The next day at school was tough.
I'd spent the whole night mulling over ways to get over Will but the moment I laid eyes on him the next morning in Homeroom, I knew it would be no easy task. He'd swapped seats with some blonde girl I'd never spoken to before - clearly in order to get away from me - but that didn't stop my eyes from landing on him the moment I entered the room. He was slumped over his desk, sketching away in his book with his eyebrows partially narrowed and his forehead creased in concentration.
My head swam with adoration as I watched Will's hand glide across the paper with his hair gently falling into his eyes. With every second I stood just observing him work, I felt myself falling deeper in love with him despite my intention being the exact opposite. How on earth could I ever not love him?
A deep cough rumbled from behind me, alerting me to the presence of Mr. Richmond and snapping me out of the trance I'd wound myself up in by watching Will. "Are you going to take a seat any day soon, Mr. Wheeler?"
"Yeah...erm...yes...sorry." I muttered, rushing towards my seat, all too aware of all the numerous pairs of eyes on me and also on Will. I saw Will's head lift up and the blush that tinted his cheeks as he realised what had happened. Just before I sat down, he locked eyes with me and glared at me before carrying on with his drawing and the embarrassment I was feeling slid into an overwhelming sadness that was eating me up whole.
Will managed to successfully avoid me all day after that and he and Max didn't even turn up to lunch. My heart ached with desperation just to see his face once more but the lonesome path and the pang of longing stretched on and on as, by the time I was cycling home, I hadn't so much as caught a glimpse of him since that morning.
"What's the matter, honey?" My mother asked over dinner. "You haven't spoken much all night. Me and your father are concerned. Isn't that right, Ted? Ted? TED?"
"Huh?" My father grumbled, pausing the journey of his fork halfway to his mouth and looking up at my mom with a bewildered expression.
"Nice." She huffed before turning back to me. "Are you still unwell? Maybe you shouldn't have gone into school today."
"No, Mom. I'm good, I'm fine. I swear it." I lied through my teeth but Nancy looked up at me in concern and I knew I hadn't fooled her at least.
"Are you sure, you've been awfully qui-"
"How's the chicken, Dad?" I asked, cutting her off and hastily changing the subject.
The remainder of dinner passed without another person bringing up my behaviour but, afterwards, Nancy dragged me into the living room and asked me what was wrong.
"It just feels so wrong, I haven't spoken to Him all day and only saw Him once. I feel like a piece of me is missing and like I can't be myself." I told her truthfully, I knew lying to my sister would get me nowhere.
Nancy was silent for a second, thinking things over. "Maybe you should go to his house. You know...as a friend."
"I'm not sure if He's ready for 'friends' right now." I said sorrowfully.
"You never know unless you try."
"Maybe I will." I told her and she smiled at me. Hurrying out of the house, my heart no longer standing the separation, I told my mom I would be back in a couple of hours before hopping on my bike and peddling off.
This is such a bad idea but I just can't help myself.
My heart lodged itself in my throat as my feet thundered on the pedals of my bike, urging the wheels to spin as faster and faster. My chest tightened more and more with every yard closer to Will I travelled and my mind reeled almost as quickly as my tyres span with thoughts of will he even speak to me? What do I say to him if he does? What if Joyce slams the door in my face? Panic was settling into my bloodstream but I was already set on seeing Will and couldn't have forced myself to turn back even if I'd tried.
The wind whistled through the leaves of the trees as I sailed past them and down the winding, endless streets. Finally, I arrived in front of the little house I was so familiar with just in time to see the front door open and a tall, dark-haired boy in thick glasses stroll out. "See ya later, Will." He called as he waved goodbye to the boy standing in the doorway. Suddenly, he caught my eye. "Mike?" He asked.
"Oh..erm. Hey, Rick." I muttered awkwardly as Will gaped at me in shock.
"Yeah, it's nice to see you again. I was just leaving so if you two lovebirds are wanting some alone time to get down and dirt-" Rick began whilst winking but was cut off by the boy I loved.
"What the hell, Rick?!" Will snapped and I felt my cheeks grow hot as I shuffled on my feet, embarrassed.
Rick chuckled. "No offence meant, I assure you. Anyway, just call me whenever, okay? I'm always up for a talk, you know that."
"Yeah, I know. Thanks."
"No problem, William." Rick smiled, ruffling Will's hair and the smaller boy rolled his eyes at the use of his full name. "I'm off. See ya later, Mike."
"Yeah, erm, bye." I replied and watched as Rick climbed into his dark-coloured, beat-up, old car and drove away, head-banging and singing along to some heavy-metal music blasting from his radio. I turned back to Will who was standing with his arms crossed, waiting expectantly for me to explain myself. "Er...hi."
"Hi?" He replied, almost like a question, in an annoyed tone of voice.
"I needed to see you." I whispered. Mentally, I cursed myself for once again being so honest. The whole reason I was there was to tell him I had let him go so we could move on and be friends again and already I was off to a bad start.
"Well, I thought avoiding you would have made it clear that I don't want to see you but I guess not." Will huffed.
"I wanted...I want to tell you something. There's something I have to say." I opened with and it looked as though Will was about to interject so I ploughed on before he had the chance to stop me, "I wanted to apologise for all the hurt I've caused you in these last couple of months. I never meant to make anything harder for you after everything that happened with Alex and stuff. My timing was so far off and you needed me to be a friend but I tried to be something more than that when that was the last thing you needed.
So...I'm just sorry, okay? I'm really sorry. That's why I'm here, to tell you that I will be the guy you do need. I can be the one to help you get over all the shit that you're going through the way I always used to be; I can be the one to pick you up when you feel like you're falling down; I'll always be there for you as a...friend. Nothing more.
Please, Byers. Please can we forget everything that has happened between us recently and go back to the way we were before all of this? Please, I need you to be my friend again." Breathing heavily, I finished a speech I hadn't prepared but once I had started it rolled off my tongue without needing any thought whatsoever. My subconscious must have known exactly what it was I needed to say and planned it all out for me.
Will gazed up at me with round, glistening eyes as he answered my plea for friendship. "I don't know, Mikey. I don't think that's good idea. If you...if you still have feel..." His gentle voice tailed off and I could tell he didn't want to put it into words.
"If I still have feelings for you?" I finished for him and he nodded. "You made it clear to me that we are never going to happen and I'm not going to push it. I understand that completely and I've decided, for both of our sakes, to let you go and move on. All I want is to be your friend again. I don't have any other ulterior motives, I'm not trying to trick you or deceive you about my intentions in any way. It may not be an instantaneous thing but I'm going to let you go romantically so I can still be in your life and we can go back to being hopefully the best of friends. Is that okay with you? Would you want that?"
Will's face broke into the brightest smile I'd seen on him for months and I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes at my own self when my heart felt like it had grown to three times its usual size and exploded within my chest out of sheer love. I'm going to have to get that under control if I want to move on.
"I really want that. I want to be your best friend again too!" He gushed and I felt relief completely wash over me. Steve had been right, I wouldn't have to say goodbye to Will. We would find a way to make our friendship work.
Grinning from ear-to-ear, I teased him: "Well then can you let me in your house? It's fucking freezing out here." Will giggled and stood to the side, leaving a gap for me to enter before shutting the door behind me.
The night passed by in a blur, the both of us so caught up in one another as we sat on Will's bedroom floor that we didn't even see the sun set nor realise the time. Since we were little kids, we'd spent almost every waking moment by each other's sides and the distance that had grown between us physically and emotionally had taken its toll and had led to us both feeling completely lost without the other. Just speaking and laughing with him about meaningless things - like old times - made me feel slightly more like myself and I could tell he felt the same. That night, we found that the missing parts of ourselves were each other and we spent the rest of the night piecing each other back together until Joyce came in and said my mother had been on the phone, frantically asking where I was.
Cycling home, I realised that Will having been such an important part of my life for so long meant that we would never be "just friends", we were connected and bonded deeply with each other. Though it had given it a good go, this world could never tear us apart. We would always rise stronger.
Even after climbing into bed and closing my eyes, a smile put there by Will never once left my face.
*
Pretty sure this is the cheesiest shit I've ever written in my life, good god.
BUT WILL AND MIKE ARE FINALLY FRIENDS AGAIN AND I'M GLAD!
And also, Rick was back for a fleeting second because, well, I missed him. He's not really relevant to anything but I like that guy so here he is.
And what is this? A NOT depressing chapter? Wtf. Who are you and what have you done with Niamh, am I right?
Hope you enjoyed 😊
- Niamh.