Chapter Fourteen: Secret
"I can't believe you're not done with that yet." Abby mutters, flipping through the channels on my TV.
"I'm almost done with the blueprints." I announce.
"And then you're done?"
"Yes." I laugh.
"You've been working on that for how many years?"
"Three." I shrug.
"Three years." She lets out a low whistle. "And, just out of curiosity, what happens when you have to have a house built for a family? Will it take you three years to draw up the plans?"
I scowl at her. "No. This one is taking me so long because it's my dream home."
"Whatever." She says. Her phone chimes and her attention drops to the screen.
"Is it your Mom again?" I ask.
"No, it's Grandma."
I sigh quietly.
"And what does she want?"
"She wants to know if you're going to go to the reunion."
I sigh.
"Abby, I already told you-"
"I know what you told me." She cuts me off. "But I'm telling you that your parents won't be there. It's not like your Mom's family is coming, just your Dad's. Nobody has seen you since the wedding, and you didn't really talk to anybody."
"Well I know that, but..." I trail off. "I've never even been to Wilmington before."
"Wilmington is really pretty." She insists. "Come on Grace, it's just one day. Plus, you and Danny don't work on weekends. We can get a hotel or stay at Grandma's."
"I'll talk to Danny." I mutter, putting the finishing touches to Danny and I's future waterfront home blueprints.
"Well do it now because the reunion is tomorrow at noon, which means we have to leave at like, six in the morning."
I glance at the time on my cable box.
8:52PM
I pick up my phone and message my boyfriend.
Me: I need to talk to you
His reply is instant.
Danny: lucky for you, I'm at your door
I hear him unlocking the door with his key and then he walks into the house and shuts the door.
Pepper springs up from her spot next to me on the couch and greets Danny.
He ruffles her ears and walks over to me, bending down to give me a kiss.
"So what do we have to talk about?" He asks.
"Do you have plans tomorrow?" I ask.
"I don't know. Do I?" He smiles and I can't help but smile back. He's so cute.
"Well we have this family reunion thing..." I trail off.
"I thought you said you weren't going?" He asks.
"Well..." I trail off. "I don't know. We don't have to go."
"I think you should go." Abby pipes up.
Danny crouches in front of me.
"I think you should go." He says.
"Well if you're not going, neither am I."
"I'll go." He says. "I love road trips."
"Well what about Pepper?" I ask.
"You can't bring dogs to the place we're going."
"I'll find somebody to dog-sit. Are we getting a hotel?"
"Yes."Abby says.
"I'll call Kyle." He stands up and disappears into my bedroom.
Kyle and Miley were our friends from high school. We really didn't stay in contact through college except for liking each other's posts on instagram and the occasional happy birthday, but that was it.
Then one day about six months ago, I was at the mall to get new shorts and I ran into Miley, who flipped out when she saw me, and I found out she's engaged to Kyle and the wedding is this October. I found out she and Kyle live here, and she found out I live here with Danny and we made a double date without telling either one of them who it was with.
Needless to say, we were out until three in the morning that night. We hang out frequently and I originally lived alone but Abby, who is my Aunt Vickie's daughter, making her my cousin, invited me to her wedding to her fiancé Tyler, and then he ditched her at the altar. She lived in Atlanta with her and was screwed and sobbing in the aisle in front of everyone and nobody really knew what to do.
Luckily for her, I've become genetically prone to family problems, so I sprung into action and pulled her off the floor with Danny.
She got ghosted by her fiancé and she hasn't looked at a man the same since.
She spent a week on my couch sobbing and watch Netflix before I forced her to leave the house and go with me to the mall. I kept dragging her out of the house with me until eventually she left alone. I told her she could move in if she split the bills and she agreed because the other option was moving back in with Aunt Vickie and Uncle Jerry. She got a job as a receptionist at a doctors office and she's doing better, but I don't even utter Tyler's name if she's in hearing range.
And my parents? I haven't spoken to them since I returned my phone. I heard a rumor from Abby that she heard from Aunt Vickie that the baby was a boy, not a girl. I don't know if they kept it or what they named it, and I've never seen pictures. Caleb and Beatrice, as far as I know, haven't spoken to my Dad since they picked up Dozer after that hurricane a few years back.
The baby would be around three years old now and I'd love to meet him or her.
I'd love to know the gender for sure, and maybe I can use this reunion as a way to trace the baby rumor down to the source.
Another thing too is whenever I hear about somebody else getting engaged or see marriage photographs, I get jealous. Danny and I have been boyfriend and girlfriend for seven years because I'm twenty four and so is he.
So I guess what I wonder every day is...what the hell is he waiting for?
Of course, I would never say a word to him about it. I don't want him to feel pressured. I know he'll do it someday. I just have to be patient.
I hear the bedroom door open and Danny walks out.
"Kyle and Miley are going to take her." He announces. "I'll drop her off."
He grabs Pepper's leash and I stand up.
"Can I come?" I ask.
For the first time ever, he hesitates.
"Of course you can come." He says a moment later. He looks at Abby. "Are you coming too?"
"No, I'm going to pack."
"Alright." He says.
I slip my feet into my sandals and grab the tub of Pepper's dog food and her bowl. Danny takes the heavy tub and hands me Pepper's leash, walking out the door.
I follow behind him, watching his ass through his jeans as he walks.
What? He's attractive.
When we get in the truck, my mind drifts to the hesitation he had when I asked if I could come, and he backs out of the parking space and I turn to him, opening my mouth to question him about it.
After a moment, I close my mouth and stay silent.
"What?" He asks.
"Nothing."
"There's something." He says. "What is it?"
"You just..." I clear my throat. "You just didn't seem like you wanted me to come with you."
He stops at the stop sign and turns to me.
"I want you with me every day." He says.
So why isn't there a ring on my finger?
"Okay." I shrug.
"What's the matter?" He asks.
"Nothing."
"Grace, what's wrong?"
"Nothing." I repeat. "I'm serious. I'm fine. Just nervous about tomorrow."
"Everything is going to be fine." He says. He leans over to kiss my cheek and then begins to drive again.
Maybe I should mention I want a ring? But if I mention it and he has plans, he might feel like I think he's doing it because I asked him why he hasn't yet.
I know it's best for me to stay quiet, but what if I stay quiet and he doesn't propose for years?
I don't want to wait years. I'm impatient. I want to be married before twenty six and have kids by twenty eight, thirty at the latest, yet Danny knows that.
I'm already twenty four and I'll be twenty five in five months.
We have one year and five months before I miss my lifetime deadline, and I know people say not to plan out your life, but I do it anyways.
And while it won't be the end of the world if I miss my deadline, it's not going to be the greatest thing ever either, and I'm probably going to spend my twenty sixth birthday crying or upset.
I stare at my bare left hand and sigh silently.
"I know there's something upsetting you and I know it has to do with me." Danny says suddenly. "So whatever I did, I'm sorry."
"It's fine." I grumble.
"So I was right! I did something wrong!"
"Danny, no."
"You just told me it was fine." He says. "Which means that I did do something."
"Baby, don't worry about it." I say softly. "I'm fine."
I know he's frustrated that I won't tell him what he did, but it's not really about what he did, it's about what he didn't do.
He sighs and stays silent the whole ride.
He shuts the car off in Kyle's driveway and gets out. I get out too, walking Pepper to the door. Danny gets the tub and the food bowl and I knock loudly.
He probably wouldn't care if just walked in, but I really don't want to see Kyle naked, because Miley is here and there's a possibility that they're having sex.
After a few seconds, Kyle pulls open the door and steps aside.
"Hey." He says.
"Hi." I say. Danny just grumbles in response and walks into the house from behind me.
"What crawled up your ass and died?" Miley asks him.
He just shakes his head and drops the tub on the counter, and then he turns to Kyle.
"I need to talk to you."
Kyle just sighs and walks into the bedroom, Danny following him. They shut the door and lock it. Miley rubs her arm and my eyes land on her engagement ring in envy.
"What's wrong with him?" She wonders.
"He's mad because I won't tell him why I'm upset."
"Why won't you tell him?" She asks.
I glance at the hall and drop my voice to a whisper.
"Because it's about getting engaged and I don't want him to feel pressured."
Her eyes fill with realization.
"Okay, I get it now." She laughs a little. "I'm sure he's going to do it."
"Yeah, one day six years from now." I mutter. "If you tell Kyle, tell him not to tell Danny."
"Okay." She says.
The door to the bedroom opens and both boys come walking back into the living room, causing Miley and I go to silent.
Danny looks between the two of us.
"Did she tell you why she's mad at me?" He questions.
"She's not mad at you." Miley says.
"But she told you something." He presses, and then he looks at me. "I just...you tell me everything. I'm hurt that there's something you aren't telling me."
"I want to have sex." I lie.
Both of his eyebrows raise.
"What?" He asks.
"Nothing." I turn to Miley and Kyle. "If Pepper starts walking around or going to the door, she has to go out. She won't go in the house and if she howls or something either somebody is at the door or she has to go out. Just feed her in the morning and at night, and she might act like she's still hungry but really she's just fat and she'll eat until she pukes. If you need me, you have my number."
"Okay." Kyle says.
They know we're waiting until marriage. Everyone we're close with knows. Obviously Miley knows I was lying but Kyle doesn't, and he looks surprised.
And Danny looks shocked.
I ruffle Pepper's ears and walk out. I hear the door shut a moment later, and inside, I'm panicking.
What if I just said I want to have sex and he actually says he wants to also? How the hell am I going to stop him? Sure I want to have sex, but I want to have sex on my wedding night!
He unlocks his truck and I get inside before he can stop me. I put my seatbelt on and text Abby.
Me: dude I fucked up help
Abby: what happened
Me: you know how ive been impatient to get engaged? I slipped up and made it obvious I was frustrated with Danny and he keeps asking what was wrong so I lied and told him I want sex
Abby: dude what if he tries to stick it in? You're fucked both literally and metaphorically
He gets in the truck and I quickly lock my phone and stuff it under my leg.
He doesn't say anything, he just turns the car on and starts to drive.
Every time he stops, he glances at me but I pretend not to notice.
After a few more minutes, the truck rolls to a halt in the parking spot by the stairs up to my second story apartment.
"Are you going home?" I ask quietly.
"Yeah."
I nod.
"Thanks for dropping off Pepper."
"You're welcome."
I unbuckle my seatbelt and pull my phone out from under my leg.
"Alright. I guess I'll see you in the morning."
"Okay."
I force myself to reach over and open the door. I get out of the car and walk towards the stairs.
After a second, I hear his engine stop and his door close.
"Wait." He says.
I stop walking and turn around.
He comes to a halt in front of me, gently taking my face in his hands. Our eyes lock and he studies me. I feel like he's scanning my soul.
"You and I agreed a long time ago that we were going to wait until we got married." He whispers. "And it's not that I don't want you in that way. I do, but I can't. I want to wait."
"I know." I mumble.
"Okay?" He asks.
"Yes."
He leans down and kisses me softly, and then he pulls away.
"I love you." I whisper.
"I love you too." He kisses my forehead and stands back. "Let me know what time we're leaving so I can make sure I'm ready."
I feel sadness that he isn't staying the night, but I nod anyways.
"Okay." I whisper.
He kisses me again and walk back to his truck.
I sigh.
How am I going to keep hiding my secret feelings?
*****
So I know you guys wanted a smaller time gap but this is necessary :)
~Sam