"Okay, take the cookie dough away from me..." Xander groaned with a hand atop his full stomach and the other holding a bag of chocolate chip cookie dough as he lied sprawled out on his bed. "I feel like I'm about to explode."
I felt on the verge of barfing my organs out.
"Maybe bingeing was a bad idea." No kidding Xander.
"I would have settled for solely your company." I rolled over on my side, instantly regretting that as I could feel the eaten contents shuffling around inside my stomach.
"Now that I think about it, that would have been a much better idea than being unable to move from my bed." Xander tried to sit himself up but failed greatly.
I tapped my fingers against the mattress to the beat of the music playing. Xander put on a top 40 radio station and I thought I had heard every song at least twice in the past hour. Of course, we skipped 5SOS when they came on. "How are you and Sofia?"
"We're great." Xander sighed. "I love her a lot. Can I say something outrageous?"
"Outrageous is what I live for."
"She's the one, T." Maybe he was just joking around. I mean, he was Xander. That was what Xander did; he joked around and that was why no one took him seriously. "I'm going to ask her to marry me soon." Okay, he was definitely pulling my leg or he was overdosed on cookie dough and it was causing him to say insane things.
"You haven't even been together for a year..." I could protest against this, right? It would be a logical thing to do. Someone had to have logic, if it wasn't Xander, then it would have to be me. I could talk some sense into him, have him wait it out for a few more months.
"Yeah, but I feel like this is right, this is perfect and I'm not letting her go. I could see myself growing old with her in a cute home." His lips pulled up into a blushing smile - or I at least thought he was blushing. It was always hard to tell the difference between his natural rosy cheeks and him blushing. People in middle school used to believe he wore make-up because his cheeks were rosy and his eyelashes were really thick, appearing as he was wearing mascara.
"Talia?" Dad walked into the room. "You have a visitor."
"I can't move, please tell them to come back in a month when I fully digest the junk I've eaten." I couldn't move but I was thankful my Dad interrupted this conversation because I did not want to live vicariously through Xander and Sofia's happiness at this second.
"They want to speak with you, now." He began looking through Xander's collection of CD's.
"Okay..."
"If it's Ashton, make sure to throw in a nice round of make up sex." Xander nudged me lightly before I slowly lifted myself from the bed. I rolled my eyes at the comment. Normally, I'd feel embarrassed towards Xander saying something like in front of my Dad but it didn't bug me anymore. I was immune.
"They're in the hallway..." Dad pointed out behind him, staring at the back of a CD case. I heard him ask a question about Nirvana as I was leaving the room.
The familiar tall blond quiff stood in front of me with open arms and his bottom lip between his teeth. This was very unexpected. My mind was racing through every possible thing that I could say wrong and he would regret coming over for whatever reason he came over for. But, I was taking his joyful exterior as a green light that things were okay...The fact that he even showed up was a huge sign that things were okay.
"Life is lonely without you, Kozma." Luke smiled into the awkward hug. It was one of those lame, one-armed hugs you shared with someone and were very unsatisfied with afterwards.
"I always seem to be fucking up with you, don't I?" I couldn't do a damn thing right when it came to Luke. He was always finding some reason to be upset with me or go days without talking to me. And I always forgave him. It was a process that needed to stop. I started to my bedroom, avoiding any chances of having a conversation in the hallway where Xander was able to hear. I was sure by now he figured out it was Luke and not Ashton, so he was highly disappointed and plotting a way to get Ashton and I to talk things out.
"Seems like it, yeah." Luke closed the door behind him, then made himself comfortable on my bed like he always did. Not caring if his scuffed Vans were getting my bed dirty. He sort of pissed me off, coming in here all casually like he didn't blow things out of proportion, like everything was all right. Like we were on good terms the last few months. He was almost like a PMSing girl.
"It wasn't what it looked like." I wanted to sit because it sounded a lot better than standing right now, but I was too anxious to sit and standing relieved some of the nerves. My nerves were telling me I didn't need to explain because Luke wasn't deserving of an explanation. Ashton was the one who needed me to explain exactly what happened.
"I know." Luke nodded. "Ric - Dick called me last night to tell me the truth."
"Wow." Dick might be a decent human being after all...maybe college had done Dick some good and changed his attitude.
"I was surprised myself." Luke propped his hands behind his head, crossing his ankle over the other, staring at the ceiling as if it was the most interesting thing the human eye could see.
"I'm sorry." Ashton was the one who deserved an apology, not Luke, but I apologized anyway because I was pathetic.
"Stop apologizing, can't you go a day without apologizing?" I wish I could.
"A day without apologizing will be the day that World War 3 sparks because I did not apologize for everything shitty in the world." I lied myself next to Luke, carefully running my palm over the locks that stood straight up. Sometimes I was tempted to shave his head in the middle of the night because his hair was insanely too high at this rate.
"You reek of sugar."
"And I feel like crap." I could always throw up on Luke and give him another reason to be upset with me.
"You look it, as well."
"Thank you, I can always count on you for your honesty." I tugged on his hair, earning a wince from him.
"My honesty is what you love about me." He boasted with a hand on his chest and a proud grin on his face. I loathed and appreciated his honesty.
"I don't think there's a thing I love about you, so don't get your hopes up, Hemmings." I teasingly scoffed. His playful expression fell to a hurt one, but was quickly masked back to the playful one, like he didn't want me to see his feelings hurt even if I was joking around with him. He looked better than the few times I had previously seen him. Healthier might I say. Still tired though.
"Glad to know." He shifted to his side. He had bags under his eyes that were probably worth less than a Coach bag and easier to tell they were real just by looking at them.
"How's Ashton?" I spoke before stopping my subconscious that desperately wanted to know if he was fine.
"Distraught, hurt, disappointed." He ruffled my hair, accidentally getting one of his fingers tangled in it. I grabbed his hand to stop him from making any movements that could potentially rip a good chunk of hair from my head. "He refuses to talk to anyone."
"Did you try telling him what Dick said?" It was worth a shot.
"Yeah, but he won't listen to anyone either. I think he needs to hear it from you." Like Ashton would really listen to me after I almost basically replayed one of his worst nightmares.
"I guess I'll have to make a trip to see him soon then."
"I guess so." Luke agreed. "This is the part where I apologize for being a complete douche the other day."
Luke was capable of swallowing his pride and apologizing?
"I think it's fine." I gave my best lying down shrug. I didn't want to argue with him so I was going to brush this off. "I was prepared for the worst. After Ashton and my Dad's reactions I wasn't expecting a joyful one from you."
"That's the problem." He groaned. "You shouldn't expect and be prepared for the worst."
"It's okay, Luke."
"It's not!"
"Luke."
"Talia."
"It's okay."
"I'm fully supportive of you taking this step and I will be here if you need anything. I will even fly up to see you if you ever need me." His habit of sticking a finger up one of my nostrils returned, it was a habit that failed because his fingers were bigger than my nostrils. It was also a disgusting habit.
"Thank you." I grabbed his finger, turning around to poke his own face.
"You're welcome." He chuckled, trying to dodge his own finger.
"I love you."
"As do I love you."
And just like that we were back to being okay until another thing fell onto our path, drifting us apart.