It came time for the children to get new shoes and clothes, and so on Saturday, Levi drove us into town.
Minnie said that she had a project she wanted to work on, and I hoped that her claim wasn't just a cover for her feeling so badly that she couldn't make the trip herself. I certainly didn't mind the task, but I worried that she might not tell anyone if she was truly ill.
But the children were so excited. Bringing them into town was such an undertaking, that other than the weekly trip to church, they didn't get to do it often. Even Susan, normally so stoic, was delighted with the trip.
Knowing that the little ones' patience wouldn't hold long, I made sure that Mr. Noble fitted them for shoes first, and I had the older children look for the few other things that Minnie had requested while they awaited their turns.
I was watching Pheobe walk back and forth to get a feel for the new pair of shoes on her feet, when I noticed that a boy was talking to Cassie as she picked apples from the bin out in front of the store. The boy was probably sixteen or seventeen. He was tall and very handsome, and Cassie was smiling shyly.
Curiously, I drew closer to them, staying inside the store, unnoticed by either of the two. My instinct was to interfere, but I wasn't her mother and Cassie wasn't really a child. Many girls were married at fourteen or fifteen, which wasn't that far off for Cassie. And she did seem to like him.
"I bet you'd be real good at it," the boy said. "Maybe I could show you sometime. I've got an extra fishin' pole."
Seeming pleased, Cassie smiled up at the boy, but before she could answer him, two other boys about the same age, joined them.
"Afternoon, Cassie," one of them said.
Cassie was suddenly hesitant as she nodded in greeting.
"You ask her yet?" the other one said, slapping the first boy on the shoulder.
I would have thought that the blush crawling up the boy's neck was endearing if not for the mischievous look in the other boys' eyes. Somehow I knew his embarrassment wasn't caused by shyness in front of the girl he had feelings for. It was something else.
"Ask me what?" Cassie asked, curious but guarded.
"About our proposition," the boy on the left said. "You see, we wanna help you get started with your career."
"What career?" she asked.
The boy smiled cruelly. "Isn't it obvious? The only career you're any good for. The one that's in your blood."
Color flooded Cassie's cheeks and she lowered her gaze to the bin of apples, balling her hands into fists and clenching her jaw angrily.
"Joe here can't wait to be yer first customer," the boy laughed, slapping his friend's shoulder again. "And Ray and me will be in line right after him."
I wasn't sure if my revulsion or sympathy was stronger in that moment. I couldn't believe the cruelty of these boys to go through the charade of pretending the one had feelings for Cassie only to mock her.
A second later, I was beside Cassie, glaring up at the trio.
"Cassie, go on into the store," I said, placing my hand on her shoulder. "Mr. Noble is ready to fit you for your shoes."
She briefly met my eyes and I wanted to cry for the hurt and betrayal I saw in her gaze.
Nodding, she went inside.
I turned my glare back on the three boys.
"You ought to be ashamed of yourselves," I scolded once Cassie was out of earshot. "Speaking to anyone that way, let alone a little girl."
"Cassie ain't no little girl," the boy, Ray said with a lazy grin. "She's got the body of a woman now. It's about time she followed in her Mama's footsteps."
"Everybody knows them bastards ain't good for nothin' else. Least the girls ain't," the other boy added. "And Cassie's real pretty. Ain't she Joe?" He grinned.
Joe looked uncomfortable and his face flushed with embarrassment again.
My body shook with fury. These boys were exactly the kind who grew into the vile men who kept girls working in those horrible places, making them believe they were unable to do anything else.
"But of course," Ray said. "If'n you think Cassie ain't old enough yet, you could always take her place. We wouldn't mind none." He laughed and leered down at me, making me suddenly very aware that all three of them were much larger than I was.
They wouldn't attempt anything on a public street in broad daylight though. Probably anyway. They were just trying to intimidate me.
Standing my ground, I crossed my arms and scowled at them, wishing that their words hadn't made my cheeks warm.
"Yeah, ain't you stayin' with them?" the other one said before addressing his friends. "She's gotta be experienced."
"There a problem, boys?"
Levi was suddenly behind them, hands in his pockets and a stern expression on his face.
I was satisfied to see them cower slightly, just hearing Levi's voice.
"No," Ray muttered, glancing back at him. "We were just leavin'."
"Do that," Levi said, his disdain for the boys was obvious.
They slinked away, but not before I caught the apologetic look in Joe's eyes. I got the impression that perhaps some of his attention earlier had actually been genuine. Cassie was better off without him though. If he had a spine, he'd have stood up to his friends.
Once they were gone, Levi and I shared a commiserative glance before I went to check on Cassie.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After we returned home, the children couldn't wait to run inside and show Minnie their new shoes. All but Cassie. She split away from the others and went to sit on a log in the yard, looking as if she wanted nothing more than to be alone.
She'd been withdrawn ever since speaking with those awful boys, and other than putting my arm around her a few times, I hadn't been able to comfort her much without alerting the other children.
I made my way over to where she sat. "Mind if I join you?" I asked tentatively.
She smiled sadly and shrugged.
I was glad that she wasn't pushing me away, but her sorrow broke my heart.
Giving her a few more moments with her thoughts, I sat in silence beside her, wondering how I could help her. She was too smart to be convinced that what those boys had said was utter nonsense. It wasn't kind, but it wasn't completely untrue. Many times, children of prostitutes wound up becoming prostitutes themselves. It certainly wasn't the only option they had, but society definitely made them feel that way.
"Are you alright?" I finally asked.
"I'm fine, Miss Annie." Her voice was quiet and her lip quivered.
I put my arm around her shoulders.
"Don't you listen to those boys," I said. "They were trying to be cruel."
"I know," she said sadly. "But they're right. It's in my blood."
"That is nonsense," I said.
"My Ma works in a saloon and I don't even know who my Pa is... And I don't know... Joe is nice. And he's handsome... Maybe it wouldn't be so bad."
I was angry at those boys all over again for making her think this way.
"Nothing is in your blood, Cassie. No matter who your parents are or what they might do, no one can determine what you have to do with your life."
She turned to me, not convinced and a tear ran down her face. "I thought he liked me."
"I know," I said. "Boys can be terribly hurtful sometimes, but one day, you'll meet one who will truly care for you and who will love you the way you deserve."
An image of Levi's face flashed in my mind and I pushed it away.
"Do you really think so?" she asked hopefully.
"I do." I smiled. "You are beautiful and sweet and intelligent, and the right man will see that. Don't spend your time worrying about all the wrong ones."
She bit her lip and looked away, thinking, obviously still conflicted.
"Your mother may not have had a choice, Cassie, but you do," I said. "You have a brilliant mind and you can do so many things. You never have to be anything you don't want to be."
She gave a small smile. "I think..." She was suddenly shy.
"Yes?"
"I think I'd like to be a teacher one day," she said. "Like you."
My heart melted and I hugged her tightly.
"Then you will be," I said, vowing to myself that I would do everything in my power to help her accomplish her goal. Cassie wouldn't be like me though. She'd be a real teacher.
I still felt like a fraud sometimes. The children were learning and I suppose that's what mattered, but I never forgot that I wasn't an actual teacher. But if Cassie were to become one, I would be able to claim a part in that. Her accomplishment would be my greatest accomplishment. And it would be something that no one could ever take away from me.
Charles may not be a part of my life any longer, but there were times when he still had some control in my mind. Times when I felt the sting of his hurtful words all too strongly and I really believed that I was stupid and useless and many other things he would tell me. But an accomplishment like that would be something that I could constantly look to and assure myself that he was wrong.
"I promise, you will."