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Kimmy (AKA DarthKemberli)
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CHAPTER 4: ENTHUSIASTIC HATRED
"[Lord Kemberli] is frightening. When I look at her, I feel like I can see the hatred that's consuming her."
- Tamia Gundree, commander of the Executor's 4th Squadron
I was hungry but I didn't want to eat.
I sat alone in the farthest corner of Mess Hall S5 - E, my legs pulled up on the bench and crossed beneath me. Though I had bonded with the dark side and pledged myself to Vader irrevocably, it would take me a while to accustom myself to seeing copies - clones - of the same person walking around with themselves. There were, of course, many normal people - usually higher-ranking officials - but the vast majority of Vader's soldiers were clones. Enough originals had been cloned to create some variety, but I still saw identical men and women together in the same room. It unsettled me, and I wondered how they coped living like that, knowing that they were the outcomes of technology, produced solely for the purpose of war.
Maybe they viewed it the way I did now: a necessity, even a desire, not something to be repulsed by. Though they were all programmed to be much the same, I knew that each one of them had an individual, unqiue soul. I felt their souls, warm presences brushing by my consciousness, none ever quite like another. Some were colder, some were warmer... Vader's presence was the coldest I had ever felt. But then again, I hadn't met very many other Sith.
Just the thought of Vader and his cold, cold soul roused my admiration. He was perfect, invincible, powerful. And truly and completely frightening. In his presence, I trembled no matter how hard I tried not to. His presence was too overpowering not to shiver. I could feel his Force power. It was cold, it was all-encompassing, and it was dark. So dark. Exactly like a black hole. I shuddered, remembering the way I was always drawn to stare at his face, though it could hardly be called a face. I was afraid of Vader, yet I craved the fear that consumed me when I was with him. It paralyzed my mind, yet it powered my limbs and my soul. I was so powerful now that I had joined the dark side. Strange to think that just two weeks ago, I had been so devastated to learn of my origins and my true purpose in life.
Abruptly I stood. Thinking this way was dangerous. I could easily slip and allow my deepest buried thoughts to force their way up to the surface of my mind. Distracting myself, I walked down between the benches, keeping my eyes in front to avoid the stares of the soldiers around me. They were all curious about me, but far too afraid to approach me, except when on errands. I preferred it that way: becoming too attached to individual persons could not have a positive effect on my progress in training.
The higher-uppers in my block, however, were less shy, especially the men. It irked me, but I refrained from being too rude with them. Impatience would be disgraceful for a Sith lord, so I remained calm, knowing that as time passed, they would lose interest. Hopefully my nearness to Vader would discourage them.
I took a tray - white, unsurprisingly - and joined the line. The woman in front of me was none other than Commander Gundree. I said nothing, indifferent as to whether or not she noticed me. After our first meeting in the halls, when I had broken into the Executor, we had met on several occasions, always in the company of Vader. She was one of Vader's most trusted lackeys, having served under him for several years now and having completed many dangerous combat missions. The Executor's Squadron Four was under her command. She was also an excellent pilot. I now recognized her by her light brown hair, loose and hanging down to her shoulders. She wore a tight nut-brown suit and her white trooper's boots. I had never seen her in anything else besides her trooper's suit, and I had to admit that her body was eye-catching. I didn't understand why, then, did the men bother with me when she dressed so much more appealingly.
As I mused absent-mindedly over not knowing her first name, she suddenly turned around.
"Lord Kemberli!" She raised her hand to her forehead in a smart salute. I observed her respectful yet confident expression for a moment, then nodded in acknowledgement.
"Commander Gundree," I said. She smiled cautiously, then seemed to hesitate before speaking again.
"Shall I keep you company?" Gundree ventured, stepping forward as the line advanced. Her offer caught me by surprise. I closed my eyes briefly, tasting the Force energy that she emanated. There was nothing there but honest civility. I thought that she was pushing her luck fairly far, asking a Sith if she could eat with her, but I decided there was no harm in accepting.
"Sure," I said, flashing her a smile of my own. At least my eyes didn't glow when I wasn't fighting or angry.
Once we had filled our trays with rations, I let Gundree find an empty table by the wall. We were silent for a few moments, tense and occupied with our first few bites. I had chosen biscuits, milk, and spiced beef stew. Nostalgic. Very. A forbidden train of thought started up in my mind, and I quickly halted it by looking up at Gundree.
"I don't think I've learned your first name yet, Commander," I said. I kept my tone carefully polite, although Vader had made it clear that I was superior to everyone else except him. I didn't want to antagonize Gundree, though her face told me my worry was probably useless. She seemed rather anxious. Who could blame her? I frightened myself too.
"It's Tamia, my lord," Gundree said.
Her tone of voice was relaxed under the clipped courtesy. Though it was strange, I somehow felt that we could simply talk as two peers, rather as subordinate and superior.
"Drop the title, please, we're just eating," I said, grinning at her. My light tone must have broken the ice, because her shoulders relaxed and she grinned back.
"Sure, if you'll just call me Tamia," she replied, still grinning. Her smile met her eyes, where it crinkled the edges just a tiny bit. She was older than me, definitely, but not too much older. Perhaps only three or four years. Her eyes were brown, darker than her hair, and her skin was tanner than mine. She was probably born that way, which likely meant that she was born on a planet. If she was born on a planet, then she was not a clone and was chosen specifically by Vader from an Imperial Academy school.
"What planet are you from, Tamia?" I asked, breaking a piece of biscuit and placing it in my mouth. I supposed I could afford being human: Vader probably had nothing against it.
"Ah, I'm from Alderaan."
"I've never been there... It sounds nice, though. Very sunny?" I said, motioning to her dark skin. She nodded.
"Yeah, it's warm. Growing up there was great," said Tamia, her eyes bright at the memory. I didn't let it trigger my own memories. "But training at the Imperial Academy on Coruscant was even better."
"You must have been dedicated... Look at you now."
"Yeah, well..." Tamia seemed embarrassed, as if she didn't know how to deal with a compliment from a Sith lord younger than herself. "It was mostly hard work. And motivation... I really wanted to work for Lord Vader."
This perked my interest.
"Oh? Why?" I was genuinely curious now.
"I admire him," she said. "He's a great man and a great leader. He may be stern, but that's the way we all have to be to keep peace in the Empire."
I nodded.
"What about the Emperor?"
"Oh, the Emperor..." The look on Tamia's face was one of pure devotion. Vader wasn't mistaken when he said that she was loyal to the Emperor. "He just... blows me away, really. He's brought a great peace to the galaxy... What could be better than working beneath him? Emperor Palpatine and Lord Vader, they're the reasons that I fight so hard."
I was silent for a moment.
"So... You're not doing this for yourself, then?"
"No, not in the literal sense... But I'm happy doing what I do, so it's fine. This is what I really want to do with myself."
I nodded.
"What about you?" Tamia took a sip of whatever foul-smelling beverage she had ordered. "Where are you from?"
Aetheria was on the tip of my tongue, but I quickly bit it back. She knew about the Jedi there... I didn't want her to jump to any strange conclusions.
"I'm not sure..." I said instead, truthfully. "I don't remember my parents. My... uncle brought me up. We spent some time on Kashyyyk."
"The oceans are nice there," Tamia commented with a sympathetic smile. I ignored the sympathy.
"Yes, they were," I agreed. I had been there once with Yu- my former master, on a mission with the Wookies. I guessed we had been betrayed by them. Not intentionally - the Wookies were too loyal and kind-hearted for that - but the Empire was good at finding hidden information. I shook the thoughts away.
"So you're training here, huh?" Tamia said suddenly, staring at me pointedly. I didn't react to the scrutiny in her eyes, but it immediately put me on alert.
"Yes, I am," I said carefully.
"Ah..." She watched me critically for a moment. "Are you his apprentice?"
I was grateful that she kept her voice low. Keeping calm, I shook my head.
"No. I'm simply using the facilities here. In return for quarters, I'll be doing missions for Lord Vader."
"Ah."
The suspiscious look didn't quite leave her eyes. Probably because every time she had seen me, I had been with Vader. Irritation welled up in me. I considered influencing her mind, but I sensed that she was strong in the Force, so I didn't bother.
"You do realize," I said casually, finishing off my bowl of stew, "betraying Vader in any way will result in your death, probably at my hands?"
Tamia's facial expression didn't change, but a fluctuation in the energy coming off of her told me that she was suddenly nervous.
"Yes, I do realize that, my lord," she said a little too quickly, slipping into military courtesy. I felt some satisfaction at her nervous reaction, and then felt even more satisfaction when I sensed that she definitely would not mention my existence to the Emperor.
"I'm glad, Commander." I watched her with near-smoldering eyes until she cringed very slightly. Her face coloured a shade as she was suddenly occupied with her tray. I didn't regret ruining the friendly mood of our conversation: Commander Tamia Gundree needed to remember her place and mine. For but a second, something like pride flowed through me at being able to create such respectful fear in such an important officer in Vader's army, but quickly, easily, I got rid of it. Pride was not fitting for an apprentice of the most perfect dark lord in the galaxy.
A motion caught my eye. I looked up to see a tall trooper standing by our table. With a salute, he broke the thick silence between me and Gundree.
"Lord Kemberli," he greeted, pulling off his helmet to reveal his young, scarred face. His eyes were blue, and his hair was blonde and cropped very short. Patar Caryoliss, commander of Squadron Five. Many of Vader's high-ranking officials were young. Likely because most officers didn't survive more than a few years. I stood up.
"Yes, Commander Caryoliss?" I asked, though I was fairly sure of the reason he was here.
"Lord Vader commands your presence," he answered. "He is waiting in room D-13 in sector 10."
"I see," I said. I looked at Gundree and gave her a small nod. "It was a pleasure to eat with you, Commander Gundree."
"Y- you're welcome!" Gundree stammered, obviously still shaken. Caryoliss shot her the shortest of glances, an amused expression on his face.
"Thank you, Commander," I addressed Caryoliss. He nodded seriously, but as I stepped past him I saw his eyes fix on my face appreciatively. Giving an inaudible sigh, I cleared my throat in warning. It was enough to make him drop his eyes. As I walked away, though, I felt his eyes return to my head, the only part of my body uncovered by my cloak. Deliberately I lifted my hood to cover my hair. I was not interested in the attention of men.
Lord Vader was waiting in the center of the room. I composed myself as I crossed the floor and kneeled before him.
"Master." I bowed my head.
"Rise," said Vader. I promptly stood and removed my hood, watching my master as he turned and strode across the room. With his hands clasped behind his back, he seemed almost pensive, but I didn't relax. I knew all too well to always expect the unexpected, especially with Vader. Twice already, he had surprised me during commutes through the Executor with sudden lightsaber assaults, and I had barely warded them off without injury. I knew better now.
Making use of the silence, I quickly scanned the room. I hadn't been here before. It seemed to be some sort of storage facility, roughly a hundred by five hundred square feet. The walls were a bland grey, and the ceiling was unfinished. Large transparisteel tankers, labelled "Danger: Highly Toxic", were neatly stacked in steel crates. I approached one carefully and took a tentative sniff. I wrinkled my nose. The clear liquid contained in the tanks smelled much like ammonia, yet it was slightly sweet at the same time.
"Proctite fuel," I said aloud.
"That is correct, Kemberli," said Vader from across the room. "Do you know what happens when it makes contact with human skin?"
"Yes, Master," I replied, supressing a shudder. On that same visit to Kashyyyk that I had mentioned to Commander Gundree, I had seen a young, inexperienced human trying to refuel his speederbike with proctite. He had absent-mindedly placed the open container on the vehicle as he opened the fuel hatch. As fate would have it, the bottle spilled over him. I remembered clearly the way he had screamed, and how quickly his flesh had disintegrated until his bones were visible. He hadn't survived. "It disintegrates human flesh."
"Precisely."
A movement behind me made me whip around. An uncrated tanker of proctite fuel across the room floated up into the air and hung there. I looked at Vader, and I understood what he was doing. I ignored any fear and focused on the tanker. Vader would not want to lose me, which meant he had the utmost confidence in my abilities to pass this test. I felt warm with pride.
"If your concentration so much as wavers," warned Vader, "you will die."
"Yes, Master!" I smiled.
In the next instant the tanker was hurtling towards me. I threw my hands up and closed my eyes, abandoning myself to the pulls of the Force. I felt the tanker with my mind and responded to it, feeling its solidity against my hands even though I knew it was floating in the air just a metre away from my body. Concentrating, breathing, I gently lowered the tanker until I knew it rested on the ground. I opened my eyes to see the tanker safely on the ground.
"Excellent," said Vader. He lifted another tanker and hurled it towards me, faster than the one before. I kept my eyes open this time, which was more difficult as I had to work extra hard to feel the Force with the distractions of sight, but I managed it as easily as I had with the first tanker. The tankers were heavy, but lifting them was nothing compared to stretching a Force shield over more than fifty feet to protect my old mentor from Vader's attacks. I blocked the thoughts out before they could disrupt my focus. It was well that I did so, because in the next moment Vader sent not only one but two tankers flying towards me. I spent a good portion of the day training in this manner. Vader raised the number of tankers to four at a time, but no more than that since I had trouble holding them steady in the air. This proved just how much he loathed the thought of losing me, despite his apparent indifference.
We finished training sometime around 1700. I trailed after Vader through the endless corridors up to the observation deck. It was still unfinished, in the process of construction by at least a dozen droids. The room was gigantic, and instead of walls, huge transparisteel windows shielded the deck from the vacuum of space. Beneath us, visible through the grating floor, was head command, also still under construction. Clearly this entire chamber was not only a control room, but the main observation dome as well. Standing next to the foremost window, I could see the vast hulk of the Executor stretching off into space. I was staggered once again by its enormity. The Empire was invincible, of that I was sure.
"Kemberli, recite the Sith Code," said Vader suddenly, and I turned to see him beside me. I nodded, folding my hands and lowering my head reverently as I let the ancient teachings roll off my tongue.
"'Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion I gain strength.
Through strength I gain power.
Through power I gain victory.
Through victory my chains are broken.
The Force shall free me.'"
A part of my mind recoiled from the words, repulsed by what it believed to be grossly false. It took all I had to keep my voice strong and my face indifferent. It helped to focus on my own passion - hatred - which, according to the Sith Code, would strengthen me. And so far it had worked. So there was absolutely no reason for me to have even a hint of disgust for the Sith Code. It was far more satisfying than the Jedi Code, and far more fulfilling.
"Excellent," said Vader. If he had sensed my conflict, he didn't mention it. I held back a sigh of relief. "Now. You have advanced in your training quite remarkably. Your lightsaber skills, as well as your mastery of the Force, have greatly improved in the short time you have been here. It is time to bring your training to the next level."
I listened attentively.
"My spies have located a Jedi Master and his Padawan hiding on the planet Mustafar. The Jedi's name is Brak Li, and the Padawan is Teah Rubees. I want you to find and kill them."
My level of excitement immediately leaped a notch. I struggled against grinning.
"Yes, Master," I said, controlling my excitement.
"You may take your ship, the Star Princess. You have a week to complete this mission. Now go, and may the Force be with you, my apprentice."
"And with you, Master." I bowed low before hurrying away. My heart pounded with excitement, blotting out any traces of remorse that I may have felt at hunting down Jedi. My first mission for Vader! And an opportunity to put my newfound Sith abilities to the utmost test. For what could be more thrilling than to fight a Jedi Master? I knew how very skilled they could be, but I felt sure my new abilities would be enough to overpower them. And two at a time! A smile stretched across my face, and I felt my eyes burn in anticipation.