"Please, Harry. At least go for Louis." Anne has been begging for Harry to go and find a good therapist but he keeps refusing.
"No, mom, no. You don't understand! No one understands! So what a stupid therapist can do?" Harry snapped making Anne sigh. Anne knew for a fact convincing Harry to get help is gonna be hard and she was prepared to not to give up. No matter how many times Harry says no, she's gonna take him to a therapist one way or another.
She just wants him to live with inner peace, not waking up every night screaming, covered in sweat. She hates to see him like that. He's her son after all.
"Please, Harry. Are you sure you don't wanna do that for Louis? You love him a lot, Haz. I know that." Anne squeezed Harry's bicep as a gesture of comfort, but Harry was having none of it.
Louis came waddling into the room with two cups in his hands. One hand suddenly jerked out of nowhere, spilling the beverage in one of the cups he was holding. He pouted and stared at the spilled water as if it's gonna come back to the cup.
Harry stared at the boy with a fond smile. The frown he had on his face a second before is nowhere to be found.
"Aw, babe, it's fine. Let's fill it with more water. Yeah?" Harry asked as he took the cups from Louis' hands. Louis nodded enthusiastically and took Harry's extended hand in his. Harry lead the way to the kitchen and filled the cup with some water. He helped Louis onto one of the chairs in the kitchen and placed the two cups in front of him. He sat next to him and watched as Louis poured water from one cup to the other.
His mind wandered off to what Anne said as he patiently sat there. He thought about how she begged him to even do that for Louis. He looked at Louis and thought about how much he has hurt him and then he thought about Jay. It all lead him back to thinking about his blades again but he was quick to bring himself back to the situation in hand. He thought about how Louis would be left to live alone if he ever said goodbye and it made a shiver run down his spine.
The real reason he didn't want to see a therapist was he didn't want to depend on someone else for his own health. Blame him for that but he still believes he can take care of himself on his own and he's quite not ready to give it up yet. He didn't want to feel like he's depending on someone he doesn't even know and he definitely didn't want to tell all of his secrets to someone he doesn't know.
After all they are just being paid to listen to him rambling about how much of a burden he is to this world.
He still believes that no one would understand and he most definitely doesn't want to tell others how much of a coward he is. He felt like he'd lose his reputation he has put on after so much work and he wasn't up for that. He was a CEO after all and all those responsibilities made him think like he must be strong no matter what for the sake of his reputation and the sake of the company.
Oh, how wrong he was.
He stared at Louis for long and he thought about how much he loves Louis. He thought about how he was forced to stay away from Louis and how he has been the cause for lots of heartbreaks. He didn't want to ruin Louis' life again and he doesn't want Louis to go down than he already is.
He didn't want to see Louis having nightmares even though he, himself also has them. He didn't want to see Louis so scared of little things because he has been punished back in the care home for littlest things like asking someone else to put his zipper down for him. He didn't want to see any more scars on Louis' beautiful skin. He wants none of that.
All he wants to see is Louis being his happy, giggly self.
All those thoughts made Harry's guards fall down. He want to do this for Louis. He wants to live the life he wants with Louis. And he's gonna do this for Louis.
-
"Same therapist? Isn't she trained for doing therapy for special kids?" Anne asked.
"Yeah, she is but I think I would feel more comfortable around her." Harry said, making Anne nod in understanding. She hummed a little as she thought about it and she nodded again.
"That's good I think. Since you are the one who chose her, you'd be more comfortable around her. Plus, you have already met her multiple times." Anne said making Harry nod along. He wasn't quite sure about what he's doing but he's ready to give it a shot for Louis. Speaking of Louis, where is he?
"Where's Lou?" Harry asked, making Anen look around a little and shrug.
"I don't know. Maybe in your room." She said and stood up with Harry to look for Louis. Harry panicked a little. He ran up the stairs to their room but Louis wasn't there.
'God, what if he had another seizure? No, he can't!' Harry is now completely panicking. He looked through every room upstairs and flew down the stairs again. He looked through every room downstairs only to come up with no sign of Louis.
"Mom! Did you find him?" He yelled out and sent maids to look for Louis. He ran out of the back door and ran to the direction where the swimming pool is. He let out a sigh of relief when he saw Louis sitting there with his little feet in the water.
Louis is having so much fun by splashing water around. He bent down to touch water with his hands but it turns out he has leaned a little too much and he stumbled into water. Harry gasped and jumped into water without hesitation. He dived under and found Louis under water. He took a hold of Louis and brought him up. He heard the sound of Louis' sharp intake of breath mixing with his own.
"Baby, are you fine?" Harry asked running his fingers through Louis' damp hair. Louis has his legs wrapped around Harry's waist and Harry's supporting him with one hand under his bum. Louis looked around, still trying to register what just happened but let out a happy squeal as he splashed some water with his hand. Harry chuckled as he watched how Louis didn't see any caution in the situation and got out of the pool with Louis. He found Anne watching them with a fond smile and he returned the smile.
"Want some towels?" Anne asked, which to Harry nodded. Harry took Louis to the bathroom outside and dried him first. He wrapped the towel around Louis and took off his own clothes to dry himself. Louis giggled loudly as he watched Harry drying his hair with a towel making Harry smile fondly at the boy and place a kiss on his forehead.
"So funny? Hm?" Harry asked as he started drying his hair again, just to see Louis giggling again. He wrapped a towel around himself and hoisted Louis up to his hip, not wanting a repeat of 'hot, hot' situation. He thanked god for it being summer not fall or anything or else they'd be freezing to death with just towels around their waist.
"'azzie! 'ater! 'ater!" Louis squealed as they passed the pool again making Harry chuckle.
"No, bubs. You had enough time in it. Maybe, tomorrow, okay?" Harry asked with a smile but he had a hard time resisting Louis' pouty face. He almost got in water with Louis again but Anne saved him.
"Tomorrow, okay angel?" Anne asked as she ran her fingers through Louis' hair. Louis being up high on Harry's hip, he saw the hairpin Anne had on sparkling. He quickly found it interesting and reached out for it.
"Sparkly, isn't it?" Harry asked as he watched Louis trying to take it. Anen chuckled and handed it to Louis. Louis flicked it and watched as it sparkle as the sun rays fell on it. He shrieked out a giggle at that. Harry felt like his heart is gonna burst with love. Anne send him a knowing look while wiggling her brows.
"Oh, sod off mom!" He groaned making Anne let out a chuckle.
"We'd come down for lunch after we are changed." Harry announced as he walked up the stairs with Louis. Louis has his head on Harry's shoulder now, still staring at the hairpin and observing the way the brightness of its sparkles got low.
Harry sat Louis on their bed and walked into their closet. He found some shorts and a shirt for Louis. The shirt has 'Angel' written on it and it made Harry smile fondly. He dressed himself in a pair of sweats and a t shirt and took Louis' clothes into their room to dress the boy up.
"P-pee pee" Louis whimpered holding on to his crotch making Harry's fond smile grow. Everything Louis does is so cute and it makes Harry want to dive into the sea of love and die.
"Let's go, babe." Harry took Louis' hand in his and walked the boy to the bathroom. He helped to Louis do his business and brought him back to the room.
"Do you like the outfit I chose for you?" Harry asked pointing at the outfit laid on the bed. Louis scanned it carefully and looked at all the pretty colors on it. He nodded furiously when he saw how colorful it is. Harry dressed the boy up and picked him up after placing two big kisses on Louis' cheeks. Louis giggled all the way down the stairs as Harry put an extra bounce to every step he takes.
"Here you go! Do you want Hazzie to feed you or do you want to feed yourself?" Harry asked as he placed Louis on a chair of the dining table. Louis didn't get what Harry said since he has lost in all the colors the veggies on the plate held. Harry decided to feed Louis and sat in the middle of Anne and Louis.
"Open your mouth, big fishie! A little fishie is coming!" Harry said excitedly as he brought the spoonful of Louis food his mouth while rocking his hand to make it look like a fish swimming. Louis giggled and opened his mouth wide.
"All done! Finish your juice too, big fishie." Harry said as he handed Louis the cup filled with some juice. He looked at his own untouched meal and took his fork. He didn't have a much appetite but he swallowed down few spoonfuls anyway. He pushed the plate aside after and turned to find Louis has already finished his juice.
"Aren't you gonna finish your meal, Harry?" Anne asked being the mother she is. Harry shrugged and stood up.
"Harry, you need to eat, love. I know you don't feel like eating but it's just few veggies here." Anne said, sending Harry a warning look. Harry sighed and sat down again, wondering to himself about where his table manners has gone.
"Fine, fine." He mumbled as he took his plate again and started eating. It's not like he has an eating problem. It's just he doesn't feel like eating but whatever. It looks like he has no other way around without finishing his meal. Louis got down from his seat as he was eating and Anne excused herself to look for Louis. Harry ate slowly, really not feeling like finishing it. He called a maid and told themt o dump his remaining food, which is a lot. He stood up and walked to the living room to find Louis and Anne watching TV.
"Did you finish your meal?" Anne asked when Harry sat next to Louis.
"Yes, mom. God, I'm not five. Leave me alone." He snapped without meaning to do that. Anne's face flashed sadness for a second but she put on her stern face again.
"You don't have to be five for me to check on your health." Anne fired back making Harry more angrier.
"Just shut up!" He yelled making Louis whimper and cover his ears. Louis looked at Harry with scared eyes and backed away to snuggle to Anne's side.
Harry's breathing has gone wild and his eyes are flashing anger. Anne felt her heart race with fear.
"Haz, it's fine. You don't have to yell, love." She said softly. Harry has told her to shut up and he told her to do that for a reason but here she is talking more. The thought made him so angry.
"I told you to shut the hell up! Shut up!" He yelled more making Louis let out a particularly loud whimper. Anne watched him with eyes that held unbelief and decided to shut up. She didn't understand what suddenly made Harry angry but it was scary.
Harry just stared at the outer space trying to even out his breathing and make the anger leave his body. It took around five minutes for him to calm down. When he is calm, he looked at Louis to find him staring at Harry through his fingers that he has put on his face to block his own view. He looked at Harry like he's watching a scary movie and it made Harry's heart break into million pieces.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, God, I'm sorry!" Harry said desperately trying to heal the heartbreak he caused again. Sure, it wasn't a massive heartbreak but it still was a heartbreak caused by him.
"No, Haz, all is fine. You didn't mean to do that. It's okay." Anne said with a smile and extended the arm he had on Louis' back for Harry to snuggle closer to her and Louis. Harry leaned forward and laid his head on Louis' back. Louis whimpered thinking Harry's gonna hurt him. Harry wanted to cry at the fact that he made Louis scared of him within two minutes.
"I'm sorry, Loulou. I wouldn't yell again. Hazzie promises." He whispered, making a promise again.
But they all knew, he can't keep that promise anymore.
****
(Word Count 2421)
A/N - Hiiii baby potatoes! How are you all? As always, I hope you all are doing great!
Sooooooo sorry for late updates but a little busy and life is kind of sucks these days. But momma is here to make it all feel better soooooo it's okie. (:
anddd I MADE A TUMBLR follow meeee I only have like 4 followers there. xD It's @/mommas-bratty-princess
and about drama in this book. They'd end soon. I promise!
I'm sleepy now so byeeeeeeeeeeee
Have a nice day/ night! I love you all to death! (: xxxxxxx
QOTC - Stuffies or no stuffies?
Answer - STUFFIES! but I can't cuddle them because of my asthma. It sucks. )))):
-Ash