Luke's POV*
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Oh my god.
What the fuck did I do...
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I paced around the small parameter of the room, tugging at the roots of my matted down hair. My eyes stung with tears that brimmed the surface, my knees were completely weak, and the acid in my stomach had surely raised in level, making me want to vomit at my own actions.
How could I do this to her? It was bad enough to cheat, now I fucking touched her?
I let out a low groan, pulling harder as the image of Khloe's face appeared; branded into my vision.
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The way her hair was disheveled. How her eyes grew the size of baseballs when she seen me step out of the room. The way she just instantly became a fountain of tears.
I scared her.
No. Terrified and tormented her.
"Make it stop." Those were the only words that were able to come out of my mouth as the tears started to cascade down my face.
What was I thinking? I took one of the most beautiful girls and destroyed her.
It's my fault. All of this, is my fault.
Niall was wrong, so wrong, when he said that I was just as bad as him.
The truth is, I am so much worse.
I've..I've lied, I've cheated, I've completely destroyed the world around me, I've violated a girl, I've gotten into fights.. Hell, I've done more messed up shit than I can count on my fingers.
I know that Niall's not the greatest person. He's no prince charming, no goodie-two-shoes. He's done a shit ton as well, but I do know that no matter how mad, irritated, or annoyed, he would never, ever go as far as to lay a hand on a woman.
I quickly brushed the tears away, standing up straighter. My heart was pounding against my ribs, as if it wanted to escape, as I quickly made my way to my closet. I pulled out all of the hangers that held my clothes, throwing them into my duffel bag.
I need to get out of here.
I need to leave.
I'm a coward, but I don't care. I do not wish to see what I have done to Khloe. I do not wish to know what she thinks of me, and I do not wish to see her crumble. I do not wish to know that I did that to her.
I was suddenly stopped by the sound of my door hitting the wall, making me turn my body.
The light from the hallway streamed in, causing Niall's silhouette to be seen.
I just sighed and stood there. My heart began to pound so loud that I couldn't hear the man in front of me, instead I just seen his mouth moving. That was until I watched his fist connect with my jaw, blurring my vision.
I deserved that.
I stumbled back from the bed, only to receive another which made my knees even more weak as I was pummeled in to the ground.
I deserved that too.
I didn't fight back, instead just let him, taking in each bone aching blow that smeared even more blood. I didn't need to fight back. I needed to know what it felt like to be helpless. As helpless as Khloe was. I deserved all of this.
My ears began to ring. My vision turned black. The only thing left of my body was a numb sensation that filled my nerves.
It was all my fault. I deserved this at the least.
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Khloe's POV*
The heat was felt against my cheek as I layed still with my eyes shut. I don't know how long I've been awake for, but it's been a while. Maybe a few hours even.
I could feel the bed shift slightly meaning Niall was still up as well. I don't think he's even went to sleep yet because the whole time I've been awake, so as he. A smile made its way onto my face as he began to lightly circle over my back with his nails.
From my shoulders to my neck, back to my shoulders, and then down my spine. It was a continuous pattern being made which only made me smile more.
Maybe I should get up? Or maybe I could lay here for a little longer, taking in the lingering light from the sun that was shown into the room through the white blinds. I decided on the second option, sitting silently as I faintly listened to Niall hum. It was the same tune that he'd sang in the shower that day, and the one that Liam had played on the guitar.
I don't know the name, or the lyrics and Niall won't tell me, but I wish he would. It's one that I would honestly just listen to all day. It was so mellow and beautiful.
He stopped and I felt him shift before the bed grew light on his side. I slowly turned my head, my hair falling in my face in the process. I scrunched the pillow underneath me, finally opening my eyes to get a good look at him.
It wasn't until after he had finished putting his jeans back on that he had noticed me. I had a funny feeling that started to become overwhelming as his eyes connected with mine. It wasn't a good one though. More like I was going to be sick.
"Sorry, Khloe. I didn't mean to wake you." He spoke quietly, scratching his neck.
"Oh, no. You didn't. I've been up for a while." I turned over and sat up, moving my hair out of the way. His shirt bunched up around my waist before I straightened it out with a sigh.
His face paled slightly, his cheeks becoming a faint pink. "Oh, um, okay. Would you like some breakfast? It's only seven thirty, no one's probably even up yet."
"Uh, no thanks. I don't feel very good." I swallowed, a sour taste finding its way into my saliva. "But you can go. I'll be down in a sec."
He nodded and shut the door behind him. Sighing, I lifted the covers off of my legs, before turning and swinging them off the bed. My feet came into contact with the cold, wooden floors, causing goosebumps to rise up my legs.
I caught sight of the skirt and shirt on the floor and it was like a flash of lightning hit as the memories from last night came rushing back, making my stomach churn.
Oh God.
I quickly stood up, making my way out of the room towards the bathroom. I didn't bother knocking on the door, instead I just flung it open, happy to see that it was all clear as I leaned over the toilet, letting whatever was in my stomach, empty.
Tears pricked at the corner of my eyes as I gagged, vomiting once more. I quickly wiped my mouth and flushed, leaning back to rest against the wall.
I could hear quick footsteps drawing closer, which means that either Niall heard me or someones awake. As much as I don't want Niall to see me like this, I really hope that everyone is still passed out. I'm not so much in the mood to talk to people and I know that as soon as they see me, they're going to start asking questions and expecting answers. I'm not ready for that.
The mop of messy blonde hair and blue eyes standing in the doorway answered that question. His black Ray bans covered his eyes and his lip was purple and a bit puffy, meaning that he probably got in a fight last night too. I mean, I wouldn't doubt it. I just shook my head, feeling more acid rise in my stomach.
"I'm leaving. Like, back to Australia. Just so you know."
That's it? Really? He fucking violated me!, and that is all I get? I shook my head again, tears falling once more. I'm so tired of crying.
He just stood there staring at me before he sighed and started to walk away, only to stop himself. "I'm so sorry, Khloe. There are not enough words on this planet to express how sorry I am. It was wrong, and disgusting, and I deserved every beating that Niall threw my way. Hell, I deserve more than that, but for now, I'll take it." He gave me one last glance before finally moving out of the way, closing the door behind him.
Every beating Niall threw his way? But Niall was with me last night.. right? When did he.. What? I swear to God, if he fucking did what I begged not to..
That fucking bastard!
I cleaned myself up quickly, rinsing my mouth with mouthwash quickly before exiting the small bathroom.
I could feel my heart beating erratically as I stormed down the stairs towards the kitchen.
Niall sat at the counter, back turned towards me as he messed with his phone, eating a bowl of cereal.
"You fucking bastard!" He jumped at my voice, turning around to look at me. "You said you wouldn't do it! I fucking begged you!" I could feel the tears prick at the corners of my eyes.
I feel like I have no trust in anyone anymore. I ask one simple thing and they can't even do that. I'm so confused anymore. I know that Niall was only giving Luke what he deserved at the least, but it's the fact that he promised he wouldn't do it while I was there, sleeping or not.
Niall quickly jumped from his seat, slowly walking towards me as I took a step back. "Don't. I told you that I couldn't take anymore! And you promised to leave it until after I was gone!"
"Hey, hey, hey." He backed me into a wall, pulling me into his arms. I quickly complied, wrapping my arms around his chest. I'm mad at him, but I'm not, but I am, and I don't even know what to think or do anymore!
I hate this. I like order, and right now, my brain is so out of order and I'm so confused.
Niall nuzzled his head in my neck, as he pulled me closer, rocking us on the balls of his feet. He ran his hand down my spine, comforting me. "Hey, what's really going on? This isn't you."
I let out a sob, pulling him even closer. I'm a fucking wreak, that's what's wrong. "I..I don't even know." I rested my ear against his chest, just listening to his calming heartbeat.
We sat in a calming silence for a few minutes as he continued to rock us, never once loosening his grip. My tears slowly started to stop and my body began to relax.
"I wasn't meaning to hurt you, Khlo. I wasn't meaning to upset you. I just couldn't get the thoughts out of my head. I'm sorry."
"I know." I stated, trying to relax my mind as Niall lightly ran his fingers through my hair and over my back. I glanced up and he looked down, taking one of his hands to my cheek as he swiped the tears off. I let out a sigh and closed my eyes, leaning into his touch. .
"Would you like to go back to your dorm today?" I opened my eyes again, as panic starting take over inside me. I lightly shook my head, putting it back on his shoulder. I still don't want to talk to Gemma or the other girls about it, and they'll be expecting me to. "I get it. I can't really stay here anymore though because of my restrictions, but you're..you're, um..welcome to come stay with, uh, Liam and I for as long as you want, I guess." His voice sounded strained, like he wasn't sure of what he was saying.
I sighed, thinking it over. "Does Liam know?"
"He only knows as much as you want him to." His voice was hushed, as if in fear that we'd wake the other forty bodies in the living room.
I nodded, running my own fingers over my red, puffy cheeks. I let out a chuckled, shaking my head. "I'm a mess. Mentally and physically."
Niall pulled away a little, looking down at me. "You look beautiful."
"Are you serious?" I laughed, rubbing my eyes once again. "I'm a confused bitch, I don't feel well, my hair is all over the place, I'm standing in the kitchen in nothing but underwear and a long t-shirt, and I'm crying over the fact of you wanting to help me. I'm a mess."
"Valid point." Niall laughed as I hit his arm. "I'm just kidding." He calmly stated, even though we both knew that I was right, rubbing my back again. I smiled, lightly tracing over the small black cross on the right side of his chest.
"I like this one." I mumbled as I continued to follow it.
"Yeah?" I nodded, looking up to see him smiling. "I think that's my favorite, too." I smiled back and pulled away from the hug before fixing the shirt. "Go get dressed and we'll head back, yeah?" I nodded, biting my lip at the though of having to put back on those clothes.
*
"Liam?" Niall yelled into his dorm as I entered behind him. I sighed, setting my backpack and a small bag that had a couple outfits in it on the floor next to the couch.
After we left the frat house, Niall decided it was best to stop at my dorm first to get my stuff while Gemma was still gone so that way we wouldn't have to do it later and have the possibility of running into her. I agreed, thinking that he was probably right, and I needed to change. So we did that, where I changed into a pair of grey sweats and a light blue John Mayer tour t-shirt, before coming here.
"Yeah?", Liam called back. He suddenly made an appearance, walking out of his room as Niall began speaking. His chestnut brown hair was pushed into a quiff and I could tell that he was starting to grow out his beard.
"Khlo's staying with us for a couple days. Don't ask questions, I was just letting you know." Niall stated, giving me a look from the corner of his eye.
I appreciate that Niall was trying to look out for me, but I really didn't care if Liam found out. I mean, he's been my only constant here this year. I trust him probably more than anyone else. He's not like the girls who will run around and spread gossip and rumors. He's not one of the guys who will laugh and make fun of me. He's... Liam.
"Uh, okay. Yeah, that's cool." He smiled at me and I gave a small one back. "Where are you going to sleep? You can have my room if you want, I don't mind taking the couch."
"She's sleeping in mine. So you can keep your damn room and sexual activities to yourself." Niall stated, in an annoyed tone. I couldn't help but to chuckle as Liam's cheeks turned pink.
"I am?" I muttered to Niall, with my eyebrows furrowed, and he replied with a 'Yes. No exceptions.'
"Yeah, says the sex hound, himself." Liam retaliated, causing me to burst out laughing and Niall to roll his eyes and walk into his room. "Anyways, Soph and I are going out for lunch today, so I'll be on my way. Khloe make yourself at home." He kissed the top of my head as he passed, but stopping himself in the doorway. "Oh, and Khlo?"
"Yeah?"
"Niall already knows the rules, but no sex on the dining room table.", He winked as I stared at him dumbfounded. "What? Don't think I didn't know it was you that I've caught him with before." My mind raced back to the night that I picked Niall up from Seth's. We were both half naked and making out when we had been caught by Liam who told us to shut the hell up because he was trying to sleep. Oh God.. I could feel my cheeks heat to about a hundred and ninety degrees as Liam smirked and shut the door, causing the walls to shake.
Hey guys! I am SO SO sorry that it took ke so long to update! I'm at my dad's and he doesn't like me being on my phone a lot so I didn't get a whole lot of time to write, but it's up now :)
And just a little clarification.. I've been getting questions about Khloe's hair color. Its a dark golden color and so she calls it dirty blonde and Niall calls it a light brown, some of you just haven't figured that out yet, but it's okay. haha
The beginning may have sounded choppy, too, but that was because it's supposed to be. They're Luke's thoughts for the most part.
Also, in this chapter Khloe gets upset with Niall but then hugs him tight when he pulls her to him. Khloe is very confused with herself. She doesn't know how to react to him. She wants to be mad at him for going behind her back, but she also wants to be comforted by him because she knows he's only doing what's best for her. Also, Luke has kind of screwed up her mind by doing what he did and you will see that in these up coming chapters. So be looking out :)
Have a nice night or morning or day or whatever! haha Love you guys! Xx