September 2015
"You'll do great, Callie-Cat. Good luck," Shannon said into his phone.
He wasn't sure Callie heard him because the line went dead. He sighed before putting it on the coffee table in front of the sofa.
"It's Emmys Night. She's probably too busy to be able to talk much," Jared offered as he came out of Shannon's kitchen and sat next to him, bowl of popcorn in hand. "Remember awards season for me? It was total chaos ninety percent of the time."
Shannon shrugged and took a handful of popcorn, careful not to drop any.
"Why are we watching this anyway? Its totally stupid," Jared continued.
"Because she's my friend and I want to support her," Shannon explained in a strained voice. "If you don't want to watch you don't have to stay."
"Alright, don't get your balls in a knot," Jared replied. "I'm just curious."
Shannon rolled his eyes. He had been looking forward to watching the show so he could see if Callie won. When Jared called and invited himself over for the evening, Shannon had to change his plans a bit.
"Well stop it," Shannon insisted.
"You aren't watching the pre-show?" Jared needled him, reaching for the remote.
"For fuck's sake, Jay!" Shannon exclaimed in frustration.
Jared chuckled and turned the TV on. The room was filled with chatter from the news until he changed it to the Entertainment network. The cameras were panning across the red carpet in front of the Microsoft Theater downtown. People were crowding the carpet and it looked like total chaos.
"Do you know if Callie's there yet?" Jared asked.
"I think she had just left," Shannon said. "It sounded pretty hectic, so I didn't get to ask."
"Welcome back to the 2015 Primetime Emmy Awards pre-show red carpet," Ryan Seacrest said into the camera. "We've got interviews with all the hottest nominees coming at you. Don't forget to tune into E! News tomorrow to catch all of the best and worst dressed winners from tonight's show."
The camera panned away from him and showed celebrities milling about, posing for photos, and greeting each other on the red carpet. Shannon smiled when he saw Callie. She had on a deep blue floor-length gown with a high slit up one side of the dress. He could see black sky-high heels on her feet as she walked. The dress glittered in the lights and trailed behind her slightly, contrasting with her pale skin and the red carpet beautifully. Then Shannon's heart stopped.
She wasn't alone.
She was walking, hand-in-hand with a tall lanky guy who had short curly brown hair and cheekbones that could have cut glass. He had on a well-tailored suit and was too close to Callie to be just a friend. Fortunately, Jared took the words out of Shannon's mouth, so he didn't feel as stupid saying them.
"Who's that?" Jared asked.
Shannon knew exactly who he was. "Matthew Grey Gubler," he said.
"Oh. Are they..." Jared started. But before he could finish his question, Matthew leaned over and kissed Callie gently on the cheek. "Oh."
Shannon could feel his brother's eyes on him as he stared at the screen, desperately trying to keep emotion off of his face. "I guess they are," he replied simply.
"Clearly you didn't know," Jared said.
Shannon shrugged. "Its not a big deal. She can date whomever she wants. Doesn't bother me."
His brother narrowed his eyes at him, but stayed silent. They watched as Callie made her way up the red carpet and stopped for an interview.
"I need a piss," Shannon said, standing.
He walked through the house back to his bedroom, shutting the door quickly. He leaded back against it, resisting the urge to scream at the top of his lungs. How the fuck could she do this? Not only did she not tell him about it, he had to find out like that, with Jared breaking down his fucking neck. He felt his heart racing and he pushed off the door and started pacing.
Relax. She's allowed to to date whomever she wants. You two made it pretty clear you weren't anything beyond friends.
His thoughts raced even faster.
But we could have been more than friends if she had just opened her eyes! She's worried about my age, but why should she? Its not like I'm marrying her.
He flopped back onto his bed and closed his eyes, trying to rationalize his feelings with what he had just seen. Why didn't she tell him about Matthew? She spent weeks denying that they were an item, so what had changed? How could she have gone from "We're just friends" to "Be my date on the biggest night of my career?"
He felt betrayed; she had so many chances to tell him and it never happened. Why did she feel like she needed to keep it a secret? His racing heart was replaced with anger, creeping hot and slow into every inch of his body. If she wanted to keep secrets from him, he could do the same to her. He sat up and went into the bathroom, opening his medicine cabinet. His heart started racing again as he stared at the bottle in his hand.
The bottle was labeled Ibuprofen, but he knew what was really inside. It was a trick he had picked up from someone in rehab once - keep a small stash on hand as a reminder of what you could lose. So far it had never failed, through breakups and fights, to remind him of how dangerous it was to go down that road again. But now?
Something about Callie had vexed him and stolen his attention and he didn't know what. Why was it that every time he was around her, his brain stopped working? Why did he get more pleasure out of seeing her smile or hearing her laugh than he ever did from performing any show? What was it about her that was so different from every other girl he had ever been with? How was it that someone that was supposed to be only a friend had such a pull over him?
"Shannon? You okay back there? Did you fall in?" Jared called from the end of the hallway. "The shows about to start. You're gonna miss it."
Shannon sighed, washed his hands, and walked out of the bathroom, leaving the pill bottle on the marble counter. Jared was sitting on the sofa again, bowl of popcorn in hand. The award show had begun and two young actresses were presenting the first award. He sat down and did his best to pay attention when all he really wanted to do was kick Jared out and go to bed.
***
Shannon looked up from his phone as the door to the cafe opened. He thought it was Callie, but was disappointed when he saw it was only an older woman. He watched as the woman ordered at the counter and waited by the dessert display case as her drink was made. He was just turning his attention back to the article on his phone when the door opened again and a petite woman with wild red curls walked in.
Callie.
It had been a week since she had won the Emmy and things had been very quiet between them. He had invited her out to coffee in an attempt to get her alone. He was still stewing from the revelation of Matthew as her boyfriend, and surprisingly enough, Callie had not said a word to him about it. He stood and greeted her with a hug and peck on the cheek.
"Hey!" she exclaimed, sitting down opposite him. "How have you been?"
He shrugged. "I'm still here," he remarked casually.
In reality, he had spent several nights in the last week staring at the ibuprofen bottle on his nightstand. He kept reminding himself that nothing was worth his sobriety, but his mind continued to play tricks on him, leading him through dreams featured Callie.
"Congratulations, by the way," he said, smiling. "You looked fantastic, too."
Her face lit up as she put her sunglasses on the table. "Really? Thank you so much! Its still kind of a blur, if I'm honest. I don't really remember much about that night. Did you watch?"
Shannon nodded. "Of course I did. One of my best friends was nominated for a big award. Do you think I would just wait and see what happened?"
She chuckled. "I'm gonna get a coffee. Want anything?" she asked, standing.
He shook his head. "Since when do you drink coffee?"
"Since I had to start going full speed on two hours of sleep," she replied, walking over to the counter.
The cafe was a small upscale coffee shop in West Hollywood that had just popped up. It wasn't as well-known to locals yet, but Shannon knew the owner. The two of them had met at a coffee trade show and he had made it an effort to maintain a good relationship with her. She had promised to stock Black Fuel when business took off a bit.
The walls were done in a clean white horizontal subway tile and the floors were a warn chestnut wood. The barista counter held court a few feet in front of the door while black metal tables and chairs filled a small dining room off to the side. There was a college student working on a laptop in the corner, but other than that the place was pretty much empty.
Callie came back with a cup of coffee and sat down. "So, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" she asked.
He blinked. "You get right to it," he chuckled. "Can't a guy ask his friend out for coffee?"
"Yeah," she sipped the drink. "But it just seemed urgent when you called."
He sighed and nodded. Time to bite the bullet. "I was watching the Emmys and I saw you with Matthew," he started. "You two looked really close."
She nodded. "Yeah. He's really sweet."
"It's just - I thought you two weren't dating," he finally said.
She looked at him for a second, taken aback. "I - what does that have to do with anything?"
"You didn't tell me," he said. "I didn't realize you two were so serious."
"We aren't," she answered, looking down at her cup.
"But you took him to the Emmys? Seems kind of serious if you're going to a major event as a couple," he replied.
She stiffened. "It was just an event."
"Yeah...but its easily the biggest event of your career. You didn't bring your sisters or your dad or anyone else? But Matthew was an ideal candidate?" Shannon said.
Callie rolled her eyes. "Since when has that mattered to you?"
Shannon chuckled. "I guess I just figured that you'd introduce me to the guy you're seeing since I'm supposedly your friend."
Callie scoffed and looked at him in surprise. "I didn't realize you needed to know every detail about my love life, Shannon."
"No I don't," he assured her. "But I asked you a bunch of times if there was something between you two and you said no every time."
"I didn't think you'd care, to be honest," she answered. "You never tell me about people you're hooking up with."
"You introduced him as your boyfriend," he replied. "That's a bit different from a hook up. Obviously you two have been seeing each other long enough to establish you're in a relationship."
She looked away from him for a second and he could tell she was choosing her words carefully. When she turned back to him, her brown eyes met his like melted milk chocolate.
"I guess I didn't want to hurt your feelings," she said softly. "I - I know how you feel about me. I didnt want you to get hurt."
He blinked. "Too damn late, Cal." He sighed and sat back in his chair. "You kind of lied to me. I feel a little betrayed right now, if I'm honest."
"Don't be ridiculous, Shannon," Callie said. "You don't get to play that card with me. I made it very clear what our relationship was after we slept together. I'm not responsible for how you respond to things."
Shannon stared at her in disbelief. "Wow," he said. "Winning an Emmy certainly changed you. Though, I have to admit it took less time than I thought it would."
She rolled her eyes again and scoffed. "Don't even."
"Callie, we're supposed to be friends. We are supposed to be able to share big things with each other," he said. "I don't know why you felt like you couldn't tell me this. I'm a little hurt, to be honest. I thought we were closer than that."
He picked up his cell phone and stood, walking out of the cafe and down the street. The sidewalks were only partially crowded since tourist season had ended and all of the local kids were back in school. He was almost at his car when he heard her voice.
"Shannon!" she called. He turned and saw her running toward him. "Shannon wait!" Her hair flew behind her asshe jogged up to him. She slowed to a walk a few paces away and closed the gap between them. "I'm sorry, okay? You're right. I should have told you."
He sighed amd nodded. "Yeah. You should have. Especially if things are serious enough for you to take him to the Emmys."
"I know. I should have. I'm sorry," she said. He couldn't see her eyes behind her dark sunglasses, but he knew what they would look like. They had teased him in his dreams often enough. "What if you come over for dinner sometime soon? You could meet him," she suggested.
His keys jingled in his hands as he considered her offer. "Uh...sure. That sounds cool I guess."
In reality, he'd rather have all of his pubes threaded out than spend an evening watching Callie flirt with Matthew Grey Gubler's nervous skinny ass. But he had to keep up a good show for her.
"Great! I know you're getting ready for tour in a few weeks. Do you have time after you get back?" She asked. "Matt's filming in LA all month."
"Yeah, that sounds good," he answered, cringing internally.
"Awesome. Well, I'm going to head out. I've got a meeting with my agent in Hollywood in half an hour," Callie said. "He says he's got a few potential roles that I could audition for."
"Ooo! Big Hollywood star now, huh?" he teased her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close. "Have fun," he said, giving her a squeeze before letting go.
She patted his chest before stepping away. "Are we okay?" she asked.
"Yes. We're fine. Go," he urged her.
He got into his car and watched her walk away up the sidewalk. His phone vibrated and he looked down at it. When he looked back up, she had disappeared.
***
***ENTERTAINMENT SCOOP***
Caught getting cozy? Fresh off of her Emmy win for her role in Netflix's sleeper hit show SANCTUM, Callie Morrison was seen out today with 30 Seconds to Mars drummer Shannon Leto. They got coffee at a nearby cafe. The pair got quite cozy when they said goodbye.
Earlier this year, Shannon joined Callie, two of her sisters, her SANCTUM cast mates and rumored beau Tom Hiddleston in a luxury villa in Greece. Callie has recently gone public with current boyfriend Matthew Grey Gubler of Criminal Minds fame and the two attended the Emmy's together.
They were quite close at all of the after parties and Matthew has even put a few photos of Callie on his Instagram account. One has to wonder if Callie and Shannon are more than friends.
***
Shannon sighed as he lay in bed, staring at his ceiling. He had been putting the phone call off all day, but he couldn't do it any longer. Jared was already probably pissed that he wasn't here. Its not as though it could really get any worse at this point. He picked up his phone and dialed his brother's number. He sighed in relief when Shayla answered.
"Shannon?" she asked, her voice perky. "What's up?"
"Can you put my brother on, please?" he asked, trying to keep his voice level.
"Yeah, sure. Give me a minute," she replied. The phone like went silent and he knew she had put him on hold. "Here," she said a second later.
"Shannon? Where are you?" Jared demanded.
"Hello to you, too," Shannon quipped, hoping to lighten the mood.
"Seriously," Jared insisted. "Where are you? Did you miss your flight? What? You were supposed to be here an hour ago."
"I know," Shannon said. "I didn't miss my flight." He took a deep breath. "I'm actually not coming."
There was a good 3-second pause as his words sank into Jared's head.
"You what?" Jared asked. Shannon could hear the tension growing in his brother's voice as he took in Shannon's words.
"I'm not coming. I decided I'm not doing this leg," Shannon said.
"Shannon! You have to come! I can't play with just Tomo on stage! These are shows we had to reschedule already!" Jared fumed. "How do you think it'll look if we show up with two-thirds of the fucking band?"
"Just play with a backing track like we usually do," Shannon suggested.
"Why in the fuck don't you want to come?" Jared asked, taking a deep breath.
"I guess I just don't have it in me," He answered.
"You don't have it in you?" Jared mocked. "Well neither do I sometimes, but I still haul my ass out of bed - even with a massive fucking fever!"
"Yeah, well I'm not you!" Shannon shot back. This was proving harder than he anticipated it would be. "I just need some time to clear my head and refocus. I can't fly across the world for three fucking dates. It's ridiculous."
"You've had nothing but time to clear your head and refocus for the past few months!" Jared seethed. "Get on a damn plane and get your ass here. NOW!"
"No. You can't boss me around," Shannon answered, realizing he sounded like a petulant three-year-old. He took a deep breath and went in for the kill. "Look, I'll be totally honest."
"Please do!" Jared sneered.
"I - I need time to clear my head because I've been thinking about using again," Shannon said. It wasn't entirely inaccurate. He had been considering it. "I just don't feel like now is a good time, mentally, for me to be messing up my schedule like that."
Jared's mood instantly changed. "When was the last time you went to a meeting?" he asked.
"I - I haven't gone yet," Shannon said. "But I will, as soon as I get off the phone," he added.
"Why didn't you tell me sooner, Shannon? I would have stayed back with you," his brother said.
"Come on," Shannon scoffed. "You wouldn't do that. You'd have just sent Emma to manage me while you went off. We both know you live for performing. Don't lie on my account."
"Still," Jared said, guilt creeping in. "I could have helped you find a place and taken you in."
"I don't need rehab. I just need to reset and remind myself why its important to stay sober," Shannon insisted. "I can't do that if I'm jumping time zones like you jump rope."
Jared sighed. After a moment, he spoke. "Alright. Take the time you need. I'll call Kyle and explain everything. People aren't going to be happy about this and you'll probably get a lot of flak for it. So I'd just be careful about where you go and what you do," Jared warned. "The last thing we want to do is make people think you're skipping shows for shits and giggles."
"I know, I know," Shannon said. "Look, I think there's a meeting I can get to if I leave in a few minutes. I'll call you after?"
"I'll be onstage," Jared sighed. "Just text me. Shayla will respond and I'll call you when I'm free, okay?"
"Yeah."
"Please take care of yourself, Shan," Jared said softly.
Shannon ended the call and sat up. It was so much easier than he realized. Having an addiction history was bad in so many ways, but it had its positive sides as well. Like now: he had essentially lied to his brother to get out of doing a stupid, shitty show in the fucking desert or hanging off a cliff in Greece or Spain. All he had to do was play the 'vulnerable addict' card and he could have anything he wanted.
He walked into his bathroom and picked up the bottle. The pills inside rattled and he popped the lid off with his thumb. He considered the two white tablets in his hand for a few seconds, weighing if it was really worth it. Then his mind drifted to Callie. She was probably fucking Matthew right now. The idea of anyone else with her made his heart sink into his stomach. He shook his head and necked the two pills, washing them down with a swig of water from the sink.
Shannon walked through the room to his bed and laid down. He closed his eyes and settled in for the ride.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Callie, Shannon, and the whole gang will return in Philia, Book Two in the Amour Eternel series.
AUTHOR'S NOTE
This story took a long time to write and I am so proud that it is finally finished. A lot of things have changed in my life since I started it and I almost didn't pick it back up again. If not for the continued love I got on a daily basis from several incredible people, I very likely would have walked away entirely.
@MeghanMcConaghy you believed in me and reminded me of why I started writing.
@maggotzombie your constant support has been incredible and I am the lucky one to have you as a reader.
@nikkirazavi your continued love of all things Shannon is what drove me to write this piece.
@wraithex I aspire to be a smut queen like you some day.
@EllieHarris98 I count myself lucky to consider you a friend.
Thank you all so much for your continued support and love. This is by far not the end of Shannon and Callie's story. The second part will make an appearance soon. But for now, I've got a teenage girl with a rock star father to write about. That's right - the second book in the Parenthood series is coming up next. Be on the lookout for more information soon!
Savannah
For Jake. With all my love.