I was starting to worry. I'd been sitting on the couch for a good hour and Taylor was still outside. She had every right to be mad at me but she had to at least acknowledge that I'd just put my life into her hands. Literally.
"What else have you been lying about?", her voice startled me. I spun around to see her standing at the doorway. I patted the spot next to me and waited for her to join me on the couch. She sat on her side to face me and rested her head on the backrest.
"With everyone else I lie about everything. But with you I'm not pretending. You're the only one who knows about all of this", I said softly.
"So you really like pineapple and dogs?", she asked in a small voice. I laughed loudly. I thought she was going to strangle me but here she was asking about fruit and animals.
"Yeah I do. With someone else I would have answered cherry and rabbit", I giggled.
"But you hate those", she narrowed her eyes in confusion.
"My point exactly. You know the true me. The others they just know the manufactured Ashley", I said with a shrug.
I didn't know how she felt about all of this. Perhaps she was going to have second thoughts about me or she wouldn't be able to trust me anymore. But I couldn't let her go away. I needed to convince her that I was sincere and trustworthy.
"Look Taylor, I know that you probably hate me for lying to you about this but I wish you can understand where I come from. I've been hiding myself for a year now and of all the people I met, you're the only one who saw the real me. I'm literally trusting you with my life right now. I'll give you all the time you need to process all of this but you have to promise you'll come back to me. Please", at this point I was crying.
I thought about her leaving. I thought about her hating me and never speaking to me again. It would destroy me.
Her delicate fingers lifted my chin and made me look into her mesmerizing eyes.
"I'm not going anywhere Ash. I'm staying right here and you're not going to push me away by any means. Do you understand me?"
I'd never seen her this serious before. I didn't quite get it. She had stayed alone outside for a whole hour and now she was telling me not to give her space or time.
"You don't hate me?", my voice was raspy and my makeup probably ruined.
"I could never hate you for trying to protect yourself", she said with a smile plastered on her face. "You're so brave and strong. I feel privileged that you decided to share this piece of your life with me. And I swear to you, I will never break your trust."
I felt a weight leaving my shoulders. She didn't hate me. This was a miracle. How was she so understanding? The Taylor Lawson that I liked knew about my deepest secret and didn't hate me. I couldn't contain my emotions. I was sobbing but not because I was sad. These tears showed how relieved I was to know that Taylor was still here and still wanted me.
She didn't say anything after that. She just wrapped her arms around my neck and held me tightly against her. I closed my eyes and thanked whoever was up there for giving me the honor of having Taylor in my life. Taylor held me for what felt like two hours, her heading perfume comforting my sadness and soothing me.
When I finally calmed down, I looked up to meet her deep blue eyes that I admired so much and thanked her. She just nodded and smiled at me while pushing a strand of hair out of my face.
"So what do I have to call you?", she asked softly, making me scoff in amusement.
"Whatever you're more comfortable with. As long as you don't scream my real name in public that is."
I didn't want to force her into anything though. It was already amazing that she still wanted to talk to me so I needed to respect the fact that it was probably hard for her to get used to the idea that I had a fake identity.
"I can't make up my mind. I mean until now I've called you Ashley but Brooklyn is such a beautiful name that I really want to call you that. Plus it would be like our little secret. I really don't know", and here was the rambling Taylor that I liked. It was adorable the way she always thought out loud. She was giggling and fridgetting on her spot, as if waiting for her Christmas present.
"If you want to still call me Ashley I don't mind. Or you can call me by my real name when it's just the two of us and stick to Ashley when we're in public", I tried to offer solutions to ease her mind a little.
"I think I'll just go with the flow", she chuckled.
"Alright", I smiled and looked into her eyes.
I loved them so much. They could tell a million stories at the same time and convey so many emotions. They were beautiful.
"Why were you crying out there then?", I asked. I was still confused about this. I thought it was because she hated me but she made it clear that it was not the case.
"I was heartbroken. Not because you lied, I would have done the same thing, but because of what you went through. Just picturing you being hurt or injured is unbearable", she was crying again.
I didn't expect this. She cared so much and I hadn't even noticed. I was wrong all along. When I thought she was going to hate me and reject me, she was actually worried sick that something could happen to me. And that proved me that I did the right choice. She wouldn't leave. She wouldn't tell. She'd have my back and her tears proved it.
I hugged her and rubbed her back slowly to try and soothe her. When I heard that she was only sniffing I pulled away and cupped her cheeks to make her look at me.
"I can't thank you enough for sticking with me. But I don't wanna waste our amazing date with tears. So what do you want to do next?", I asked while stroking her right cheek with my thumb and smiling. Her face lit up and she immediately went back to her girl-in-an-amusement-park mode.
"I planned a whole program if you're still up for it", she said excitedly.
"Then what are we waiting for?"
She got up and grabbed my hand to guide me to the kitchen. As I sat on a stool, she took out a big chocolate cake from the fridge and placed it in front of me. She grabbed two forks and sat beside me.
"What is this?", I asked puzzled. She smiled brightly and handed me a fork.
"Dessert!", she exclaimed. She was too cute for my own good.
We started eating and she went back to playing her questions game, except this time I got to ask some questions too. And my next one had been bugging me for awhile.
"Why did you bring me here?"
"It's my house", she said calmly. I choked on my food and started coughing.
Her house? Did that mean that her parents were around? Oh my god, I was not prepared for this. Was she crazy?
She patted my back and ran to get me a glass of water.
"What do you mean your house? Taylor I can't meet your parents. This is so fucked up!", I was panicking. I was not made for the whole parents thing. She started laughing. "Why are you laughing? This is not funny!" I exclaimed. She cupped my cheek and made me look at her.
"Ash I said my house. Not my parents' house", she said giggling.
"Then why the fuck are you living with me in my shitty apartment instead of staying in your princess castle?", I asked baffled. She started blushing and looked down while twisting her fork around the plate.
"I... Hm... Actually I liked your picture on the ad and... I couldn't miss the chance", she mumbled sheepishly.
She sounded so embarrassed but she was so cute. I couldn't believe she was paying for a rent just to live with me because she found me pretty on a fucking picture. Taylor Lawson was definitely something else.
"So if I get it right, you bought your way into my life", I teased and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Was it worth it?", she whispered while looking up.
I smiled brightly and dropped a kiss at the corner of her mouth.
"So worth it."
The next activity that Taylor planned for us was frighteningly exciting. She wanted to go skinny dipping. Honestly, I would never refuse to see her naked again because her body was a pure work of art. I had to admit that I was slightly stressed out though. I always felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I was so used to hiding my scars. They were horrible. Even though Taylor had already seen them, I couldn't help but feel intimidated and sick about my body.
While Taylor went inside to grab us towels, I undressed and found myself standing in front of this marvelous garden in just my black thong. This feeling was amazing. I felt so free and out of obligations. It was pleasant to be able to be myself for once.
The sound of smashing glass pulled me out of my reverie. I turned around quickly to find a frozen Taylor looking straight at me, her mouth agape, the towels tucked under one arm and a broken bottle of champagne at her feet.
"Are you trying to kill me?!", she exclaimed. I narrowed my eyes and looked at her, trying to decipher where she was going with this. "You can't just walk around like that.. No.. This is not.. Argh!", her hands were moving in all directions and her eyes were travelling my body.
Now I understood what it was all about! Maybe I could play her a little... I started walking slowly towards her.
"Does that make you uncomfortable? I thought you wanted to go skinny dipping. It's okay if you changed your mind", I said innocently and tilted my head. I was now standing right in front of her so I grabbed a strand of her hair to twirl it around my finger, my eyes challenging her. "We'll just move on to the next activity of your program. It's manicure, right?", I enjoyed it so much. I was flirting with her as fuck and her face was priceless. Her skin turned bight red.
"Right", she whispered. She gulped and nodded slowly.
"Cool. Let me get dressed then", I turned around but wasn't able to take a step. I felt her hand grabbing my upper arm and yanking me backward to face her.
"Don't you dare", she said firmly. I laughed lightly and wrapped my arms around her neck while biting my bottom lip.
Her eyes bulged when she felt my naked breast against the fabric of her dress. I leaned forward and pressed my lips on her cheek. Slowly, I kissed my way along her jawline until reaching her ear. Although I was the one teasing her, my pulse was getting ahead of itself. I could sense how frustrated both of us were.
"Race you", I whispered against her ear and took off running toward the swimming pool. Before even letting myself enough time to think it through, I jumped into the water.
Luckily for me, the temperature was amazing. It actually felt refreshing and cooling. When I resurfaced, I found Taylor standing at the edge of the pool, still fully dressed and a tiny bit angry.
"What's wrong Tay?", I asked in a sweet and caring voice. She put her hands on her hips and frowned.
"Are you really asking me this? You, my dear, are nothing but a tease. You think it's funny to seduce me just to run away from me? Do you realize how hard it is to resist you? And you're not making the situation any better! You know what? Enjoy the pool!", she turned around and walked in the direction of the house.
I quickly got out of the water and ran to catch up with her. I jumped on her back, making her stumbled a little before she was able to find her balance.
"Ashley you better get off my back right now! You're going to ruin my dress!", she whined.
Not intending to let go without a victory, I reached for her ear and whispered seductively, "Take it off then."
Which she did. She took the dress off. The tables had turned and I became the one with a crimson red face. She was just too gorgeous. I would never get tired of this. Ever.
She took my hand and we jumped into the water together. It was so much fun. We tried drowning each other and splashing each other's face. Her mellifluous giggles were all I could listen to. It genuinely made me happy to be the one sharing this moment with her. I hoped we would continue to be this playful and joyful around each other for a very long time.
After awhile I ran out of breath so I swam and leaned on the edge of the pool. Taylor joined me and stopped right in front of me. This proximity was overwhelming.
"Are you tired?", she asked teasingly.
"Yeah well, I don't work out anymore", it made her giggle and I noticed that she was getting more and more closer. Why was I growing nervous?
"A body like that leads to confusion", she whispered against my face.
She bit her bottom lip as her eyes kept going back and forth between my eyes and my mouth. She pressed her body against mine and put her hands on each side of my head, as if trapping me. A small gasp escaped my mouth with the contact of our naked breasts. It was taking all my willpower not to take her. I craved her.
I placed my left hand on her waist and cupped her cheek with the other. I gulped and stared at her lips. I wanted her so much. I nervously glanced at her lustful eyes. No one had ever looked at me like this, with so much adoration and intensity. It was all the motivation I needed to close the small gap between us.
Taylor didn't hesitate. She kissed me back immediately and let our lips dance together. My heart was beating so fast that it was ready to burst.
The kiss was intense. It spoke for us. I didn't want to pull back. I was putting everything into it. I wanted her to see how much I cared for her and how much she meant to me. There was passion, lust, relief, hope and love all mixed together. It was pure magic.
We eventually pulled away but I kept my eyes closed. I was still enjoying the feeling of her soft lips and her body pressed against mine. When I opened my eyes, Taylor was already looking at me, beaming. I stroked her cheek softly and remained quiet. I just wanted to look at her.
I had become addicted to her in the spare of thirty seconds.
"Penny for your thoughts?", she asked above a whisper.
"I feel so lucky right now."
"Yeah you should", she said seriously with a frown. I laughed and tightened my grip on her waist to press our bodies even closer - if that was possible.
"Do you regret this?", I questioned. She wrapped an arm around my neck to hug me and held on to the edge of the pool with the other.
"Not for the slightest", she whispered in my ear.
I'd never smiled so hard before. I was so happy. I knew we had a long way to go but I could already catch sight of the light at the end of the tunnel. Personally, I would never regret kissing Taylor Lawson and catching feelings for her. At that time of my life I could affirm that she was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
She pulled away and pecked my lips before offering to head back to the house as it was getting chilly outside. She asked me to spend the night which I gladly accepted. I borrowed a tank top and pajama shorts from her and took a shower in the bathroom closest to the living room before joining Taylor on the couch for our usual movie routine.
As expected, Taylor fell asleep on my lap while I stroked her hair. I continued to watch the movie and was so engrossed that I didn't notice she was actually awake until I felt a poke on my chin. I looked down at a smiling Taylor and grinned at the sight of her cute sleepy eyes.
"You wanna go to bed?", I asked in a whisper. She shook her head no. "Why not? Aren't you tired?"
"I am. But the view is too beautiful for me to fall asleep", she whispered.
She was fighting to stay awake but I knew that the only thing she wanted was to be in her bed. So I moved her in a sitting position, wrapped her arms around my neck and helped her up. Even though she was barely conscious, she held me tight and dropped light kisses on my neck while I carried her upstairs.
I laid her down on her bed and pulled the covers over her. Once I knew for sure that she was dead asleep, I kissed her forehead and exited the room, unable to erase the smile that was on my face.
I liked this girl so fucking much.