When you ask me what’s wrong
I always say that I’m tired.
But you never ask, “of what?”
People always presume that I just didn’t sleep.
Well, actually, I didn’t sleep,
But it’s really not that simple.
I didn’t sleep because I was too busy
Thinking,and worrying, and wondering.
I am tired, but not ofconsciousness.
I’m tired of being ignored.
Of wanting to be more
Than just the smiling facein the background.
You see, my cheeks have begun to ache.
I’m afraid my smile will falter and they will see.
See that I’m tired of losing at the gamewe call life.
I always seem to be the one to fail
while others succeed;
The one denied while others are embraced.
I lay awake,
time but a rising number,
thinking of each timefate trampled me into the ground.
I stare into the night,
though seeing nothing,
worrying about what’s to come with each new sunrise.
I cry myself to sleep,
my eyes sore and heavy
wondering if I will ever simply be at peace.