I woke up instantly remembering the kiss. My cheeks burned and a smile appeared on my lips as I snuggled my face into the blanket all embarrassed. Did that really happen? Did I really kiss him? When did I even start liking him?
It hasn't even been twelve hours since I last saw him and yet, I was yearning to be beside him. And the fact he was in next apartment made my heart flutter. I wondered if he felt the same. Was he in his room waiting for me to wake up? Should I go and check? No! I couldn't seem like I was excited to see him. I should wait. He was probably still sleeping.
But when I closed my eyes, I imagined of the kiss. The way his arms felt around me, the way his lips touched mine. It felt surreal.
"Why are you smiling?" I heard.
I opened my eyes and found Mia staring at me with an expressionless face beside me. I screamed in startle, jumping up and felt myself tumble over the bed and onto the bed landing on the side of my hips. I groaned in pain and rubbed my hip.
"What's wrong with you?" Mia asked.
I averted my gaze to the floor and pressed my lips together. I know she didn't like Daniel, but I wanted to tell her. I needed to tell her.
"Daniel and I kissed," I said shyly.
"What?" Mia screamed.
My eyes widened and I jumped up, covering Mia's mouth with my hand.
"Shh! You'll wake up Dina and everyone else in the building," I snapped.
Mia pushed my hand away and blinked in disbelief. "You kissed Daniel? Why would you do that? Who kissed first? When did you kiss? Did you like it? How was it?" Mia asked, bombarding me with a thousand questions.
I cleared my throat, smiling shyly and sat on the bed. "We kissed last night and," I bit my bottom lip. "I kissed him first."
Mia's jaw dropped open. "You made the first move?"
"Well, he asked my permission first and I said yes, and then next thing you know I kissed him."
I told her everything. I told her about our trip in the morning to watch the sunrise, the swimming in the ocean and when we got back, the dancing in the rain. Mia was quiet the entire time, but she didn't look upset or happy. Did she think it was a mistake? Did she think Daniel was tricking me? No, how could I think that? He kissed me back.
"You guys kissed three times?" she asked.
"I don't know what to do when I face him. Should I pretend it didn't happen?"
Deep down, I hope she wouldn't tell me to forget it. Deep down, I didn't want to forget it. I wanted to walk into the room see Daniel waiting for me and kiss him again. I wanted to be near him. I wanted him to embrace me like the way he did yesterday. This was such a strange feeling, and I couldn't stop smiling. It felt like euphoria.
"Depends. Did you like the kiss?"
I didn't say anything. I just looked at my hand shyly and I felt like an idiot for being this shy. I shouldn't be shy about this. It was just Mia. It wasn't like I was talking to dad about it.
"Oh my god," Mia mumbled suddenly.
I frowned. "What?" I asked.
"You like Daniel! You like, like him. As in more than a friend like," Mia said it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I bet you even love him."
"Hold up," I raised a hand to her, "Like, yes. But love? No. I don't love him." At least, I don't think it was love. I never experience love before. I mean, I loved my dad and I loved Mia but that was a different kind of love. A love that someone has for a significant other was foreign to me. So, was this it? No, it couldn't be. Love had to be unambiguous. It was clear as day.
"Yet," Mia added with a cheeky grin. "Okay, back to your question. You walk out of here and just act casual. You find out whether he feels the same way about you and if he doesn't then pretend nothing ever happened. You need to figure out what you want as well, but just don't do anything too rash. Think through it and make sure you don't do anything you regret."
"What if he likes the kiss?" I asked hopeful.
Mia smiled like a proud mother hen. "Then you can take your relationship to the next level. It's probably best for you anyways—finally, you're moving on."
I nodded. I felt a sudden fear bubbling inside of me with a question repeating itself in my thoughts again and again. What if Daniel regretted it?
I was sitting at the table nearby the window, and I was staring at the empty balcony. It wasn't raining anymore. The sky was cloudless and bright blue like it hadn't been raining all night.
I picked at the handle of the mug and flicked my eyes back to the door that led to Daniel's room. When was he going to come out? As if they heard my thoughts, the door opened, and I snapped my head back to the window. My heart raced.
"Oh my God, how many times do I have to tell you?" I heard Mia yell. "Knock before coming in! Shish you're such a perv."
"Get of yourself," Daniel replied. He was here! "What's for breakfast?"
He walked straight towards me and took the seat across from me. He didn't even look at me but took my coffee and took a sip. Why wasn't he looking at me? Gosh, he regretted it.
Daniel peered over his shoulder towards Mia, and I followed his gaze. Mia had her back turned to us even though I could tell she was grinning. She was too busy preparing the eggs. No one else was in the room. It was just Daniel, Mia and me.
I turned to look back at Daniel and suddenly felt his lips on mine. The kiss was slow and delicate. But as quick as it came, he pulled back and sat down, taking another sip of the coffee. A small smile on his lip.
My heart squeezed. I resisted the urge to pull in for another kiss. I tried to hold back my smile as I looked away so no one could see me smiling like an idiot.
"So, what's the plan today?" Daniel asked, his voice loud enough for Mia to hear.
"I don't know. I guess whatever we all feel like doing," I answered.
Daniel finally looked at me with an arched brow. "Hang on. Did Elizabeth Scott really not make any plans today?" he mocked.
"Hardy har," I narrowed my eyes. "Says the one who pretty much planned the whole day yesterday."
"Okay, I don't mind planning today's events. I can guarantee it would be better than yesterdays," he winked.
My eyes widened and I looked away, coughing. What was he planning to do? Before I could retort, someone else entered the room and I exhaled, taking a bite from my cereal.
"Daniel, why are you always here?" Dina asked.
I snickered. She had a point. He was practically here every morning and every night just hanging out with us.
"Because you guys have the food," Daniel replied effortlessly.
I heard Mia scoff. "Suure," Mia mumbled under the breath as she placed the eggs on the plate without even looking at us.
Soon, Josh walked in and Mia's cheek blushed instantly. She stuttered a hello and Josh replied with a shy hello. And here Mia was giving me relationship advice when she still hasn't made it official with Josh.
"I made breakfast," Mia told him.
Josh grinned. "Looks delicious." It was just eggs and toast.
Mia, Dina and Josh each took a plate and moved to the dining table, joining me and Daniel. Soon, even Peter walked through the door sniffing out the food like a dog. Why did they have to share a door with us? Although, I wasn't exactly complaining. I kept sneaking glances towards Daniel, and he was doing the exact same. I tried so hard not to grin like a psychopath. Why did he make me feel so many butterflies?
Next minute, Kyle entered the room and my heart stopped.
"Morning all," Kyle greeted cheerfully.
Oh, my God. I completely forgot about Kyle. I looked at Daniel and it was like the same thing dawned on him as well. How did it just register to him now? He lived in the same apartment as him.
I looked to my hand feeling guilty. Why was I feeling guilty? I had no reason to be guilty. It wasn't like I made any promises to Kyle or that we even went on a single date. We were nothing other than friend. But he liked me, and Daniel said he wanted to ask me out. What are we going to do?
Kyle took the empty seat beside me and I forced a smile to him which he returned cheerfully.
"It's nice seeing the sun out," he said.
I nodded. "Yeah, very nice," I mumbled taking another bite of the egg.
Thankfully, Mia changed the topic. As if she sensed my fear and started talking about stuff she wanted to do today which included going south to Byron Bay and look at the lighthouse. But everything she said went through one ear and out the other. I glanced at Daniel and all happiness was drained form his face. He was staring at the mug, deep in thought.
"Actually, I actually was hoping to spend some time with Ellie. I heard you were fascinated by marine life so thought maybe you'd want to go to SeaWorld?"
How did he know that? Did Daniel tell him? Wait, was Kyle asking me out again? In front of all his friends? Again?
"I, uh," I stuttered. Why was I freezing? Just say no. It was as simple as that. But I looked at Daniel and he was looking at me with unreadable expression and I just wished he could tell me what to say. Could I reject him? I couldn't do that. Not after what I did to him last time when he asked me out publicly at assembly.
"Sounds like a great idea. Why don't we all go?" Mia pitched in, coming to my rescue.
"Oh, I was just hoping—" Kyle started but stopped himself. "We should leave soon. The line will be long."
I nodded quietly. I found myself looking at Daniel once again and finally, I understood what that expression meant. Why he was staring at his mug so solemnly. He was regretting kissing me.
At SeaWorld, Kyle was sticking close by me preventing me from even approaching Daniel to talk about it. To talk about what we should do. I could tell it was killing him. He just kissed the girl his best friend had a crush on. He just broke the bro code, and he was dying inside.
Yet, the whole time, Kyle was oblivious. He tried talking to me every chance he got. He even tried to buy my ticket and ended up doing it after much protest. He bought me a coffee and then snacks as if he was my boyfriend.
When we went to watch the Dolphin show, Kyle even sat in between Daniel and me. It was like Kyle was trying to keep me away from Daniel as much as possible and it was getting harder to try talk to him. Even Beth could tell something was up. She kept glancing at me and Daniel as if she could read the tension in the air. Beth was the last person I wanted to know about us. If she did, I don't know what she'd do. And after a while, I even saw her look away, a smile on her lips. Not a kind one. But an evil one, like she just figured everything out.
"What's wrong Kyle?" Mia asked me as we headed to the bathroom after the Dolphin show. "It's like he's hogging his favourite toy or something. I can't even spend time with you."
I didn't say anything. I washed my hands silently and Mia already knew what I was going through my head.
"You haven't spoken to Daniel about Kyle yet, have you?"
I shook my head silently.
"Dang. Why is he being so difficult?" Mia mumbled to herself. "Okay, I have a plan. I'll distract Kyle and you and Daniel go stand in line of a ride or something so Kyle can't randomly show up and try stand with you."
I wasn't sure how Mia was going to separate Kyle from us but somehow she did. When we got back to the group, we talked about what to see next and Mia managed to slip in she wanted to eat a burger and convinced Kyle to join her. Kyle didn't seem to want to go but ultimately agreed. But Beth, her cult and Peter was still with us.
I moved towards Daniel. "Hey, come with me," I whispered so no one else could hear.
Daniel glanced at the others before nodding. We walked away while Beth was busy looking through her phone and we managed to head to one of the rides and stood in line.
"I find it hard to believe you actually want to go on this ride," Daniel stated.
I rolled my eyes. "Just because I'm scared of heights, sharks, and horror movies, doesn't mean I'm afraid of roller coasters," I scoffed as if deeply offended.
"I'll only believe it when I see it," he replied cheekily but the smile disappeared as soon as it came.
There was a moment of silence between us. More people started lining up behind us. I tried looking for the others in the near distance and found Beth still on her phone. Good. Kyle hasn't gotten back yet. Mia must be taking her longest time ordering.
"So, um, Kyle," I said, breaking the silence.
Daniel sighed. His eyes closed. "I don't know what to do, Ellie," he advised. He looked so defeated.
"I don't know either," I replied solemnly.
"I want to be able to hold you any time I want. I want to kiss you in front of everyone and you wouldn't mind nor care. I want to be able to scream out to the world that Ellie Scotts is my girl. I want you to be mine and I want to be yours," he said quiet enough so only I could hear. My heart fluttered even though as he was saying it, he looked sad. "But I can't."
I nodded, turning to face the front of the line. "I get it. It's okay," I mumbled.
"But I can't just stop this either," he continued. He turned to me, taking my hand. "I want us to be together. I want to be your first everything. I want to be your first kiss, I want to be your first date, I want to be the first guy that you ever had a serious, committed relationship, and I want to be your first love. But what I don't want to be is your first heart break, your first break up, the first person you don't ever want to see."
I gave a small smile, trying to push aside the squeeze of my heart. I just realised my feelings for him, and he felt the same. But now we had to give it up? I hated it. I didn't want to, but I didn't know what to do. I couldn't say no.
"You don't have to worry about me, Daniel. I understand. I'm a big girl."
Daniel shook his head. He placed his hand on my shoulder and had me turn to face him. "I'm not ready to let go of you yet, and I'm not going to. I just... I just need to talk to Kyle first. He needs to hear it from me before we can go public."
"So, you mean we keep this," I gestured to the both of us, "a secret for now?"
"If you're okay with that."
"You know, I made a promise to myself that I wasn't going to be in a committed relationship with anyone while in senior year," I advised. I could see his eyes sadden slightly. He nodded as if he understood. "But I already decided this morning that I was going to break my own promise for you. So, of course I'm okay with it."
A smug smile appeared on Daniel's face. The light returning in his eyes and his smile genuine. "Good, because I don't think I could take a no for an answer."