Hailey's POV
Four days have gone by and I have tried every second ignoring and running away from Zach. It was tiring to me as well as my wolf. I just didn't want to see or hear him say anything. The only thing I have done was spend as much time as possible with Hayden. He was amazing and loving and just perfect. It felt as if I got my old Hayden back, who loved me and helped me when I was small. Felt I was finally with family, with dad and mom.
We talked about everything that was there to talk about. He would teach me tricks and fighting lessons which I enjoyed the most. When he praised me, I went into cloud 9 and it was impossible for someone to bring me down. The rest of my gang were mingling with the pack members and getting along. It was nice to see everyone back to their happy self. No matter what I had really missed this place. I had missed my home.
But I couldn't say the same for Nate. He was always quiet and sad. Whenever I saw him, he looked haggard with huge purple bags on his eyes. When I asked him what was the matter he would just shake his head, kiss my forehead and go lock himself in his room. I didn't know what was wrong, he won't even talk to me and that was what hurt more. Didn't he trust me? I barely saw him in a day. I had no clue whether I should demand answers from him. This was so not him.
It was almost midnight and I haven't seen him for nearly two days. This was it, my patience has run out. I cannot watch him suffer any longer. I swear I'll force him to talk to me whether he liked it or not. Enough was enough. It was clear he was sad and depressed and he needed somebody. No matter what he said tomorrow I will confront him. I walked out of the bathroom, when I hear the door open quietly.
"What you think you're doing?" I asked as Zach shut the door behind him. It was late and I was really sleepy.
"I wanted to talk to you." He sated walking towards me. I raised my hands stopping him mid-way.
"But I don't want to talk to you." I barked. I was really irritated and just wanted to sleep it off. Seeing him again, just made me hurt more.
"Hailey please, just hear me out." He said. I heard the desperation in his voice. I couldn't stop the nod that came from me. He gave me his dazzling smile which left me all hot and bothered. Gosh these horny wolf hormones will really burn me someday.
"Hailey I know that you left because of me. No matter what I say or do this fact won't change. But I swear the minute you left me I have always felt this hole inside of me that won't ever go. After you left us, left me, life has become meaningless. If I wasn't an alpha and that an entire pack depended on me, I would have given up everything. I have missed you so much that every inch of my body hurts. My wolf is unresponsive and doesn't talk to me. I have not felt complete or happy these three years. You are what I need." He stopped for a breath and I didn't want him to stop.
"All those years back, I was an asshole who never knew what it meant to love and accept someone. My pride and reputation was all I could think of. But now I have changed, I have become someone who is worthy for you. It's been hell without you. I can't do this anymore Hailey. Please I beg you, give me one chance."
My heart was beating incredibly fast. Hearing him say these words felt soothing, like a balm. I could feel my wounds healing. I could feel that forgiving him was necessary. But before I could open my mouth to tell him that I feel the same way, a sickening thought entered my mind.
"How can I believe you? Not long after I left you mated with another wolf. Do you know how much I suffered because of that? Did you have any idea what I went through?" I said my voice rising with every word. I didn't care if I was loud, now was the time I needed answers.
"Of course you don't. You are an alpha, the entire pack needs you. Did it ever cross your mind what I need. Did you know that every day I felt empty, sad and alone? Did you know every day I doubted whether I was even worth living? No you didn't. So you have no right to say that you went through hell, because I know what hell is." I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I wanted to fall and crawl into a corner and just let the pain fade. But I wouldn't give him the chance of seeing me weak. He should know that after everything I survived. I don't need him.
"See this right here." I said pulling my t-shirt collar down, revealing my exposed neck. His eyes dropped to my shoulder and narrowed. He gazed at the black burnt spot, faded yet visible to the naked eye.
"Is that--?" he stammered. He reached out for me but I stepped back.
"Yes that is what you gave me. This is the one thing you have ever given me Alpha Zachary. The one thing that helped me realize every day that it wasn't just a bad dream. I was rejected by the one person who was meant for me and me only. My mate, who would hold me, cry with me, laugh with me, do everything together, you were supposed to be everything I ever wanted." I whispered feeling drained and dizzy. Blinking I focused on him as his knees gave way and he knelt in front of me.
"Hailey baby, trust me. I haven't touched Esther in that way. I only marked her because I was a coward." He cried, huge tears falling out of his eyes. I scrunched up in disbelief. An alpha calling himself a coward, well that's a first.
"Yes I couldn't face the pack if they found out I had driven away their Luna. Father wanted me to mate with a strong she wolf and didn't have the courage to stand and say that I had found my mate. So I did the thing any coward would do. I lied and agreed with my father. But I swear I haven't mated with her. She knew that from the beginning that this was just a deal. You were the only one I would allow myself to be closed to. Please Hailey, believe me." He bent his head in defeat. I felt his agony flow towards me. My hands wanted to dig itself in his soft black hair and feel his hot skin on mine.
"Zach, I believe you, I really do, but I need time. You have hurt me more than anyone and seeing you now, has opened new as well as old wounds. Give me time." I said in a low voice. He got up and walked till he was close to me yet not touching me.
"Take all the time you want. I won't be going anywhere." He smiled a very sad yet happy smile. I nodded at him, suddenly feeling a bit awkward. Our proximity was making my wolf go wild and animalistic. I was aroused by his scent and nothing could have embarrassed me more. He must have noticed or rather smelt my arousal because he coughed slightly and walked to the door.
"Well ummm. Good night." He whispered and I swear I saw a slight blush on his cheeks. It was cute and I wanted to awe at him but stopped myself from doing so. I watched him leave with a stupid smile on my face.
"Snap out of it Hailey." I scolded myself. I sat down on the bed looking out of the window.
Suddenly Nate's face flashed through my eyes, he looked sad and hurt. And just like that it disappeared. It was so weird I couldn't understand what was happening. A feeling of desperation filled me. It crept up my bones and my mind became empty. This sudden urge of wanting to see Nate entered me. It was way past midnight but I just wanted to see his face. I tried calling out to him through the mind link but no answer. It felt as if there was no one on the other side.
"Nate, please answer me" I begged. He stilled didn't respond. This wasn't like him, he would always reply even if he was tired or sleepy. My instincts filled me with dread. I couldn't shake the feeling that he was in danger.
"Nate dammit, just give me a sign that you're okay." I said in my mind, wishing I would hear his voice.
Running out of the room, I let my nose guide me. His scent was faint but as I neared the first floor it grew stronger. I ran till my feet stopped at an ok door. It was closed but I was sure he was here. His scent was very strong here, just behind the door.
"Hailey." I heard his faint voice. It was soft and low, almost a whisper and I didn't fail to hear the pain in it. Without thinking twice I broke open the door and watched it fall into the room in pieces. A strong drift of blood hit me and I had to shake my head to clear it. I quickly took a sniff and broke into a run.
The room was empty. The bed looked neat; there was no sign of anyone. I turned to the bathroom and opened it. The sight inside made me faint and my dinner threatened to come out. I held a hand to my mouth, not wanting to believe this was real.
"No no no no no." I chanted as I ran to his lifeless body. The floor was flooded with red, his blood. The water was flowing rapidly from the tap and onto his deeply cut wrist.
"Nate Nate please open your eyes. No no please Nate, open your eyes. It's me Hailey. Please look at me." I begged, hugging his head and frantically pressing my fingers to his neck. There was a faint pulse and that made me breathe out in relief but it fell and I couldn't get a pulse. I was losing him. I prayed to whoever was listening, hoping this was a prank and he would get up now and laugh saying 'fooled yea.'
But it didn't happen. I didn't know what to do. My mind was going haywire seeing his blood. I quickly tried to calm my mind, reaching under his arm I tried to pull him towards the door. He was dead on heavy and just wouldn't budge. Trying again I pulled with all my might but my wolf was not strong enough. Another couple of tries I gave up and just quickly took a towel and typed it tightly around his wrist.
"Kevin, Tyler, Ethan, please please come fast. It's Nate, I'm losing him." I screamed in my mind hoping they were awake.
"Hailey." Nate whispered in a croaked voice. "I'm here Nate." I said, cupping his face in my hands. He opened his eyes and instead of those love and happy filled brown eyes, I saw empty, cold, dead eyes staring at me.
"It doesn't hurt anymore. I feel free now. The pain is gone Hailey. I don't feel it anymore." He whispered. I could barely understand what he said. His heart was beating so low and I was scared it would be too lat.
"No Nate hold on. Please hold on for me. Don't leave me. I can't live without you." I yelled shaking his lifeless head in my arms.
"I don't feel it." He whispered, a small smile forming on his lips. I pulled his head into me and just held onto him, wishing for someone to come. My tears mixed with the blood and water. I couldn't picture my life without Nate. I just couldn't. No I won't think about that, he isn't going anywhere until I say saw. I closed my eyes and let all the happy memories I had with him enter our mind link, hoping that he saw them too and know that I needed him.
He was suddenly yanked away from me and I was left sitting there, soaked and alone. I saw Ethan and Kevin carry him and take him away, followed by Tyler. I couldn't move, my eyes were fixed on Nate's still arm dangling down. They disappeared and I still couldn't move to help them. The water rippled under me and I just stared at that river of red water as it travelled from the tap to the drain. My mind was blank, my limbs heavy.
My mind link to Nate faded; it was dim like the last flame of a candle, just waiting to be blown away. I wanted to just curse and hit everything next to me. I turned my head and a small, sharp Swiss army knife was lying near the tub. I picked it up and turn it in my hands. I suddenly recognize it as the gift I had given him for his 18th birthday. I threw my head back and let it all out.
"Nate." I screamed.