I was physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted. But despite the exhaustion, I couldn’t seem to sleep. My body was begging me to rest but my mind is against it. The night seems so loud like there’s some kind of stereos banging loud music in my ears. I twist and turned, trying to look for the most comforting position but failed. I even tried counting sheep until I counted a thousand. That didn’t succeed because after counting a few bunches of sheep the sheep’s head suddenly grew cyan hair and turned to a Mikaze jumping on a fence.
Yeah, my mind- even though I let myself believe of the feelings they were talking about, was still going around in circles. Doubting and believing and doubting and believing. I can’t seem to make up my mind. The good news is, I was able to put it into words and finally composed my song. I only did it for a night and totally fell asleep after. All I need to do now is to try it out and all is well. But… I won’t let you hear it until the day of my competition. I slept passed midnight- which was totally agonizing for the following day- which is, the day before Christmas.
The temperature was freezing! Good thing that it wasn’t like this yesterday or I won’t be able to act without jittering. I woke up 30 minutes late on my schedule. I wasn’t worried though. If he’ll bombard me with lessons again I’ll shove my finished song unto his face. That’s- If I have the nerve to do it.
I went out of our room and I can see how busy people are in here. They’re all running around, carrying boxes and stuffs. Some of them even wear a Santa hat like Syo and Natsuki. Everybody from Shining Entertainment’s master course is all present today. The Starish, Quartet Night, and even the newbies that I haven’t seen for a while are all here.
Today we’re preparing for Christmas Eve and an advance birthday party for Hijirikawa. We’re going to have a picnic outside and lit fireworks. I’m getting agitated.
I helped Shiori and Haruka prepare the venue while Starish members do all the cooking, Quartet Night for the entertainments and the other three newbies for the fireworks. All went well until…
-_- Blizzards came to us like a herd of wild bulls seeing red.
“Eh… and I wanted to watch fireworks.” Reiji whined like a kid while pouting. Akahiro- the red-headed newbie clicked his tongue in Reiji’s childishness, “Then let’s lit the fireworks inside.” He uttered with a tone of sarcasm. Ranmaru tightly grasped the boy’s head, “That’s not how I teach you boy!” He growled. “Now now Ran-Ran, stop blaming the kid. He clearly reminds me of you.” Reiji said cheerfully then laughed. Ranmaru clicked his tongue in defeat. “See? You also inherited his habit.” Reiji pointed out and laughed again. “No good Ran-Ran the second, you do realize that lighting up fireworks inside is the second forbidden thing inside Shining’s book of law.” Reiji chuckled. Ranmaru and Akahiro looked at each other with their eyebrows knitted. The others who get the joke laughed. “Of course it was a joke.” Reiji uttered in between laughs.
“What do we do now?” Haruka turned to the huge glass window while looking at the strong snow storm outside. They all quieted down and looked at each other. I twirled my reddish-brown hair using my index finger while quietly watching the dullness of the atmosphere. The place was decorated by glimmering lights and colorful accessories but the idols’ depression beat the happiness out of it.
“What? We could all celebrate it inside right? As long as we’re together everything’s going to be fun.” I uttered. They all looked at me- a bit surprised on my uncharacteristic statement. They looked at each other and the eeriness of the surroundings changed into a burst of laughter. Syo put an arm around me, “That was funny, especially when you say it.” He said. I wasn’t offended. A smile made its way onto my face and just joined in the fun.
We lit the chimney and planned to do the picnic inside the living room. We pushed the appliances at one side and laid a huge picnic cloth on the floor. All the prepared food was now perfectly rested on the middle and we formed a huge circle around it. Seeing this- I kind of feel the warmth of a family, celebrating Christmas Eve together. After waiting for a few minutes before midnight, we all shouted in Unison, “Merry Christmas, and Advance Happy Birthday Masato.” Hijirikawa turned red because this was kept hidden from him. Reiji opened a bottle of wine and we started eating.
---
Seems like everyone is enjoying the night. After eating Dinner we decided to stay late until we drop. Of course, with bottles of wines at hand. We sat there in a circle. Chatting and joking around until, “Let’s play a game.” Reiji blurted out. He held an empty wine bottle and rested it in the very middle of the circle. “No kill joys!” He shouted while scanning every face that scowled. “Here’s the rules, we’re going to play spin the bottle, whoever the bottle’s tip points to, he or she will choose between truth or dare. If you chose truth, you’re going to be asked a question and of course… you’re going to answer it with the truth” He let out a playful smile. “If you chose dare, then you’re going to do whatever the spinner asks you to do. You may choose if you’re going to do it or you’re going to pass and suffer a bigger consequence. Are we clear?” He asked. Everybody nodded and shouted, “Yeah” in unison. “Alrighty then, let’s start the game. Remember, this is just a game, any confessions are allowed. No kill joys and no hard feelings.” He leaned and reached for the bottle, he spins it and the tip pointed towards Jinguji. He let out a smirk and uttered, “Dare”.
Reiji looked up and think of a wonderful dare. Ranmaru leaned towards Reiji and whispered something. “Nice idea Ran-Ran.” He uttered with a playful smile on his face. “Kiss your closest male friend.” He stated. “What?! Why not friend? Why does it have to be a male?” Jinguji complained. “Because if he says ‘kiss your closest friend, you’ll probably end up kissing Nanami.” Ranmaru uttered with a smirk on his face. Jinguji narrowed his eyes on Ranmaru and turned to the guy sitting next to him. “Masato.” He whispered. Hijirikawa’s eyes widened as he tried to stay away from Jinguji. “Why is it has to be me?” He shouted while backing away. Jinguji held on to Hijirikawa’s shoulders. “Because, even if we’re rivals, we both know that you’re my closest friend.” Jinguji uttered and planted a kiss on Hijirikawa’s cheek. We all laughed at the scene. “Eh? Why on the cheeks?” Reiji complained. “You didn’t say anything about where to plant the kiss!” Jinguji countered. “Okay then, Ren spins the bottle.” Reiji shouted. Ren spins the bottle and the tip pointed towards a white headed newbie. Hideaki Oda.
“Truth.” He gleefully chirped. “What are you afraid of?” Jinguji asked. Probably doesn’t have any better questions to ask. The boy let out a sight and murmured, “Camus-san.” Ranmaru and Reiji laughed. “Looks like you tightened this poor boy’s screw way too hard Camus.” Ranmaru said between laughs. Camus didn’t let it bother him. Hideaki spins the bottle and this time its tip pointed to Ranmaru. “Dare.” He proudly growled. Reiji stood up from his seat and crawled next to Hideaki. He whispered something to him and Hideaki shyly murmured his dare, “D-do a sexy dance.” Ranmaru’s eyes shot open while Reiji and the others laughed. The entire viewers pushed him on doing it. “As if I’ll do that! Even all hell breaks loose I’m not gonna do that!” He crossed his arms against his chest. “Are you gonna pass Ran Ran? The consequence will be you serving me for a whoooole week.” Reiji chuckled. Ranmaru scowled and stood up. He started dancing while everybody laughed at the sexy but hilarious sight. Jinguji even took a video on his phone. “Black mail” he chuckled. Another bottle spin and it was now pointed towards… me, “dare”
“Now you do a sexy dance.” Ranmaru ordered with a scowl on his face. “Repetitions are not allowed Ran Ran. Besides, if Yuki do a sexy dance it’ll just probably makes all the guys here bleed.” He winked towards me. I frowned, not knowing if that’s a compliment or an insult. “Then you do the talking.” Ranmaru growled. “How about… Shout the name of the guy you love here in front of us.” He grinned. Everybody’s eyes were on me now and I can feel the embarrassment. I looked at their faces- Shiori, Jinguji and Reiji wears the same smirk on their faces. I stole a glance towards Mikaze- the happenings yesterday is making it awkward for me to even look or talk to him. He was seriously looking at me. “Pass.” I murmured as my face started to heat up. The others whined. “Let’s see… What’ll be your consequence?” Reiji looked up. “How about go to our concert on new year’s eve. Not as a VIP but an audience. That’ll be hard.” Reiji grinned. What is this guy planning? “Reiji, that’s dangerous.” Mikaze uttered. He smiled at Mikaze, “You’re too worried Ai-Ai, I just wanted her to see you sing.” He reasoned. “She’d be noticed.” Syo uttered. “Ever heard of a disguise Syo-kun?” Reiji countered jokingly. “Fine, I’d take the consequence.” I voiced out. Rather than screaming his name here. Yeah, last night when I can’t sleep. I was fighting with myself like the chibi optimistic me and the chibi pesimistic me are arguing between: I’m in love again and not. Well after I wrote my song, the chibi optimistic me triumphed. “Reiji, her competition is a week after our concert. She needs all the time she could get.” Mikaze explained in a stoic manner. “I-it’s okay Mikaze-senpai, I’ll start practicing tomorrow, b-besides I’ve done my song last night.” I explained without looking straight at him. I reached for the bottle and spins it. Akahiro- my red headed batch mate. “Truth”
“Do you hate me? And why” I seriously asked. Everybody around “oooed” in unison. His eyes were wide open upon hearing my question. He scowled and answered. “I don’t hate you. In fact… I-I admire you. I just can’t show or say it.” He murmured while looking down. Such a cute Tsundere. Everybody’s eyes were wide open, including mine. “Okay, that’s enough talk, get on with the next spin.” Mikaze coldly uttered. Shiori suddenly poked me and raised her eyebrows twice while grinning. I felt myself redden. Is Mikaze jealous? The next person is Reiji. “Dare.” Ranmaru whispered something to Akahiro. “Kiss Camus.” Akahiro lazily uttered. “Okay.” Reiji stood out of his seat. “Why involve me?! Ranmaru!” Camus shouted while pointing his stick towards his laughing friend. Reiji held his hand like he was about to hug Camus while shouting. “Chuuu~” while pouting. The others laughed at the scene. The kiss made it but it was forcedly planted on Camus cheek. Reiji spins the bottle and its tip ended pointing towards Mikaze. Reiji flashed a winsome smile. “Truth or dare?!” He asked, his eyes flaming with anticipation.
“Truth” Mikaze calmly uttered, with his arms crossed against his chest. “Are you in love? If yes, who?” I felt myself stiffened on Reiji’s question, even though the question wasn’t for me. “Yes I’ am.” Mikaze answered in monotone. The others eyes were filled with deadly curiosity. Of course, this is a first for them to here this cold, dense and strict mentor falling in love. Shiori suddenly grasped me by my shoulder and vigorously shook me- it hurts. Why do best friends always gets excited first before you in a love life. Everybody went dead silent- waiting for Mikaze’s answer. I ain’t assuming. I want to hear my name but what will happen if Mikaze says a different name. So I ain’t assuming. “Who?” Reiji asked. Mikaze looked at me first before answering.
“My stupid underling.” My heart went boom!