The car ride was spent mostly in silence, other than the radio playing rock music and the occasional questions from Luke asking if I was okay.
I was starting to grow rather impatient. I want nothing more than to be out of this car, and on the flat ground.
The music is giving me a headache, Niall's driving is horrendous, and if Luke asks me one more time about what is wrong, I am going to punch him.
"So, you're Khloe, right?"
I glanced over my shoulder to see Mia leaning closer to get a better look out the windshield while she popped her gum.
"Uhh, yeah.." I've never talked to her before and I wasn't really planning on it either, but I didn't want to be rude.
She's just not my type I guess. She's obviously one of the campus sluts, being in a group with Ashley and all- and me being me, I'm not into all the sleeping around and partying.
"Cool, so like, are you a freshy or did you transfer?", she asked, looking into the rear view mirror to fix or should I say, fluff' her hair.
Harry turned the music down, and I gave a sympathetic smile for us kind of talking in his ear.
"I'm a freshman. I moved here from Florida." I squirmed on Luke's lap as he began drawing ticklish circles on my stomach under the hem of my shirt.
"So is it true that the parties are huge? Or that bartenders slip ecstasy into your drinks to totally fuck you up?" she popped her gum again with a huge grin.
"She wouldn't know.", Niall spoke up for the first time, making us all turn our heads.
What does he mean that I don't know? Just because I don't go to parties and classify them as being 'fun' doesn't mean that I don't know what happens at them. I grew up around it.
I glared at him, turning back to the twig in the backseat.
"Actually, for your information, yes, I do know.", I shot a glare at Niall who was staring at me with an amused look as we waited for the light to turn green. "And, yes. That would be correct.", I stated, smiling back at Mia.
"That is so cool!" I gave her a look of bewilderment before shaking my head lightly and chuckling.
um... okay.
"It can be quite scary, actually.", I added quietly, thinking back to the first and last time when I was drugged.
"You've tried it?!", she asked and everyone's heads turned to me. The blood rushed to my face as well as the heat.
"That's amazing! Was it fun?" Mia continued, excitement growing by the millisecond.
"I don't believe you.", Niall stated, taking a turn on to the express way.
I leant against Luke, relaxing into his hold.
"Me either." Perrie stated, followed by a bunch of 'mhmm's'.
"It's true.", I mumbled as the memory came back once again. "I was drugged... by my best friend." I stated.
I didn't really want to talk about it anymore, but I could tell by all of their faces that they definitely weren't going to let this one slide.
Luke's head tilted to the side to stare down at me as his eyebrows knitted in confusion.
"You call a person who drugged you a friend?" His voice rang through my ears. I shrunk down, leaning between the window and his shoulder.
Can we just be there already? I don't want to tell them. I don't want to talk about it. And I most certainly don't want to remember it. The hardest thing to do is forget something when everyone keeps blabbing on about it.
It is my fault though, I guess. I shouldn't have said anything. I should've just kept my mouth shut and my thoughts to myself.
"I don't know... can we not talk about it please?"
"C'mon babe, I like this whole rebel status that you were." I felt Luke's smile grow against my cheek.
It's not a rebel status though. It's a scary freaking stupid mistake that lead into a scar of my past, tormenting every thought I've ever had about drinking.
It is no rebellion of my teenage years. More like me trying to be cool and failing by ending up in the hospital for three days.
"Just please. Stop." The heat in my chest started and the irritation was just more to add the the impatiences.
I let out a sigh and calmly reached across Harry to turn the music back up to make my point that I was done talking about it.
Although I hate rock, it's better than a dead awkward silence.
"How much longer?" I feel like we've been sitting in this car for four hours when the beach is nearly a half hour away.
"Five minutes." Luke whispered into my ear, kissing my temple. I smiled and relaxed back into him.
Five minutes. I can do this. I mentally sighed, running a hand through my straightened hair.
When we finally arrived, Niall parked in the parking space and I automatically opened the door, jumping out.
"Damn, think you get out any faster?" I glared at Niall, walking around to the back of the truck to help with every ones things.
"Shut up, Niall." I pulled the tailgate down as everyone piled out, meeting me to get there things. I pulled the cooler out with Zayn's help, placing it on the ground along with the dozens of towels that were on top.
Luke smiled at me, bending down to grab a handle. "Would you like some help, beautiful?" I smiled and nodded, the annoyance and anger starting to dissolve within my chest.
"Thank you." We started walking and I slipped my flip-flops off as we neared the sand.
The sun had sank and now the sky was left with just a dim lighting and the light from the giant fire that people were gathered around, dancing and chatting; beers in their hands.
I smiled and kept walking to the 'bar area' where all the coolers and drinks were placed. We set the ice box down and Luke automatically grabbed a two beers, handing me one.
I shook my head, my smile faltering. "You sure?" I nodded and turned to walk towards the fire where I could see Eleanor and Gemma's back.
"Hey, babe!", El called out to me, placing her arm around my shoulder. I leant into her and smiled. "Care to dance?"
"My pleasure.", We giggled. Placing my hand in hers, I smiled as we moved to the the middle of the mass of people dancing.
We daced for a few minutes, trying our best to stay steady. And let me tell you, it is hard to move when you're constantly being pushed into a tighter circle as more people crowd. I smiled at El as she took my hand, spinning me in a circle then me doing it to her.
She raised her hand that held her drink above her head and hollered then tipped her head back, taking a drink. I laughed and hollered with her as she pulled my bsck to her chest, her arm wrapping around my neck, hanging loosely on my chest.
"Don't drink?", she asked, still smiling.
"Nope.", I smiled back and popped the 'p'.
"That's alright." she looked up, a smile forming on her face as a small space between the everyone opened up. "Hey, I think someone wants to dance with you."
What?
"Huh?" I tried following her gaze, landing on a a few guys who were staring at us. Seth was the only who I recognized. He smiled and pointed his drink towards me. I smiled back, turning to El who had a smirk on her face.
"Go dance with him! Ooo! He's coming over here!", she quickly fixed my hair, and I squinted my eyes as she started to fix my make up around them.
"Ugh, El! Stop it.", I giggled. I hate when people have to get 'fixed up' just to talk to a guy. There's no point. They don't care about that kind of stuff, and if they do then they are dick heads and you can do better.
I felt a tap on my shoulder and I blushed as Eleanor smirked, turning my around. Sure enough, Seth stood infront of me, his white dress shirt unbuttoned three down and the front, right side of his shirt tucked into his navy blue shorts. I guess you could say that he looked a little preppy with his outfit like that and his dark hair pushed back off his forehead.
"Hey, Seth.", I smiled and squeezed El's hand.
"Would you care to have a dance? Or are you too good for me?", He smiled, his brown eyes reflecting off the fire.
As I glanced back to see El with her eyes wide and a smile plastered on her lips, she pushed me forward, making my decision for me.
I guess a little dance couldn't hurt. I smiled and took his hand as he guided me back to his friends. He introduced me to them quickly before circulating us back into the center. I could see El with Louis a few meters away dancing, both of them smiling.
Seth's skin was warm as his hands placed themselves on my hips, pushing up my t-shirt a little. Smiling, I ground into him using my hips to circle around his front. He pulled me closer as we danced. I threw my hands above my head smiling as the music blared louder.
I didn't realize how many people were actually here until Seth and I tried to squeeze out of the mass to get a break.
"Would you like anything?", he motioned to the cooler.
"Water, please." He smiled and handed me the wet bottle, shaking it a little to get some access water off. "Thank you.", I smiled as he placed the drink in my hold.
"Anytime. Thank you for the dance."
"Anytime.", I mocked, smiling. Just then, we were interrupted by Luke who also came for a drink.
"Still up for our date tomorrow?", he asked. I furrowed my brows, nodding.
"Uh, yeah? Why?", I chuckled, taking a drink.
"Just wanted to make sure ma' boy here didn't steal you, or anything." He leant in to Seth, both giving a 'bro hug'. His boy? "How are ya', man?", Luke smiled, placing his arm around my waist.
Seth glanced to his hand then back to my eyes smiling. "Good. How are you? Been a while."
"Yeah, it has. You should come over more often. Y'know Niall would settle his shit if you did.", Luke chuckled along with Seth.
Okay, I'm a little lost here...
"I don't know about that, man.", Seth chuckled. "He was over the other day pissed about something and just completely lost it. Like he was fucked up pretty bad.", He laughed, taking a drink of his freshly opened beer, glancing to me.
So I'm assuming he was talking about when I had to come picknhim up?
"Huh.", Luke chuckled, glancing to me. "Ready to go back?" I nodded, looking to Seth.
"Good to see ya'. Maybe catch another dance sometime?"
I nodded, smiling. "Sure thing!" We watched as he started to turn back towards his friends.
"You danced with him?"
"It's a dance, Luke. Don't get all jealous and protective now.", I smirked, pushing against his chest as I walked back towards our group, squishing the sand between my toes.
"Khlo! Hey, I was looking for you, but El said you were off dancing.", I looked up to Liam, sending him a smile as I sat down next to Gemma on the log across from the fire and the dancing crowd.
"Yeah, what'd ya' need?" I streched my feet infront of me, trying to ignore the giggling coming from the log next to ours that held Niall and Ashley along with the third wheel (a.k.a. Mia).
He looked around for a minute before his eyes landed on a tall brunette who was wearing black shorts and a strapless pink top. She was walking towards us as she held two beers. I haven't seen her before, so I'm guessing that she is either a new friend that's part of our group or she's one of their friends that they invited.
I watched as she sat next to Liam, handing him a drink. "Khlo, meet Soph. Sophia, this is my friend Khloe."
Ohhh, that's who she is.
I smiled and shook her hand. She looked a little older than him; maybe by a year or two. She seemed more sophisticated and uptight too. Not really what I would expect his type to be, but hey, who am I to judge?
"Nice to meet you. I've heard many things about you.", I smiled politely, taking a drink of my water.
"Well, all wonderful things, I hope?", she looked to Liam with a slight smirk.
"Of course, babe.", he smiled and kissed her cheek, making her blush. Okay, they're a little cuter than I expected.
I glanced up as Luke sat down next to me, kissing my cheek. I smiled and glanced down, working on digging a hole in the sand with my toes.
"Sophia.", he acknowledged, his accent sounding over the music that was starting to die down then later it got.
The moon and stars were all fully out on display now and the waves rushing to shore only added to the calming effect that was coming into play.
I smiled and rested my head against Luke's shoulder. Niall quickly caught my eye as he stood up, running back towards the truck.
Within minutes, the music was settled and people were either passed out in the sand, sitting in their own groups talking, or sitting on the many logs placed around the bomb fire.
Niall came back, tossing his keys onto a beach towel and setting a large black case in the sand. He quickly opened it, pulling out the same guitar that Liam had played for me only weeks earlier.
Everyone cheered as he set it on his lap, tuning the strings. "Is he good?", I mumbled to Luke, but it must have been loud enough for Niall to hear as he glanced up to meet my eyes.
"He's alright." I was expecting Niall to shoot Luke some snarky remark, but instead acted like he didn't hear him. Or maybe he just has selective hearing.
I smiled and leant into Luke as he placed his arm around my waist, pulling me even closer.
Everyone seemed to simmer down as Niall started to pluck the strings, not even focusing on his fingers or even the people around him, but rather my eyes.
This is a little awkward to say the least.
I want to look away and just listen to the melodic tune with out feeling like he's playing to me, but it's nearly impossible with his caribbean blue eyes capturing mine.
I wiggled in my seat a little, feeling uncomfortable. I think he got the message because he suddenly began to watch his fingers, although his position was still turned towards Luke and I.
Before I knew it, his voice broke out, calm and collected, but quite as if he was just singing between him and I- even though everyone around could hear.
There are moments in this life
when you can't fake it.
There are moments I would
walk another road.
There was something in
the broken way you said it
Singing, "Please, oh God, do not let me go."
I felt the goosebumps rise on my legs, but not from the chilled air as much as his voice and the meaning behind this song.
From the moment
I was bornI have been dying.
Yeah, we walk along
towards the great unknown.
Is it love if I have given up on trying?
Singing, "Oh my God, don't leave me alone."
Singing, "Please, oh God, do not let me go."
Oh....oh....oh... Ashley harmonized with him, her voice in greant complexion to his.
If you're up there could you
lift my heavy burden?
'Cause I cannot seem
to make this on my own.
Though I'm not sure you
can hear me I'm still begging.
Singing, "Oh my god, don't leave me alone."
Singing, "Please, oh God, do not let me go."
My heart felt heavy as he ended the song, and I couldn't over bear the tears that wanted to fall. I just wanted to cry. Everything inside me was just complete guilt and sadness for him.
Was separating us the best choice? I just needed space to clear my head. It's only been a day for crying out loud. We've only spoken a total at five sentences to eachother and I already feel like shit that we can't just be normal friends.
Niall suddenly turned his position to sit straight ahead, starting to play a John Mayer song.
"I'll be right back.", I mumbled to Luke standing up and wiping the small amount of sand from the log off of my butt.
Maybe a little cold water could help. I slowly walked away from the large group as well as the light from the fire. Walking down the sand, I managed to make it to the water just over the small hill without a scratch.
I wiped a stray tear from my face as I slipped my shorts down my legs.
Why do I have to be a girl and get so emotional over small things? Why does Niall have to have this effect on me? This is why I needed to just drop him in the first place because when I'm around him I get so confused because I don't want to be with him, yet I want to kiss his lips and his cheeks and just about every other part of his body. I want to be the one he holds in my arms, but I'm just scared to get hurt.
I'm scared to trust myself, so instead I find a comfort zone, and that tends to be Luke.
Don't get me wrong, I like Luke too, like, a lot, but there is just something about Niall.
Realizing that I am talking to myself in my head, I quickly decide to stop and take off my shirt.
I adjusted the strap of my hot pink bikini top and whipped my hair into a quick hair tie.
I slowly stepped into the water, relaxing when I realize that it is warmer than the air outside that has kissed my skin with chills and goosebumps.
Everyone says that life is so easy and that you shouldn't worry, but instead take it day by day. But how am I supposed to do that when every small thing I do impacts the future I have had set since before I can remember?
Hey guys, sorry, I would have posted Wednesday but I have been cramming for AP exams (Which all blow btw).
Just so you know, the song Niall sang will be linked tomorrow, but it's called Do not let me go by Joshua Hyslop. So you can look it up if you want :)
I REALLY want to say THANK YOU SO MUCH for the comments on the last few chapters!
Reading them is probably my second favorite thing to do next to writing. So thank you all for your support on this story too!
And oh my gosh, can we just take a moment to thank God for Rio De Janeiro???? The pictures have just been ON POINT! hahaha Love it!
I love you, stay beautiful, and have a wonderful sleep, or day of you're just waking up :)
Xx-A