READ THE A.M. BECAUSE IT'S EXTREMELY IMPORTANT OKAY? OKAY.
26ᵀᴴ CHAPTER
“Though surely to avoid attachments for fear of loss is to avoid life”
The room smells faintly of pizza and Elisha's flowery shampoo, the sound of the TV in a low volume filling the room along with the sound coming from the shower and a tree branch hitting against the window. As Harry holds his napkin with a slice of pizza, he throws his head back against the mattress of the bed and closes his eyes, shoulders hurting from how he had to curve down all day for better angles in his pictures.
The movie keeps playing but he's barely paying attention to it; has nearly forgotten he's even holding a pizza he's supposed to eat, in the first place. Sometimes, he forgets how tiresome it is to dedicate your life to the images. It's definitely the only thing he can say he truly loves, now, but yet. Harry can't live of fun only, and so days like these must exist.
He keeps his eyes closed.
Leesh comes out a second later, towel wrapped around her head and upper body hidden within a woollen jumper, mere jeans shorts fitting her hips. It's not as cold as it is outside, and albeit still a bit chilly, Harry doesn't comment on her choice when he dares one eye open just before closing it again.
She stops on her tracks and bends down toward the bedside table, opening a drawer and fumbling with the mess until she finds the pictures she's snapped with Harry's Polaroid today. As she walks closer to him, the drawer remains open, forgotten, and by the time Leesha is down on the floor next to him, he's half done with his pizza.
She shifts next to him until their hips are knocking, then carefully slides her fingers up his face 'till the moment they're over his lids. Elisha dares to open one of them, and Harry growls at the disturbance.
"What?" he mumbles out, taking another bite and crumpling the now empty napkin into a tiny ball.
Leesh smiles at him, tired out and sleepy already, the long weekend showing on each of his features. She should probably know he needs some sleep for the drive back tomorrow, but he himself can't find the necessary strength to push her away. Also, he can't sleep like this. Or shouldn't, probably.
"You should see this," she reasons, shoving the pile of pictures into his lap and awaiting quietly as he comes slowly back into himself, blinking away the sleepiness that keeps weighting on his eyelids.
The moment his surroundings seem to be back in focus, he notices an unexpected amount of photographs over his sleeping pants, some fallen face-down on the floor next to his thighs. It makes him sigh, though, more for effect than at actual anger. "You've used all my films, haven't you?" he questions, curling his fingers around the paper.
Leesha bites her lip and shakes her head in a not-so-convincing manner, eyes sort of guilty in a naïve way Harry tries to ignore and fails, laughing at her. She frowns but shakes her head once more, fiercely this time. "Not all your films. I think you've still got five pictures left or something."
Harry snorts a 'or something' under his breath but looks down at the pictures nonetheless. All of them are quite dark, because the day hasn't been one of the best for photographing, but the sensations are still there and Harry doesn't feel the smile creeping up his cheeks as he keeps looking.
Most of the pictures are from Conwy Castle, random ones ranging from old walls to a walking, distracted Harry (at which he glances at Elisha to check her reaction. She only shrugs at his silent question). A few others though are from the ruins they visited later. Harry was already done with the photo shoot there, but he was sure Leesh would quite like to visit it, and he was right.
They spent a few hours there sitting on one of the front steps once they were done with the tour inside, and from there he'd seen the nonsensical pictures she'd snapped. There's one of him with his tongue out and eyes tightly closed, his hand over his hat about to fly out with the wind, but this one is missing amongst the pile of pictures. Again, he keeps the thought to himself and hands the photographs back to Elisha.
"Nice ones," he says simply, throws his head back again and covers his eyes with his arm. "Might want to get a copy of some of those later."
Leesh hits him with the pictures on the forehead, and when he pulls his arm away she's smiling down at him and putting the pile next to his thigh. Next, she stands up as the words follow her movements. "Those are yours, idiot. It's your camera. Unless you thought it's all shit, because in that case, please don't throw my pics away. It'd be such a waste of professional work."
Harry laughs, head still thrown back, and it somehow makes him choke on his spit. "I'm just trying to find the professional in here."
Leesha glares down at him from where she's standing in the bathroom, the mirror in front of her; her hands working to get rid of the towel. "Oh shut up, you're ridiculous." She then reaches for a hairbrush and walks back into the room totally focused on the pizza. The moment she's done with brushing her hair, she sits back down and grabs a napkin to herself, not looking at Harry. "What time are we going back home tomorrow?"
He considers for a moment, staring up at the ceiling, feeling Elisha's toes nudging his shin as a gentle game. "Probably after breakfast. I gotta get there and go straight to the carwash."
Leesh hums her agreement, and then there's silence. Also the sound of her chewing, but Harry's already too dazed off to pay attention to it. The world around him starts becoming too blurry and confusing for him to handle, so he lets himself be taken by the tiredness that rushes back strong as a tidal wave. He slowly lifts himself up, the darkness from inside his lids still blocking his vision, and crawls up his bed.
The moment he crashes down on the mattress, he hears a distant feminine voice seeming incredulous as she says 'is that a drawing of me?', but he just doesn't find the strength to reply.
--
Edwin is just outside the café at the pavement, bent down caressing the dog's head and feeding him small pieces of leftover meat from lunch. Elisha's just the same, except she decided to sit on the floor and lean against the wall in a way Harry can't see her through the window from inside; not from where he's standing.
He throws the last dart which surprisingly lands on the target, and stands up in a swift move, leaving his cup of tea behind.
The clock on the wall says it's somewhat past eight now, the carwash closed for about an hour; the café as silent as it can get on evenings. Bridgit has gone to her classes and Dorothea is locked into her house upstairs the shop, so the only left is Harry, walking lazily out the door and shutting it behind him as he leans against the wall to watch as Leesh and Ed fool around with some homeless dog he's seen around quite a few times.
He wonders why they haven't adopted him yet.
Leesh is smiling widely at the pet between her legs, stepping forward and crashing onto her, trying to lick her face as she dodges away from it. Edwin has stopped feeding the dog and has sunk his hands into his sweatpants pockets instead, tilting his head slightly to the side and watching the same scene Harry is.
"Want to join her?" the old man asks, moving only his head to see Harry behind him.
He shrugs and shakes his head right after, trying to politely refuse the offer. "No, thanks. Dogs don't really like me much, dunno why." Then, Harry takes a step forward, contradicting himself by getting closer to both the woman on the ground and the dog. The scene is just lovely, actually.
"It's about how you approach them," Elisha intervenes, not looking up. Her voice is soft and smiley around the edges; a smile directed to a pet that seems to absolutely love her. "They can feel what we feel whenever we're near them, so if you keep calm and well intentioned, everything should be just fine."
Harry laughs lightly, squatting to pet the dog's head gently. "Dunno," he says again, attempting an amused tone. "I've always been kind of a nervous wreck, so."
And he keeps smiling, expecting Leesh to do just the same, but this time around she glances at him briefly with a legit concerned look. It only lasts seconds, but the moments that follow Harry's last words are filled with silence from everyone. Edwin seems oblivious to the world, Elisha keeps pinching the dog's cheeks and running her fingers through his hair, and the dog itself seems to have calmed down as well.
It's uncomfortable.
"Well, I'm going to go now. See you tomorrow," Ed announces, coming closer for a brief moment to clasp his hands over Harry's shoulders, then muss Elisha's hair.
Both of them chorus a 'bye' to Edwin as he crosses the road and clambers up his yellow truck, coming to life with a sound of rust and used. Within seconds, it disappears on the road and it takes away with it the loud sound of something already expired, but familiar nonetheless. Harry averts his glance from where the automobile used to be and the moment he looks at Leesh, he's already radiant again.
As if on cue, she peers up to meet his gaze and just then a bashed smile forms up. "This is Patsy, by the way." To give it emphasis, Leesha grabs the dog's paw and raises it as much as she can without messing up its balance.
Harry smiles wider, looks at Elisha wondering if she's noticed what she just did, and at her deadpan face he feels almost stupid. Maybe he's seeking for details in the back of his mind he shouldn't remember, but then again, it wasn't exactly a choice. It was completely automatic.
"Do you not know any other way to introduce things?" he questions, half smirking. His eyes are glinting with mischief and Leesh only squints her eyes at him, dumbfounded. "A 'hello, I am...', or 'this is...', maybe?"
Elisha rolls her eyes at him, pulling him by the shirt until his legs give in and he falls knee first on the floor next to her, one hand against the brick wall over her head for useless support.
"I absolutely despise you, Styles," she states, glare intent on his face above her. Patsy is now quiet between the both of them, head tilted up and eyes curious and innocent. "You're the absolute worst, I'll tell you."
Harry leans forward to place a kiss to the end of her nose and then sits back, this time adjusting so his back is against the wall and he's cross-legged rather than hovering over Leesh on his knees.
She looks a lot pleased with herself, so amused by the situation it's ridiculous. But then, Harry doesn't feel any different; he's light headed, body rested despite the long drive this morning. His mind, feels mostly empty and that's a huge achievement if compared to how troubled it used to be just a while ago.
Patsy shakes his tail and starts moving in circles until he's got Elisha's attention again. The dog noses against her shirt, glancing up at Harry from time to time, simply curious.
At some point, Harry sticks out his hand and lets Patsy lick it carefully, as if testing the waters before dipping in. as it seems, Harry gets his approval, if the way the dog walks over to him with his tail constantly moving up in the air is anything to go by.
The few minutes Harry manages to entertain both himself and the dog, he feels Leesh's eyes on him all along, analysing fondly the situation.
Patsy eventually goes back to her, though, and it downs on Harry that maybe Elisha doesn't have to adopt the dog, because he has already adopted her, instead.
There's some sort of connection between them, some attachment so natural and healthy.
And so, what's the point of depriving himself from developing some sort of fondness toward other people? One of life's consequences is to get attached to things, and it makes no sense to reject this part of it.
Also, Harry's quite sure he's already grown way too attached to this whole thing.
--
Author's Mind (?)
Comments: GUYS! First off, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Because I won't be updating on Saturday. Dunno if you know (you probably do, the whole fandom does), but the boys are in Brazil AKA my country :) Heya! So. I'm going to their concert on Saturday, and I'll be the whole day out. I would update on Sunday, but I won't be home either because, guess what? Yeah. Another 1D concert. I'm so sorry, except not really, because I'm so fucking excited you don't even understand. I'm pulling my hair out of nervousness and anxiety and. Ugh. Anyway, I'll be back next Wednesday with another chapter, probably a depressed one thanks to post-concert depression. Bear with it. Love you all! Wish me luck xx
Dedication (to the best comment): {@summerbabiix310} Haha thanks babe! But don't be jealous! I'm not that great, and I'm sure that if you wanted to, you could become an awesome writer too. It's good to receive some incentive, though. Promise I'll update as soon as possible.
Next Update: Wednesday; May 14th
Early Update: 500 votes