Anxiety
On extremely good days it's only a slight headache and a small churning in my stomach.
On normal days thoughts come exploding, scattering broken pieces of my clean and happy thoughts. Waves crashing around in my insides only intensify as I choke back the tears that threaten to spill. All this topped by the fact that I must resist the urge to throw up on the crazed mess that I am in.
But I look fine...
Happy...
Okay...
Despite the fact that I look happy my guts are screaming for me to let go but I can't .
There's so many thoughts, I can't keep my composure.
I feel like dying but
I feel like living.
Why is it so HARD
I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING INSANE!
WHAT IS WRING WITH ME?!
WHAT IS BROKEN?!
WHAT DO I HAVE TO FIX?!
WHAT IF I CAN'T FIX IT
I WANT SOMEONE TO HELP ME!
WHY CAN'T YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING
"I WANT TO BE FIXED"
"HELP ME"