Sitting around the dining table, nobody spoke. There was a lot that needed to be said, but no one seemed to to know where to start. Tears never stopped running down my mother's face as she just sat staring into her tea cup and while I wanted to care, I just couldn't.
"So, all this time and you never thought she deserved the truth?" Luke broke the silence and the earlier loyalty they had shown our, well their, father was gone.
Jack had left after it turned out this was actually for real and no one stopped him. He'd be back, his temper often matched mine which was a gift from Mum. I didn't doubt that he would soon walk in, say something we all needed to hear and everything would be okay again. Until then, I wasn't sure what to do.
"From the moment Samara was born we knew. She was different, always has been." Dad sighed, hanging his head between his hands as he suddenly looked about twenty years older than he should.
"So who is this David guy exactly?" Luke demanded, looking at me as though the guilt of the moment should be all his. "Samara's, biological, ah, well, father?"
He said each word like they were coming out in a foreign language, one he didn't like. I could answer him, tell him what I knew and save my parents the shame of revealing all the information about their secret. It would be easy enough to say, well David is a vampire Luke, so that makes me more of a freak than we've always thought too! Only that didn't really answer his question.
"Nevermind him." I interrupt, surprised at how normal I actually sound. "How did this happen? You and Dad have always been together. You said after you met that first time, you knew you were mates and all that bullshit. Were you attacked, I've heard that if-"
"David didn't attack me. He isn't like that. Well, he wasn't when I used to know him." Mum sucked in a deep breath, but didn't look at any of us as she continued. "It was my fault. I was like you darling. I didn't want to be a werewolf. I hated pack life. Things were stricter back then and we were expected to simply just obey not just our fathers wishes, but pack too. We were females, our opinion didn't matter."
"You were raised in the eighties, I find that hard to believe." I snap. It wasn't like it was the twenties where women were fighting for their rights. "Grandad wasn't even-"
"He wasn't the man you knew. He'd softened by then. Society may have moved on, but the pack hadn't. I wasn't the only one, all of us had enough of the way things were and we fought against the pack laws as often and how ever we could until change finally happened." She sighed. "I met David at your Uncle's twenty first birthday party. He wasn't a shifter so of course I was interested in him, it only helped he was rich and well, I found him attractive. You see, if we hadn't found a possible mate by twenty five, the pack would select one for us. I was twenty four and determined not to do what they wanted."
"But you two have always said you're mates." Looking at my brother, this seemed to be hardest on him and Jack right now. "So even that isn't true?"
"It is." Dad growled and Mum continued as though neither had spoken.
"David was new and exciting. He'd just come back from studying in Europe and since his parents were going through a divorce, he was enjoying wasting his trust fund just to annoy them. So was I. We went to red carpet events, exclusive restaurants and clubs. The wine came from a winery he purchased just so make me that blend. There were constant gifts and for someone who never really had a lot, I was easily caught up in his way of life. I thought it could really be true love. I was young and naive and-"
"And then we met." Dad added as Mum seemed to drift away into memories rarely visited.
"We did. You know what it's like for our kind. The mate bond is impossible to ignore and try as I did to fight it, David was simply a novelty and I broke it off."
The one thing that clearly stuck out me was she didn't know he was a vampire, then again maybe he wasn't when she knew him. Was that even possible?
"Where you ah, pregnant, then?" I asked, stumbling with the question as it was the hardest one to ask for so many reasons.
"No. Despite everything, it was the day before our wedding day that he called me. He sounded, sick. Depressed. I felt guilty for how I had just ended things and barely a month later I was marrying another man. He asked to see me and so I went." Fresh tears appeared now as the air seemed to vanish out of the room. "I'm not proud of how we ended things. He had, changed. Feelings I didn't think were real proved hard to ignore and there was this new, power about him. He was stronger, more charming. Something that was missing when we were together was now there and it took me by surprise and, and-"
"He had been turned into a vampire." I point out bluntly.
"I know, but it was still him too. It hadn't been done long, but it didn't matter. I told him after that we were completely done. He knew what I really was now too and well, it was our final goodbye. I left and never saw him again." She finished, the hint of regret unmissable.
"Even after you found out you were pregnant?" After that, my doubt was clear.
"She told me what happened a couple of weeks before you were born." Dad took over now as he went to stand behind Mum, his hands resting on her shaking shoulders as she couldn't talk anymore. "The doctors were already worried about you. You weren't growing like a normal pup, they kept saying there was a chance of failure to thrive if you weren't born soon so they could look after you. Of course once you were here, knowing what had happened, we made the decision to keep it a secret and just hoped as you grew you would still be like us."
"But I didn't keep it a secret." Mum managed to get out. "I told him."
"You did?" I wasn't sure what to think now. The calm state that had taken over, the reassurance of always knowing I was different and for good reason vanishing as I almost felt betrayed by David for not saying anything. He was as much to blame as my parents.
"She sent a letter after you were born. It was an old address and we never knew if he even received it. No one knew, at least no one we know. You were only three when someone questioned your parentage. Some shifters near New York who had a little girl just like you in their care. We didn't think it was possible, but beacuse he was freshly changed, there is a time after before they fully transition. We learnt a lot from those people. There was a small vampire coven trying to create hybrids on purpose but they'd put an end to it." Dad explained, but I knew there was a more. "It's never been an issue. We heard stories of what hybrids were like, but you weren't anything like that. You were safe here with us."
"No she wasn't. Growing up was horrible for her and not once did you tell her why!" Luke snapped.
"Every time she came home in tears we wanted to. When the attack happened-" Mum reached for my hand but I pulled it away. "Having you with us, no one knowing what you are, it was better this way. I know it was. You had a normal life, well as normal as it could be. Those other children we found out about never had that chance!"
"And simply being the runt is a good cover. No one here ever suspected anything and when the murders started and they were the first to be killed, we waited and then there were more and-"
"It's why you were wanting her to come home, isn't it? If it was just random and you didn't think they were taking out hybrids, you would have just left her alone and expected her annual christmas visit." Luke seemed to wake up as he stood quickly. "I knew something was up when we first heard about the murders. You've known all if he victims!"
"It's a link no one knows about. They're not just random shifter killings." Dad confirmed, his tone heavy with sadness. "Hybrids are not common, but there are a few out there. There were a few out there. Who ever is killing them seems to know who they are and we didn't want to risk-"
As if it had been in neon writing above our heads, I see one tiny thing he's missing in all of that. They want to leave now to keep me away from my real father, not because they know he was behind it all. The killings are a side issue, not the main thing wrong now.
"You have no idea, do you?" I stand up too, confused at how this was actually my life.
"What?" Dad and Luke ask in unison.
"David hasn't just found me by accident and you can't just move me away and hope that's the last you hear of him again." I take a deep breath as all three of them look at me as conflicted as I feel. "He is the killer."
They aren't as innocent as you'd think. Those things, took something of mine.
Was that something, me?
"I know he's a vampire now, but he wouldn't, he wasn't someone who could-" Mum stuttered, but I knew that was simply something she was saying to try and make herself feel better.
"It's been twenty five years and-" Dad starts, but Mum won't hear it as she leaves the room and Dad chases after her.
A few seconds later their bedroom door slams shut. I can hear their muffled shouting, Luke too as we just awkwardly stand there.
"This doesn't change anything for me Sam." He finally says, and never have I seen him look so sad.
"It should. I'm not-" I don't finish as he pulls me against him in one of his unbearable big hugs.
"No, it doesn't and it won't." He lets me a go and I don't even complain, as for the first time in forever I don't actually feel as though he was seconds away from crushing me. "You ok?"
"You're already treating me different." I try to laugh. "No bear hugs."
"I didn't even think about that. Sorry, you ok?." He scratches his head, before pausing in that wolf like way he often did. "I'm going to go find Jack. You ok here for a bit if I go out quickly?"
"Go, make sure he is ok, well you know?" Luke nods and smiles, and I believe him when he tells me again nothing has changed for him.
With Mum and Dad upstairs, my brothers gone, and all this going around and around in my head, I can't stay in the house. I can't be here anymore. I leave a quick note that I've gone out and I'll be back later. Taking Luke's keys, I also take his car and go to the one place that I know will be open as it always is when you need it to be - Charlie's Bar.
_______________________
The crowd is missing as I go inside, but the warmth wraps around me like a group hug as I leave the cold outside. I thought I wanted to be alone, yet the figure sitting by himself at the empty end of the bar is the only one I want to actually see. Aiden looks up as I take my first step in his direction and he says nothing as I slip onto the stool beside him.
"Didn't expect to see you in here." He frowns as I take his drink, downing the whisky in one go. "That good huh?"
"I need to know that you're not going to leave me. That you meant everything that happened last night." I signal to the woman across the bar for two more drinks and don't look at him as instead I watch her pour.
"I meant it. Sam, what's happened?" It's faint, but it's there; hesitation.
"Keep these coming, please." I force a smile as our drinks are put in front of me and without thinking, I take them both. "Just leave the bottle?"
"Samara, what-" Aiden stops me from pouring more as the woman rather obediently does as I say. Maybe she knows only the broken drink here on Christmas.
"David is my dad, my real dad." I finally look at him, impressed at how well he can hide all his emotions. Not even a raised eyebrow at that little piece of information Aiden? "Surprise!"
"What are you talking about?"
"He and my Mum had a thing. Their last thing was after he became a vamp and this thing," I point at myself, "Is proof of that."
This time he lets me pour myself another drink. Not that he could stop me as he's already across the room and as I turn around, he's out the door.
"Merry, fucking, Christmas!" I call after him.
Well so much for last night then. I stay in the corner, with my new friend Johnnie Walker and stop thinking, feeling and caring. It's a present I can give myself and it's exactly what I wanted.
"Of all the people I expected to see today, you were not one of them." The deep, old voice of Charlie wakes me up and looking around, the bar is empty except for us.
Johnnie is gone, replaced by a big glass of water. Charlie's bulk hovers over me as he moves from behind the bar - something rarely seen and he takes a seat beside me.
"I'm sure it's not as bad as you think it is."
"I'm sure it is." I sigh, sipping the water.
"Want to tell me about it? I'm an excellent listener little hybrid." He talks so gently, I actually believe he cares until I realise what he called me.
"How did you know?"
"I've had a feeling for a few years now. You are also not the first of your kind i have come across." He smiles, which makes me wonder if I am just dreaming all of this. "When you are as old as I am, there are few things in this world that can surprise you."
"You're what, fifty maybe?"
"Maybe." He laughs, a deep belly laugh that sounds just how I imagine Santa to. "Tell me, perhaps I can help?"
So I do. I tell him about Aiden, about the pack, David, my parents and how fun my day has been so far. I'm not sure why I do it or if I feel any better, but I had to talk it out as thinking about it over and over again in my head was giving me a headache.
"Sometimes it easier not to tell the ones we love the truth in order to protect them." He says wisely.
"I don't buy it. Dad has never been the kind of father to me that he was to my brothers. He only kept his mouth shut and did what Mum wanted because he loves her. I've only just been a necessary nuisance and now I know why."
"I have a daughter you know. I made many mistakes with her. I loved her mother, as I'm sure your father loves your mother and when she decided it was best to keep who I really was from her, for her own safety, I agreed."
"How did that work out for you?" I mumble, not really believing his story.
"Terribly. Have you ever met a banshee?"
"No." A what now?
"They are known for their scream. My ears are still ringing from our many disagreements." He winces slightly and I start to believe him. "What I am trying to say is, don't be too hard on your parents. We all do, sometimes stupid, things to protect our young because we love them."
"Yeah well, thanks for the talk but I doubt it." I pause, thinking about David. "And what about my real Dad?"
"I'd like to tell you that you won't have to choose between your parents and him. That I see an easy resolution and next Christmas you'll all be sitting around your dinner table laughing over this."
"What can you tell me then if not a lie?"
"You are young, you are hurting, but do not make any decision in a hurry." Instantly I think of Aiden and what happened last night and as if reading my mind, the old bartender shakes his head. "Do not be angry with him now. I have seen more dysfunctional people than you two come together, even after such great obstacles. Nothing worth fighting for is ever easy."
"He is is the obstacle."
"Oh no little hybrid. There is so much that you have yet to discover." He looks proud of himself and the urge to punch him starts to grow.
"Care to share? What are you, some kind of magical oracle?" I snap.
"I have been called a Fairy Godfather on the odd occasion." Charlie seems to think that is hilarious and laughs so loud and strong, I find my resolve weakening and at least smile with him.
"If you have a daughter, why aren't you with her on Christmas?"
"Her partner and I don't do well with frequent visits, but who says I'm not with her now?" He winks and gets up, whistling to himself as he goes back behind the bar and into the staff area.
"Weird." I look at the water unimpressed and checking the time it's nearly nine o'clock at night. Well, not quite how I expected to spend my day and reaching for my phone, realise I don't have it. Luke's keys are also missing and with a groan, head out into the carpark to find his car gone too. "Shit."
"Don't worry, it's not stolen." Brianna says from behind me and sure enough she steps out of a portal, looking more like the ghost of christmas future than anything else.
"Are you going to a costume party?" The white gown and silver halo is just a bit much.
"No, I was just on my way back from seeing my sisters." She smiles. "Don't you like my halo? It's our own little tradition"
She clicks her fingers and the light that's suddenly above my head tells me enough. "Get rid of it."
"Come on, let's get out of here. I don't trust the fae." She wrinkles her nose in disgust as she looks at the bar.
"So he really is a fairy?"
"Fae and fairies are different. You really have no clue about this world do you?"
"I really don't." I agree. "I'm kind of in a solo mood, any chance you can portal me back to my house or really, just anywhere far, far, away?"
"I don't think Aiden would like me doing that since he asked me-" She frowns.
"I don't think he'll care too much. He pretty much ran out of here when I told him David is my real Dad so you're safe."
The look on her face is what I imagine mine looked like christmas morning when I was five and asked for a pony. There was no pony, but there was a devastated little girl.
"I am sick of that thing meddling all the damn time! We come here as he asked, do a bui of magic he could have done much easier if he wasn't banging on about being retired." I wonder if she meant to think out loud or perhaps she just forgot I was there as she started to pace. "I should go in there and give him a piece of my mind!'
"You do that Glenda. I'm just going to get a cab and-" I pause. "Did you say Charlie got you to come here? What about the pack?
"A few things did really. Money mostly, but Charlie was the one who gave the alphas our contact details. He knew Aiden and said it would be a good job for us." She mused. "As soon as I met you I understood that part."
"I am so done." Turning away from her, I start walking.
Everyone seems to know more than they are sharing. They all think they know best. It doesn't seem to matter than these things they find amusing, actually have huge impacts in my life - in my families lives. Being sheltered from the supernatural world suddenly didn't seem so bad and if I could just rewind time to Mum dragging me back here, I would fight her more, I would plain old refuse to go - hide somewhere until all this blows over and i'm only expected back on birthdays and major holidays.
"Samara, wait!" Brianna calls out. I don't stop. I walk faster, yet she's suddenly in front of me. "Please, stop."
"No. Not until you tell me what else is going on." I demand.
"I can't do that."
"Yes, you can."
"I really can't." She frowns. "Aiden should be the one to talk to you."
"Incase you haven't noticed, he's not here!" I'm not even going to go there right now. "Just, please go away."
"I don't think this is what he meant, but oh well." She mumbles as she grabs my wrist with strength I didn't think she could have.
With a wave of her free hand, a new portal appears. She isn't beside me as I stumble forward and regaining my balance, I'm back at the cabin where Aiden stands by the fire, looking at it like he's expecting it to talk.
"I guess you didn't want to go with her." He looks over at me, and forces a tiny smile. "Sorry, had to go sort out some shit."
"It's fine. I love being alone after a major life event." I shrug, and head towards the door.
"I'm sorry, but I had to do a few things today and just needed a minute to-."
"I'm a person. Apparently your person and I thought you were mine, so I don't know, a goodbye, or that's big news, I just gotta pop out for a bit, would have been nice instead of just boom. Gone. And sorry, you needed s minute?"
"I know. I mean it, I'm sorry." He comes over and pulls me against him. It would be so easy just to disappear in his arms...
"You weren't supposed to do that. I needed someone-"
"And you have me. It's over with the pack. I've told Nathan our business here is finished. I'm all yours now." He kisses my forehead. "But, there is something you have to know."
"Just tell me, I'm so over secrets."
"It's why I left before and honestly, I don't know what to do next."
I freeze. This was it. Like everything else today, this was going to fall apart too.
"Knowing what I do now about you and David, well it complicates things." He moves back towards the fireplace and I feel numb.
"You and David have history right?" I step back towards the door again, unsure of what else could today could bring. "Can't you get over that? It's something I can't control and I'm not expecting him to become the dad I've always wanted or hell, even a part of my life but to break-"
"I'm not ending this. I mean it, and I know this has nothing to do with you. Just, understand if you can, this from my point of view. My grandparents are dead. I told you that, but I never said how." His voice tightened slightly, eyes closing and I already knew the answer. "In some ways, in the vampire world we are family. His creator was the same one that changed my mother making them brother and sister. Their creator ordered him to kill all of us when he learnt of my survival, but they weren't expecting me to be what I am, or to be able to fight back."
"Oh gods." My father killed his family. Well that's a fun way to end the day. I guess I shouldn't have asked what else could go wrong.
"I know you're not like him. I know you're innocent in all of this, but you are apart of it now and I don't know how this can end without me hurting you."
"I guess this is what Charlie was talking about." I sigh.
Aiden groaned, or maybe he growled. It was hard to tell.
"What did he have to say?"
"We have some obstacles to get over and that nothing worth fighting for is ever easy." Ok, that actually makes sense now.
"I hate when that old fae is right." Aiden definitely growled this time and sitting down on the lounge chair, he opened his arms, motioning for me to join him which of course I did. "Don't listen to him. He may be right about that, but he thinks he knows a lot more than he does."
"How do you even know him?"
"I know his son in law and helped them once. Long story, I'll tell you about it another day." He sighed, dropping his arm around my waist. "I am sorry I left like that today."
"Don't make me used to having you just walk out on me."
"I promise I won't." I feel his head on top of mine as we just sit there in front of the fire. "I'm just trying to think of anything else you might want to know about now, rather than later."
"As nice as that would be, I can't handle much more after today. I hate them for not telling me. I hate them for hurting my brothers. How do we move on from this?"
"I don't know, you're asking the wrong person. Did David ever hint that he knew to you? I ah, actually thought you two might have-"
"Oh no. No, don't even go there and honestly, I think he knows. He kept going on about being friends, which I think was his way of trying to get into my life." I close my eyes, listening to the steady beating of Aidens heart beneath my ear. "You know, he told me those he killed deserved it, that he hated shifters and that they were hiding something from him."
"Your mum tell him about you?"
"She said she wrote him a letter after I was born, but it was to an old address. She didn't think he ever got it."
"What if he only did now and that's what started his little, rampage."
"Honestly, I feel sorry for him. If this is all because of that, then my parents are responsible for those innocent people dying. They have to live with that and it doesn't make what he's done ok either." It occured to me then, despite how hard this must be for him - he was letting me do what I needed to do; talk about it, calmly and without judgement. "I'm sorry for what he did to you."
"Don't be. None of that is on you."
"You want to kill him don't you?"
"Yes." He admitted, the words just coming out as easily as if he was talking about the weather. "It was so much easier before."
I sit up and move so I'm straddling him, leaning in to hold him as his arms went around me. My nose rubbed against his neck and I felt him shiver against me, but that's when I saw the silvered circle of a scar. It was faint, but it was there.
"Why do you have a scar here?"
"That was my christmas present from you." He didn't hide his amusement, instead tracing a circle in the same place on me. "You have one too."
"I do?"
"You're taken. It's the vampire equivalent of a wedding ring only much more permanent."
"I guess what we know now explains all of that huh?" I rest my head on his shoulder, feeling surprisingly happy despite all that had happened.
"It does. Do you feel any different?"
"Should I?"
"I'm not sure, but as I told you before, sires genes could possibly determine our dominant side. My father was a shifter and I'm more wolf than vampire so it makes sense." He paused, tensing again. "I told Brianna. She said she had a feeling something was different which is another reason why she had been curious to help you before. She can still help now if you want her to, help you work out what you're capable of."
"What I'm capable of?" I wasn't sure I liked the sound of that.
"You should have their traits. I have their speed, and I'm stronger than the average wolf. I also need to feed on blood occasionally to keep my strength up. What happened when you bit me?"
What was normal just kept changing as he asked such simple questions and I know he is only trying to help. Talking about this just felt awkward and embarrassing, especially since the truth was I liked it.
"Sam, it's alright. We can talk about it later?" He offered.
"I felt hungry, I'd been feeling hungry for a couple of weeks, but didn't matter what I ate, it didn't go away until I bit you. I liked it." I shrug.
"When did you start feeling like that?"
"After the christmas party." I admit.
"I thought something had changed about you that night, but it could have been for two reason. It could have been because of us, as mates being around each other could make what was dormant inside you wake up or it could also be because you met him and as your sire, that could have woken it up too."
"I blame you. I've not been myself since we met." I admit, kissing him.
"I know that feeling." He smiled before kissing me back.
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Sorry for the delay guys. I've had a sick baby who is also teething so doing anything has been impossible, especially when it comes to writing unfortunately. Luckily she's doing much better now so last night I was able to get this up for you all!
Happy Christmas Eve!
Hopefully I can get some more done today - ready to see David again? Also, some regular readers might remember I story I had up once called Banshee Calling? I've nearly finished it now so will repost once done, but do you remember Charlie from that one? This story is set in the same world as when I went to write about them going out, the only place I could think of was one of his bars ... Darius's wouldn't have quite made the same kind of sense haha xx