INSULTING SPANDAM - One Piece...

By HalfBloodJoker

710 24 12

Spandam, the chief of Ennies Lobby, faced his destruction in battle. However, a mysterious character named Gi... More

The First Insult
The Second Insult
The Third Insult
The Fourth Insult
The Sixth Insult
The Seventh Insult

The Fifth Insult

76 2 1
By HalfBloodJoker

CLING!

CLANG!

Those sounds. He must be busy throwing things again, I thought to myself. The clings and the clangs stopped abruptly when I got closer. I walked around the corner and faced his cell. He stood close to the bars this time. He looked a little grumpy and his arms were crossed. I couldn't help but be a little intimidated by the way he looked my way. There was simply too much madness in his eyes. But of course, I couldn't let this show.

"Good morning," I said, carrying a huge bag with me. "I brought you some food."

"Huh. I didn't expect you to actually listen to me," he said in surprise. Then he frowned again. "But if you expect me to thank you, think again. I'm still going to make you suffer the most agonizing pain you have ever felt! Once I get out of here, that is."

"Yeah, yeah, threats, shmeats."

I dragged the bag to the bars, carefully keeping my distance, and shoved it towards him.

"My, such caution," he said with a disgusting smirk.

I rolled my eyes.

"Surprised?" I asked.

He chuckled. "No, not really."

He ripped open the bag qnd retrieved all of the items through the bars. I had brought him bottles of milk, apples, rice and instant coffee.

"I'm used to more variant foods," he said, displeased. "Are you sure I can survive on this alone?"

"Be grateful," I responded. "I could have given you nothing at all, you know."

He muttered something.

"I guess the reason you're used to more expensive and variant food is because you've got such a well-paid job," I said, working towards my next insult. He slowly turned his angry gaze to me, apparantly noticing it in the tone of my voice. I continued with a smile. "Which is quite strange, of course, considering how terrible you are at your work! You probably only got this job because of a family connection..."

He bared his teeth at me when my smile got bigger.

"Oh wait! You actually did get this job because of your dad! That means this is not even an insult, IT'S A TRAGIC FACT!"

He aggressively slammed his fists against the bars.

"I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU, WENCH!" he screamed. "YOU CAN'T SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT!!! AND HOW THE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MY FATHER?!?"

"I've done my research," I said. "Your father's name is Spandine. He's a coward, just like you, but at least he didn't invoke the Buster Call by accident."

"HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?!?! I COMMAND YOU TO TELL MY RIGHT NOW!!!!"

"I already told you: research. You should probably have done some of your own. You know, with Luffy being Dragon's son and all. But no, you thought you were so clever. Ha, look where it got you."

"AAAAAH! I'M GOING TO TEAR YOU LIMB FROM LIMB!!"

I was done talking. I returned to the stairs and left the dungeon once again.

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