Author's Note:
I'm back! I don't know if it's for good or not yet, but I do have an update for you! I hope I will be able to continue the book, but for now, I'm mostly focusing on school and stuff, and, to be entirely honest, I think my higher priority is my other book, but I think I will work on this one as much as I possibly can. I have one or two chapters of that book written as of now, so I think that I'm going to be trying to write this a lot more.
So, without further ado, or I Do, here is I Am Not Throwing Away My Shot, Chapter Nine.
John's POV:
No, Alex! You're perfect! I wanted to scream. Why would he do this to himself?
He wouldn't mean anyone's eyes. He looked down, studying the sheets. I felt my eyes well up as I saw a tear slide down his pale cheek. I carefully walked over to him, and I think everyone realized that we needed some time alone because they all, including the doctor, silently left the room and quietly closed the door behind them.
"Alex..." I whispered.
"Alex." I placed a finger beneath his chin and slowly pushed his head up. He still wouldn't meet my gaze.
"Alex, look at me," I said softly. He looked up quickly before looking away again.
"Alexander, why do you think like that?"
I..." He bit his lip and looked down, his brown hair sliding in front of his chocolaty brown eyes.
I brushed his hair back behind his ears.
"Alex. Look at me." I quietly commanded him.
He did. I held his gaze as more tears slid down his cheeks. I brushed them away with the pads of my thumbs. "Don't cry. I love you." I sat down on the narrow hospital bed and kissed his cheek. "I love you," I repeated.
He curled up in my side, and I slid my arms around his small frame. "I love you," he repeated my words so quietly I nearly missed it.
"Promise me this, Alexander." He looked up at me and sniffled.
"If you have any problems, you know that I will listen. Always." I brushed my fingers through his thick, dark hair. "I promise I will listen."
He nodded shakily. "I promise."
I let out a deep sigh and pulled my Alexander close to my chest.
"I love you, John."
"I love you, too, Alexander Hamilton. I love you."