Tris POV
When I leave Tobias' apartment, I walk to the dormitory. When I walk in, most of the initiates—Dauntless-born and transfer alike—are crowded between the rows of bunk beds with Peter at their center. He holds a piece of paper in both hands.
Oh no.
"The mass exodus of the children of Abnegation leaders cannot be ignored or attributed to coincidence," he reads. "The recent transfer of Beatrice and Caleb Prior, the children of Andrew Prior, calls into question the soundness of Abnegation's values and teachings."
Cold creeps up my spine, and I squeeze my hands into fists. Having to listen to this the first time was bad enough. This is the second time I'm having to listen to the rumors that the Erudite make about my father.
Christina looks at me nervously. I shake my head, and release a breath.
"Why else would the children of such an important man decide that the lifestyle he has set out for them is not an admirable one?" Peter continues. "Molly Atwood, a fellow Dauntless transfer, suggests a disturbed and abusive upbringing might be to blame. 'I heard her talking in her sleep once,' Molly says. 'She was telling her father to stop doing something. I don't know what it was, but it gave her nightmares.'"
I want to scream, but it feels as if I'm frozen. I can't move, but when Molly smiles at me with her crooked teeth, I snap.
What?" I demand. Or I try to demand, but my voice comes out strangled and scratchy, and I have to clear my throat and say it again. "What?"
Trying to stay calm in this situation, but I have to. Otherwise, I might do something that could get me in trouble. I can't risk losing my place in the rankings, especially now that we have a plan.
Peter stops reading, and a few people turn around. Some, like Christina, look at me in a pitying way, their eyebrows drawn in, their mouths turned down at the corners. But most give me little smirks and eye one another suggestively. Peter turns last, with a wide smile.
"Give me that!" I scream, holding out my hand. My face feels like it's on fire. It's taking everything in me not to attack him.
"But I'm not done reading," he replies, laughter in his voice. His eyes scan the paper again. "However, perhaps the answer lies not in a morally bereft man, but in the corrupted ideals of an entire faction. Perhaps the answer is that we have entrusted our city to a group of proselytizing tyrants who do not know how to lead us out of poverty and into prosperity."
That's when I lose it. I storm up to him, trying to snatch the paper from his hands. He holds it above his head, laughing. I'm too short. I am not going to jump to get it. So, I do what any Dauntless in my position would do. I lift my heel and stomp as hard as I can where the bones in his foot connect to his toes. He grits his teeth to stifle a groan.
Then I look at Molly, and throw myself at her. I'm hoping the surprise will be enough to knock her down. Before I can reach her, cold hands wrap around my waist, pulling me back.
"That's my father!" I scream. "My father, you coward."
Will pulls me away from Molly. My breaths seem to have quickened, but I continue struggling to get the paper before I have to hear another word of it. I have to burn it; I have to destroy it; I have to.
I can only imagine what the rest of that article will say. I expect Marcus' name to come up. I expect it has something to do with the only other Abnegation to transfer to Dauntless. At least that story wouldn't be a lie. My father is nothing like Marcus.
But before I can do any more damage, Will drags me into the hallway. His fingernails are digging into my skin, but I'm too angry to care. Once the door shuts behind him, he lets go, and I shove him as hard as I can.
"What?" I ask. I know I'm yelling, but I'm making no effort to calm down. "Did you think I couldn't defend myself against that piece of Candor trash?"
"No," says Will. He stands in front of the door. "I figured I'd stop you from starting a brawl in the dormitory. Calm down."
I laugh a little. "Calm down? Calm down? That's my family they're talking about!"
"Tris." There are dark circles under his eyes; he looks exhausted. "I understand that they are saying things about your family you don't like but sadly, there's nothing you can do about what they say, so you might as well just ignore it."
"Were you even listening?" The heat in my cheeks is gone, and my breaths are more even now. "Your stupid ex-faction isn't just insulting Abnegation anymore. They're calling for an overthrow of the entire government."
Will laughs. "No, they're not. They're arrogant and dull, and that's why I left them, but they aren't revolutionaries. They just want more say, that's all, and they resent Abnegation for refusing to listen to them." Yeah. Right.
Will doesn't understand. The Erudite started a war. They will do anything for power, but I can't tell him that.
"They don't want people to listen, they want people to agree," I reply. "And you shouldn't bully people into agreeing with you." I touch my palms to my cheeks. "I can't believe my brother joined them."
For some reason, my heart aches at the thought of Caleb. I know that he did things that should be unforgivable, but I forgave him a long time ago. If I didn't, he would have went into the weapons lab instead of me. I wouldn't have had this chance to start over.
"Hey. They're not all bad," he says sharply.
I know that, but it's hard for me to believe after all that I've been through. In response, all I do is nod.
The door to the dormitory opens, and Christina walks out.
"It's my turn to get tattooed," she says. "Want to come with us?"
I smooth my hair. I can't go back into the dormitory. Even if Will let me, I am outnumbered there. My only choice is to go with them and try to forget what's happening outside the Dauntless compound. I have enough to worry about, like stopping this war, without anxiety about my family.
~~~
The walk back from tattoo parlor seems dull. Last time, Al was with us, giving Christina a piggy back ride. I just have to remind myself that it's safer for him to be factionless.
I got my Dauntless tattoo put back on my shoulder. I'm starting to feel like myself again. I'm starting to feel Dauntless again.
"I can't believe you got another tattoo," Will says, shaking his head.
"Why?" I ask. "Because I'm a Stiff?"
"No. Because you're...sensible." He smiles. His teeth are white and straight. "So, what was your fear today, Tris?"
"Too many crows," I reply, without hesitation. "You?"
He laughs. "Too much acid."
Even this time, I don't ask what that means.
"It's really fascinating how it all works," he says. "It's basically a struggle between your thalamus, which is producing the fear, and your frontal lobe, which makes decisions. But the simulation is all in your head, so even though you feel like someone is doing it to you, it's just you, doing it to yourself and..." He trails off. "Sorry. I sound like an Erudite. Just a habit."
I shrug. "It's interesting."
Suddenly, Christina stops and stifles a laugh. Will raises his eyebrow, asking a silent question. As an answer, she points behind me.
I turn my head, and I see him. Tobias is standing beside the chasm with a bottle in his hand with a group of people. I groan quietly, knowing what's coming.
"Uh-oh," says Will. "Instructor alert."
"At least it's not Eric," I say. "He'd probably make us play chicken or something."
"Sure, but Four is scary. Remember when he put the gun up to Peter's head? I think Peter wet himself."
"Peter deserved it," I say firmly.
Will doesn't argue with me. He might have, a few weeks ago, but now we've all seen what Peter is capable of.
I hope Tobias doesn't see me. Last time was weird enough, and he was nothing more than my instructor. What if he tries to kiss me or something?
As soon as I finish that thought, Tobias yells, "Tris!" His eyes brighten and he walks towards me. I look at Christina, and her eyes widen. Will seems confused. I don't blame him. There are three of us, and Tobias is only talking to me.
"Hi," Tobias says when he reaches me.
"What are you doing?" I ask.
"I came to see you."
"Oh." I'm just ready for this conversation to be over. I love talking to him, but not when he's like this.
I notice Christina has distracted Will by talking to him. I'll have to remember to thank her for that later.
"I'd ask you to hang out with us, but you're not supposed to see me this way." He smiles at me.
"Thanks Four, but I really need to go."
He frowns at me. It's obviously because I called him Four. He puts his lips next to my ear and whispers, "You look good, Tris."
Then he looks into my eyes and starts to lean in. Before his lips can touch mine, I push him away. "Not now."
With that, I leave. I hate seeing him like that. I can't be around drunk Four any longer.
I grab Christina and Will, walking away from my intoxicated boyfriend. "What was that about?" Will asks.
"What did he say?" Christina asks. As soon as the words leave her mouth, she presses her lips together. I guess she realized what she did.
"Nothing." I shake my head. "He was drunk. He didn't even know what he was saying." I clear my throat. "I don't even know what he said."
"Right," says Will. "Couldn't possibly be because—"
I elbow Will hard in the ribs before he can finish his sentence. Maybe he heard more than I thought.
"Come on Will," Christina says. "That's ridiculous. He's our instructor."
He nods in response, shrugging his shoulders. Thank you, Christina.
She winks at me and smiles when Will instead paying attention. I shake my head, chuckling quietly. Peace is restrained; this is free.
A/N: It's been a long time since I updated two days in a row. So there you go!