From: Max Durant
To: Emma Blake
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two things.
December 25, 2012, 4:37 PM
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1. merry xmas sweetheart
2. do you want to have dinner with leo and mia sometime this week? they're in town and said you had spoken to them about it
i'm really hoping this counts as a group outing...
okay, bye!
beso!
From: Emma Blake
To: Max Durant
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Re: two things.
December 26, 2012, 11:02 AM
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1. merry xmas to you too max
2. thanx for the invite but i can't right now. i'm really sorry. hope you understand.
also hope you're feeling better...
xx
Max contemplated for days whether to respond to her email, but at the end decided it was best not to. She obviously still had things going on with Roy and didn't want to add more stress in her life. The only reason he wrote her in the first place was because Leo and Mia kept on talking about it and pushed him to do it in the end. They said she obviously cared about him if she showed up at his apartment and looked after him. But he wasn't sure if it had been more over guilt and wanting to find out what had happened before facing Roy. He wouldn't know for sure until he saw her again.
So he decided to wait the full two weeks until school resumed. He tried to hide his excitement as he saw her walk into class looking like a damn supermodel, but that quickly faded away as she brushed by him without as much as a glance in his direction. Feeling like an idiot, he went to take his seat, convincing himself she was trying to be discreet about the end of last semester.
Days turned into weeks and her silence simply continued. It wasn't as if he had any excuse to talk to her either, they were now in different study groups so the only time he got to see her was during official class hours. He wracked his brain with ways he could get her alone again but came up short every time. His mind flirted with the idea of doing something to piss off Roy again. That would certainly get her attention. But then he thought about what that would do to her and concluded he was becoming a desperate idiot.
He followed her outside after class one day during a moment of weakness. He had absolutely no idea what he would say to her without sounding like a moron, but he went after her nonetheless. What could he possibly tell her after all this time? Hey, remember me? Right. Real smooth, Max.
He was about to approach her when Tony suddenly got in his way and stopped him.
"Not a good time right now, Tony," he said trying not to be impolite. The guy had saved his ass back in December. If it weren't for him, he would have ended up in a ditch somewhere that night.
Tony ignored him and pushed him towards the side, out of Emma's path. "Trust me, bro."
He was about to tell him off when he saw Roy approach Emma and wrap his arm around her neck, leading her away from campus. His blood boiled in anger at the sight.
"You blind? You wanna get killed this time? You not thinking man," Tony said.
Max sighed and looked back at Tony. "Thanks, Tony. I just don't know what to do anymore."
"It simple. Forget her. Look around. There plenty of other girl here. I hook you up."
He shook his head and clasped him on the shoulder, not believing this guy was his only friend in school at the moment. "I'll catch you later, Tony."
Max went home that day and immediately changed and headed towards the gym. He needed to let out all his frustration somehow. After two hours of letting his lungs burn and the sweat drip down his body, he didn't feel any better. So he did the only other thing he could think of and called his brother once he got home. If anyone had any advice on this subject, it would be him.
"Leo, I need help. Pronto."
"Shit. What happened this time? Did you get your ass kicked again? Did you at least try the left hook I showed you?"
"No, nothing like that. At least, not yet," he said sighing into the phone. Why did everyone think he was a freaking time bomb? "It's Emma. She won't talk to me, bro. I don't know what to do."
"How long has it been?"
Thirty-nine excruciating days, he thought. "About a month, I think."
"Okay, that's not entirely bad. Listen, if I ever learned anything from Mia is that chicks need time. I know it blows, but you gotta wait it out. You know the guy is gonna fuck something up sooner or later. That's when she'll come running to you and this time you seal the deal."
"Bro, she won't even glance in my direction. It's like I'm a ghost or a fucking leper around her. Even if she does feel something like you say she does, what the fuck do you know? How does she hide it so damn well? Like she doesn't give a shit. I'm drowning over here. I can't even think about banging some chick because I don't want anyone. Just her. Man, I sound as pathetic as you were."
"Uhm, first, that's offensive and two, now you know how it fucking feels. Yeah, it's tough. Girls are just better at that stuff for some reason, I don't know why. Trust me, if she does care about you, and I think she does, she probably acts all smooth in front of you, but goes home miserable. How do you know she's not crying herself to sleep every night?"
"How could I possibly know that? She gives me zero indication of anything. What gives her any right to treat me like this? I hit on her, like anyone else probably would, but she let me in. Fuck. Would've just been easier to be rejected in the beginning or if she had left that fucking horse tranquilizer boyfriend of hers and just stay with me. But no, now I get the fucking cheese grater treatment."
"Max, if you're done feeling sorry for yourself...you have to act 'as if'. As if that shit don't affect you and you got your shit together. Even if you don't. You're my big brother. If it were the other way around you would have bitch slapped me by now. So, I don't know what to say. Tough love. If it doesn't work out...just fuck it. Let her have Satan's babies with that fucking meathead. Listen, I gotta run. I'm supposed to meet up with Mia like 5 minutes ago. She signed us up for some sushi class."
"Okay, that does sound like you. Alright. I'll use the weekend to regroup. I'll read some 'don't kill myself' books," he said humorously.
"I thought you said those weren't yours," Leo joked at the Wedding Crashers reference.
"They're not, they're from a friend of mine...but I glanced at it."
"Okay, Owen Wilson. Let me know how it goes. I'm out."
"Later."
Max hung up the phone feeling slightly better, but still needed something to calm down. He thought of what Leo had said about Emma possibly putting on an act. Could she really be feeling differently inside? People never really knew what happened behind closed doors. Sometimes he wished he could be a fly on the wall to know what was really going on with her. Then again, he most likely wouldn't want to see certain things. It made him sick to his stomach just imagining her with Roy naked together and then just rolling around in the bed, laughing about him, ridiculing him...and had to slap himself to get the awful pictures out of his mind.
When that didn't work, he picked up a magazine from his coffee table and started flipping through it aimlessly just to distract himself. Mia must have left it when they stopped by a few weeks back. After seeing nothing but celebrity couples he wasn't interested in, he threw it back on the table and then ended up tossing everything from the table onto the floor in exasperation. One of these days, he really was going to lose it.
After taking a few deep breaths to calm himself, he went to pick everything up and place it back on the table. The last thing he picked up was the damn magazine. He was about to throw it out when he saw it had opened on the horoscope page. Feeling like this could be his last resort, he looked up the Cancer section and read it.
Slow down! Take some time for yourself to really think things over. There's a dimension of the current situation that you're not considering. Steel your resolve to pay attention to small things. Remember that nothing is entirely lost and the less you try to control, the better. Someone from your recent past will show up unannounced so be prepared. The most wonderful opportunity in the world will present itself to you; something you've long desired will fall your way. It's up to you to take it to the next level.
Max was not one to really believe in the whole horoscope thing, but this one really hit the nail in the head. He felt his entire body relax and he slumped back on the couch, reading his horoscope for a second time. It was so stupid that it was actually coming from this, but suddenly he felt a whole lot better than he had in weeks. If this thing was right, something in his future was about to take a turn.
*****
"Max, can I have a word with you?"
He had been sitting quietly by himself reading a case study in the school courtyard, when Roy's booming voice pierced through his brain.
Max immediately stood up trying to get away from him and knocked down his chair in the process. Fuck Max, way to hold your ground.
"Relax, I'm here to talk," Roy said.
God, what had he done this time? Had Roy caught him staring at Emma a certain way? Max looked around him, trying to look for witnesses in case he needed them. He did spot a few people around them before looking back at Roy distrustful.
"Dude, it's the middle of the day and we're on campus. Give me some credit. I'm not that stupid," Roy said taking a seat in front of him.
Huh, he hadn't thought about that. "What the fuck do you want, Roy?" he said with renewed confidence as he sat back in his chair.
Roy looked at him straight in the eye, studying him for a few seconds. "Are you fucking Emma?" he asked him point blank.
The crude question startled him so much he almost choked on his own saliva. "What? Are you fucking crazy?" Max answered.
"Answer the question," Roy said calmly.
"No, I'm not sleeping with her, alright? Jesus Christ." Max had never been more thankful for not taking it further with her that night, but he still wished that sentence was a lie instead of the truth. He also refused to use the word 'fucking' because it would never just be that with her.
Roy studied him for a few more seconds and then relaxed. "Good. I didn't think she would stoop to your level, but you can never rule anything out."
"Are we done here?" Max asked, standing to leave. He certainly didn't want to submit to any further interrogation. He didn't think he would be able to lie about kissing her.
"Sit down, Max," Roy ordered.
"Look, I don't know what's going on between you two and I really don't give a fuck either, so I don't see how there's anything else to talk about."
Roy simply flexed out his muscles and made a show of displaying his thick arms on the table in front of him.
Max took an inward gulp and sat back down again.
"I was hoping you could talk to her...for me," Roy said.
"Are you kidding me? No fucking way."
"Just hear me out. I know you're like her only friend here, and she's been acting really...distant lately. So I thought you could just talk to her and find out what's going on."
"Look, man. I don't know what you think is going on, but I sure as hell am not involved. We're not in the same group anymore so there's no reason for us to even talk... and frankly I could care less right now. So go find yourself another fucking mule and stay the fuck away from me."
"Have you completely forgotten the conversation we had last year?"
"If by conversation you mean you kicking my ass for absolutely no reason, then yes, I clearly remember it. I didn't think you were sober enough to recall any of it."
"So you're telling me you really don't care if she gets sent back to L.A.?" Roy asked incredulously.
"Do whatever the hell you want, dickhead. I'm over your stupid threats. Your little girlfriend is not worth it. There's plenty of tail I can chase around here that is far more enticing than Emma."
Max spot a girl from class passing by and used that as his exit strategy. "Speaking of which, I gotta go secure this little honey for later tonight," he said standing up and gathering his things. "I suggest you don't waste my time again with your nonsense or we're gonna have a problem."
He went after the girl from class, desperately trying to remember her name. "Hey, sweetheart, wait up," he called after her loud enough for Roy to hear, internally cringing at the term he reserved only for Emma.
The girl looked at him surprised, and he immediately wrapped his arm around her neck leading her away from Roy's direction. She was certainly cute, but unfortunately felt nothing when he touched her. Only Emma affected him like that. "Was wondering if you could lend me your notes from class today? I'm such an idiot, I misplaced mine somewhere," he said in a low voice.
"Um, sure," she replied nervously and smiled up at him.
He was going straight to hell over this.