Noah woke up to an optimistic sight — a phone screen devoid of notifications. He bound out of bed with more energy than he had in the last six months, ashamed of himself for how quickly he seemed to find his excitement where Casimir was concerned.
The time on his phone read 10:30, leaving him with about two hours to sort himself out before he should be getting ready to leave. He surprised himself by managing to sleep in until half ten, especially considering he had fallen asleep in the early evening of yesterday.
It was very unlike himself to sleep for more than his usual eight or nine hours, but he supposed that being back in his own bed had played a part in his astounding fifteen hour slumber.
Noah felt a momentary surge of guilt as he remembered the meal he was meant to be having with his parents as a sort of welcome home thing. He scolded himself for not bothering to set an alarm. They had made his favourite, lasagne. Casimir's favourite too, one of the many things they had in common.
Almost on cue, a knock sounded at his door. Noah called out a quick 'Come in,' (his voice hoarse from his long nap), and his mother made her way into his room.
"Morning Hun, good sleep?" She asked with a smile, sitting herself down on the corner of Noah's unmade bed.
"Yeah," Noah yawned, stretching his arms up high as if to illustrate his point.
"That's good Noah, you look like you needed it."
"I did," admitted Noah. "But the dinner.. you should have woken me. I wouldn't have minded getti-" he began guiltily, but his mom cut him off before he could continue.
"Don't worry about it Noah dear, as long as you're well rested we were happy to wait. We decided to leave it until tonight, your father and I just got a take out." She reassured him, an honest smile playing on her lips.
"Okay." Noah said sceptically, still feeling a twinge of uncertainty. "If you're sure I guess."
"I am," she replied. "Besides, it's not often that Michael and I have an excuse to order in takeout, we should be thanking you." She jested, a joking grin on her face.
Noah smiled back and his mother took that as her cue to leave, closing the door softly behind her.
When she left, Noah made his way into the bathroom, grabbing a fresh towel off the rack before stepping into the shower.
He closed his eyes under the hot spray, leaning his head back and letting his thoughts roam free. Every time he thought of seeing Casimir today, a smile broke out on his face. He hated it, hated himself for having no resolve but it was like he couldn't help it. His heart wanted to see Casimir, and it seemed his heart was winning the whole heart and mind argument.
The truth was, Casimir meant so much more to Noah than a best friend. Hell, Noah often felt that Casimir meant more to Noah then Noah meant to Casimir.
He found he could live with that fact though. He had for as long as he could remember.
That's what happens when you fall in love with your best friend. Your straight best friend, at that.
The feelings were irrefutable. Noah had managed to deny himself the truth for years, but at fifteen years old he gave up, deciding to just face facts and admit to himself that he was in love with Casimir Daniels.
Since then, their friendship had been a rollercoaster of suppressed emotion and heartache. Every time Cas raved on about a new girl, Noah felt his heart break. Thankfully, Casimir's flings never developed into anything serious. Noah didn't think it possible that he would survive the heartache had Casimir ever fallen in love.
After getting ready and grabbing a bite to eat, he glanced at the clock and was surprised to see it was time for him to be going.
He grabbed his navy blue bomber jacket from the hanger in his wardrobe, throwing it over his shoulders before making his way downstairs. He paused at the front door, calling back over his shoulder that he was going to the park and that he'd be back for dinner.
Not giving his parents time to reply, he set off on a brisk walk until he reached the park. Once inside the gates, he headed over to the edge of the trees and from there into the familiar clearing. Not too far out from the park, it was the perfect spot and had become their little hideaway over the years.
It's separation from the park made it isolated enough to feel personal, but it wasn't too far out that it took long to get to.
Once there, Noah flopped himself at the base of a nearby oak tree. Suddenly finding himself nervous, Noah's mind began to entertain the thought that maybe Casimir wasn't actually coming. Maybe Noah had read too much into Casimir not replying to the message— it had been six months, perhaps Cas had forgotten that tradition.
He tried to convince himself not to worry. The time on his phone told him that Cas was only three minutes late thus far, and the boy had never been renowned for his punctuality.
But as the time went by agonizingly slowly, Noah began to accept the fact that Casimir wasn't going to show. At quarter past, Noah decided he was being ridiculous, waiting out here for Casimir when it was blatantly obvious he wasn't coming.
With a dejected sigh, Noah picked himself up from the ground and started walking away. It was only when he reached the edge of the clearing that the snap of a branch sounded behind him. He froze, not daring to turn around.
"Going so soon Noah?" A voice spoke, lighthearted and full of desperate emotion at the same time.
Noah whipped around so fast that he couldn't have been more than a blur, needing to see for himself. He didn't trust his ears in this instance.
But there he was.
Perhaps Noah was just thinking this because he was in love with him, but it was as if Casimir seemed to glow. He was a radiant sight, pure beauty.
His eyes sparkled and his usual grin was spread across his face, causing Noah's heart to skip a beat. He stood there speechless for a moment, both of them just staring at each other motionless.
It was only when Casimir opened up his arms that Noah lost all inhibitions and rushed forward into his best friends arms. They hugged tightly, Noah burying his face into the crook of Casimir's neck. He breathed in deeply, unable to comprehend that he wasn't imagining this. Casimir was here, in the flesh.
"You came." He managed to croak out, unwilling to pull himself away from Casimir.
"Obviously. What did you expect?" Casimir replied lightly, his grip on Noah tightening.
Noah was about to tell Casimir exactly what he expected after his six month absence, but Cas beat him to it.
"We need to talk. I need to set everything straight between us." Cas said softly, and Noah almost laughed at his choice of word. Straight.
Nonetheless, he pulled back from Casimir's embrace, choosing instead to hold the other boy at arms length and stare into his deep brown eyes.
Casimir hadn't changed a bit.
Noah couldn't decide whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.
His thick mop of silver blond hair, dyed because Casimir was "bored and wanted to look less 'All-American.'" His warm brown eyes, tan skin and the curve of his nose. No wonder Noah had fallen in love with him.
Casimir's most attractive feature, however, wasn't something as common as good looks. It was him as a whole, his personality.
Casimir was that guy who everyone knew, and everyone loved. His star athlete status and his incredible good looks were the only aspect of the jock stereotype he fit.
He was known for being friendly and for having a heart of gold. Casimir was the sort of person who radiated positivity, and Noah was certain that there wasn't a bad bone in his body.
"You've changed." Casimir spoke softly as he began to walk, steering Noah towards the base of the same oak tree he had sat at not half an hour ago.
"Yeah." Was all Noah murmured in agreement, sidling down to sit on the dry grass, Casimir mirroring his movements.
Casimir opened his mouth as if to continue, but Noah interjected before he could.
"You never came." He blurted out, immediately regretting his decision to speak before thinking it through.
Casimir hesitated for a moment, and Noah saw something in his eyes that told him straight away; Cas was hiding something.
What Casimir said next, however, was something Noah had not anticipated.
"What do you remember from the accident?"
Noah's head whipped up, facing Casimir so fast he was sure to be at danger of whiplash.
He knew it. Knew that Casimir not coming to see him had to have something to do with the accident. At first he felt relief; Cas hadn't just not been bothered with him.
But then a sick feeling of dread pooled in his stomach. Because no, Noah didn't remember the accident and it terrified him to think he might have done something to push Casimir away.
"Nothing really." Noah admitted with a shaky voice, turning to face Casimir with a face as white as a sheet. "Why?"
Casimir studied him for a moment, pity and conflict evident on his features. "I just.." He trailed off, and Noah gripped his arm firmly.
"Casimir. Cas. Seriously, why?" He said, his voice steely, and the dread in his stomach roaring now, leaving him with a nauseas feeling inside.
"Look Noah. A lot happened that night, but it's not my place to tell you. Just trust me on this. You need to remember on your own." He said, placing a gentle hand over Noah's free hand which lay palm down on the ground.
Noah couldn't help the feeling of fireworks that shot through him at Casimir's gentle grip.
But he shook himself out of it, trying to regain a grip on himself.
"No." He said through gritted teeth, shaking his head slowly. "No Cas. You don't get to do this. Six months I waited Cas. Six months. You can't even begin to imagine how it feels, being all alone for that long."
"I wouldn't be so sure Noah," Casimir replied softly, and Noah snapped to attention once more.
What did that mean? Had Casimir too been thrown into a hospital after the accident?
He opened his mouth to ask Casimir what he meant, his brows furrowed with confusion and curiosity. But Cas cut him off before he could ask.
"Look Noah, you know me. You know that if I could, I'd have spent every waking minute in that hospital with you. But after the accident— and please don't ask me to get into it, I just can't right now— things changed for me too."
Noah just felt his curiosity deepen, and looked up at Casimir with a desperate expression. "But..." he trailed off, leaving room for Casimir to continue, to give him some sort of explanation he could work with.
"Not now, Noah. Someday I'll be ready to talk about it. Someday, you'll be ready to hear it. But for now, can we just move past this. Go back to how things were?" Casimir said, and Noah could hear the desperate plea in his tone.
Noah didn't think it would be possible to go back to how things were completely. He wasn't the same person he was six months ago, far from it in fact.
"We can't go back. But we can go forward." Noah said, squeezing Casimir's hand with his own.
Maybe it would all be okay.