AUTHORS NOTE- Holy crap you guys, two more chapters left after this. And just as an FYI, you'll hate me at the end.
Just sayin'.
After the arrow came sailing through the window, Loki and I went to go tell Frigga what had happened.
She listened carefully and added some extra security to my room as well as Loki's. There were now guards posted at both of our doors around the clock.
It made me feel a little bit better but not enough for me to be completely at ease.
And by some miracle, she had managed to persuade Odin to let Loki take the muzzle off. Finally.
That same night, we walked back to his room in a comfortable silence. Once we got there and locked the door behind us, he wrapped his arms around me and pressed his lips to my forehead.
"I missed doing that." He said, his voice still rough from not using it.
"I missed it too." I said, fighting through a yawn.
He chuckled. "Come on, lets go."
He led me to his bed where I slipped in without protest. I just felt like everything was finally starting to fit together perfectly.
He came up behind me a little bit later and pulled me to him so that my back was against his bare chest.
"We're going home tomorrow." I said simply. "I wish we could go back sooner." I sighed.
"Why? Do you not like Asgard?"
I considered it for a moment. "No, not exactly. It is beautiful, no doubt. But the truth is that most people here resent both of us fiercely. And after this whole... ordeal, I just want whatever sense of normality I can get."
He was quiet for a while before he spoke again. "Are you ok?"
I turned to face him. "Why wouldn't I be?"
He just shrugged. "Well, you've been through a lot. And I know what it feels like, to have someone twist everything you know." He had a strained look on his face, recalling a painful memory.
"And had you not gotten involved with me, none of this would have happened." He paused. "I'm not a good man for you to be with Jang. I'm not good enough for you. Whenever you are with me, danger will always be near." Sorrow was ringing clear in his voice, echoing through the room.
I realized he was beginning to doubt himself, to doubt me, to doubt us. He didn't think I wanted to be with him and that he hadn't truly changed into a better man.
Everything Loki had just said was a lie, and I knew it.
But I was afraid that he didn't know it.
"Don't say that, Loki."
He opened his mouth to protest but I just shook my head.
"Stop saying that. It's a lie and you damn well know it." I knew that the seeds of doubt would only grow if I let them. I had to stop it before it became worse.
"I don't blame you for what happened and I never will. Promise me you'll remember that." He slowly nodded and looked deep into my eyes, desperately trying to make sure I spoke the truth.
"And I promise you, that I will always fine, and that you won't have to worry about me. Okay?"
A tiny smile graced his features. "Alright then." He whispered.
I simled and nodded. "Get some sleep. We have a lot to get done tomorrow."
I quieted for a moment, feeling sleep starting to pull me under. "I'll be just fine. Don't worry."
I fell asleep before I could hear his reply.
I woke up again later that night to Loki sitting up in the bed. He was as stiff as a statue and looked like he was in a trance.
"Loki?" I whispered. "What's wrong?"
He turned to me abruptly. He looked surprised and confused to see me there. The confusion quickly drained away and left nothing but pure fury. His eyes were blood red and the blue was quickly spreading all over him.
"Why are you still here?" He growled.
"What?"
"You should have abandoned me, just like everyone else." He muttered a spell and shot a flash of green energy at the door.
He looked at me with hatred and lunged at me, grabbing my wrists above my head and slamming me into the wall.
I cried out in pain and became truly afraid. Not of Loki, but of the thing that was controlling him.
He made a dagger of ice and aimed it at my throat. I managed to block him with my arm but I knew I couldn't hold him off much longer. I looked into his eyes and saw that somewhere, the Loki I knew was there. I just had to find him.
"Loki. I am not using you, try to think!" He screamed and pushed harder on my arm, causing me to slip and fall to the ground.
"Why are you still here?! What do you want from me?!" He demanded.
"Loki! Please, stop it!" I could hear the guards banging on the door but I knew it was useless. Whatever spell Loki had used, it kept them from coming in.
I screamed as he launched himself at me with the blade. I turned my head just in time to avoid getting the dagger in my face. Instead it cut my cheek and the blade impaled itself in the wall by my ear. I screamed out in pain and felt tears rolling down cheek, stinging when it hit the wound.
This seemed to bring Loki back put of his trance. He looked down at me and looked at his own hand holding the dagger in horror.
His breathing became shallow as he realized what he had done.
"Oh gods." Was all he said. "Are you-" He reached out to touch me and I instinctively winced and recoiled away from his hand. I saw the panic forming in his eyes as I did so.
I roughly wiped the tears away and abruptly stood up, slightly shoving him in the process.
"I'm sorry! So so sorry!" He cried out.
"I'm going to stay in my room tonight." I walked over to the door and grabbed the knob.
I knew that he didn't mean to do it. And I knew that I was being irrational but I couldn't stand being here with him right now. I needed to be by myself for a while.
"I'll see you in the morning." I said, my voice as cold as the blade he struck me with.
He was scrambling towards mme, trying to apologize.
"Jang. Jang! No, please wait! I'm so sorr-"
I slammed the door and walked to my room before he could finish.
I stayed in my room that night but I couldn't sleep.
I could shake the feeling that what had just happened was the final nail the coffin.
I felt like something had just broken, I just couldn't figure out what.
LOKI POV
Idiot.
Fool.
Monster.
The words rang through my head after she had left.
Not that I blamed her.
This only proved that what I said before was true.
If she was with me, she would always be in danger. Always.
An idea came to me and I pondered it for a while.
If I went through with it, it would devastate me, but she would be safe.
If I didn't, I would be risking it all.
With a heavy heart, I trudged to my study, every fiber of my being dreading what I was about to do.
'It must be done.' I thought as I sat down. 'I have to do this.'
I could only hope I was doing what was best.