Two weeks it's been since Shayne and I's first sex encounter and one week since Shayne and I have even spoken to each other. It was driving me insane to know that him and I weren't talking and if we did, it was only for a quick minute and he would go back to work and try to avoid me. I couldn't deal with our friendship being affected after this. Not after all that him and I have gone through together.
For the past week, Anthony has still been making himself this "perfect" boyfriend to make sure I'm still in his life and it was starting to be a bit much. The fact that anytime I went into my office, there were roses sitting on my desk and then him bringing me food when I was slammed at work with editing scripts and videos. Though I do appreciate it, I didn't appreciate when he brought it to me and expected me to have lunch with him right away.
He's becoming this clingy boyfriend and I don't like it. That's not what I wanted from him.
Marissa and I were in my office uploading a Smosh Vlog where Courtney, Shayne, Olivia, and Noah play That Awkward Moment since recently, we had uploaded the video Anthony had came up with that day at lunch. That was very awkward for me to stand and watch since whenever I laughed at Shayne's jokes, I felt like I was committing a crime and I didn't know if it was okay since Shayne and I weren't speaking.
He ended this thing between us, but it ended our friendship.
We broke a huge trust in our friendship after fucking and it was like we couldn't go back to who we were before that. The dance didn't even ruin our friendship; I ruined it by fucking him. Three times I should add since I had initiated the first kiss every single time. But even though sleeping with Shayne is great, I just missed him. I missed our conversations, our jokes, our laughs.
I missed him.
"Everyone is definitely gonna get a kick out of Shayne saying ketchup," Marissa said with a laugh.
"I know I did," I said. "I-" I paused and put my hand on my chest to let out a burp.
"Whoa, you okay, Ronnie?" Marissa asked me as she placed her hand on my back. "That burp did not sound so good."
"Yeah, I think so. I-" I wasn't fine. I put my hand on my mouth and got up from my chair. I grabbed my little trash can that sat beside my desk and threw up instantly in it. Marissa quickly reacted and pulled my hair back as I got sick into the trash can. I spit a few times and sat the trash can back down. "Thank you, Marissa."
"No problem," she said as she put my hair down. I sat back down on my desk and put my hand through my hair. "Do you need me to take over so you can go home?"
"No, I'm okay," I said to her. "I don't know where that came from."
"You're stressing yourself too much about work, V," Marissa stated. "Here, I'll get some of this done. Just take an hour break and I'll help you out." She took my laptop and started walking out of my office.
"Marissa, you don't have too," I said to her.
"It's the least I can do," she said. "Just relax and enjoy the hour break. I'll come back if I have any questions."
"Thank you," I said to her. She smiled and nodded, then walked out of my office. I laid my head down on my desk, but only for a second since I heard my door open right away. I looked up to see Boze's smiling face. "Hey."
"Hey, you alright?" Boze asked me. "You're not looking yourself today an-" she started sniffing and gagged a bit. "What in the name of the hot lord is that smell?"
"Yeah, I should get this trash can out of here," I said to her.
"Get one of the guys to do it," she said. She leaned out the doorway and goes, "Flitz, can you take Veronica trashcan out of here? It's stinking up her office right now."
"Man, you expect me to do everything around here for you," he said as he was walking on. "Nah, I'm playing. Where's it at though?" I pointed and he grabbed the trash can. "Damn girl. You alright?"
"Yeah, I will be," I said to him. "Just think I have a little bit of a stomach bug is all. Nothing to worry about." Boze just gave me this look, but I kept my eyes on Flitz. "Thanks for asking though."
"Just looking out for my girl," Flitz stated. "I'll bring you a ginger ale from the kitchen, but before I do that, let me take this trash out."
"Thank you so much," I said to him. He smiled and walked out of my office while shutting the door. I looked back at Boze who was still giving me the same look. "What, Boze?"
"Stomach bug my ass," she said. "This is what happens when y'all have unprotected sex."
"I'm not pregnant, Boze," I said to her.
"Still missing my point though," Boze admitted.
"Anthony and I are always protected," I stated and got up from my chair, but placing my hand on my stomach. "I made sure of it because any birth control I've used in the past hasn't worked for me. It's caused me problems and that's why I have Anthony always wear a condom."
"He's not the only person you've slept with either in the past two weeks either," Boze pointed out.
"Shayne and I used..." but then it hit me. We hadn't used protection the first or third time. "Fuck!"
"Girl, look, I was just fucking with you and now I'm worried. Y'all didn't use protection, what the hell?" Boze asked me.
"We were so hammered that night that I don't think we thought anything of it," I said to her. She shook her head at me and I continued on. "I'm not too sure since I don't remember anything from that night; Shayne does though. We definitely used one the second time, but the third time was..." Boze backed a bit farther from my desk and all I can do is chuckle. "I'm fucked."
"And you and S-" Boze paused as the door opened back up to Flitz bringing me a ginger ale.
"Here you are, madam," Flitz said as he sat the drink on my desk.
"Well damn, why are you nice to her but not me?" Boze asked him.
"Man, you can be a mooch sometimes," Flitz joked. I giggled and watched him laugh as he walked out of my office while Boze shut the door behind him. I grabbed my ginger ale and opened the can up.
"Alright, back to business," Boze said. I sat back on my chair and sipped my ginger ale as I looked at her. "What are you going to tell Anthony? Or better yet, what are you going to tell Shayne who isn't talking to you at the moment?"
"Yeah, thanks for reminding me," I said as I sat the drink back on the table.
"Hun, what did you expect?" Boze asked me. "It was either that or you choosing to end things with Anthony. He made the right judgement call. It might not make you happy, but it's the only right choice for you guys at the moment."
"But to end our friendship, Boze?" I asked her. "That wasn't the plan. The plan was to stop whatever we were doing and we did, but look where that got us. We can't even look at each other without it being awkward. Our friendship has died which was something Anthony wanted all along." She sighed and looked down at the floor. "I gotta talk to Shayne."
"Ronnie, Shayne's basically avoided you for a week now," Boze admitted.
"But if I say it's important..."
"That's a big if."
"Then maybe he will stop what he's doing and decide to actually speak to me," I said to her.
"I guess it doesn't hurt to try, but I wouldn't bring out your ginger ale when you find him," Boze stated to me.
"I'm going to be making a big deal about this, I already know it," I said as I got up from my chair.
"You just had morning sickness, dawg," Boze said. "I don't think you're making a big deal about it."
"Okay, but that could still mean anything," I said to her.
"Fine, later on today, I'll buy a test for you, but you still need to talk to Shayne and put him on notice," Boze stated. "That's if he is going to speak to you."
"Well, here's hoping," I said to her. She opened my door and we both walked out together. "Do you have any idea where he is?"
"He should be Noah and Keith if I'm not mistaken," Boze replied. "But hey, I gotta get back to the group. Text me later, okay?" I nodded and watched her walk away. I took one deep breath, took my hand off my stomach and started making my way towards the office where they do "Show With No Name," to see if they were in there.
The door was already open so I did suspect somebody to be in there. In all honesty, I didn't know what anybody was doing today. Anthony and I hadn't talked much this morning since I hadn't been feeling well and when I don't feel well, I stay silent. He believes it's my periods and I don't disagree with him, but after throwing up earlier and Boze's remark, I think it was something I wasn't ready for.
Pregnancy.
I've always wanted kids and a big family, but not something like this. I'll never understand why I was given up, but I've always wanted to be a better parent than my real parents were. I could never imagine giving up a kid or even aborting a kid, but the thought of me having a kid now and knowing there's a possibility of it being Shayne's scares me more than anything. It's not that Shayne wouldn't be there for me, but it's the thought of how Anthony would respond and the cost of Shayne and I both losing our jobs.
Anthony would not accept Shayne working at Smosh if he found out I was having his baby.
It already breaks my heart for Anthony finding out what I did with Shayne, but I couldn't bear to think of how hurt he would be if this pregnancy is real. How heartbroken, how shattered, how disappointed he would be. He doesn't deserve any of this. Why hasn't Tristan or Boze lectured me more on this? I really just needed to talk to Shayne.
I walked into the office, and looked around to see Noah and Shayne sitting on the couch. I hated to interrupt their conversation, but this was really important and I knew Noah would understand. I slowly approached them and Noah looked at me. "Hey Veronica!" Noah exclaimed. I smiled and waved to him.
"Hey," I said to him. I look over to Shayne and he wasn't even making eye contact with me. My heart literally hurts when he does that. "I actually have to talk to Shayne about an upcoming video."
"Oh sure thing. I'm gonna see if Keith wants to get lunch. See you both in a bit," Noah said. I waved bye and he got up from the couch and walked out of the office. I watched him walk out and turned back around to see Shayne standing in front of me.
"God, you lie so bad," Shayne said while putting his hands in his pockets. This man could do anything and still be the hottest human being on this earth. It's literally ridiculous to me.
"What do you mean?" I asked him.
"You have a tell when you lie, Ronnie," Shayne stated. "Your nostrils flared so bad when you said you had to talk to me about an upcoming video."
"Impressive, Shayne," I said to him. "I just..." I started to lose my train of thought and I sighed. "I understand this was something we agreed on, but I miss you. It's just been hard not speaking to you when that's not what this agreement was on."
"It's just been easier that way," he said to me.
"For you, maybe," I said. "Never mind. I'll just..."
"I miss you too, Ronnie," he said to me. He gave me a small smile and I slightly smiled back. "But that's not why you came in here. I can tell by your eyes that there's something more to this."
"Right, um, I-"
Suddenly, the door opened up and Noah was walking back in. "Sorry to interrupt, but Shayne, Anthony called for an emergency meeting with Ian and the squad. Said it was urgent."
"Alright, I'll be out there in a minute," Shayne said. Noah nodded and walked out while Shayne looked back at me. "We can talk later. If I'm not able to, just give me a call, okay?" All I could do was nod my head at him. He patted my arm gently and walked past me as I closed my eyes and held back from getting upset. What has happened to Shayne and I?