was a crazy thought but he almost did it. The two sat down on the wet grass sobbing to eachother, soon enough they calmed down and took shelter in the tree house they kissed in, The two were soon nothing but a ball of sniffling lovers in a tree house along a flowery field during sun rise.
Y/n refused to be seperated from Stanley, She was scared that this scenario would happen again. But Stanley assured her that it wouldn't and they would be together for life, And with that the two shared their second kiss in the same tree house, they once found.
A/n
This is the longest oneshot ive ever done, standing tall with 2190 words. Holy shit guys, im so proud of it,, hope ya'll read this one tho smh