WHEN I stepped out, the rushed footsteps behind me were halted by armed men.
"Where are you taking her?" Rene shouted over their shoulders.
Odin ignored her as his hand suddenly found itself around my elbow. His fingers curled around my joint aggressively. My feet struggled to keep up with his pace.
Suddenly, I found myself in a small room surrounded by timid women. They gazed up at Odin in a submissive manner. No one dared moved until the fat man closed the door.
"Come sit." A young lady called out to me.
"What's going on?" I asked the fear filled faces.
One girl - barely the age of eighteen - reached for my hand. "Odin has asked us to prepare you for tonight."
As this girl spoke, the others around me began to wipe my skin with wet cold cotton towels. One then cautiously brought a small vial to my nose. I pulled away as soon as my eyes had met my reflection against the black liquid.
"No," I protested. "Don't bring that thing near me."
The girls quickly had their hands around me. Their cold fingers barley touching me, yet, were still desperate to keep me from moving away.
I stared at the girl who held the vial. My eyes searching for hers. She refused to make eye contact. I turned my gaze towards the other ladies around me. Every single one had their eyes to the ground. Their faces painted with regret and shame.
"Please Nightingale," I turned to my right. A thin framed woman whispered, her hands shaking against my shoulder. "Odin wants you to take a few sniffs. Please. We don't have a lot of time to dress you for tonight."
"You know what it does..." I muttered pleadingly.
The women in the room shifted on the balls of their feet - they knew.
"I won't tell him," I urged. "I promise."
"He'll know. He'll hurt us." One lady replied.
My heart fell, fully understanding the position Odin had placed them in. "Okay," I reluctantly agreed.
This lot of mendacium must have been more concentrated then most. One waft of air burned through my nostrils. My eyes clouded over, my head grew lighter, and my breath fell shallow.
The woman around me frowned apologetically.
"Nightingale," I heard a faint voice call. "I'm sorry. We're sorry."
I took a small breath, as my eyes met the gaze of another. "You have nothing to be sorry for."
~*~
The next few minutes after felt like a lucid dream. Gentle hands had stripped me from the charcoal covered garments, and had replaced them with a shear fabric. There were no sleeves, buttons or zippers. It was simply wrapped around me in a loose manner.
I staggered where I stood. The fabric flowed in compensation, barely covering my body.
My hands reached forward towards the nearest girl. Her young face looked into mine - apologetically.
"You're young." I whispered.
I watched her lips press. "Fifteen, ma'am."
"I'm not ma'am. I'm barely thirty."
She gingerly smiled as the other women hurried their tasks as hairdressers.
"You're too young for this evil." I stated through my dazed state.
"I have no one else."
I waved my hand clumsily around the women. "You have each other. That's all you need."
Suddenly, the busy bees around me stopped.
I blinked hard, trying my best to fight past the mendacium cloud rolling through my mind. "I know what you go through out there...your body f-feels empty. You...you don't know what to do. Or when-where to go. So...."
My head rolled back, as a I took a long sigh. The mendacium was putting up a good fight.
"Miss..." The fifteen year old, cried out as she reached to catch my heavy head.
I smiled in thanks. "White noise."
"Excuse me?"
I cleared my throat. "So you listen to white noise, when the men or women touch and pull at you. White no-noise."
Their gazes fell.
A quiet voice whispered in the back. "Sometimes I imagine a movie I caught a glimpse of when Odin had a guest come with a DVD."
Another chimed in. "I like to listen to what's outside. Sometimes the men are fixing the generators. The metal muffles things."
And another. "I pretend I'm acting in an old time play."
Another. "I sing a lullaby in my head."
And another. "I imagine them to be someone who has courted and swoon me over."
Another. "I count."
Another. "I listen to my breathing."
Another. "I keep my eyes close."
Until suddenly we fell silent.
The drug fog was beginning to grow stronger. But I reached my hands out, despite the nuclear waste's attempt of pulling me back into its trance.
"Odin may need you. But none of you need him."
Abruptly, with no remorse, the mendacium enveloped me into its dark grasp.
I felt soft hands cradle me into a safe seated position. My hair pulled back, my face was being brushed, cleaned and powdered, and my body adjusted against the fabric.
The lights through the fog changed colour. They were dimmed. Dark. Voices began to grow louder. Harsher. Hungrier.
"Nightingale," A familiar sound called out to me. Cold fingers curled around my jaw. A set of black lips cut through my dazed vision. Samil.
"Good gentlemen," Odin. "Please let me introduce my newest edition. Samil's Nightingale!"
Desire filled laughter echoed in front of me. Their voices seemed distant, yet I could just make out their silhouettes in front me me.
I felt a cold wind pass through the gaps of the fabric. I shook causing the covering around my shoulder to fall. A hungry growl escaped a man's lips in front of me.
"Odin," One man cried. "Where's the music."
Odin cackled. "My good man, aren't you blessed that you found the piano some months ago?"
The man laughed. "It's why I asked!"
Suddenly, a set of soft foot steps entered the room. I struggled to look up. It was the fifteen year old. Her red hair swirled up in a bun. Her delicate frame gently seated against the instrument. And more desperate grunts echoed from the men.
"My darling," Samil stated. "Sing."
I stared at the child. Her eyes locked in with mine, as she gave me a gentle smile.
Then a familiar tune played. An old song. Something someone else must have taught her. A song I had only heard through the broken lives of the war.
I'd heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
The mendacium caused my voice to shake. I shifted vulnerably.
Well, it goes like this
The fourth, the fifth, the minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
My voice grew a little more full. My diaphragm steadied. My eyes remained on the ground.
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Well, your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew ya
Just to the side of the chairs the men sat on, Samil gleamed in pride, in pride and lust. His eyes scanned my lips, watching every word fall out.
She tied you to the kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips, she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Suddenly, the men in front of me began to shift forward. Some leaned closer to the tattered, old baby grand piano, trying to take a taste of the player.
Well baby, I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I- I knew ya
And I've seen your flag on the marble arch
And love is not a - not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
I struggled to finish. My mind desperately yearned to help the girl. My body didn't listen. My legs grey heavier with each desperate attempt. My arms remains stiff on my lap. The shear fabric continued to shift, slightly exposing parts of me it shouldn't.
Well, maybe....maybe... there's a God above
But all I've ever learned from l-l-love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew ya
And it's not a cry that you hear at night
My voice was beginning to dim in volume, despite my desire to scream.
It's not somebody who's seen the light
My mind was beginning to fade.
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
I was left with nothing but my whisper, and my body slipping through the cracks left by my failed attempts to reach the girl.
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Then the world around me began to grow foggy from the mendacium. The men's laughter, and heavy sighs filled my ears. My body felt heavy. My skin shivered against touches I did not see.
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
And then, I was consumed by the cloud.