Asalamoalaikum
Wanted to update in the past few days but wasn't in a state to. Sorry for the delay like I promised it to be.
Recap
* "Sahi hi toh keh rai hain. Ammi ka Shehry aisa toh nahi tha. Jesa bhi tha aisa toh bilkul nahi tha."
Saba didn't say anything. I wanted her to reply, to scream at me, to yell at me asking me why I did all this to her. But she didn't. Not even a single word.
Deep down it started eating me up. Why don't she? It's her right to ask me. *
P.S. I couldn't write something that huge and emotional, so I skipped one of the main events. I couldn't bare it. Sorry for a such a twist.
And OMG 700+ reads! 💖👍💪
Just go on and read it, happy reading.
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CHAPTER THIRTEEN
The house was quite. Everything went black since the say before yesterday. None of us said anything to each other. None of us cried in front of each other. None of us comforted each other.
The only sound I could hear was of us, just breathing. Deep down, we both cried alot, Shehryaar more.
Who knew the calmness we had that night holding ammi's hands, one me and the other Shehryaar was holding us for such a big storm the very next day. It was so shocking for us that the day ammi went to coma was her last day.
It was her funeral today and a lot of people were here at the house. Shehryaar's many known families were here, those who were close to ammi, her friends, their farther relatives who lived here I never knew. Every single person was here.
Par Khuda Ki Qudrat dekho, itne hajoom main bhi sab khamosh the.
(But look at Allah's Nature, there was still silence in such crowd.)
All of the families went to their homes leaving me and Shehryaar behind in this big house, alone. Both of us felt lonely, yet still there with each other.
Qareeb ho kar bhi qareeb na the, hmesha ki tarhan.
(Not close to being close, as usual.)
I wanted to console him, tell him not to break apart but that was also a thing I didn't wanted to do. Me breaking down in front of him might make him go deeper in this depression.
I want to talk to him but the fear of my cracking voice wasn't letting me. I really need to talk to him, we can't stay like this. I decided to speak something to him. Any random thing.
But what do I even talk about? What do I ask him?
Food. Maybe ask him for food.
I wanted to kill the silence between us.
"Ah Saba?" he spoke up before me, his head still down, sitting on the other side of the couch, totally away from me.
"Yes." I replied back instantly as if waiting for him to say something. Well I was.
He just looked at me at my response blinking his eyes once, twice with his lips slightly apart and then lowered his gaze.
"What happened Shehryaar? You want something?"
He immediately shook his head and covered his face with his hands in order to hide his face. I wanted to ask him again but my throat wasn't letting me. I felt there was no voice inside me.
"Ah- Sar (head)" he spoke up lifting up his face again cleaning up his teary face with his hands, and I looked at him dumbfounded, confused what he was trying to say. "Sar, my head, it hurts."
"Ah okay, I'll bring the tablets." I unfolded my legs as I was sitting cross legged to bring him some pain killers that aren't that harmful. I didn't properly got up when his voice stopped me.
"No, wait." listening to his reply I sat back properly gesturing him to continue. "Ah- Can you, ah- can you please... Umm, massage it? Just like ammi used to do?" I felt his voice cracking up at the end and that made me not to say a no to him.
"Umm, okay." I got up and went to the back side of the couch towards his side. He rested his head on the head side of the couch and I forwarded my hand towards his forehead. He closed his eyes before me touching his forehead and I could literally feel my hands shivering.
The moment I my fingers slightly touched his forehead I couldn't gather myself from not moving my hand back at the touch.
Ya Allah, how am I gonna do this? Why did I even say a yes to this?
"Saba? You there?" his voice made its way to my ears when I noticed he knitted his brows in confusion with his eyes still closed.
"Yea-yeah." I again tried to move my hands forward to his forehead calmly but his voice stopped me.
"Come back and sit."
"What?"
"Come here." he opened his eyes but didn't looked up at me. He patted the place where I was sitting before. "Sit."
"I'll do it Shehryaar. I just... need a little time."
"I know, come."
I went back sitting cross legged again looking up at him whereas he was looking at his hands placed on his knees.
"Umm do I mind if I... I put my head on your lap and then you can... Umm." he looked up at me and said, softly, his asking me for permission.
I didn't know what got into me and I nodded my head.
Are you kidding yourself Saba. You just couldn't touch him knowing well, and now?
He shut his and very gently put his head on my lap, adjusting his legs and the other body.
"it'll be much easier, you weren't much comfortable there. Sorry." he said looking up at me with his eyebrows raised and I nodded my head.
"Thanks, just do it for a few minutes." he whispered and shut his eyes calmly. I pressed my lips in a thin line and put my hands on his forehead. Slowly and with time I started massaging it looking at Shehryaar's features closely. His eyes were shut, his features were so calm unlike they were a few minutes ago.
He didn't show any movement. He's asleep I guess. I know he wasn't sleeping well for the past days so I let it be.
He's not hurting me anywhere that I stop him.
I sighed and rested my head from the right on the couch's head side and shut my eyes, inhaling the quietness we had.
"You know when I was little..." he spoke out of blue, followed by a fake chuckle. "Well not little, but just younger than I am right now." he opened his eyes looking into mine and then lowered his eyes to his hands which was placed on his tummy, my eyes followed his. He was fidgeting his fingers with each other.
"Whenever I was in sort of any stress, she used to massage my forehead, with my head on her lap, making me forget every sort of uneasiness or stress." he smiled but hurt and pain was evident on his face. A tear left his eye and I almost gasped.
"Thanks, felt the same." he got up.
"Umm... I'm going outside, don't wait for me, I might be late."
"Shehryaar, no, stay. You're not in a state." I protested.
"Let it be please."
"Don't you wanna eat something?" I questioned. He was already up, tugging his shirt straight.
I didn't wanna lie but he really looked fresh.
"No. Not in mood."
"Just a little, you haven't eaten since long." i said but he rejected my offer and shook his head.
"Thanks, but don't wait for me." with that he left me all my myself.
To be honest, I felt a tiny bit good, talking to him.
I sighed inhaling air and then exhaling it for a longer time.
°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
It was really late at night, it was almost 1am but there was no sign of him. I remembered he told me not to wait but I couldn't stop myself. I'm here all alone by myself.
How am I supposed to not wait for him.
I am scared.
Sitting in the lounge area where the entrance door was, I sat in the couch facing the door with my legs up on the couch as well.
I didn't knew when I drifted off to sleep when I heard a phone ringing badly.
A phone?
Whose phone?
I got up and followed the voice from where the phone was ringing. Pushing aside some cushions I found Shehryaar's phone ringing. The number was unknown so I went a little hesitant to pick it up.
Maybe it's important.
I battled with myself and finally picked up the call. Upon reaching the phone till my ears I heard Shehryaar's voice.
"Saba you there?" his voice was hoarse, it sounded like he cried for hundreds of years and then spoke up. It was thicker than it can ever be.
"Yeah." a silent whisper came out of my mouth which I wasn't sure he even heard it. He sighed in relief which indicated that he did heard me.
"Saba I'm... -" his voice was cut off by a large crashing sound which made me shiver and I couldn't even speak out of horror.
Shehryaar? Is he okay?
"Hel- hell- hello?" a strange stranded voice came out and a gasp left my lips when I heard people shouting.
"Is he dead?"
"He seems dead."
"Take him to the hospital."
"He's losing a lot of blood."
"Try and wake him."
"Call the ambulance."
These were the voices I heard from the other side of the phone. My eyes widened as I came to realise what has happened.
"Shehryaar!" I screamed with all my power.
"Oh someone's on the phone." another voice was heard.
My breaths went heavy and I couldn't comprehend what was happening around the world. The only thought that was in my head was of Shehryaar.
"Hello anyone on the line?" a voice was heard shaking me out of my thoughts.
"Hello." I replied with a shaky voice. Tears started flowing down my lash line.
"Um Miss whoever you are, whoever you were talking to, got into a severe accident. I'm taking him to the hospital and will inform you what hospital in a while. You please stay calm."
He spoke and I couldn't hear more. I cut the call and screamed as loud as possibly I could. I screamed his name. I screamed for him.
"Shehryaaaaar."
Author note: This update might be the last one for this month. Won't be updating till a very long time. Not that long though, don't worry. I'll be back soon InSha Allah maybe after the first week of May, or a little longer than that. But I promise the next updates are gonna be longer. Just felt like wanted to get rid a some tragic so I decided to post this chapter up.
I'm super super super busy with work and my exams too! 😐
And gimme loads of comments and votes, that makes my soooo much happy.
Till then, Allah Hafiz.