Book by MelodiousTwilight
Also remember that by commenting you have given me permission to give you constructive criticism.
Over all it was really good and non cliche, very good first chapters even though I was a bit confused, I don't really understand the part about the players. The main character was slightly cliche but it was not too much.
Over all 53/60
grammar 9/10- only a few mistakes wth speech marks.
characters 9/10- you introduced the main character very well, slightly cliche with how they're the only good ones in the whole business but that's fine.
plot 10/10- I've never heard of a book like it, great job.
book cover 8/10- It was alright, just maybe make the handwriting of the words the same or similar.
the hook to keep me reading 9/10- I liked the cliffhangers and the suspense of what was going to happen next.
the first chapter 8/10- well there were many chapters before the first chapter, a bit confusing.
Over all just check on punctuation when writing with speech marks, also I feel like it might be going into a cliche path so try not heading there.
This review was not made to offend you and thank you for your payment even though technically you have only half finished it.
Sunday 8.4.18