Zach, Wed Jan 2nd 2013
I slowly wake up feeling groggy and dizzy but I don't seem to hurt anywhere. I thought that there would be more pain... does that mean that what I thought happened to me last night was, in fact, just a nightmare? Am I laying down next to Thomas, still on our way to save our relationship? I don't dare open my eyes because I don't want to know.
In truth, the fact that my bed is slowly inclined, the various noises I hear and the too-clean smell are enough to let me know where I really am, but I don't want to acknowledge it just yet. I can dream for one more minute that the bench didn't happen. I want more cuddles and kisses from the gentle Thomas, rather than dealing with the aftermath of yesterday. If I am indeed in the hospital, there will be a huge bill to pay, too many questions to answer, and I don't know how I will be able to explain my disappearance to Thomas when I go home.
Yeah, despite everything that happened, I still plan on going back there. Where else would I go? I was stupid to think I could escape; I have just managed to put myself in a more complicated mess. I sigh and briefly open one eye. Yup, definitely a hospital room... Perhaps if I manage to flee without giving my name they will never know to whom to send the bill. I have no health insurance and I know from past experience that Thomas doesn't like to receive an invoice on my behalf, and he sure knows how to express his displeasure.
Yeah, I will just have to run away fast. I didn't have my wallet on me yesterday so there is no way they know my full name. I just hope I have recovered enough to do so. Well, there is only one way to find out, isn't there? I try to sit up but fall back on the bed, not because of the pain that shoots in my ass, but because of the deep voice that suddenly booms in the room.
"What do you think you're doing?" it says.
I know that voice of course. It's the one of the man who offered me his phone number. What is he still doing here? Did he stay all night in my room?
I open my eyes to look at Aiden, who is seated on a chair to my left. He is not dressed in the same hot leather pants he had yesterday so I guess he went back home at some point. His chocolate eyes are looking at me with what I think is concern, but I'm not really sure. Like Thomas always says, I'm such a bad judge of character.
"I have to get out of here," I whisper. "I don't have health insurance."
"I gathered as much," he replies. "That's why I am taking care of the bills."
"You can't! I will never be able to pay you back!"
"I know. Don't worry about it," he simply states.
Is he fucking kidding me? I wouldn't be surprised if it reaches several thousand dollars for the room. It could even go as high as a five-digit amount. What kind of person just randomly says to you that they will be paying your bill for you? Unless he expects me to repay him in another fashion. Considering what the guy does for a living, it wouldn't be surprising.
"If you think I'm going to reimburse you with sexual favors, think again!" I growl.
"There are no strings attached to my gift," he replies. "Besides, I'm hot, I don't need to pay for sex," he adds with a smirk.
It's true, he is sexy as fuck. Not that I would do anything, I still have a boyfriend, but it doesn't hurt to look.
"Why would you do that, then?" I ask him in a low voice.
There must be a reason, people just don't give away money randomly like this.
"Because I can!" he simply answers. "I just have a request for you to consider, but even if you don't follow it, I will still pay for your medical bills," he adds seriously.
"What request?" I ask warily.
Why do I immediately think of a collar, leash, and all that shit?
"Don't go back there," he tells me in a very serious tone.
"Well it's not as if I have many other options," I reply bitterly. "But thank you for your concern."
"If you really have nowhere else to go," he says gently, "you can stay in my loft for as long as you need."
"So that you can fuck me whenever you want? I think not."
"I just told you I wasn't interested in you repaying me with sex," he growls.
"Well, I won't be kneeling or crawling everywhere just for your entertainment, you sick pervert! I have had enough of this BDSM shit, thank you very much!" I yell.
The good thing about being in the hospital is that I am finally rid of Thomas' monstrous collar. The doc asked me yesterday if he could remove it and I was very glad to agree. Still, I will have to put it back if I want to find him in a not too pissy mood.
"I never proposed you to live at my place as my Submissive," he answers. "I just offered it if you need somewhere safe to stay while you get back on your feet."
Again, who does that? I can't help but feel there is an ulterior motive in this suspiciously generous offer.
"Incidentally," he adds, "what you experienced with your so-called boyfriend has nothing to do with BDSM."
"What do you mean so-called boyfriend," I reply angrily, "Thomas and I love each other very much!"
"Oh, I don't doubt that. He loves you so much he has no problem beating you for no reason, strangling you or letting his friends rape you..."
His sarcasm makes me blush deeply. Sure when you put it like this, it's hard to see the affection, but he is so much more than his bad temper.
"I'm sure that you love him," he keeps on. "But can you honestly tell me that you will be safe with him?"
I don't know what to answer so I just keep my mouth shut.
"Remember that you called me for help," he keeps on. "And this is just me offering that help. I have no hidden agenda here, except seeing you get better. Ask yourself very honestly this question, what do you think will happen if you go back there? And even if he is nice today, how much time until he hits you again... or worse? Did he strangle you until you passed out the time he left those marks? Do you know you could have never woken up from this? Do you know his friends could have infected you with HIV by fucking you bareback?"
Each one of his questions is like a blow and I see the wall that is my determination slowly crack. He is right on every account, of course. Even if it kills me to admit it, Thomas has consistently followed the pattern of fuck up, apologize, be nice and fuck up again for the past year.
You said it was his last chance after the asphyxiation part! I say to myself.
And last night was even worse. But can I even walk away from almost six years together just like that? To go stay with a stranger who has weird sexual habits?
"Why do you let him do all of this to you?" he asks even more softly.
Well, I tried to tell him to stop... that always ended well, of course... and it's not like I have any choice...
Except now I do have a choice. A very scary one at that. In option one, there is more physical abuse. But in option two, I have to leave the man I love.
"Because I deserve it..." I whisper dejectedly.
"What did you do to deserve being strangled? Or a gang rape?" he interjects.
"Before that BDSM stuff, it used to be only when I deserved it," I say in a small voice. I don't even understand why I am talking about that with him. "But things have gotten out of hand..."
"You don't say!" he exclaims. "Once again, what he did to you is nothing like BDSM! And even before, I'm sure you didn't do anything to deserve his beatings."
He takes a deep breath and sighs heavily, both his hands tightly gripping the armrests of his chair. It looks like he was suddenly very angry at something and tries to calm down.
"In any case, I think you need to put some distance between you and him for a week or two. When was the last time you hung out with someone else, on your own?"
"When I went to your office two weeks ago," I reply in a small voice.
"And before?"
I search a long time before realizing I don't even know. It's true I have been completely isolated from the rest of the world.
"See? What does it say that you can't even tell me? If you really love each other, one or two weeks won't change a thing, and don't you think you need a bit of time to figure things out on your own?"
Why does he have to sound so reasonable! It makes it really hard to resist option number two. In the end, this is the argument that wins me over. There will be hell to pay, whether I return home now or in two weeks, and it is true that a bit of alone time without having to worry about chores or his moods while I heal physically would be more than welcome.
"Alright," I finally say. "But don't expect me to do any chores!"
"I won't!" he chuckles.
"And no sex and no kinky stuff!" I warn.
"We've already covered that!"
"Then... thank you... I guess..."
He doesn't respond anything to that and just smiles softly. It's a sad and depressed smile. It almost looks like there is something else compelling him to help me. Perhaps he knew someone a bit like me... but again I am just so plain stupid, as Thomas always say, that I am probably completely off.
We are both interrupted in our reveries by the arrival of the doctor I saw last night. I was in a bit of stupor and quickly became dizzy with the painkillers, but I still remember that he looked at me everywhere, and probed into my ass with various instruments. I'm not a modest person, so I don't feel embarrassed by this in the latest... But here comes the part with the painful questions...
"Can we have a moment Mr. Turner?" he asks, clearly dismissing my benefactor.
"I will be in the waiting room," he just says as he walks out.
"How are you feeling today?" the doc asks me when we are alone.
"Great!" I lie. "When do I get out?"
"I would like to keep you under observation for another day, but you could go out now if you wanted to," he replies.
"Perfect, I'll get out of your hair then!"
Another night here means a new expensive line on the already heavy bill, and even if I'm not the one who will end up paying it, I can try to limit its amount.
"You will still have to take your painkillers and take it really easy for the next two weeks!" he warns me. "You have severe anal injuries, so that means no penetration!"
Okay, he is really blunt! Not that it bothers me... It really is a good thing I'm not going back home yet... There is no way Thomas could have waited for that long.
"You may experience pain when you have to go to the restroom, and you will probably have blood in your stool for the next three days or so. If it lasts longer, you will have to see a doctor again, is that clear?"
"Yes," I reply.
This is not the first time I have been hurt down there, though it might very well be the worst, so I have an idea of what to expect.
"Then I would like to stress to you the importance of pressing charges."
"Pressing charges?" I reply dumbly. "Against who?"
"Whoever did this to you, Zach," he says in a gentle tone.
"Did what? It's just some fun gone a bit too wild!"
I lie smoothly, with a fake smile. I knew those questions would come, so I'm prepared.
"This isn't a normal way to treat someone, Zach. You can't have enjoyed whatever caused those lacerations in your rectal lining."
Oh, trust me I did not enjoy myself.
"What can I say, I'm a kinky guy!" I answer in a cheerful tone.
"And the injuries on your neck?"
"Ever tried asphyxiation during sex, Doc?" I ask. "You should, it's great!"
Or not, but that's not the point.
"And the various fractures you had that didn't mend correctly?"
"I'm a bit clumsy and fall a lot!"
I can't remember the number of times I had to tell this particular lie. The doctor sighs heavily and sits in the armchair.
"Can you at least answer one of my questions honestly?"
It would depend on the question, I think to myself.
"Did Aiden Turner do this to you, or one of the guys at his club?" he demands.
Wait, he thinks it's their fault?
"No, Doc," I reply seriously. "I swear it's the truth this time! Aiden is a nice guy, the nicest I have met in a long time."
"So you lied before?" he asks, seemingly proud of himself.
I only said that so he doesn't blame my benefactor, but I won't tell more than this and just give him the silent treatment.
"Alright," he sighs after a while, "I'll stop asking questions about this..."
Really? That was quicker than usual.
"I have one last topic to discuss," he continues. "From what Mr. Turner told me, you had unprotected intercourse during... whatever happened yesterday. Is that true?"
"Yes, we were deep into it and putting a condom on is just a killjoy!" I answer smoothly.
They were into it, not me. I have to control my thoughts better because the mere memory is enough to make tears pool in my eyes.
"Do you know what HIV is, Zach?" he asks.
"Yes." I may be stupid but I'm not that dumb!
"With the injuries you sustained," he continues, "if one of the people you had intercourse with was HIV-positive, the probability he infected you is extremely high, because their seminal fluids came directly in contact with your blood through your wounds. Fortunately, there is an emergency treatment called PEP. I strongly recommend that you take it!"
Well thanks for your recommendation Doc, but I bet this ain't cheap and I don't want Aiden to spend too much money on me.
"No, I'll be good, thanks!" I reply. "I'm pretty sure the guys were all clean!"
I have absolutely no idea if this is true or not. I hope Thomas would have checked that small detail before, but a small voice in my head tells me he very probably did not.
"Are you really sure about this?" he asks seriously. "There is no cure for HIV that exists yet if you end up being infected, and this treatment is very effective."
"Yeah, I am!" I dismiss him.
He lets out another heavy sigh.
"Turn on your side, then, I will examine you, now."
At least the questioning part is over. The examination is no walk in the park, though. I hear him put his plastic gloves on before he inserts one finger into my ass to check how the wounds there are doing and even with the drugs, I definitely wince in pain. He explains to me that one part of my rectum is swollen, just after the anus. On top of the painkillers, he writes me a prescription for antibiotics since he is afraid I might develop an infection. Then his visit is finally over and he goes to call back Aiden from the waiting room.
"Is everything good?" he asks when he gets back in.
"Yes you can leave in a few hours after the nurse comes in to remove his IV," the doc replies. "He refused to take PEP," he adds.
"Why is that, Zach?" Aiden asks me.
There is a small shift in him as he asks this question: it feels as if he is suddenly bigger and his voice booms with natural authority. For some reason that makes my lizard twitch under my gown! Which in turns makes me feel deeply guilty, I should not think about another man other than Thomas like this.
"I don't really need it..." I reply meekly.
"No bullshit! What's the real reason?"
This time there is no mistaking the dominance in his tone.
"It must be expensive," I mumble
"And why do you care about that?"
"I don't want you to waste your money on me..." I answer.
"You'll let me decide on what I want to spend my money," he replies. "We will take the treatment," he adds in a no-nonsense voice. "And you will make sure to take it daily!" he decrees. He sounds like an overbearing overprotective asshole.
"Yes, Daddy!" I reply.
Who does he think he is to order me around like this! Even if what he says kind of makes sense...
The doctor very annoyingly chuckles and gets out of the room, leaving the two of us alone again.
"He told me you don't want to press charges," Aiden begins.
"Please, don't..." I reply.
I know what he is going to say and I don't want to hear it.
"I won't then," he says with a warm smile. "But know that you can talk to me about anything. I won't bite and I won't judge."
"Kay!"
"As soon as we can, we will go back to my place and I will help you settle down in my loft. I brought you some clothes by the way, not sure you'd want to wear the ones from yesterday and hospital gowns are not very decent. I'll go buy your medication once you're comfortably installed. Then I have to leave you tonight for my work at the club. Will you be okay on your own?"
"I'm a grown man, Daddy!" I tease him.
"Whatever you need to tell yourself, Baby!" he smirks back.
I don't know if it's the fact that I find it funny that he would play along or the prospect of not going back home for a while, but even with the nagging pain in my butt, for the first time in a very long time, I smile. A true, warm and hopeful smile.
Published on October 25th 2017
So Zach agreed to live with Daddy Aiden for the time being. Don't expect them to have sex anytime soon though, they still have a long way to go before that happens. The Daddy/Baby thing however... ;-)
Next update will be on Friday!