Marley can't sleep. She can feel the magnetic field pulling on her to creep down the stairs and find him.
She wonders if he's awake and feels it too. Or if he's fast asleep like everyone else in the house.
Throwing the blankets off of herself, Marley is convinced that she's only going to check and make sure he's comfortable. That's it.
No kissing.
No funny business.
Carefully, she turns the doorknob and slides out into the hallway. Feels along the wall until she reaches the stairs.
Thankfully the ones in her father's house are far less creaky than the stairs in her old one. The moonlight shining in through the downstairs windows is enough to guide her to the first floor.
She was down here just hours ago. Her and Harry watched some TV movie that was on. Chaperoned by Loraine, of course. And after the credits started to roll, Marley was nearly dragged from the living room.
At the stroke of midnight like Cinderella.
Now, at 2 am, she's breaking her imposed curfew and searching for her prince herself. And when she steps into the living room, she can barely make out a figure laying across the couch.
"Babe?" She whispers. "Harry, are you awake?" Carefully, Marley creeps over and kneels beside the edge of the sofa.
His breathing is slow and even. And for a moment she thinks he's asleep. But then he smiles and Marley can see the low light reflecting in his eyes.
Without a word, he leans in and kisses her. Hand slipping around to the nape of her neck, pulling her closer.
Their closeness feels like a breath of fresh air to Marley. She sighs and melts into the kiss. Because her boy of summer grass and warm breezes melts her.
Every time.
"Well, hi." Harry smiles. Lips barely brushing hers. "Shouldn't you be asleep?"
She shrugs. Reveling in their closeness. "Shouldn't you?"
"I thought I was already dreaming." He smirks and meets their lips again.
Marley rolls her eyes, smiling against his mouth, and kisses him back.
When they pull apart again, she says, "I couldn't sleep."
"Why not?" He tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. Concerned for his melting-rivers-and-budding-daisies girl.
She leans her head into his hand and he cups her cheek. Thumb moving slowly across her temple. "I missed you."
The darkness makes her say things she otherwise might not in daylight. And the thought of missing him when he goes home suddenly seems unbearable.
"I don't want to live here, Harry." Marley says. Eyes stinging. "I hate being so far—"
"Shh," He hushes her. Kisses her forehead. And sits up. Pulling her onto his lap.
Marley wraps her arms around his shoulders. Tucks her head into the crook of his neck. Doesn't want to let herself cry, but a single tear escapes.
She quickly wipes it away.
"We'll make it work." He promises. But his voice cracks and Marley is sure that he is just as uncertain as she is.
They're young. They don't know a single thing about long distance relationships. All they know is stolen kisses between classes and going to dances together. But now they go to different schools and walk different hallways and will never see each other.
They could maybe visit each other on weekends. But how long could they keep that up? A month? Or two? And then what? Their paths are charging forward but no longer going in the same direction. And trying to hold on will only hurt someone, if not them both.
Right?
At least that's how Marley sees it. There can't possibly be a happy ending when theirs would require so much work.
"How?" She asks. Hoping he will have some kind of magical answer.
"I don't know." He says.
______________
The sun is barely peaking over the horizon when Marley wakes up. Still on the couch, entwined with a sleeping Harry.
The sunlight slowly fills the room and she stays there until the blinds on the windows cast linear shadows across his face. He looks beautiful. Like a masterpiece. There with the golden light patterned on his jaw.
She tries to slip away without waking him. But doesn't get very far before he groans and pulls her back in, arms tightening around her waist.
"I have to go back upstairs before they wake up." She says. But loves the way his arms feel around her. So she doesn't fight to get up.
She isn't sure how much time they have left. Today and in general. As much as she loves him, and thinks—knows—he loves her, she's convinced no one could love her enough to deal with the distance.
He doesn't love you. He only kept you around because you slept with him. He will find someone prettier and better back home and you will never see—
Marley gets up abruptly.
"Hey!" Harry protests. His hair has grown out a bit and it flops down on his forehead when he sits up.
"Sorry I thought I heard them." She lies. "I'm going back to my room."
"Wait." Harry takes her hand, tugging gently. But she resists. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." She says. "I'm just worried about them finding me down here."
"Okay," he kisses the back of her hand and lets it go. "I love you."
She smiles. And heads toward the stairs.
The day passes far too quickly. And Marley finds herself back outside in the cold, wishing miles were shorter, their homes were closer, and time went slower so he wouldn't have to leave yet.
Her newfound family leaves them to say goodbye alone. And for a moment she wishes they were standing there with her when Harry finally releases her. And leaves her with nothing but the ache in her heart to cling to.
Despite the cold, she makes no move to walk inside as he gets into his car. And he rolls down his window and pulls her in for another kiss.
"Stay." She says.
"Come with me." He says.
And they both smile sad smiles because they can't do either of those things.
"I'll call you when I get home." Harry promises.
"And not a second later." She says.
He nods kisses the back of her hand. Like this morning.
Marley stands in the driveway, arms wrapped around herself for warmth, as he starts the engine and pulls away.
She stays there long after his car is out of sight. Long after her fingers go numb and all sense of warmth is gone.
Her melting rivers freeze over. Her budding daisies are encased in crystallized ice. And she's back to being an icicles-and-frost-bitten-noses girl.
After a while, she begins to shiver and decides to go back inside. But the chill doesn't leave her.
That night she pulls on Harry's sweatshirt before bed. And finally the shivers subside.