Jungkook's P.O.V
I woke up to a grumbling stomach, I smelled food; dinner. The pain had mostly faded away, now replaced by hunger, but the headache still remained as it was. Adjusting my eyes to my phone, I unlocked it. It was 5:30PM and I was so hungry.
I opened up my food diary and sadly wrote down my breakfast, aka the banana. I looked at the day before and it was totally empty except for the water.
I ignored the hunger as I felt the guilt of eating, I had felt so good not eating at all. I'm sure the dizziness will not happen again, especially the fainting.
All I need is to just lose weight.
Suddenly my door opened and I immediately locked my phone, it was Hoseok.
"Oh, you are already awake. Dinner is ready!" He smiled.
I wasn't looking forward to it at all, still I slightly smiled back and said: "Nice, I'm hungry!"
"Good to hear!" Hoseok smiled more and signaled me to come and then he left.
My smiled disappeared from my face just a mere second later.
Just don't let it in your stomach too long.
I could hear the voice in my head and it was giving me ideas, ideas I would most likely keep me to.
I climbed out of my bed. I was wearing some sweatpants and a t-shirt, the same ones I wore from the hospital to our dorm drive.
After I made my way downstairs, I sat down at the table. Everyone looked at me which made me kind of uncomfortable, but when I smiled a bit, everyone started to talk.
I didn't really participate in the conversations and played with my food, just nodding once in a while. I really didn't want to eat, but Yoongi's eyes on me made me take a bite. It felt good and horrible at the same time, finally filling my stomach which only had a banana today.
I took another bite, I felt like I had lost control as I took another one and another one after that.
Not long after I had finished my entire meal.
I felt extremely full and fat.
Just don't let it in your stomach too long.
The idea popped up in my head again and I thought about how long it takes until it won't work anymore. I wanted to act quick, but everyone was still enjoying their meal.
I had to think of an excuse.
The only excuse I could find was that I needed to use the bathroom.
I was already making my way to the bathroom, dread filling me; The first time was so hard, and it was only the second time I wanted to do it.
(Trigger warning)
Opening up the door and locking it, I put on the faucet right away. I kneeled before the toilet and looked at my reflection in the water. I looked at my hand, it was shaking. It almost felt like it was harder now than it was the first time.
You can do it!
With a sudden wave of confidence, I put that hand inside of my mouth really fast which made me choke. It wasn't long until the food I literally just ate came up.
It was painful.
It tasted gross.
I felt gross.
No, I felt good.
I looked at the noodles mixed with vegetables in the toilet bowl. Shivering, I flushed the toilet. Quickly washing my mouth before turning off the faucet. I really wanted some chewing gum now.
Even more dread filled me, I needed to get back to the table. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door slowly. As I did, I almost jumped in fear, Yoongi hyung stood right behind the door. His face was a mix of concern and angriness. I shivered.
"D-did you just make yourself sick?"
I gasped slightly, I didn't know what to do. "I-I..." I tried saying something but I couldn't. Instead, as cowardly as it was, I made a run for it. Not thinking, I made my way past Yoongi quickly and headed for the front door, not even putting my shoes on I made my way outside.
Running as if it was for my life.