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"Is it so bad that I find you extremely beautiful Miss Rosen?" Jared asked as I stood by my car trying to get out of the awkward situation.
Jared was a seventeen year old boy who was in one of junior English class. He was actually really friendly towards me from the very first day of my teaching practice but today was a whole different story. It's been a month since I've been at the Sandy Mount high school and recently found out that Jared had a crush on me.
School had ended and I was headed for my car when Jared ran over to me. I was at a loss for words when he came and started to confess his feelings for me. I had the most awkward task of trying to let him down easy without breaking his young heart.
I couldn't help but wonder what it was about today that caused me to be getting so much confessions about feelings. First it was Mr.Franklin, one of the young math teacher at the school. I had to let him down easy some hours earlier and now Jared?
"That is sweet Jared, " I smiled at him sympathetically. "But that is really not appropriate okay. I'm your teacher."
"I know but you aren't my real teacher right. You being my English teacher right now is only temporary right? So I don't think that it would be such a big deal." Jared said to me.
Lord help me
"Jared, it doesn't matter if I am your real teacher or not. The fact still remain that I am your teacher, I'm a professional and after a few months, I may be back at this same school as a permanent teacher next semester." I said to him. "And you're seventeen Jared, you'll get over this little teenage crush."
"What if I can't ms. Rosen? What if I don't want to?" Jared asked. "It's really hard to pretend that I don't have feelings for you. Maybe... Maybe when you're finished with your teaching practice, we could have lunch together sometime?"
"Jared, stop. That wouldn't be appropriate and won't be happening." I said to him. "You need to..."
"Is it because I'm still a teenager? I can be pretty mature and responsible for my age and besides, I don't think you're all that older than me. Not that it would matter how old you are. I still think you're the smartest and most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life."
"Jared, I'm flattered by your compliments. Thank you but you need to forget about this idea of yours okay?" I told him gently. "I can tell that you are a sweet guy and no doubt about your level of maturity and responsibility but I am not the one for you alright. First of all, I am your teacher and that would be so unacceptable and inappropriate. I am not the one for you. You're still young, you're only seventeen and i'm much older than you and it's..."
"You're still young as well. I mean, you can't be like more than five or six years older than me. At least you don't look like you." Jared said determined. "And I'll be eighteen next year but isn't age just a number?"
Tell me about it.
"Look Jared, I think it's cute that you have a crush on me but believe me when I say that this isn't going to last very long. Before you know it, you're going to see some girl in your own age group that makes your heart pound twice as fast. Contrary to what you might think, I am not that girl. We are at two different places in our lives and I'm in a committed relationship with a man that I'm so in love with." I told him. "I never dreamt that I would have ever found someone that I'd want to spend the rest of my life with, but I did. One day you will too."
"That guy must be one lucky guy." Jared said to me.
"Yeah, he is." I smiled at him. "You're going to find that one special girl one day too. I just think you need to start looking in your own age group and you'll find her."
"I guess. I just never really been into girls my age."
"That's because you probably never been looking at girls in your age group. Don't worry Jared, you'll find someone. And a piece advice, don't make anymore rash decisions or confessions like you did today."
"I did embarrass haven't I?" Jared let out a chuckle.
"No." I laughed with him.
"Don't deny it Ms.Rosen, I just made a complete fool out of myself." Jared smiled.
"Maybe a little bit." I chuckled. "Don't worry about it. You'll find the right girl for you Jared."
"Thank you Ms. Rosen. Have a great weekend."
"You too Jared." I smiled at him before opening the car door.
*****
"So this is dad, this is Alli, that's you, and that is me
at the front. I'm the little one." Chrissy informed me as we were seated at the table in the kitchen.
Sean wasn't home as yet and I had no idea where Aliyah had gone to after she came home from school. It was just Chrissy and I alone at the moment and she was showing me the drawings she did today at school depicting her family. I was flattered that she saw me as a part of her family.
"Oh? My my, I do have a huge head there don't I?" I chuckled as I looked at the big headed stick figure that Chrissy pointed out was me. "Is that how big my head really is in real life?"
"No." Chrissy shake her head laughing. "It's just a drawing."
"Oh great. For a second there, I thought I really did have a big head." I laughed as I tickled Chrissy causing her to giggle.
"Morgan?"
"Yeah sweetie?"
"I'm glad you're living with us. My daddy is always happy since you came to live with us. I'm glad you're with my daddy." She said to me.
"Yeah, me too." I told her just before we heard the front door opened and closed.
"Looks like your daddy's home."
"Dad!?" Chrissy jumped
up from the table and ran out of the kitchen.
I got up and walked out as well as I went to greet Sean. I was surprised to see Aliyah came with him.
"Hey." I greeted Sean as he picked up Chrissy.
"Hi." Sean greeted solemnly.
"Is everything okay?" I asked curiously.
"Yeah." Sean responded.
"Excuse me." Aliyah said to me as she headed upstairs.
"Okay." I said. "I made dinner and Chrissy helped."
"Oh that's great." Sean put on a smile as he looked at Chrissy. "So I got a little chef huh? Why don't you go get ready for dinner then."
"Okay." Chrissy smiled as Sean put her down.
"Are you sure you're alright?" I stepped closer to Sean.
"I'm fine Morgan. I've just had a long day."
Something was definitely off with Sean. Dinner was awkwardly silent and I keep getting this feelings that he was upset with me or something. By the time we had retired upstairs, there was so much tension that I couldn't stand it anymore, I had to confront Sean about it.
"Is it just me or are you mad at me for something I have no idea that I did?"
I asked.
"Just go to bed Morgan." Was Sean's response and it totally pissed me off for some reason.
"No Sean, I'm not going to just go to bed when you've been giving me the cold shoulder all evening." I said to him. "I want to know what's up with you or what you're mad at me for. Because I can't recall doing anything to make you mad."
"Morgan, I'm tired. I had a really long and stressful day." Sean responded.
"You've got to be kidding. Sean, it's obvious that something is bothering you. So why don't you spit it out, so I can apologize if it's somehow my fault?"
"I don't want to fight okay?" Sean said as he sat on his side of the bed.
"Good, me neither. And even more so because I don't know what we would be fighting about." I said to him. "Sean, you have to talk to me. What's up with you?"
"How do you enjoy being at Sandy Mount high?"
Sean surprised me when he asked.
"Uhm, it's a great school, great experience and great students and staff." I responded. "Why? What does this have to do with why you're so grumpy."
"So you like the school because of the students and the staff?"
"I like the school because I like teaching and yeah I like the students and staff because they are very friendly and welcoming... But what does that have to do with anything?"
"Any student or staff more than the other?" Sean.
"What? No...Sean what are you getting at?"
"What about Mr.Franklin?" Sean asked surprising me.
"What? What about him?" I asked.
"Or that kid...what's his name? Jareard or Jerry?" Sean asked me.
"Jared?"
"Oh, so you know who I'm talking about then?" Sean said to me.
"How do you about Jared and Mr.Franklin? Wait... Did Aliyah say something to you because..."
"So it is true then." Sean said to me.
"Is what true Sean? I'm confused. I don't know what Aliyah said to you but I don't have a clue as to what you're talking about."
"I'm talking about your supposed affair with Aliyah's math teacher or your constant flirting with him and that student Jarrett or Jerry..."
"Jared, his name is Jared. And I seriously can't believe you Sean." I said in total disbelief. "I don't know what lies or exaggerated stories Aliyah might have cooked up and fed you, but I can't believe this any at all. You seriously just sit there and accused me of cheating on you with some guy I've only met a few weeks ago and a teenage boy? Is that how lowly you think of me?"
"I heard about it all, your frequent lunch date with him, you and him being all flirty every chance you get. And not to mention that kid who seem pretty fond of you. I've heard it all. I know about your meetings with both of them today and I've seen the pictures..."
"What pictures?"
"I don't want to have this conversation anymore Morgan. If you wanted the thrill of being with someone younger, then you have the decency to tell me."
What the....
I was beyond shock and speechless at this point. I really didn't know what to say or how to react. I don't know if this was a joke or what. Sean and I had been together for over a year now and we've never really been in any fights or arguments ever, but tonight was our first real fight and it was not what I expected.
"Wow." Was all I could say due to how shocked I was.
"So that's what you really think of me Sean? So what, you think that I'm some young wanton woman that have no regards, self respect or control so I'd be desperate enough to go to school and start something with one of the teachers there...oh, and the teacher isn't enough for me so I had to go flirting and starting an affair with a teenage boy? Why? Because I'm like secretly a slut or something?"
"I never said you were..."
"You don't have to say it Sean. That's what you're implying when you're stupidly accusing me of something so despicable that I have not a clue about!" I was passed the point of being calm now.
"I am a people person Sean, I started my teaching practice at Sandy Mount and in a couple weeks, I met a lot of friends. Most of the teachers there are extremely friendly and welcoming towards us. Mr. Franklin and I got along well so we would have lunch together sometime or hang out whenever we both have a free period and he would discuss with us some issues that they faced as teachers. Kim always had lunch with us as well. Today Mr.Franklin asked if he could take me out for dinner, he confessed to liking me. He didn't know I was in a relationship. I told him that I can't because I have a boyfriend, he said he understood and was happy for me. We hugged and that was that. Jared is one of my student and he's not exactly the outgoing or outspoken type so I tried to engage him in conversation during the class time and was friendly to him outside of class. Somehow he got really comfortable with me and must've gotten the wrong idea and developed a crush on me. I told him the same thing that I told Mr. Franklin and that was the end of it. I don't have control over people liking me or confessing their feelings for me Sean. I am a genuinely nice person so I try to be nice and friendly with almost everyone but I don't go around flirting with people.
"I don't know what kind of game Aliyah is playing at if she decided that she was going to spy on me during school hours, took pictures and then bring back lies to you. Sean, in case you haven't noticed, your daughter doesn't like me very much. Over the past few months she's tried so hard to start a fight between us because she wants me out of your life. First it was her constant rude behaviour towards me, and when I didn't flee at that, she started to target me personally. It started with her taking my lipsticks and then when I confronted her about it, she pulled that stunt where she started screaming at me and getting all upset and said that I was calling her a thief. That was her first attempt to start a fight between us. Then it was that incident when she pretended that it was an accident when she spilled that tea on me, she wanted me to snap and then somehow an argument would arise between us. When that failed, she took my brand new top that my mom bought me and I decided not to say anything about it because I saw what she was doing.
" And now this? She deliberately set out to start this argument between us. I don't know what lies or insecurity she filled in your head but I'm guessing it finally worked now. You fall right into her plot because why wouldn't you? She your daughter. She had your head filled with I don't know what and it caused you to decided to accuse me. This is what she wants all along, an argument between the two of us. And you know what, I feel really disrespected right now. I am in total disbelief that you would even fall for such a plot and think so lowly of me. I may be young Sean but I have standards and morals okay. I don't go around flirting with people or having affairs that isn't me and I thought you knew me better than that."
"Morgan, I..." Sean began looking remorseful after all I just said to him but I cut him off.
"No Sean. I think... I think we need some time apart."
"What? Wait... what are you saying?" Sean asked nervously as he neared me. "You're not breaking up with me are you? Over one silly fight?"
"No, I'm not breaking up with you." I told him which caused him to look relieved. "I just think that... Maybe I should just go stay at my parents house for a while..."
"You're kidding right? Are you serious?" Sean said in disbelief. "Look Morgan, baby I'm sorry. I just lose my head a bit when Alli.... I really didn't mean to upset or offend you like this, I'm really sorry. I don't know what has got into me, I just... I love you so much and the thought of you being close with another guy... I am an idiot, I'll admit it. It's just that, sometimes I do get jealous and insecure. I try not to be and I usually hide it well but sometimes I can't help it.
"I've been single for a long time and then when you came into my life, I could hardly believe it. I mean, I feel like the luckiest guy alive to have someone like you in my life. And this may be the stupidest excuse ever, but sometimes because of our age differences, it makes me feel a bit insecure at times. I mean you're so smart, young and extremely beautiful and you've only just started your life. I on the other hand, I come along with what most people would say are baggages. And then I have two kids... Sometimes, I wonder if I'll ever be enough for you."
"You're right... You are an idiot. You are so goddamn stupid Sean." I said to him. "I love you. I'm so in love with you and you're more than enough for me but instances like tonight...it makes me wonder at times too."
"No, I don't want you to wonder. I want to be enough for you and I'm sorry about accusing you or doubting you. I'm sorry about Aliyah's behaviour and everything. I'm so sorry for being a complete and total idiot. I just want us to work this out."
"Me too Sean... But I still think that I should go spend some time with my parents. It will give us both time to cool off and time that you can spend with your daughters especially Aliyah- without me." I said to him. "I think, she just really want some father daughter time and maybe she sees me being in the way right now, so I'm trying to fix things."
"Morgan, you don't have to go in order for me to spend time with them... I don't want you to go."
"Sean, I think this would be best for now. You can talk to her seriously, have a heart to heart with her. Let her know that you're not replacing her with me because I think she sees me as that. Tomorrow, I'll go spend the weekend and the coming week with my parents. After all, I think I too need a little father daughter time. Don't worry, I'm not leaving you, I'll come back next weekend. But if you screw up like this ever again Sean..."
"I won't. I promise."Sean said as he took my hands in his. "I don't want to lose you, and I'll do anything just to have you by my side for a long long time."
***
Well wasn't that a long long chapter?
Sean and Morgan had their first fight bit luckily they fixed it before going to bed.
🎵🎼🎶🎶I don't wanna go to bed mad at you😉🎵🎶🎶 - Mad by Neyo came to mind.
Hope you guys enjoy it.
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