Entry #33: 06/02
왜 이런 일이 일어 났습니까?
Why did this happen?
I can't sleep.
Not without him here.
Byun Daekwan.
Why?
It feels like I haven't seen you for years.
I don't know where you are or how you're doing but I never stopped thinking about you.
Everywhere I go just reminds me of you.
But I know now someone else is on your mind.
Everything still seems so clear.
Every single memory spent with you still burns.
I still keep clinging to the thought of you even if I shouldn't, because it's the only thing I have left of you.
I promise you that I've tried to stop, but it's not that easy.
It has never been.
I'm convinced to constantly contemplate on your whereabouts.
I just can't give up completely on you, not just yet.
I've searched for signs of you, but you left no trace behind.
Do I really deserve this?
I loved you, I still do.
Tell me now, am I fool to still be loving a stranger?
What made you change your mind?
Was I not good enough for you?
Not only did you walk away from me,
You took my sanity with you.
I'm a mess without you.
I don't know how to cope with this anymore.
I wish I could have done something to stop you.
I wish I could go back in time just to ask why.
Is it still too much to wonder if you love me or even think about me wherever you are?
...Why do I even bother?
I lost.
I lost him.
I lost Daekwan.
I lost to another girl.
Now, I'm lost.
ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ
hi i haven't updated in a long time haaa
this is only a filler chapter to help me start on future chapters
if you managed to read all the way here, then i appreciate you so much