Another couple weeks went by. Alexandria was doing great. They were expanding the walls and Maggie, who announced she was pregnant, decided to start growing crops. We had to ration food but it had been worse for most of us so we didn't have a problem with it.
My foot was doing better. It was gonna take another 2 months to completely heal, but only if I was careful. I could walk without the brace but I had a little bit of a limp.
Enid, Carl, and I went outside together still. It was harder for me to get over nowadays but we still went. We hadn't had a teacher lately either so we kept to ourselves. Carl and I took care of Judith most of the time.
He still wasn't okay. He pretended like he was, especially in front of Rick and Michonne. There were times we'd be outside and he'd be zoned out sitting there.
He wasn't worried by walkers when they'd come. He just wanted to take care of them. It was like he wanted to kill all of them. I knew he could tell I knew something was up, but he wouldn't talk about it, and I wasn't going to ask. I just hoped he could get through it.
I had been rewriting my book for Rosita. She had taught me a lot about surviving and ways of attacking which I'd been adding to the book. I was almost out of room.
Carl was throwing a tennis ball against the door. I tried to tune out the noise.
"Carl." I heard from outside. It was Michonne's voice. Thank God someone called him. I was almost going crazy.
"Denise says it's PT!" He responded as he stopped for a second. I looked up to him and he turned to me. "What?" He asked angsty.
"Come out here I couldn't hear you!" Rick said as he looked at me with his eyebrow furrowed and he walked out. I looked at him and sighed lightly. It hurt that he wasn't being honest with me, but I didn't want to bother him about it. But to be honest, it was bothering me.
He came back in the room. "Ready to go?"
"Yeah." I nodded as I got to the wall and started climbing.
"Aren't we supposed to wait?" He asked.
"Just us today." I replied as I kept going. I asked Enid to stay back this time. I wanted to talk to Carl about everything and I didn't want her wrapped up in the middle. Besides, she had been telling me that she was done going out all the time.
We got out and started walking. We went towards the usual spot and there was a blue bag on the ground. I stopped and picked it up to reveal a paper underneath. I looked at the paper and the ink was too smudged to read.
"I wonder what it said." I said looking at him as I held the flimsy wet paper.
"It doesn't matter now." He shrugged lightly.
"Well it must've meant something to the person who wrote it. This doesn't look old so it could be recent. Someone else could be out here." I said as we kept walking.
"We know we aren't alone. Those people came and other people died." He said as I looked at him sadly.
"How come you always wanna come out here?" I asked as I folded the paper.
"Cause I want to be a kid. Don't you?" He asked still looking forward.
"We aren't kids anymore. We haven't been and we can't be again." I explained calmly. We kept walking and we sat down against the log. He grabbed a comic and I wrote in the extra notebook.
We were quiet, like usual. Not after long we heard crunching. "Let's get in the tree." I said as I stood up.
"No I'll go take care of it." He said standing up.
"It's fine it sounds like only one." I said looking at him.
"Exactly." He responded as he squared looking forward. "It's just Michonne and Spencer." He said sitting back down.
"What were they up to?" I asked confused. I wondered if they were doing a dry run or something.
"Just walking." He answered as he opened his comic back up and looked at it.
"Why won't you talk to me?" I asked quietly as I stood behind him. It was quiet for a second.
"I talk to you. We just talked. We're talking right now." He responded not turning around.
"When's the last time you wanted to talk to me?" I asked crossing my arms lightly. "I- It hurts you know? I feel like you're ignoring me. I know you want space but I don't." I said trying not to get upset.
"We are always hanging out. What do you mean?" He asked turning around.
"Sitting together quietly isn't hanging out. You're avoiding my questions." I responded as I sat on the log next to him. "I know how you're feeling okay? I just want to-"
"You don't." He shook his head. "You don't know how I feel okay? And you don't need to try and make me better."
"That's not what I wanted to do." I defended myself. "I just want you to be with me. You're here, but you're not really here. I just want you back."
"I'm still me, Lyla." He responded upset.
"No. You're different now." I replied.
"Yeah. I don't have an eye anymore." He said almost angry.
"You know that's not what I meant." I stated. I shook my head lightly. "If you were still you, you wouldn't shut me out like this. I miss you. If you're different I get it, but no matter what I know you wouldn't shut me out if you were okay." I explained looking at the ground.
He didn't respond and he kept looking at his comic. "I don't want to be out here anymore. Not like this." I said looking through the trees.
He sighed lightly and put his comic in the box. He got up and put his hat on. "Let's go then." He said as he started walking.
I put my hair behind my ear and I followed close behind. We heard crunching and then growling and Carl went towards the noise. "Do you have to?" I asked looking at him.
"Michonne's out here. I can't leave it." He answered as I nodded. We walked towards it and we noticed who it was. Deanna.
"I'll do it." I said as I started walking to it. Before she died she told me to protect who I loved. It made sense if it was me.
"No." Carl said as he grabbed my arm.
"Why not?" I asked as we backed up and the walker Deanna followed.
"Because it's not our place." He responded looking at it.
"Deanna told me to protect the people I loved. That's what I'm gonna do." I responded as he looked to the walker.
"No. Just go back home." He said as he looked at her.
"Carl, no." I scrunched my eyebrows frustrated as Deanna got closer. I went towards her and Carl moved me out of the way. With my leg not being at 100% I wobbled almost falling over.
"You're not killing it. It's not your place." He angrily replied.
"And it's yours?" I asked angrily.
"No. I'm dealing with it. You said you wanted to not come out anymore, so just go back." He instructed as he pushed the walker on the ground.
"Why are you acting like this? Why are you doing this?" I asked looking at him almost about to cry because I was so mad.
"Just go!" He yelled as he looked at me. I shook my head and walked away towards the camp. I would've ran but my foot wasn't ready for that yet.
As I walked I saw two walkers coming close to me. I pulled my two knives out and got ready to attack. I shook my foot lightly to stretch it so I could move. I went for the first one and it fell. I got the second and it fell with my knife in its head.
I sighed and looked around and there was another suddenly in my face. It knocked me down and I felt my leg hurt from the pressure. I looked at the walker and tried to fight it off.
I pushed it over and went the other way to get up. It somehow lunged at me and it bit the back of my shoulder.
"Ah!" I yelled as I got my knife and turned my head as much as I could and stabbed its head. It let go of its grip and fell. "Oh no." I sighed lightly as I looked at my shoulder. I could only see the corner of the bite. It didn't finish biting me so it was just teeth marks.
I got up and headed towards the camp breathing heavily in shock, fear, and maybe even regret. It hurt but it wasn't the worst pain ever, at least not yet. I was so scared as to how everyone would take it. It worried me.
It wasn't the time for this to happen to me. I didn't deserve this and I knew I was strong, but all of that was about to stop mattering.
I climbed over the fence and got inside. I went to my house and straight to grab a clean shirt and a bandage. I turned to look at it in the mirror and I started to cry. I cleaned it sadly, upset that this was even happening. Who wouldn't be?
I covered it as it stung lightly. I looked to see my face turning a bit pail. A bite usually took a few days to turn you, which made me even more scared for my impending doom.
I went into my room with my new set of clothes and I cried. My best friend, my boyfriend couldn't even confide in me when he was upset. I just had to deal with it. There was nothing I could do. I just wanted him to talk to me. I wanted to tell him what happened to me. I'd do anything for just that.
I sat there for a while doing some PT to get my leg as close back to how it used to be. Stretching and all that. I was still crying every once in a while, partially from pain, partially from Carl. I saw the door open and Michonne walked in.
She looked at me worried. "Lyla Rose?" She said as she came over noticing my tears. "What happened?" She asked as I look to her and I felt my eyes well up with tears.
"Everything is not going to be okay." I cried to her as she wrapped her hands around me.
"Yes it will." She answered holding my head lightly. "Fight with Carl?" She asked as she looked at me caringly.
I nodded. I couldn't do this to her. I couldn't tell her the real reason. She seemed so happy. I couldn't make her sad.
"What happened?" She questioned me.
"He isn't talking to me. I'm worried for him and he won't accept my help or even tell me what's wrong." I sniffed looking to her.
"That's how boys are. He'll tell you, he just had to be ready." She nodded to me.
"I don't think I can wait any longer." I said more literally then she probably thought.
"Well he will come around soon. I'm sure of it." She smiled lightly. "Everything will be okay, okay?"
I looked down and nodded lightly. She put her hand on my head and then walked at. I was going to lose so much.
I couldn't do anything about it.