Isabel was strapped down to the table, unable to move even her head. She knew her partner was near, but at this moment, she didn't know exactly where. She continued to look up, not wanting to close her eyes out of fear that something would happen if she did. Suddenly, the table began to move forward, but Isabel couldn't make out who, or what, was moving it. Her friend was warning her that she was not going to a good place and that she needed to escape, but Isabel was already strapped in, without a way to escape. She simply kept her eyes open so that she could know what was coming before it came. She was placed in a metal tube of some sort, and then suddenly, everything went completely dark. As she waiting in suspense for something to happen, she could only say one thing.
"Hello, darkness, my old friend."
************************
Reid sat in his hotel room, looking out the window. The details of the case were spread out before him, and he was trying his best to put together the missing puzzle pieces of the case. They were in Columbus, Ohio, dealing with a strangler that liked his redheads. As soon as that detail was learned, everyone had looked over at Akilah, who had just shrugged it off with some sassy remark. She was always being sassy, even when the situation didn't exactly call for it. Reid sighed and glanced back down at the pictures and reports before him, wondering if even Ciara could figure out this puzzle. He thought a little bit more about the brunette, a small smile crossing his lips. They had continued their Saturday meetings after they had been abducted by Lucas McCoy, and throughout the months that they had done them, Reid had seen the changes in Ciara. She had come out of her shell. She wasn't the scared little human she used to be.
Well, that's not exactly true, is it? A voice inside Reid's head reminded him, and Reid sighed at the thought. Before the abduction, the difference in Ciara had been undeniable. She wasn't as afraid to speak her mind, and she didn't jump at every little thing, and she didn't doubt herself quite as often anymore. She still didn't allow eye or human contact, but Reid could tell they were getting there. Until they were abducted. The abduction had obliterated all progress they had made, and they were back to square one with Ciara. Reid put away the details of the case, knowing that once he let his mind drift to Ciara, he wasn't getting it back on the case. He couldn't explain it, but Ciara... well, even he didn't understand what she did to him. He found himself thinking about her more frequently, and he was constantly searching for ways to make her smile and laugh. He had heard her laugh once. He knew he could get her to do it again.
As he continued to think, he realized with a start that there was to be a Christmas celebration that weekend, even though it was the middle of January, and he had absolutely nothing to give her as a gift. Of course, the BAU had meant to get together to celebrate Christmas when it was the actual day, but then life got in the way. They had been called to case after case pretty much back to back, and the one day they got for Christmas that year, they had decided to spend it with their families. They had planned to do it around New Year's, but then Ciara had to go to the doctor. They had done test after test on her to make sure that her seizure wasn't going to have any long-term effects, and finally, they had decided she was okay. And now, finally, the BAU was having a Christmas celebration. Well, better late than never. However, Reid still didn't have a present for Ciara. He had one for everyone else, but he was at a loss of what to get for Ciara.
He remembered that on the plane after the Los Angeles case she had mentioned that CDs or vinyls were a good go-to for her. The only problem was, he had somehow forgotten the list of bands that she liked except for a few, and he didn't know which CDs and vinyls she already had. He didn't want to get her a copy of something she already owned. He grabbed a notepad and wrote down everything he could remember, which was only one band and absolutely none of the CDs. He remembered Panic! At The Disco because of her earbuds. He couldn't remember anything else. The one time his eidetic memory had failed. Finally, he realized that Akilah would probably know all of this. He took his notepad with him so that he could write whatever she had to say down, and went over to Akilah's room, knocking hesitantly. She was at the door instantly.
"Oh, hey Reid! What brings you by? Come on in," Akilah invited him in, and he followed her, notepad in hand.
"Um, I wanted to talk about Ciara," he answered, and her attitude changed. Sighing, she sat down on her bed. She had noticed that Ciara had lost all her progress, and Reid knew that she still felt it was her fault for not having been there for Ciara. Reid knew that she felt that if she had been taken with them, she could have protected Ciara and saved her slowly healing psyche from shattering again. If anything, Ciara was probably worse, as she had quit talking altogether unless it was absolutely imperative. They had performed a psych evaluation on all of the agents taken, and somehow, Ciara had been cleared. They still couldn't quite get her to talk yet, and she blanked out much more often than before, and Reid still wondered if she was fighting to keep herself in reality during those moments.
"Yeah, what about her? I don't know how to get her to talk again, Reid. I don't even really know what my bastard brother did to her during the time he had you guys that set her off so much, but whatever it was... well, one, she's not gonna tell us why it's affecting her so much, and two, whatever it was destroyed whatever progress we made. It hurt her deeply, Reid," Akilah said.
"Okay, thanks for clearing that up, but that's not what I came here for," Reid told her, and Akilah raised an eyebrow.
"Then what are you... you don't have a present yet for her, do you? And so you came to me because you thought I'd know her well enough that I could tell you her likes and dislikes and what she already has and what she needs?" Akilah asked.
"Um, well, yeah. That's exactly it. But I remember that she said CD and vinyls are a good idea for her, and I thought you could help me figure out which CDs she doesn't have. That, and somehow I can only remember one of the bands she likes," he revealed, holding out the notepad. Akilah looked at it and snorted.
"How could you not remember Fall Out Boy? Remember when she came in crying that one day?" Akilah asked, and as Reid thought, he remembered the day she was talking about.
"Woah, Chestnut, what's wrong?" Garcia asked Ciara, who had come in that morning in tears, with tear streaks from the night before still obvious on her face. Her eyes were red and swollen, telling everyone that she had been crying for a long time. Everyone except for Akilah had gathered around her, worried about their teammate. Akilah just sighed and sat down at her desk, already knowing why Ciara was crying, but not really understanding why it was affecting her that much.
"Don't ask. Seriously, don't ask." Akilah said with an eye roll, and under her breath, Reid could have sworn Ciara said "bite me". However, despite Akilah's warning, they kept asking Ciara why she was crying until she finally burst with a new set of tears.
"Fall Out Boy went on an indefinite hiatus!" she cried, and everyone except for Garcia stopped in their tracks.
"They did WHAT?" Garcia exclaimed, and Ciara had gone on to explain that the night before they had posted on their social media that they were taking a break, and they didn't know when, or if, they would ever get back together, leading most to think that this hiatus was going to end in them completely breaking up. Garcia, ever the emotional one, began to tear up at the thought, but Ciara completely started to cry again, explaining when asked that these people had helped her through some tough times, but that she didn't expect the others to understand.
"Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. You know, after that, I did some research on why fans feel such a deep connection with a band or singer sometimes, and I found some interesting things-"
"Reid, I don't care. Besides Fall Out Boy, you also missed My Chemical Romance, and... wait, why don't you just go ask her about it?" Akilah wondered, and after Reid had scribbled down the two names, he answered.
"One, she isn't talking to any of us, and two, won't that give away that I don't have a present for her yet?" Reid wondered, and Akilah shook her head.
"Ciara would never pick up on something like that. Besides, that might be the thing that gets her talking again. Please, just do it," Akilah requested, and Reid thought for a moment, before realizing that she was right. Music always seemed to get Ciara talking. Maybe that would be the start of a sort of glue that could start healing her psyche again. He grabbed his notepad and went over to Ciara's room, and knocked on the door. When she opened the door, he began to notice truly how she was holding up, and the answer was terribly. There were dark marks under her eyes, and when she moved, it was lethargically. She wasn't getting any sleep. But he had a mission.
"Hey, I was just thinking, and I realized that I had forgotten, somehow, most of the bands that we talked about on the plane after Los Angeles. Do you think you could remind me? And maybe we could talk about their CDs?" Reid asked, hoping that she would actually answer. What if she still wouldn't talk? What if...
"Sure. I'd like that," she answered softly, and motioned for him to come inside. He had to take a moment to realize that she had actually talked to him. It was awfully quiet, but she had still talked to him, more than was imperative. She only had to say "sure", but instead she had added "I'd like that". He gripped his notepad and walked into her room. "What's the notepad for?"
"I don't want to forget again," Reid answered, happy that she was talking again. She pulled out her mp3 player, twirling it around in her fingers, keeping her gaze on it, never looking anywhere else.
"Ye know, I love my mp3, but there's something about CDs and vinyls that I love. Maybe because then I can play them in my room because I have a CD player, but I don't have an aux cord," Ciara said, and Reid nodded. He didn't understand much about that kind of music, but anyone could see how much it meant to Ciara. He liked to listen to Mozart and Beethoven, but even then, he wondered if he could ever get into the type of music Ciara liked for her sake. He had a feeling that Ciara was only into her type of music because of what she had gone through, but he didn't want to make vocal assumptions without definite proof.
"So I remembered three bands, but none of the CDs," Reid told her, holding out the notepad, and she glanced over it, before shaking her head.
"Ye're gonna learn today, Reid. Okay, so ye have Panic!, Fall Out Boy, and My Chemical Romance. Not a bad start. What ye don't have for bands is Breaking Benjamin, Eminem, Green Day, Three Days Grace, Linkin Park, and Nickelback," she answered slowly so that Reid could write down the names that she was throwing out there. He had probably spelled some of them wrong, but he could look them up later to get the spelling right.
"So, um, is there any CD that you've been wanting for a long time now? Or..."
"Not from any of these bands. I've somehow managed to get all that I can of these guys. I even have a fan-made copy of Fall Out Boy's Evening Out With Your Girlfriend, even though I think most people forget that exists. I haven't listened to it more than once, though. It took a lot of willpower to even open it that first time," Ciara answered, and Reid inwardly groaned. Basically, he'd have to find a new band for her, and he didn't know anything about any other genre of music but classical. He could never figure out who she might like and who she wouldn't. He was straight out of ideas when she sent another bombshell his way. "That, and when I get into a new band, I like to start with their debut album. Didn't really work for Fall Out Boy, since I learned about From Under The Cork Tree first, which is their second real album, but then I learned about the first one, and then I felt really bad. That's why I go with the debut album now."
"So, really, when it comes to music, you aren't looking for anything else?"
"Oh, not necessarily. I'm always game for trying a new band if someone was to get me a new CD or a vinyl. I have all the vinyls, too. Being a bestselling author does have its perks sometimes, ye know. Now, if only I could find a way to gear some of that towards concert tickets. I don't have enough time for concerts, though, unfortunately. I've never seen any of the bands on that list live," Ciara admitted, but Reid knew that concert tickets were out of the question. He couldn't get them in time, and she was right. They really didn't have time for any of that. He had convinced himself to go to a football game that one time, but he had been really tired the next day, and it didn't really work well.
"Ciara, can I ask you something? You don't have to answer if you don't want to," Reid wondered, and Ciara stopped messing with the mp3 but told him to go ahead. "Why do you like your music? You've said before that not very many people do. What got you into it?"
"I actually have an answer for that. Close yer eyes," Ciara instructed.
"Why-"
"Just do it, please?" she asked, and he closed his eyes. He heard her moving to him, and he felt her put something in his ear. An earbud. "This song is by Fall Out Boy. It's called 'Sophomore Slump Or Comeback Of The Year'. Just listen, and ye'll have yer answer." She put the other earbud in his ear, before turning the music on. It wasn't very long before he heard what he was pretty sure she wanted him to hear.
We're the therapists pumping through your speakers, delivering just what you need.
"That's why?" he asked, opening his eyes. She looked down and took the earbuds out of his ears, wiping them on her shirt and nodding.
"Yeah. They just...they get it. They understand better than any therapist ever will. They...they give me hope that if they can feel these things and get through it, then I can, too. And they don't sugarcoat it. They tell us that yeah, life can suck, but it's okay. They explain what I can't, and they make me feel as if I'm not alone. They were there when no one else was. When I was alone, they were there, telling me I wasn't," Ciara explained, and Reid nodded. He understood. He also understood that if he could understand the music she liked...well, at this point, he was starting to understanding that she didn't just like it. He was understanding that she needed it. He knew if he could just pay attention to that music, he would learn a little more about her. He also started to realize that music was the only certain way to get through to her whenever she tried to block them out. He thanked her for the talk and for talking to him about music and went back to his room, a new plan forming. He just needed to go to a record store, and have them help him find something for Ciara. If he could help her by getting her more music, then that's what he was going to do.
After all, she deserved something that would never fail to help her.
Okay, I'm gonna be honest, I meant for this chapter to be shorter so I could fit part of the next chapter into this chapter, but I guess that didn't happen, but I still really like the way this chapter turned out. So, I looked today, I found that Psychosis has 4.5K reads! Like, how the hell? That's so amazing, you guys are so amazing! *hands out virtual hugs* I also looked and saw that this story has been in 17 different countries at least once, and that just amazes me. Like really. You guys are awesome, keep up the amazing work! Okay, I really don't have anything else I want to say, so...BYE!
"Tonight, the headphones will deliver you the words that I can't say." -Fall Out Boy, "Homesick At Space Camp"