Amé,
Here is the first letter of a long serie.
Because if you have this one in your hands,it's that my plan worked. I am sorry, I really wanted it to be different believe me. But what is done is not to do so read me with attention.
When you will feel ready you will find a box full of envelopes in my things.They will have each a description about the meaning of what they contain.Open only the one which is the closest to your feelings.I will not be here to stop you from opening them all at the same time but I really want you to play the game.I know it's a lot to ask after everything I did to you.I hope that one day you will understand my choice, mon ange.
That's why I give this letter to a trustworthy person,I made Ben promise me to give it to you at the moment he would judge good if anything happened to me.Because yes i will not hide that, I have been planning it for a long time Amé.But this time, I will not apologize.THat was necessary whatever you could think about it.
I - had - to - do - it.
Do you believe me now?Sorry it was childish and a totally useless reflection.
More and more I see me looking at you during your training and your way to react had changed.The kid that I have known resurfaced slowly.My feelings are split in two because of this; my desire to be with you and the one to know you safe and sound.I don't have the right to make you suffer again Amédéo.I know it but there is not another way.I am the problem and I will remain one whatever I do.
You will have to endure a lot of things alone, then I wanted to give you a last gift.The future is straight in front of you mon ange.Do you want me to go hand in hand with you?
I would understand whatever your choice is.If you decide to move on whithout me then Benedict will burn all the other letters and you will never heard about me again.If you hesitate, you will understand a part of my choice by going to talk to Argos.Your uncle has always been good advice.He will help you to take a decision if you need it.
Meanwhile take care of yourself,it's the most important.
Maybe see you soon!
No, I don't want to leave it there!You have to understand completely what is going on.I am terrified at the idea of loosing you and even imagine a future without you.But I had to do it.I imagine you reading this letter and curse me.I would like so much to erase all that and reset!But I have already apologize too many times.This words end to lose their meaning,don't you think?
I never wanted you to suffer,it was never my intention.Everything went too fast from the beginning.Our story had always been out of control.I am a mountain of thorns who attack whom has the misfortune to get closer to me.You, you are the rose Amé.The majority of your problems always had a connection with me.With us.It was the time for me to solve it once and for all.
You deserve to know a radiant future.Tomorrow is nearby,what do you want to do?Are you going to set off towards it?