The latest comments and feedback I've received have really rekindled my love for this story😚😚 I'm not one to absolutely rely on the approval of others, but it's really empowering to hear the ups and downs of what I'm doing 💪🏻
~Silver
~~~
My new post is now the furthest away from everyone else—and to be honest I was more than fine with that. Not one of the crew dared approach me as I sat hunched on the tallest sail of the ship, brooding away at my shitty life choices.
The sea breeze seemed to be the only thing that could calm my fever, as well as provide some relief from the constant need to throw up what I'd eaten minutes before.
Once again, Atlas was proving to be the main cause of all the misery in my life. And to my hatred so was I.
"Althea, what do you think you're doing?" I call out, eyes plastered on the dim purple light that glows behind the sail to my left. "Come out, I know you want to talk."
The little girl, in all her metal glory, unveils herself from behind the thick white sail, hovering mid air with a look of nervousness before planting her butt on top of the opposite mast.
She's silent for a while, as if trying to collect all the questions in her head before deciding which one would be the best to ask first.
"You slept with my brother?"
Really. Really?
I shrug. "Yeah. I did."
"And now your going to have his baby."
"No, I don't think so." I grimace, the words sounding more cold than when I'd processed them in my brain. "Althea, I'm not ready to have children. I don't think I'll ever be. If you missed the memo from last night I'm a wanted criminal."
"So is my brother. You could raise your baby together."
"No!" I belt out, probably with much more force than I should have. I lurch backwards, the sickness arising again. "Atlas can't find out about it. He'll kill it."
"Isn't that what you're going to do anyway?"
I let the child's words sink in.
Lying one palm over my stomach, thoughts that I hadn't even considered possibilities begin to filter into my head. What if, by some damn astronomical chance, could give this child a normal life.
But normal was something that would never follow me around.
I'm a criminal. A murderer. How on Stellarum could I be expected to raise a kid? Up until a couple years ago I could barely take care of myself. What if-?
"You're overthinking it, Deam."
Althea's use of my true name brings me out of my repetitive stupor. Her eyes have calmed to their normal viper greens as she stares at me intently, watching my body's every movement.
"My mother wasn't cut out for children either. She was all bipolar, you know? One minute she was praising my brother and the next minute she was beating him half to death."
She shudders, unwanted memories from her early childhood arising. The feeling then melts like ice under the sun, a half cheery smile forming on her lips.
"My brother left me in the hole I called a home. I'll never forgive him for that. But you saved me, your taking care of me. I couldn't be happier here with everyone, and if your child is anything like you, or even Atlas—I'm pretty sure they'll be happy here too."
Everything seems to elucidate right then and there.
That's right.
If the child is anything like their parents, I'm sure they'll be fine.
"Thanks Althea."
"No problem."
"And I'm sorry, I guess." My teeth clench at the word, but I grit it out none the less. "For lying to you. And then kidnapping you."
"No worries. Thanks for giving me a niece or nephew—I've always wanted different siblings."
I choke at Althea's sentiment, only to be left in the dust as she swoops back down on deck in one graceful leap.
If my child is anything like Althea, I can bank on not being able to sleep for the next 7 years.
I think regretfully. Palming my stomach, I begin to make my way off the mast, only to find Merrick waiting for me at the bottom. He catches me as I leap off without hesitation, catching me under the arms before settling me on deck.
"You're gonna' have to work on your impulsiveness." He begins, only to be met by my back.
"How do you know I'm even gonna' keep it?"
"It's written all over your face." A soft hand cups my shoulder, stopping me in my tracks before spinning me the whole 180. "We'll take care of the child. Far away from Atlas."
I nod quietly, turning away to head towards a patient Ravenna who's waiting for me at the bottom of the oaken stairs.
With this choice comes a great danger. It came with every single worry in the world that included the name Atlas Solani. It's what this child is, no matter how far I try to run from him he'll always be here with me. That reason alone made me fear what it would become—like their father? Like their mother?
My parents were taken away from me when I was young—I barely know what constitutes to a 'loving' family, and frankly I couldn't pin anyone on this ship who did.
"Deam Caelis."
"Ravenna Legion." I roll my eyes. "So we're using the first and second names now?"
"I s'pose that's what you wanted." She snarls. "Considering you lied to us the whole time."
"So if I told you I was Randy Dandy from Candy Land, would that have made a difference?"
Ravenna at least has the decency to look slightly guilty—I guess I'd hit the mark. I breeze past her, not sparing a another glance as she calls out for me a second time.
"Wouldn't you be nervous if you found out you were trapped with a serial killer?"
"Frankly, for the past couple years all I've know is serial killers, maniacs and thieves. So no, it's not any news to me."
"You joined them. You had a choice."
"Ravenna," This time I turn around, increasingly volatile with the mention of willingness. "You don't know shit. In fact, you haven't even asked for me to clarify any part of my story. Don't assume that I joined the Nox willingly, because I didn't."
"Then why didn't you say that from the beginning?" Comes Baltazar, who crosses his bulky arms in one swift move before leaning on the railing of the ship. "And if you were unwilling, Lady Captain, why would it be that your bearing his child?"
I remain silent, only for the answer to come clear as I look into everyone's face. Osian and Ravenna, Baltazar, Coda, Indira, Althea and Merrick stand waiting for my answer. I clutch the railing, a realisation beginning to formulate.
"Because... I'm not Atlas."
"That's right." Althea backs me up, rocking on the railing. "She'll keep the baby, because she's nothing like my brother."
I nod, wrapping my arms around my stomach protectively. It's only then that the malicious faces begin to fade, all of them surveying me up and down as I draw closer to the banister.
"I... I need your help. All of your help." I admit, every bone in my body seething when I do. "I don't know the first thing... about raising kids."
"That's okay, Lady Captain." Indira perks up from behind the ship railing, hauling herself on deck with the help of Coda. "I don't know about the others, but in the sea we're always open to second chances. I'll help you raise the child, we'll give it a family better than the one I had."
"Damn it, Indira." Baltazar groans. "You're making it impossible to stay angry at her."
After a long time, I'm able to grin of ear to ear as everyone breaks out into relenting laughter. Patting my stomach again, my mind becomes clearer than it has in years.
You and me, kiddo. Our plan for world domination starts now.
***
Ran's POV
I watch him closely, just as the Boss had asked. But as of late, it'd become something I did by instinct—my friend had never been the same and never would be, and I realise that no matter how much I watch him that won't change.
"Spades," I draw him away from his tablet for a split second. "You should get back out there. The Boss wants us to survey the next dispatch."
"What's the point? Everyone knows the rebels are gonna' win." He says mindlessly, eyes still plastered to the tablet. "Just a few more minutes."
I sigh again, only this time it's caught in my throat as I walk behind him. My eyes land on the video he'd been so closely watching religiously over the past couple days.
"Spades! Slow down, for fucks sakes." Comes her voice from the speaker.
"I'm running circles around you, doggy." Comes Spades's voice from the tablet in response. "Keep up!"
"If your so agile, why don't you carry me the next kilometre?"
"I will then, lightweight."
I watch on the tablet as the camera angle shudders a second, facing the gravel road I notice as the outskirts of the Inner City. There's then a short squeak before the camera faces Spades again, with Deam on his shoulder. He's...
Smiling.
"What'd I say, little miss lightweight? Piece of cake."
"Put me down, Spades! I was joking!"
"She was never good at running long distances." Spades reminisces, putting the tablet down and shutting down the audio, not even looking at me as he speaks. "That's ironic, isn't it?"
"You heard the message she left. Kaiden repeated it loud and clear." I grimace, the words of the frantic twin forever embedded in my mind. "We killed her."
"No." Spades cuts in, raising his eyes to meet mine. "I killed her."
"She probably wouldn't take it personally."
"We were suppose to be best mates, that's what she called us. Then I went and acted like an ass then left her for dead."
"It's not your fault. Those were the orders from the Boss."
"Orders from the man that was supposed to love her." He grinds out. "How can you live with yourself, Ran?"
I pause, not even breathing. I shake my head, the answer only coming after the thought does. "I can live with myself because I know she's free. She's living the life she's making for herself, far away from us."
"Do you really think she's leaving forever?"
"Who can say." I shrug, trailing behind Spades as we continue down the dimly lit corridor. "But one thing's for sure. We'll be far different people when we meet again. Who knows, we may even get along like we once did."