Alexander
I sit on the top of the stair case and watch from my hiding place in silence. There is something about this woman that doesn't seem right to me. She appeared here unannounced and uninvited, yet she didn't seem concerned by the possibility of Thomas not letting her into his home. It has to be said that I was probably the only one who was surprised when he had let her in. Her first steps through the doorway fill me with unease. She moves too gracefully, it's almost as if she is floating above the floor instead of trodding upon it. I don't like her.
"This is...quite the surprise." Thomas finally breaks the silence. The pair simply stare at one another for a moment before the woman practically throws herself into his arms. My grip on the wood of the steps tightens and electric shocks of pain race from my nails to my elbows. She grips onto the back of his neck and lingers there for longer than is appropriate. Who is she? What gives her the right to hold him like that? The air is buzzing with tension and I know that the storm has struck.
"I'm sorry that I have encroached on your personal time Thomas." She murmurs as she slowly slips out of his arms. "I simply had to see you." I slide out of my hiding place and move to a more covert position as they begin to move into the living room. "We haven't seen each other in almost three years Thomas."
"Yes." He says emotionlessly. "It has been quite some time."
"Are you quite alight?" She asks curiously. I keep my back flush against the wall as I continue to listen to their discourse. My eyes scrunch closed tightly as I imagine her placing a gentle hand on his cheek and he leaning into her touch. "You are acting rather strangely Thomas. Should I call someone?"
"I'm fine, Martha."
Martha?
The entire world seems to stop spinning and everything falls into painful silence. This can't be real. I push myself away from the wall and numbly walk back towards the room that Jefferson had assigned to me. The door closes harshly behind me and I briefly regret closing it with so much force, but all feeling melts away as I fall face first into the mattress.
She shouldn't be here. She can't be here. I cling onto the fluffy comforter as I feel my heart begin to fall apart in my chest. I plead with God to make this pain stop, but my prayers go unanswered yet again. The familiar burn of tears scorches behind my eyelids and I do everything within my power to stop myself from sobbing.
Why am I breaking down like this? Get a hold of yourself Alexander! I scold myself over and over again, but nothing stops the flow of the tears. How is she alive? She has been dead for three years. None of this should be real!
What is supposed to happen now? Thomas's fiancee has somehow returned to him from a place that is supposed to be inescapable. I suppose that my welcome here will have reached its gruesome end. Tears slide down my cheeks relentlessly and my lips begin to quiver. I am weeping as if I had just had my heart broken. I grip onto my chest and cradle my heart in my hands. My chest aches and I feel slightly empty on the inside.
It feels as if my heart has simply stopped beating.
There is a solid knock on the door and I jump from the sound of it. I know that Thomas is standing on the other side of the door and my heart is pounding in apprehension of what is to come when that door opens. No words escape me as I stare blankly at the door as fear continues to grip at my throat. There is another knock and I bury my face into the comforter. Trembles race through my body as the door opens and I hear the floor creak underneath his weight.
"Alexander?" I grip onto the comforter with a painfully tight grip as I hear him inch closer to him. "Hey, are you alright?" I say nothing as I pull the comforter even closer to me. "I know that you can hear me. Talk to me." He tries to pull me away from the comforter and I can feel my grip beginning to slip. "Alex, stop this!" He rolls me over and his eyes widen as he sees the mess that has become my face.
His eyes glance all over my face and his eyes seem to get wider and wider the more he sees. Tear stains and red eyes look back at him as fresh tears roll down my cheeks. He looks almost frightened by what he sees.
"You're crying." He murmurs.
"No shit." I croak as I try to roll away from him. He grabs onto me and pins me beneath him. My throat constricts as he straddles my hips and holds me down by my wrists. I can't speak when he looks at me like this. Like I am precious to him. Irreplaceable.
"Why are you crying?" He whispers as he leans close to me, his nose just brushing mine. My voice catches in my throat slightly as his warm breath hits my skin.
"You...You shouldn't be here with me."
"What are you talking about?" He asks confusedly, pulling away slightly.
"You shouldn't be with me." I repeat, a fresh wave of tears rolling down my cheeks. "You should go be with her."
"Alexander, can you stop talking nonsense for a few seconds and just tell me what is going on?" He brushes his thumbs over my pulse points on my wrists and I struggle to keep my eyes from fluttering at the warm feeling that spreads through me from his touch. Don't think like this Alex. Remember who he is...who his heart really wants. My chest aches painfully at the thought.
"Go be with Martha, I'm done with you."