a/n: Firstly, THE HECK?! 82 views? Is there something wrong with my sight? gkhfegakshlkfdlkjda I'm so stunned. I don't even know how to thank you all for reading this anymore... TT Thank you so much!
Secondly, I would like to ask you a question that will most likely affect the plot: should I extend 'Chaos' or make a sequel? (because the prevailing ending and plot that I have, doesn't really explain Taehyung's view on things and the others' aftermath, which could be vastly poignant.)
Nevertheless, let's get on with the tale!
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It has been a week since the brunet's demise, and we are now witnessing the most panged member of the assemblage. He was gazing vacantly at the wall opposite his bed. Had not shower for the latter few days. Had not eaten for the preceding few days. Had not even tasted enough water, barely subsisting. It just made me question whether his existence was still sentient or not.
His eyes were desiccated from the relentless bawling of the past several days. Crying seemed to be a custom now, or even a part of living for the wakeful teenager. He was strained, both mentally and physically, desperately hoping for this all to be a dream. Hoping that the next time that he widens his eyes, the merry brunet would be there cuddling him, although he faced disappointment every solitary time.
He was on the threshold of dying, without his brunet, but the thought of the brunette was also saving him, each time he tried to end everything.
He desired to remain buoyant, but the actuality seemed to be beating him down every second, without the plan to.
With his dehydrated eyes, he looked for a pen, preparing himself for a full discharge soon. He sat on his once warmth occupied chair and began writing.
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Dear Taehyung,
Sometimes my life is a made chaos, a mayhem. And even myself, loathe it. So, how can you, a random someone that I met at the park, like me?
To be honest, I like your company, but I also despise it. Why? Why did you have to come into my life then ruin it. For the better.
I don't deserve your love nor care in any way, so why? Out of all the personage beyond this biosphere, did you choose me? Why would you choose a loner, a good for nothing junk, out of all the amazing people aside me?
I don't understand you, you are like an alien. Perhaps, you are one. But a strange, compassionate, unique alien, whereas I am just a pile of useless garbage left afore your doorstep.
Please abandon me like everyone else did, I pleaded but you declined. You stayed despite the fact that I was impractical and unsightly. I am not sure if you know this but my love for you never faded, since your trip to heaven. I bet you were thought as a gift when you ascended to heaven, Tae. Because you sure resemble one to me.
I wanted to thank you in person, but I won't be going to heaven, I will probably be unaccepted everywhere. No one relishes me but you, after all.
So, why? Why did you make my existence a living hell?
Don't come to me in the first place if you were leaving me!
Don't repeat your tedious phrase of 'I love you' every time you see me!
Don't confess to me then leave me!
Don't ask me out if you weren't going to fulfill your promise of 'I will stay by your side forever'!
Don't cook me food!
Don't build my hopes up if you were going to crush it!
Don't love me if you are going to part with me!
You should have just left me alone and overlook me.
Don't tell me 'forget about me' if you are dying because you know that I can't. No one can, no one.
Jung kook is mourning over you whilst Namjoon and the others don't talk anymore.
Because of you. Because of you: Tae. Billions of souls are crumbling slowly.
Please come back. Although it's not possible.
Please tell me 'I love you' one more time...
Please.
Tae.
Please.
If this is a prank, it is certainly not funny.
Please come out or else we will actually be mad at you.
Please come back, Tae.
Please come back, before your beloved group turn into a chaos. A mayhem.
All the best.
Jimin.
---
Afterthe scripting of this purposeless letter, Jimin wept, like all the othernights. For unequivocally no reason, he posted the letter, without the locationto send to and without his address, knowing that he would not want to see hisletter again, to remind him of his languid being. Then that nocturnal, He sniveledhimself ,without the desire to halt, unconscious.
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a/n: didn't proofread, as usual, I'm sorry... Anyways, here's chapter 5! Thanks for reading this and please continue to support 'Chaos' and please do check out my other tales! Please know that: your decision for either the extending/ sequel, will immensely impact on the tale and any comments will be read and cherished. Sorry in advance for the possibly will-be-delayed update for chapter 6, tests are slowly but surely drowning me and my typical encouraging family seem to be vexed with me because I spend time on writing stories... but I'll never stop! Never!
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Special thanks to the following for adding 'Chaos' into their reading list! (I really appreciates it, thank you very much!):
@noahhateslife
@fudanshiamantedelrap
@themilktae
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Once again, thanks for 82 views!
Have an amazing day/night! [cannot believe that I forgot to type this and my fade-out line in my last chapter... TmT]
Tired out!